how to build REAL confidence: self-worth tips, magnetic confidence, beat insecurities and glow up!💖

Summary

In this empowering video, the speaker shares her personal journey from shyness to confidence, offering seven in-depth tips for building genuine self-assurance. She emphasizes the importance of internal confidence over external appearances, the power of affirmations to combat self-doubt, and the significance of authenticity. The speaker encourages viewers to step out of their comfort zones, embrace embarrassment, and engage in self-compassion. By reflecting on personal growth and celebrating achievements, she inspires a shift towards self-love and a lasting confidence that isn't reliant on external validation.

Takeaways

• 🌟 The speaker transformed from a shy girl to a confident social media influencer and extrovert.
• 🔑 External confidence can be achieved by 'faking it till you make it', but internal confidence is more sustainable and important.
• 🗣️ Internal confidence means not seeking approval from others and trusting your own opinion.
• 💬 Affirmations are crucial for reframing negative self-perception and decreasing self-doubt.
• 🚀 Building a portfolio of proof against self-doubt involves stepping out of your comfort zone and overcoming limiting beliefs.
• 😳 Embarrassment is a choice and can be managed through exposure therapy and changing your mindset.
• 🧡 Authenticity is key to real confidence; it involves being true to yourself and not fitting into others' expectations.
• 💌 Confidence is linked to self-love, which is about loving yourself regardless of external achievements or failures.
• 🤗 Engaging in conversation with your younger self can provide motivation and a sense of achievement, boosting confidence.
• 🌈 The speaker emphasizes the importance of an abundance mindset, focusing on progress and achievements rather than what's lacking.

Q & A

What is the main theme of the video script?

The main theme of the video script is personal transformation and building self-confidence. It discusses the journey from being shy and insecure to becoming an extroverted, confident individual.

What are the two types of confidence discussed in the script?

The script discusses external and internal confidence. External confidence involves projecting confidence through body language and behavior, while internal confidence comes from self-trust and not seeking approval from others.

How does the speaker suggest using affirmations to build confidence?

The speaker suggests using affirmations to reframe negative self-perception and to counteract self-hate. Affirmations are meant to empower oneself and to speak a confident self into existence, which helps in reducing self-doubt.

What is the role of stepping out of one's comfort zone in building confidence according to the script?

Stepping out of one's comfort zone is crucial for building confidence as it helps in overcoming self-doubt and proving to oneself that one is capable. It involves consistently challenging oneself with new experiences.

How does the speaker define embarrassment, and how can one overcome it?

Embarrassment is defined as a choice and a social construct. To overcome it, one should expose themselves to situations that cause embarrassment, which helps in desensitizing oneself to the feeling and realizing that others' opinions are not as important as one's own self-approval.

What is the importance of authenticity in building real confidence?

Authenticity is important because it allows one to be true to themselves, attract people and opportunities that align with their true self, and live without the fear of judgment from others. It leads to a more genuine and fulfilling life, which in turn builds real confidence.

How does the speaker relate confidence to self-love?

The speaker relates confidence to self-love by stating that true confidence comes from loving oneself unconditionally, regardless of external achievements or failures. It involves accepting oneself fully, including flaws and mistakes, and recognizing one's worth from within.

What is the significance of engaging in a conversation with one's younger self as a confidence-building exercise?

Engaging in a conversation with one's younger self helps in recognizing personal growth and progress. It allows one to reflect on achievements and appreciate how far they've come, which boosts confidence and motivates further progress.

What advice does the speaker give for someone who is trying to become more confident?

The speaker advises to focus on internal confidence, use affirmations, step out of one's comfort zone, embrace authenticity, practice self-love, and engage in conversations with one's younger self to appreciate personal growth. These strategies help in building a sustainable and genuine confidence.

How does the speaker's personal transformation serve as an inspiration for the viewers?

The speaker's personal transformation from being shy and insecure to becoming a confident social media influencer and model serves as an inspiration. It demonstrates that significant personal change is possible, encouraging viewers to believe in their potential to up-level their lives through confidence.

Outlines

00:00

🌟 Personal Transformation and Confidence Building

The speaker shares her personal journey from being an extremely shy and insecure individual to becoming a confident social media influencer and extrovert. She emphasizes the importance of internal confidence over external appearances and discusses the significance of not seeking approval from others. The paragraph introduces seven confidence-building strategies that will be covered in the video, with a focus on internal confidence as the key to sustainable self-assurance.

05:02

🗣️ The Power of Affirmations and Self-Talk

This section delves into the role of affirmations in reshaping one's self-perception and combating negative self-talk. The speaker clarifies that while affirmations alone may not instantly boost confidence, they are crucial for reducing self-doubt and fostering a positive self-image. She also discusses the impact of social media on self-esteem and shares her own experiences and strategies for overcoming societal pressures and unrealistic beauty standards.

10:03

🚀 Overcoming Self-Doubt Through Action

The speaker advocates for stepping out of one's comfort zone as a means to build a 'portfolio of proof' against self-doubt. By consistently challenging oneself and taking actions that initially induce fear or discomfort, one can dismantle limiting beliefs and develop genuine confidence. The paragraph highlights the importance of facing and overcoming fears as a pathway to authentic self-assurance.

15:04

😅 Embracing Embarrassment and Authenticity

In this part, the speaker addresses the social construct of embarrassment and encourages viewers to see it as a choice rather than an inevitable response. She suggests that authenticity is key to true confidence and that one should not be afraid of being judged or appearing 'cringy.' The speaker shares her own experiences with public self-expression and the liberation that comes from disregarding others' opinions and judgments.

20:06

💖 Authenticity Leads to Real Confidence and Love

The speaker discusses the importance of authenticity in building lasting confidence and attracting meaningful relationships and opportunities. She explains that being true to oneself, rather than conforming to societal expectations, leads to a more fulfilling and confident life. The paragraph also touches on the idea of self-love being the foundation of confidence, where one's worth is not attached to external achievements but to an internal sense of self-worth and acceptance.

🤔 Reflecting on Progress and Self-Love

This section encourages viewers to reflect on their personal growth and progress as a means to build confidence. The speaker suggests envisioning a conversation with one's younger self to appreciate how far they've come and to recognize the small victories that contribute to self-assurance. The paragraph emphasizes the importance of self-love that is not conditional on external achievements but is rooted in an unconditional love for oneself.

🔚 Conclusion and Final Thoughts on Confidence

The speaker concludes the video by reiterating the transformative power of confidence and the importance of the strategies discussed. She invites viewers to follow her on social media for more tips and encourages them to watch her previous video on confidence for additional insights. The paragraph serves as a wrap-up, highlighting the speaker's personal transformation and the potential for viewers to experience similar changes in their lives.

Keywords

💡Confidence

Confidence refers to a feeling of self-assurance and belief in one's own abilities. In the video, it's the central theme where the speaker discusses her personal transformation from being shy and insecure to becoming an extroverted and self-assured individual. The script emphasizes building confidence through various strategies like 'faking it till you make it' and stepping out of one's comfort zone.

💡Internal Confidence

Internal confidence is the self-assurance that comes from within, independent of external validation. The video distinguishes it from external confidence, highlighting that true confidence is not seeking approval from others. It's about trusting your own opinion and making decisions without the need for reassurance, which is a key aspect of the speaker's journey to self-assurance.

💡Affirmations

Affirmations are positive statements that individuals repeat to themselves to challenge and overcome self-sabotaging and negative thoughts. The script mentions that while affirmations alone may not instantly boost confidence, they are crucial for reframing negative self-perception and fostering self-empowerment, which is part of the broader strategy to build internal confidence.

💡Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is the feeling of uncertainty in one's own abilities or decisions. The video suggests that to build real confidence, one must overcome self-doubt by consistently stepping out of their comfort zone and proving to oneself that they are capable. This is exemplified when the speaker talks about meeting new people and going on photo shoots despite feeling nervous.

💡Embarrassment

Embarrassment is a feeling of self-consciousness or shame, often brought about by the fear of being judged negatively by others. The video encourages viewers to see embarrassment as a choice and to desensitize themselves to it by exposing themselves to situations that might typically cause embarrassment, which is a strategy the speaker used to become more confident.

💡Authenticity

Authenticity is the state of being true to one's own personality, feelings, and beliefs. The script emphasizes the importance of authenticity in building real confidence, suggesting that being genuine and not fitting into societal norms or expectations is key to self-love and attracting the right opportunities and people.

💡Self-Love

Self-love is the act of appreciating and having a deep affection for oneself. The video posits that confidence is intrinsically linked to self-love, which is not based on external achievements but on accepting oneself wholly, including flaws and past mistakes. The speaker illustrates this by encouraging viewers to love themselves unconditionally, regardless of external circumstances.

💡External Validation

External validation is the need for approval or confirmation from others to feel good about oneself. The script argues against seeking external validation, suggesting that it undermines confidence. The speaker shares her experience of not needing others' approval before posting on social media as an example of building internal confidence.

💡Comfort Zone

A comfort zone is a behavioral state within which a person operates in an environment where they feel at ease and in control. The video encourages stepping out of the comfort zone as a means to build a 'portfolio of proof' against self-doubt, which is illustrated by the speaker's experiences in meeting new people and going on photo shoots despite initial discomfort.

💡Manifestation

Manifestation, in the context of the video, refers to the practice of materializing one's desires or goals through positive thinking and affirmations. The speaker mentions affirmations as a form of manifestation, suggesting that speaking positively about oneself can help bring about the desired confident self into reality.

💡Self-Compassion

Self-compassion is the practice of being kind and understanding towards oneself, especially in instances of pain or failure. The video touches on self-compassion as a means to counteract self-criticism and to foster a healthier self-image, which is part of the process of building confidence from within.

Highlights

The speaker shares a personal transformation from a shy, insecure individual to a confident, outgoing person.

Emphasizes the importance of internal confidence over external confidence, which involves 'faking it till you make it'.

Advocates for not seeking approval from others and trusting one's own opinion as a step towards internal confidence.

Affirmations are introduced as a tool to reframe negative self-perception and decrease self-doubt.

The concept of building a 'portfolio of proof' against self-doubt by stepping out of one's comfort zone is discussed.

Embarrassment is described as a choice and a social construct that can be overcome.

Authenticity is positioned as a key component of real confidence, encouraging individuals to be true to themselves.

The idea that confidence is linked to self-love and acceptance, regardless of external achievements, is presented.

Engaging in conversation with one's younger self is suggested as a method to build confidence and gratitude for personal growth.

The video offers seven in-depth tips and strategies for building confidence.

External confidence is easier to achieve but may not lead to sustainable self-assurance.

The role of social media and its impact on self-perception and confidence is examined.

The speaker shares personal anecdotes to illustrate the journey from shyness to confidence.

The importance of not seeking external validation and the value of self-approval are highlighted.

The practice of affirmations is explored as a means to challenge and change negative self-talk.

Overcoming self-doubt through consistent action and facing fears is emphasized.

The concept of choosing not to be embarrassed and the power of exposure therapy are introduced.

Authenticity is encouraged as a means to attract the right people and opportunities into one's life.

The necessity of self-love as the foundation for true confidence is discussed.

Reflecting on personal growth and achievements as a way to build confidence is suggested.

Transcripts

listen I went from being the quietest

shyest girl in the room who could never

make new friends because she was so

terrified of speaking to new people so

being the extroverted Life of the Party

who could walk up to a running stranger

and strike up a conversation with them I

went from being so insecure about myself

that I had to hide my face in every

single photo taken of me to literally

doing modeling shoots and being a social

media influencer I went from chasing

people because I was so desperate for

other people's approval to going out

sitting in restaurants alone and just

being okay with being myself because I'm

so detached and confident in who I am if

I can make that much of a transformation

and up level my life through my

confidence you sure as hell can if you

live that life you will never attain

confidence that not right that is

embarrassing that means that you're

judging yourself anyways I need to just

calm down and take a deep breath I'm

just very passionate about this hello

everyone and welcome back to my channel

today's video is super important because

I'm going to be sharing with you seven

in-depth real confident tips and

strategies that you can start

implementing today to become your new

and improved confident self for the new

year but before you watch this video or

maybe even after I actually have a

previous video that I filmed on my

channel it's the part one to this video

which is called how to be confident is

one of my most popular videos I'm super

proud of it and it's got real strategies

that will help you become confident I'm

not going to be repeating any of those

tips in this video we're going to be

talking about new strategies but I'll

leave it linked in the description and

it's linked up here and remember that I

consistently share confidence tips on my

Tick Tock under my playlist called body

tips and you'll find regular content on

there every single day so let's get into

the confidence tips number one is

external versus internal confidence

external confidence is easier to achieve

because it involves a lot of Faking it

till you make it which I'm a massive

believer in and that really helped me

develop my own confidence I love fake it

to your makeup I definitely recommend

embodying the characteristics of your

dream self until they naturally become a

part of who you are but I covered all of

that advice in my confidence part one

video like I mentioned before so today

we're going to be talking about internal

confidence which is much more important

yes external confidence can be useful

you know people give you tips like

always make eye contact have the right

posture talk to everybody never be on

your phone have positive body language

using those tips will make sure that

you're definitely successful in fooling

other people into thinking you're super

confident even if you're super shy and

introverted on the inside but when you

go home after faking it till you make it

and you then have to face your inner

dialogue again you won't feel confident

on the inside and this is where internal

confidence comes from it's much more

sustainable and it means you'll be

confident all of the time so what does

internal confidence mean it means not

seeking approval from others you know

when you're posting something on

Instagram don't send a picture in your

group chat for them to approve it first

if you like it then that's enough you

should start trusting your own opinion

your opinion is valid it doesn't matter

what anybody else thinks post it you

don't need a second opinion and

reassurance from other people with every

decision you make when you decide to do

that what you're basically saying to

yourself is I don't trust my own opinion

and my own opinion probably isn't

correct so I need other people to tell

me what I should do and that right there

is gradually decreasing your confidence

over time confidence tip number two

affirmations only work in reframing your

negative self-perception and inner

critic everybody asks yeah but do

affirmations actually work you know

saying you're abused feeling confident

in a mirror every day isn't gonna

magically make you so I completely agree

the other tips I'm about to go through

in this video they will help you become

conflict very quickly but affirmations

the purpose of them is to help you work

backwards from your self-hate from

everything bad you say about yourself

from your inner critic and yes it might

not necessarily make you confident

overnight but what it will do is it will

decrease your self-doubt and it will

make sure that the confidence you have

isn't decreasing affirmations is about

self-empowerment it's about believing in

yourself and knowing what you want is

achievable and that you're capable of it

and remember your thoughts reflect your

reality if you constantly think I'm not

worthy of this I'm not attractive I'm

never gonna be able to date that kind of

person you are vote because that's what

you're constantly feeding to yourself

every single day plus affirmations is a

very well known form of manifestation so

if you want to become a confident person

you need to speak that dream confident

self into reality into existence

affirmations are so crucial because it

will force you to make a habit out of

speaking to yourself positively and a

lot of us suffer from self-hate and it's

not even our fault we live in a digital

age with so many unrealistic beauty

standards and being able to see other

people's Lifestyles at the click of a

button and that causes so much

comparison and that then breeds so much

insecurity so not only do I use

affirmations on a daily basis to remind

myself of the dream person I'm working

towards but also I've done a lot of

techniques to reverse that self-hate

that's so embedded in all of us for

example I changed my online consumption

habits I started following real people

people who look like me without surgery

Brown women who showed off and were

proud of their ethnic features it also

made me fall back in love with my

culture and my skin color and my ethnic

features again and that really helped

increase my confidence instead of

following celebrities that started

following educational creators so every

day when I went on social media I wasn't

thinking about oh my God these people

live in a mansion and they're so rich

and I have nothing but I was just

learning new things and I wasn't

constantly comparing myself to strangers

on the internet every day and lastly

with affirmations I think talking to our

younger selves is a great way to

practice affirmation when you're

engaging in this self-hate behavior and

you're criticizing yourself or yourself

that is growing the one thing that

immediately snaps me out of that is

envisioning my younger self any bad

things I'm saying to myself and being

hard on myself I imagine not saying that

to the six or seven year old version and

instantly it forces me to empathize with

myself this is really important to have

self-compassion so yes affirmation

doesn't magically lead to a huge growth

in confidence overnight but it does

prevent you from damaging the confidence

you already have and this leads me to

confidence tip number three instead of

relying on affirmations build a whole

portfolio of proof against yourself

doubt the best truest way to build real

confidence is to overcome your

self-doubt you basically need to prove

to yourself that you are capable and

every single limiting belief you have

about yourself is false because that's

the thing that's holding you back from

developing real confidence in my opinion

the only way to do this and I practice

this all the time is consistently

stepping out of your comfort zone this

is where we start building a portfolio

of proof that we are confident and we

are deserving and we can do anything we

put our minds to which is Ultimate

confidence for example I would say I'm a

pretty confident person but I still get

very nervous meeting new people going on

photo shoots every single time a day

comes where I'm like oh my God I have to

go out and meet a bunch of new people

today I'm so scared and I want to cancel

so bad because it's so uncomfortable I

don't want to do it I want to stay in my

bedroom and be in my little cocoon and

be an introvert in peace do I do that no

I force myself every single time I have

to meet the photographer I have to meet

these new people I have to put myself in

that situation where I'm forced into

being an extrovert even though that's

not natural for me is it uncomfortable

for the first five minutes absolutely

because I don't want to do it once I'm

that and I'm doing it and then I've

completed it I've come home what do I

feel like I feel amazing I feel on top

of the world I'm like wow actually that

wasn't as scary as I thought it would be

and I survived it and everything was

okay so then I do it again and then the

second time I do it it's also not that

scary it's actually way less scary than

it was the first time and then wow now I

can do it the third time without even

wanting to cancel and once you

consistently prove to yourself that I

could put myself in an unfamiliar

situation and get through it your

self-doubt will fade away because it has

nothing to go off of whereas the fastest

way to grow your self-doubt which is the

ultimate confidence killer is by

consistently saying you're gonna do

something and then never doing it if you

live that life you will never attain

confidence confidence tip number four

embarrassment is a choice it's literally

just a concept in fact it's a social

construct you can literally choose not

to be embarrassed every single time you

choose to feel embarrassed you feel

unconfident you're like oh my God I feel

so insecure I can't believe I did that

but why is it that deep why are you

beating yourself up for like making a

mistake or like if you fell over in

public okay so okay and are you gonna

see any of those people again no it's

normal it happens the fastest way to

desensitize yourself to being cringed or

being embarrassing is through exposure

therapy and what this means is

constantly putting yourself out there

once again linking back to the stepping

outside of your comfort zone and doing

things that normally would kind of make

you feel embarrassed or cringe and you

are now intentionally doing those things

so you're signaling to your brain oh

look I'm doing this and it's fine and

it's not embarrassing it's not cringy

for example filming yourself in public

being a YouTuber very hard to do I had

to force myself to do it the first few

times I did it I went to hide my camera

away I don't want to make eye contact

with anyone if a bunch of people working

towards me I'd literally put my vlogging

camera away and I'd stop because I'd

feel so cringy and embarrassing now I do

it in the back of my mind I'm like oh my

God this is so scary what are people

thinking I grabbed my vlogging camera I

hold it high and I'm walking through a

bunch of people in the middle of the

city center vlogging speaking to myself

in front of a camera and I'm from a

small town so people can be very judgy

about this and everyone's staring at me

and in my head I'm like I'm doing it I'm

fine nothing's happening to me this is

safe and I'm gonna get the content I

need and I don't care what any of these

people say because I'm never going to

see them again oh you don't like what I

did or you think that's cringy or you

think like me falling over whatever is

embarrassing okay but your approval

isn't that deep to me so

I'm just gonna carry on with my life

over here and probably never see you

again but literally like next time you

catch yourself feeling embarrassed just

remember what you're saying to yourself

is that that random person like whoever

they are their approval matters more to

you that you are now going to put

yourself through feelings of guilt and

shame because you're so concerned about

what somebody else thinks about you for

like five seconds of their day because

after the first five seconds they're

gonna forget about you

let that sink in like literally my

validation and my approval is the only

thing that matters to me so see ya

embarrassment is literally just fear and

anticipation of the negative opinions

other people might have of you just let

that sink in for a second and realize

how crazy it is at the end of the day

nobody has any grounds to stand on when

it comes to judging me you know why

because everybody's cringe everybody's

cringe some people are just better at

hiding it than others and to those

people I say shame on you shame on you

own your cringe okay why are you out

here hiding it you are not being

authentic because you are so concerned

with what other people think about you

and I'm sorry but that that right there

is embarrassing and you're probably

gonna feel embarrassed when I say that

because you haven't desensitized

yourself to be in cringed and because

now I have a negative opinion of you

you're gonna take that on do you see how

ridiculous that is why do you care what

I think I'm a stranger I'm literally

talking to you through a screen right

now anyways I need to just calm down and

take a deep breath I'm just very

passionate about this like just openly

be cringe and just be authentic because

let me tell you the benefits to being

being authentic are endless and lastly

if you think people are judging you what

other people think you're embarrassing

what that really means and this is a

fact

that means that you're judging yourself

if you think other people are gonna

think what you're doing is embarrassing

that means you think what you're doing

is embarrassing and you need to reverse

that mindset and work back from it

because I judge myself all the time I

was like vlogging in public and taking

pictures of myself by myself with a

tripod at public with people staring at

me and walking past and I felt shame

that I shouldn't be doing that you know

people are going to walk past and

they're going to think who is this girl

and like she thinks she's some sort of

celebrity why why did I feel bad about

that I'm not hurting anybody I'm not

doing anything bad so I had to stop

judging myself and I had to condition

myself into thinking this is okay it's

okay to film yourself in public and take

pictures yes maybe it's not normal but

it's okay and I don't need to be so

harsh on myself about that and once I

was kinder to myself which is once again

like I mentioned before where

affirmations come into play

automatically I'm gonna stop thinking

that everybody around me is judging me

because what is there to judge

confidence tip number five authenticity

real confidence is destroying the fear

of being authentic don't get it twisted

okay 90 of people on this planet are so

terrified of being authentic that they

follow the crowd and they want to be

like everybody else and just fit in

that's an actual like psychological fact

that people just think the way that

they'd rather just fit in with everyone

even if they're not fully being

themselves and that's so messed up don't

let it be you and I'm not judging okay

I'm not judging because I used to be the

same I wanted people to like me and I

want to make friends and just like be

approved of because I had no internal

confidence so I just used to do whatever

I had to do to fit in with everybody

else but you know what yes half the time

that will work people will like you

because you're being just like them but

you know what that will also cause so

much resentment because you're not being

yourself and you you don't you lose

yourself you don't even know who you are

so let's cut that out right now and

let's talk about authenticity instead

because ever since I decided to start

living authentically so many more

blessings have come to me in my life the

benefits include attracting people that

actually meant for you when I'm if I'm

being cringy or passionate like online

and fully being myself instead of like

trying to be what I think people want

from me like yes it might mean a lot of

people don't like me because they think

I'm too loud or cringe or whatever but

the few people that do like me are the

people that are actually meant for me

because I'm attracting people who match

my energy and my vibe if I'm constantly

being fake and trying to fit in how do I

know that the people in my life are

actually meant for me and love and

appreciate me for who I am being

authentic means you're going to attract

the opportunities that are meant for you

if you're putting yourself out there

with like filming in public for example

who knows who might Scout you who knows

who wants to hire you as a credit career

or a model do the things that are real

to you so you can get where you're meant

to be in life you know don't chase jobs

or passions that you think you're meant

to do because you're never going to be

happy that way and lastly of course

being authentic means that you are going

to get a new found sense of confidence

and reach your higher self you are going

to be putting out the best energy and

operating at such a high frequency and

vibration because you're finally being

yourself there's no resentment there's

no constantly worrying about okay but

how am I presenting myself and dressing

and acting you don't have to constantly

check yourself on everything because

you're just living freely and being

yourself and when you get used to living

like your real self then you also fall

in love with yourself and you learn more

about who you are as a person and

develop the confidence that goes with

that so how do I actually become

authentic this is how first and foremost

get to know yourself fully the more you

know about who you are at your core the

more that is to respect and admire and

fall in love with okay maybe Journal

about it really Journey inwards okay

what are my principles what are my

values what do I love what are my

absolute pet peeves what do I stand for

what do I stand against what are my

passions how do I treat people how do I

want to be loved and eventually what

that's going to transfer into is I

really love and appreciate my passions

or my desire to help other people or how

much I care about my siblings or my

parents I love my desire to create art

and Inspire and it goes on and on and on

but if you're constantly trying to fit

into the crowd you could never say those

things about yourself you're just

eventually losing your individuality and

your uniqueness to fit in with the

majority and what is there to live about

yourself if you're not being yourself

next explore your values your weaknesses

your strengths your weaknesses your

Styles your preferences and then act

accordingly embody that every single day

for example I love wearing super bright

colors I love wearing massive jewelry is

that the biggest Trend at the moment no

everybody loves the tiny little gold

hoops which are also cute but I love

these does that mean I fit in or I'm

following the latest fashion crazes and

styles and trends like no but that's

okay because I'm being myself and I feel

a little better about myself because I'm

following that you might really like a

particular aesthetic but you stray away

from that because you want to look good

to the other gender or to your friends

or to society whatever and that's

destroying your confidence because

you're telling yourself it doesn't

matter what I like and it doesn't matter

who I want to be I have to be somebody

else in order to be accepted which is

false and that's just breeding extra

insecurity you know if you have a super

controversial opinion that other people

might not agree with own it say it as

long as it's not hurting anybody and

it's not like really inappropriate own

it because yeah five or six people might

hate you for having that opinion and

they're like you're so wrong but one or

two people that hear it might be like yo

like I have the same opinion and I was

so scared to say it and then you Bond

and then that's like an actual real

friend who likes you for you instead of

all these five or six people that you

don't even align with and finally if

you're authentic and someone tries to

hate on you you own it because when

you're being authentic you're telling

yourself me being real Trump's being

liked by everybody I know not

everybody's gonna like my fully

authentic self and that's okay when

you're trying to fit in with everybody

you're telling yourself that being liked

by everybody is more important than

being myself confidence tip number six

confidence equals real love if you are

not fully and completely in love with

who you are you will never reach full

confidence for example if you only feel

really good about yourself and confident

when your makeup is done and when you've

got the cutest outfit on when you've got

straight A's in your exams when you got

the job the achievement when you went to

the gym every single day for a week and

then you feel good about yourself yeah

that's great but that's not real

confidence the reason that confidence

comes from self-love is self-love is all

about loving yourself no matter what

okay self-love isn't built on attaching

your Worth to external achievements like

hitting the gym or winning an award or

getting your dream job or making a

certain amount of money real self-love

is even if I have I'm going to the gym

all month it's okay I'm still attractive

and I'm so lovable and desirable and

completely whole and worthy as a human

being that's where confidence comes from

because if you are attaching your

confidence and self-love to external

things like grades and opportunities and

success

once those things start to crumble away

or you're having a bad day at work or

you got fired or whatever all of your

confidence and self-love is going to

drift away with that opportunity because

you attached your confidence and

self-love to that thing it needs to be

attached internally to who you are

self-love isn't just acknowledging all

of your favorite qualities it's

acknowledging all of your past mistakes

your flaws your weaknesses all of the

stuff you're super bad at and accepting

them and being like that's okay that's

who I am and I'm gonna own it you

forgive yourself and you understand that

all of those flaws and Imperfections are

necessary factors to get you to where

you need to be or like all of the past

mistakes you've made have been important

factors in getting you to the growth of

your current self so remember if you

failed an exam that doesn't Define my

intelligence or how capable I am in the

future or that I won't be successful in

life if I got rejected by that boy or

girl that doesn't mean that I'm not

desirable and I won't find Love Don't

let failures and external things Define

your character and your worth it should

all come from the inside and from the

love you have for yourself and once you

you master that your confidence will

naturally grow alongside it and the last

confidence tip number seven

your younger self engage in conversation

with your younger self close your eyes

and literally Envision them standing in

front of your current self if you have

to now look at how far you've come no

actually look at how far you've come

because all of us are constantly

programmed to think about how far we

have to go and how much progress we have

to make that we rarely just stop and

pause to reflect on everything we've

achieved thus far and how great we're

actually doing you can still have a long

way to go before you get to your dream

place in life and you can still be

grateful for all of this stuff all of

the obstacles that you've already

overcome even if they're only a few and

you still have majority of the journey

to go that's okay but remember to

reflect and be grateful on everything

you've already done so I don't care if

you failed your exam or you haven't got

your dream job or you haven't found your

soulmate because instead you should be

looking at every single small win you've

achieved in the past things you've got

now that you're taking for granted

because realistically your younger self

could have only dreamed of having what

you currently have even even if you

haven't achieved your wider stream you

still have to things now that your

younger self didn't have and that is

something to celebrate and constantly be

grateful for the new circle of friends

you have the opportunities you have

where you live your new wardrobe that

you own your new skills the wisdom you

have the lessons you've learned over the

last few years see this step is crucial

in building your confidence because it's

constantly reassuring you that you are

succeeding and you are capable of doing

even more when you see how far you've

come it will provide motivation for you

to keep going because if you've got all

of this stuff already from that pasta

then you can get even more in the future

and this ultimately builds confidence in

your intelligence your abilities and

your determination take me for an

example I am not nearly where I want to

be in life I'm only 22 years old I've

got so far so long to go I still live

with my family I just about finished uni

I haven't traveled the world yet I

haven't bought my first designer bag yet

I got a lot of things to take off my

to-do list trust me but I constantly

remember that if my 15 year old self

Could See Me Now she'd be like whoa she

would be so impressed like actually if

my 15 year old self is walking down the

street and my current 22 year old self

is walking past her she would look at me

in awe like she would be so jealous of

me she'd want to be me so bad like so

bad and that's how I know I'm doing like

a live but yeah okay maybe I haven't

moved up and maybe I haven't done all

the big things in the world but I still

made significant progress that my

younger self is proud of me and that is

all I want that is the most important

win and by constantly reminding myself

that by the age of 22 I've already

become someone that my younger self

would be so impressed with that gives me

so much motivation to keep going just to

see how far I can take it because when

you constantly remind yourself of

everything you've done so far and all of

the small wins that just builds

confidence in yourself and your

abilities and you're like I've done this

much I can keep going and getting more

and if you look at this from the big

picture really it's about having an

abundance mindset and reminding yourself

of how much you can do how much you have

done and yes maybe it's not everything

you've ever wanted to do but start

focusing on the good not the lack and

that brings us to the end of this video

I hope you guys enjoyed this video I

absolutely loved it I was definitely

getting way too passionate in some part

of this video just because confidence

truly changed my life if any of you

could see like actually talk to the

version of me like from a few years ago

you would not believe that I was that

shy and that quiet and I've transformed

into a completely different kind of

person which is so possible for each and

every one of you watching this as well

if you're not already following me on

Tick Tock make sure you do because I

always post confidence tips on there and

also check out my Instagram if you're

feeling it and for now if you really

want some more confidence tips then make

sure you check out the first confidence

video ever posted it will be tagged

somewhere on the screen if not in the

description I hope you guys have a

lovely day and I'll see you guys in my

next video bye

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