7 Life Lessons I Wish I Knew Sooner

Summary

The video shares seven life lessons the host wishes he had known earlier. These include appreciating the value of mental space, doing difficult things early in the morning, defining constraints then optimizing within them, using 'last man standing' as a strategy for success, avoiding over-optimization at the expense of fun, recognizing 'dream moments', and focusing on enjoying the journey rather than obsessing over destinations.

Takeaways

• 😀 Don't underestimate the value of headspace - make time for it even when busy
• 😊 Wake up early and do the hard/important things first
• 😏 Choose life constraints first, then optimize work around them
• 😎 'Last Man Standing' can be a successful strategy - persist the longest
• 😕 Don't optimize the fun out of things you enjoy
• 😍 Recognize and appreciate 'dream moments' when they happen
• 🥳 Destinations and achievements rarely bring happiness - enjoy the journey
• 🧐 Be wary of taking things too seriously - apply lightness instead
• 🤓 Focus is valuable - prioritize only the most important things
• 😇 Enjoy the process - don't get overfocused on outcomes

Q & A

What is the first life lesson Matt wishes he had known sooner?

The first life lesson is to not underestimate the value of headspace and free time. Matt found that even when his calendar seemed open, he was still overscheduled, leading to burnout. Having breathing room is valuable.

What routine has Matt found valuable recently?

Matt has started working out 4 times a week at 7 or 8am. This consistency has increased his energy, productivity, and motivation across all areas of life.

How does James Clear approach work-life balance?

James Clear focuses on the life he wants first, then optimizes his work schedule around that. This ensures he has time for family while still working on important projects.

What is the 'last man standing' success strategy?

The idea is that the key to long-term success is simply persisting. As long as you show up consistently, good things will happen over a long enough timeframe.

How can creators avoid burning out?

Creators should be wary of optimizing the fun out of their work. It's important to balance optimization with enjoyment to ensure sustainability.

What has Matt learned from hitting bestseller status?

Reaching a goal like bestseller status brought Matt relief, but only momentary happiness. Goals themselves don't provide lasting fulfillment - it's the journey that matters.

How can you appreciate positive moments more?

When you find yourself living a moment you used to only dream about, take time to appreciate how far you've come and give your past self a virtual high five.

What quote resonated most with Matt?

The quote 'there is no achievement you could possibly achieve that will make you any happier than you are right now' stood out. Happiness comes from within, not external validation.

Why does Matt now want to 'de-optimize' his podcast?

Optimizing systems can be helpful initially, but taken too far can ruin enjoyment. Matt wants to get back to the core reasons he loves podcasting.

What's the key takeaway about achieving goals?

Goals can provide direction, but happiness comes from loving the process, not hitting the outcome. Stay focused on enjoying the journey.

Outlines

00:00

🙌 Lesson 1 - The value of headspace

<paragraph1> emphasizes the importance of headspace and not overloading yourself with too many projects and commitments. It talks about Thomas feeling burnt out while marketing his book due to taking up too much mental energy. He realizes there is value in focusing on one thing at a time rather than trying to juggle multiple big goals.

05:01

😃 Lesson 2 - Wake up early to do difficult tasks

<paragraph2> recommends waking up an hour earlier each day to work on tasks you struggle with or avoid, using the example of fitness. Thomas found that consistently working out in the mornings greatly improved his energy, productivity, work output and health.

10:01

📐 Lesson 3 - Define constraints before optimizing work

<paragraph3> advises first deciding the lifestyle and work-life balance you want, then optimizing your work process within those constraints. It refers to James Clear's approach of boxing off the family life he wants then streamlining his work around that.

15:03

👍 Lesson 4 - Last man standing often wins

<paragraph4> puts forward the idea that persisting longer than others is a hugely valuable business and YouTube strategy. As long as you weather ups and downs without quitting, you set yourself up for long-term success.

20:03

😁 Lesson 5 - Don't optimize the fun out

<paragraph5> warns against over-optimization that sucks out the enjoyment of an activity. Thomas optimized his podcast growth too far by morphing conversations and chopping episodes, making it not fun anymore.

25:04

🥳 Lesson 6 - Recognize dream moments

<paragraph6> encourages appreciating and consciously acknowledging when you are living dream moments your past self could only wish for. Thomas did not feel his Good Morning America TV interview due to anxiety.

Keywords

💡Headspace

Headspace refers to mental space or capacity to think clearly. The video emphasizes the importance of preserving headspace rather than cramming one's schedule and mind with too many commitments. This can improve creativity, productivity, prevent burnout, and lead to greater life balance and happiness. Examples from the script include the narrator struggling with burnout and lack of excitement while promoting his book, until the book's publication freed up mental headspace.

💡Constraints

Constraints refers to self-defined limits and boundaries around one's work and personal life. The video argues that consciously choosing constraints, rather than allowing work to dominate life, can enhance happiness, prevent burnout, and improve focus on high-impact tasks. Examples include only working set hours per week, or structuring work around family commitments.

💡Last Man Standing

This refers to persisting the longest at an endeavor as a strategy for eventual success. Quitting prematurely is the biggest threat to long-term victory. Most value is created in the later stages of a project. Examples from the script argue that the narrator should have known this would apply to his long-term success on YouTube.

💡Fun

The video cautions against optimizing efficiency to the point where an activity stops being intrinsically enjoyable. Maximizing fun ensures intrinsic motivation to persist at something. The narrator optimized the fun out of his podcast through excessive growth hacking. Having fun is linked to lasting the longest at an endeavor.

💡Dream Moments

Dream moments refer to instances where one gets to live or experience something they previously only dreamed of. The video argues that we often fail to appreciate these moments and slip into anxiety or planning future steps. Consciously recognizing dream moments helps us enjoy life's journey. Examples include being interviewed on TV to promote his book.

💡Journey vs. Destination

This key duality contrasts the process of working towards a goal versus achieving the goal itself. The video argues that nearly all happiness and meaning is derived from the journey, not the destination. Hitting a goal brings only momentary happiness. This is why enjoying the process matters more. Examples include feeling indifferent after his book became a bestseller.

💡Play

Play refers to approaching tasks with a spirit of ease, fun and intrinsic enjoyment rather than straining intensity. The video praises play as an underrated productivity technique that boosts creativity while preventing burnout. The headspace meditation app includes guidance on accessing this mindset.

💡Balance

Balance refers to maintaining equilibrium between different domains of life ??? work, family, health, recreation, creativity etc. Lack of balance was linked to the narrator's burnout, whereas conscious boundaries create space for rich non-work experiences.

💡Stoicism

Stoicism is a philosophy stressing virtue, wisdom, inner tranquility and non-attachment to external outcomes you can't control. It's referenced positively as an ideal mindset if the narrator's book hadn't reached bestseller status.

💡Sustainability

Sustainability means persisting consistently at a pace aligned with one's energy and resources. Living sustainably prevents burnout. The narrator advises creators to build sustainable businesses aligned with their ideal lifestyle through conscious constraints.

Highlights

Don't underestimate the value of headspace

Wake up an hour earlier and do the thing you struggle with

Choose the constraints of your life and optimize within them

Last Man Standing is an ignored success strategy

Be wary of optimizing the fun out of what you're doing

Recognize dream moments when they happen

Destinations don't bring happiness, only the journey does

Headspace takes mental capacity even if not much time

Working out early builds better habits and energy

Define life constraints then optimize work within them

Staying power beats optimization for business success

Over-optimization sucks joy out of things

Appreciate when you're living previous dreams

Goals bring relief, not happiness; enjoy the process

No achievement will make you happier than now

Transcripts

hey friends welcome back to the channel

so over the last 6 months I have learned

a handful of life lessons that I really

wish I'd known earlier and in this video

I want to share them with you so here

are seven life lessons I wish i' known

earlier lesson number one that I wish

I'd known sooner is don't underestimate

the value of headspace I already learned

this over the last 6 months or so uh as

you guys might know I have been writing

a book which is now published it's

called Feelgood productivity and the

last 6 months have been a battle towards

marketing and publicity and trying to

drive pre-orders and trying to get on

all these podcast car so that we can get

sales and stuff and you know it's very

exciting but we did in fact hit the New

York Times and the Sunday Times

bestseller lists and so my own goal for

the book was sort of achieved alongside

my actual goal which was to write a book

I'm proud of I definitely did write a

book that I'm proud of but one thing I

really found was I'd look at my calendar

and I would seem to have time to do

stuff and in that time I was like cool

you know I'm I'm a productivity Beast I

you know like to batch things I like to

schedule things I'd be scheduling all

these things in like trying to film all

these videos and do all these podcasts

and do all this traveling cuz at the

time I was and still am to an extent

like doing some dig noad traveling

around the world stuff but I was really

finding that like wow uh I'm I'm feeling

kind of burned out by this whole thing

and by burned out I mean that I was

feeling a sense of apathy a a sense that

it was all meaningless what was the

point of this stuff anyway and whenever

I have that sort of feeling I know that

that is a sign of burnout because

apparently especially in men burnout

tends to manifest like that whereas in

women on average uh burnout tends to

manifest as this sort of feeling of uh

emotional overwhelm or this feeling of

being drained of energy whereas in men

on average apparently tends to manifest

more it's like this feeling that the

thing that I'm doing is not particularly

meaningful or something anyway so I

started having that feeling and around

that time I did a life update video on

the channel where I was talking about

kind of taking a step back from the

business and only making videos when I

felt like it and not bothering with

sponsorships and things like that and

then December 28th came around and the

book was published and then on the 4th

of January we found out that it hit the

New York Times bestseller list and it

was like this enormous weight had just

been lifted off my head and suddenly I

had all this headspace that was free and

it was weird because you know I knew

that I'd been using up a lot of heads

space in writing the book but I hadn't

realized how much headspace it was

taking thinking about and working on

marketing the book cuz it didn't seem to

be taking that much time it was just

taking a lot of headp space and since

then since like this massive like weight

has has been relieved from my from my

brain I really started feeling more of a

sense of excitement more of a sense of

Joy more of a sense of kind of drive and

ambition to like grow the business and

make more videos and do cool stuff

because now it's not like there's this

like big ass thing that's sort of

Weighing on me and it's just the value

of headspace and I realized that I had

something similar a few years ago I was

running a business and then I sold the

business and the business like running

the business wasn't taking up that much

time but it was taking up a lot of head

space and then as like basically the day

I sold the business um suddenly all that

heads space freed up and I was able to

suddenly devote more time and attention

to Growing the YouTube channel and

growing the business around it and at

various other points in my life I've

I've learned this lesson that there's

value in a headp space and I I I just

keep on forgetting that this is an

important lesson I keep on just taking

on more projects and more things and I

keep on thinking like well you know like

right now I only really have one primary

goal for the business which is to do

this thing that we're calling

productivity lab there's a waiting list

down below if you want to check it out

it's like a productivity Community type

thing but I don't really have any other

major goals for the business and the

Temptation is there to keep adding those

goals in to really ram my calendar full

of stuff to ram my brain full of stuff

to feel as if I'm making progress but

something that I've really learned over

time is the value of focusing on just

one thing at a time and it's Al it's

totally okay to have head space it's

totally okay to leave breathing room in

your life for a focusing on that one

thing B having a balanced life c not

burning out for being able to take

breaks and stuff and with this whole

like productivity Guru kind of energy

that I've got going on a lot of the time

I'm always like yeah but I really want

to do this and this and this and this

and all these things are exciting and I

want to do them but a lesson I need to

keep reminding myself of is that no

headp space is valuable it's okay to not

fill your calendar with just all the

things I won't be like a failure or a

commercial failure or like an economic

failure or something by just not filling

my calendar with all the instead

there is value in heads space and

there's value in focus and there's value

in just focusing on one thing at a time

rather than trying to do eight things in

parallel this is really a lesson that I

wish hadd learn a lot earlier and there

is a quote that sort of encapsulates

this to an extent which is that you can

have anything you want but not

everything you want and I think think in

life and in work you know if you watch

this channel you are probably ambitious

and somewhat entrepreneurial and

probably very good-looking uh for people

like us we have this desire to take on

too much because it's like fun and

seems cool and we want to get ahead and

stuff there is incredible value in Focus

incredible value in prioritizing the

headspace and not just filling our

calendar and our minds with the projects

that we want to work on all right now

speaking of headspace and this is a

total coincidence this video actually

happens to be sponsored by headspace

headspace is an absolutely amazing

meditation app that can help you build a

daily meditation practice which is a

fantastic thing of getting some more

headp space in your life and I've

personally been working my way through

the introductory course to try and build

meditation into a habit in my life as

well they've got different voices that

you can use to guide you through the

meditations and my personal favorite

time of doing meditations is actually

just before bed has a great way of

winding down kind of unloading the

stress of the day so that I can have a

more calm sleep very excitingly as well

as part of the launch for my book feel

good productivity I have collaborated

with headspace and there is now a

Feelgood productivity collection on the

app itself which can help you on the

path to building healthy habits to boost

your productivity and efficiency but in

a way that's actually enjoyable and

meaningful and sustainable some of my

favorite bits in this collection are all

about the value of play play is the

first chapter of my book it talks about

how play is the most underrated

productivity technique out there and as

part of the headspace collection there

are a few like lectures and videos kind

of explaining this concept around how

actually approaching your work with

lightness and ease more in the spirit of

play rather than in the spirit of work

can actually help you maximize your

creativity and your productivity but in

a way that reduces stress and reduces

the chances of burnout if you want to

see how headspace might be helpful for

you and check out the Feelgood

productivity collection you can try it

out completely for free for 60 days all

you have to do is sign up with my link

in the video description or scan the QR

code that is on screen right now and

that will give you a totally free 60-day

trial so thank you so much to headspace

for sponsoring the video and let's get

back to it all right now we come to

lesson number two which is what I really

wish I'd known earlier is it is a very

good thing to wake up an hour earlier

and do the thing that you find hard or

do the thing that you struggle with now

I have long struggled to make working

out regularly a habit you know I've been

working with a Fitness coach called Dan

go he's amazing YouTube channel link

down below if you want to check it out

and Dan has constantly been saying to me

you know it seems like you're not

getting these workouts in have you

considered doing them in the mornings

and I was always like no Dan like the

mornings are my Creative Energy and like

you know I I really like having a

leisurely start to the morning and being

able to faf around and being able to

have three cups of coffee and then go to

the toilet twice and then do some

reading and then like get to work I was

like okay man but one thing I'm telling

you like you know anytime I coach

someone who struggles to work out I

recommend doing it in the morning and it

works so when in in January when I ran

my annual planning session for 12,000

people who attended um one of the goals

I set for myself for the year in health

was to get into the best shape of my

life and I realized that in order to do

that I needed to work out more

consistently and so I thought you know

what I'm going to take Dan's advice and

I'm going to do it in the mornings I was

also very inspired by my friend s Bloom

who has a YouTube channel that he's just

started where he does a cold plunge

literally at 4:00 every single morning

it's just freaking absurd but just

seeing him also seeing like videos of

him like dunking in this like cold tub

and then going for a run for like you

know a slow run for like 12 mil and then

doing a high-intensity training session

all before 7:00 a.m. I was like wo okay

hm this is what it looks like and so I

decided to start working out in the

mornings and four times a week for the

last 5 weeks I have worked out in the

mornings either at 8:00 a.m. or at 7:00

a.m. with a personal trainer at my local

gym and it has been absolutely

gamechanging I have never been so

consistent with working out I have never

felt more energized I've never felt more

productive I've never been more

productive in terms of my business I've

filmed more YouTube videos in the last

like 3 weeks than I have in the last

like 4 months and there is profound

value in kind of as Brian Tracy says

eating that frog first thing in the

morning this seems obvious this is the

advice that everyone says just you know

do the hot thing in the morning like

wake up a little bit earlier go to sleep

a little bit earlier and like do the

thing you struggle with but it's advice

that I really have not taken up until

now and now I'm like oh damn I really

wish I'd known this advice earlier I've

always struggled working out I could

have just done it in the morning and it

sort of depends on what the thing is

that you're struggling with I think you

know back in the day if I had a real job

and was really struggling to make videos

consistently or work on my business

consistently I should have woken up I

would have woken up an hour earlier to

do that stuff do the hard thing in the

morning the thing that you wouldn't

otherwise do it's just been absolutely

transformative for my energy levels and

for my health and I'm getting more Hench

and it's like like all the good things

are happening and also the nice thing

about wake having to wake up at 7:30 to

then go to the gym or like 6:30 on some

days to go to the gym is that it then

kind of forces me to sleep earlier as

well cuz I know that oh you know I want

to get at least 8 hours of sleep cuz I

want to I don't want to find I I don't

want to have a grim workout the next day

and so what this means is that when it

gets to like 9:00 p.m. I'm like all

right cool I should really think about

winding down if I'm out at dinner with

friends I'll look at my watch be like

okay cool I should ready leave here by

like 9:45 to take the train home to get

there on time and if I'm at home then it

means that I'll just be less likely to

faf around on my phone and on the

computer watching random Youtube videos

cuz I know that I want to get to sleep

and I know I want 8 hours of sleep and

so like again people have figured this

out that if you sleep early and wake up

early you can just be very productive in

the mornings but for some reason to date

I have not taken that advice and it's

just been absolutely game changing over

the last like four or five weeks all

right lesson number three that I wish

I'd known earlier is to choose the

constraints of your life and then

optimize your work within those

constraints so what do I mean by this

basically this is from a conversation I

had with James CLA the author of atomic

habits who very kindly hopped on a Zoom

call with me a few months ago to give me

advice on like book marketing and stuff

super nice of him great guy and I asked

him hey James man you know why aren't

you launching the atomic habits Academy

or like this online course you could be

making more money with this and this and

you know this like why why aren't you

doing it and what James clar said was

what I've realized is that the thing

that works for me is to draw a box

around the life that I want and then

optimize my work within that box so he's

got kids so for him the box is I want to

drop the kids off to school in the

morning at like 10:00 I want to pick

them up from school at like I don't know

2:30 and I want to be there for the kids

and be like a really present dad which

is amazing and so he's like within those

4 hours I'm like cool let's let's work

on the thing that's most important which

is right now his next book very exciting

and outside of that he does like one or

two speaking gigs every month and that

just makes a load of money as well and

he could do more but if he did more it

would take him away from his family so

that's not the point like you know James

Clear obviously ridiculously successful

author multi- decamillionaire from all

the copies of atomic habits that he sold

he also knows other authors who are very

rich and very famous and I ask like what

is the thing that the happy ones have in

common right because we often hear about

people or meet people who are very

successful but who are not happy and so

it's like the goal really is to be

financially successful and also really

happy and he said that the ones who are

happiest are the ones who draw the

constraints around the life they have on

around the life they want and optimize

their work within that and I think

that's great because so far what I've

done a lot in my life is for my life to

be subordinate to my work and to not

really care about like work life balance

and to not really care about I don't

know spending time with friends and

things I think I'm pretty good at

spending time with my friends but like

even just having head space to the

previous Point even just having the

space to have a chill evening by myself

so that I can sort my life out and do

the LA and do the admin like I ram my

schedule full of so much stuff mostly

either social related or more likely

work related that I don't have time for

those things and they can lead to life

feeling quite frantic and stressful at

times and I think that was a method of

operation that was good at an earlier

stage of my life when I was hustling to

try and get the business off the ground

while working a full-time job and all

that kind of stuff I think it's totally

okay to have like strategic imbalance in

certain seasons of life but now I'm in a

season of life where I really recognize

that there is no further happiness to be

gained from more work rated achievements

and in fact the happiness and meaning in

life will come from the more life

Associated I guess achievements but like

processes spending time with friends

family getting married having kids all

that kind of stuff the stuff that David

Brooks would call the second Mountain

rather than the first mountain of

material success so I wouldn't quite say

it's a lesson I wish I'd known earlier

cuz I sort of had this idea that like

you know it's okay to not be so work

life balancy when I'm like 24 and

hustling to get my YouTube channel off

the ground but it is something that I

want to take a lot more seriously moving

forward defining the constraints I would

like to operate within and then

optimizing my work around that and I

found myself giving this advice to a lot

of entrepreneurs now who want to build

lifestyle businesses lifestyle business

being a business that supports your life

rather than the other way around and I

find myself asking you know what's the

goal and what are the constraints

because the problem with

entrepreneurship is that you can find

yourself just working all the time and

feeling really guilty if you're not

working all the time and then burning

yourself out because you're not working

all the time and you go to bed thinking

I should have done more and you you're

on the weekends hustling away because

you think I should have done more and if

you love that and if you're building a

life you love and you you genuinely

filled with energy every minute of the

day great you do you but I speak to a

lot of entrepreneurs especially creators

who are are doing that and who are

really burnt out and who are on the

verge of quitting their businesses or

quitting their YouTube channels because

they're so burned out by this approach

and the advice I found myself giving is

around really defining these constraints

like how many hours per week would you

actually like to work what would you

like your hours of work to be how many

holidays would you like to take because

if you're struggling with burnout then

generally burnout is a mismatch between

the demands of a job or the thing you're

doing and the resources you have

available for the thing whether it's

time or energy or like people whatever

and a huge thing around this whole

Creator burnout stuff is just the fact

that it's it's it's unconstrained you

could be thinking about your YouTube

channel and your business like every

single waking hour of the day and even

when you're asleep and that's just a

complete recipe for Burnout whereas

being able to define the constraints to

know that no I actually only want to

work 30 hours a week or 40 hours a week

or 20 hours a week like defining that

constraint actually forces you to

prioritize it forces you to only do

things that are actually going to move

the needle whereas what a lot of

creators do and certainly what I did

when I first became a full-time YouTuber

is you spend a lot of time doing

that does not need to be done because

you have not defined the constraints

it's Parkinson's law and action work

expands to fill the time we allocate to

it and if we allocate like 100% of our

time to work work because we haven't

thought about the constraints we'll end

up faffing around and doing Pointless

Stuff in that time whereas you know a

thought experiment that I really like is

if you were only allowed to spend 2

hours a week doing your business or

doing your job what would you do in

those two hours and that gives you a

pretty good sense of what are the most

inle moving things and the question is

well why aren't you spending 10 hours

just doing those things that you would

do in those two hours for example

generally those sorts of questions at

least for me and the people that I kind

of Coach casually about this stuff tend

to lead to breakthroughs in their

business and their life by the way um

one thing that I love to do is to

collect journaling prompts journaling

has been the single well one of the

single most gamechanging things in my

life in terms of just leveling up my

entire business and my my personal life

as well and there is a link down below

to my completely free journaling Hub

where anytime I collect an interesting

journaling prompt it just goes into that

it's an ocean page uh that you can just

check out that has a bunch of like

prompts and things and templates and

stuff it's completely free link down

below if you enjoy journaling as much as

I do all right lesson number four that I

wish I'd known sooner cuz it would have

saved me a lot of heartache and headache

is that the success strategy that

everyone ignores is Last Man Standing

Last Man Standing is a totally viable

strategy now I actually picked this up

very recently um last week I had lunch

with a chap called Anor waraku who is an

Indian YouTuber entrepreneur Creator

author he's super cool he's like in his

40s he's run a bunch of companies before

sold a bunch of businesses used to be a

CEO of like a company managing hundreds

of employees so he's like a professional

business person like a CEO who has then

become a Creator and we had like a three

and a half hour long long lunch where I

took so many notes in my little pocket

notebook where I was just asking him

loads of questions around how he

approaches his like YouTube channel and

his media business as a business rather

than as a creator of swords and one of

the things that he said really stuck

with me which is that you know in his

like 20 plus years of running businesses

what he's seen is that the last man

standing is often the winner you know in

a business the only reason a business

fails is if the founders quit the only

reason a YouTube channel fails is if the

Creator quits Peter teal often like has

this phrase which is something like by

far the majority of the value of a

business is generated 10 plus years

after the business was first founded 10

plus years and so you know startups and

businesses and stuff are often

optimizing for growth when actually they

probably should be optimizing for

durability and sustainability because if

you can be the last man standing you are

way more likely to win by whatever

metrics you deem meaningful in terms of

Victory and I wish I'd known this sooner

I always had a sense of this when I

started my YouTube channel 7 years ago I

knew that I needed to do it for at least

2 years and I knew that interesting

things would happen but I didn't know

what those things would be I knew look I

just need to make one or two videos a

week and I'm sure something good will

happen but throughout that journey and

even like in the last seven years I've

often had periods of like uncertainty

periods of Doubt periods of anxiety like

oh our videos are doing badly this month

what if the channel dies and all this

sort of stuff and what I really wish is

just having someone with experience

who's older than me just telling me bro

the only thing that will make you fail

is if you quit just keep on going like

you burning out and quitting is by far

the biggest risk to the business don't

worry about it the channel will have ups

and downs the growth and the money will

have ups and downs as long as you can

weather the ups and downs and just keep

going you will end up in a really really

really freaking cool place and it's a

lesson that again I wish I could tell to

a lot of other creators cuz a lot of

creat need to hear it a lot of

entrepreneurs need to hear it it's so

easy to get fixated on the ups and downs

of the algorithm and like what's

happening right now and what's happening

this week I find myself thinking that

when I look at our kind of internal

company scorecard with like the numbers

and the metrics and stuff and I'm like

oh no like our LinkedIn reach has gone

down this week what are we going to

do and then I give myself a bit of

perspective I'm like who cares it's just

a week we're planning to do this for the

next 30 Years who gives a about the

performance of like a piece of content

in a given week the goal is to keep on

playing the game and by just keeping on

going that is the thing that's going to

make you successful however you deem

success and it relates to this idea

around finite and infinite games which

I've talked about before on the channel

and that you you may be familiar with

certain games are finite games certain

games are infinite games a finite game

is a game that's played to be one with a

clear score and a clear Like rules

Victory but an infinite game is a game

where the objective is to continue

playing the game and so for me for my

YouTube channel and for this business

and for writing books and everything the

goal is durability the goal is to just

be the last man standing and not in a

sense of like gladiatorial competition

because I also don't think of

competitors as like competition or

anything like that you know one thing

that an said over the lunch he was like

you know during the pandemic especially

people on podcast and stuff were asking

him hey man like how do you feel about

all these people starting YouTube

channels and starting businesses and

starting Instagram accounts and trying

to compete with you he was like don't

really care 99% of them are going to

quit before they see any real traction

and and for the ones that don't like I

actually don't care what the competitors

are doing my job is to run my own race

and to just keep showing up and I'm

planning to do that forever and I think

that's such a nice strategy Last Man

Standing my job is to simply just show

up and do this forever and as long as

I'm doing it forever good things will

keep continuing to happen and I don't

need to stress so much about what's

happening day by day what's happening

week by week what's happening month by

month or even what's happening on an

annual basis relates to something that

Morgan hle talks about in the psychology

of money great book we've got a video

about it linked up there or over here

which is that the way you become rich in

the world of like investing is by just

being in the game for longer than

everyone else like Warren Buffett has

been investing since the age of 13 he's

now like 95 he's been doing it for 80

years and 99% of his money has come in

the last like 10 years or something

absurd like that there is incredible

value in just being in the game for a

very long time and so this is why they

say that the first rule of investing is

don't lose money and the second rule of

investing is C rule number one because

is losing money and your bank balance

going to zero and your Investments going

to zero is going to take you out of the

game you can no longer play the game

which is why things like crypto and

stuff putting all your money in crypto

is probably a bad idea cuz it's kind of

high risk but as long as you can stay in

the game for a sufficiently long period

of time that is when you experience all

the comprehend and growth that's when

everything becomes successful so last

man standing is the success strategy

that everyone ignores all right life

lesson number five that I wish had known

sooner is be wary of optimizing the fun

out of the game that you're playing you

know I got this from one of these like

video game review YouTube channels I

can't remember which one and they do

like long video essay about games like

Elden ring and Skyrim and like World of

Warcraft and just like video essays

exploring the world of video games I

don't play very many video games but I

do enjoy the world so I watch a lot of

videos about video games weirdly and

this Creator said a quote from a game

designer and the quote was something to

the effect of left unchecked players

will optimize the fun out of the game

they're playing Left unchecked players

will optimize the fun out of the game

they're playing I loved that quote and

it really resonated with me firstly on a

video game perspective because I used to

play World of Warcraft back in the day

and I did optimize the fun out of it I

was doing a lot of grinding a lot of

like min-maxing to get my character My

Level 80 warlock up to a like sufficient

standard to be able to take down the

freaking Lich King and stuff and it was

fun but I'm not sure how how fun it

really was it's like doing the grinding

and doing sort of the same Quest again

and again and again just to get a very

slightly different gear upgrade so that

you've got slightly more damage per

second like in a way that's at risk of

optimizing the fun out of the game and

so a lot of video game designers have to

be really mindful to not allow Gamers to

optimize the fun out of the game they're

playing because they just will and I

think this applies to all of us

ambitious type people you know even

though I love I I love productivity and

optimization and stuff there's always a

risk that you can optimize too far and

you optimize to the point that the thing

no longer is fun and I really noticed

this with my podcast so I've been

running a podcast for the last two and a

half years it's called Deep dive there's

a link down below if you want to check

it out and the Channel's been doing

really well the podcast's been doing

really well like every month we keep on

hitting new viewer records and

everything and I realized over the last

few months that I'd actually optimized

the fun out of it uh because initially

the podcast started off as a hobby where

I was like oh I just want to interview

cool people and have conversations with

them and slowly we started optimizing

more and more and more and slowly we

started to kind of research guest that

in detail ahead of time like book guests

based on who's got a new book book

guests based on who would get lots of

views I would be morphing the

conversation to the one that I thought

the audience wanted to hear rather than

the conversation I wanted to have we'd

be like chopping things around just for

retention and all of these things are

very sensible things to do if you want

to grow a podcast but in my case they

optimized the fun out of it and then I

just didn't want to do the podcast

anymore so you know I made a whole video

about this on the podcast Channel what

I've decided to do with the podcast is

to sort of dial down the optimization

dial and deliberately de optimize the

podcast I still have a podcast I still

want to do interviews but I don't want

to do them on my own terms I don't

really care about making money from them

I don't really care about having

sponsors that like require deadlines I

don't really care about having an upload

schedule in that era of my life in

business the podcast decided to actively

de optimize and so it's a lesson that I

I do wish I'd known earlier I wish I'd

kept more of a check on like for

everything that I'm doing just making

sure that I'm not at risk of optimizing

the fun out of it you know if I wanted

to grow this YouTube channel I would

probably script every video word for

word right because IR retention because

like valuing the audience's time and

stuff and I probably spend 18 hours

writing a script like some of my

YouTuber friends do or 50 hours or 70

hours and that would be more optimal but

I've tried it and it's not fun it might

be fun for some YouTubers but it's not

fun for me to write a word for word

script and then read it off a

teleprompter I much prefer to have a few

bullet points and then speak from the

heart because it's more fun it's less

optimal but it's more fun similarly you

know when I was at University studying

with friends around me was less optimal

because I'm get getting a little bit

distracted but it was more fun way more

fun than working in my room on my own

and so it's a lesson that I keep coming

back to be wary of optimizing the fun

out of what you're doing there is a

certain level of optimization that is

like good and beyond that if the thing

becomes not fun you are far more likely

to burn out and just not and just quit

at the thing which is directly in a

contradiction to our previous point

which is that last man standing is a

viable strategy you can't be the last

man standing if you're not having fun

you cannot do something consistently for

long enough if you're not having fun

with it if you don't enjoy making

YouTube videos you are not going to be a

YouTuber for long enough to see it

succeed if you don't enjoy running your

business if you don't enjoy your job

you're not going to be able to stick at

the thing long enough to see any

meaningful results which is why be very

wary of optimizing the fun out of the

thing that you're doing lesson number

six is to recognize dream moments when

they arise so a dream moment is a moment

that your previous self that our

previous self would have dreamed about

and and now we're living that moment and

I really noticed this when I was doing

promo for my book um I think on early in

January I happened to be interviewed on

Good Morning America uh which is a

massive TV show in the US and it was

like a 3 minute long interview but like

throughout the whole interview I just

found myself like in my head and being

super anxious and trying to plan out

what I was saying and what I was saying

and then the guy George Stephanopoulos

like threw me a question I wasn't

prepared for and I was like oh like

I'm just in my head for the whole thing

and it was only in the taxi on the way

home on the way back to the hotel and I

realized I didn't really experience the

experience of being interviewed on

national TV I didn't really feel the

experience cuz I was I was in my head

the whole time I had failed to recognize

that this is a moment that my previous

self would have dreamed about like the

thought of being on national TV talking

about a book that I've written like what

the hell like that's wow that's so cool

but in the moment I didn't think oh my

God this is so cool I need to enjoy it I

was just in my head I was just trying to

optimize I was just trying to focus on

like making sure I didn't say the wrong

things and didn't come across like an

idiot and all that jazz and it's really

it's really got me thinking like how

many other moments are there in the day

where we're doing a thing that a

previous version of us would have only

dreamed about doing um anytime I get

into my Tesla Model 3 I remind myself

these days that this actually is my

dream car I bought it in 2020 thanks to

making money from my YouTube channel

thank you guys um and this is my dream

car that's really cool and I just spend

like four or 5 Seconds when I sit in the

seat that has been preheated just like

reminding myself of

that anytime I fly business class these

days I go on the plane I turn left

rather than right and I'm like hm nice

high five passed me we made it we you

know we smashed it we're here we're

flying business class we never would

have imagined this would be possible but

here we are doing this thing but then

also I've started noticing what are the

dream moments outside of like

materialistic desires like a Tesla and a

business class flight what are the

moments where I'm am connecting with an

entrepreneur or an author who I've

really admired and I'm having lunch with

them and I'm like that's super cool

like I never would have thought that I'd

ever be having lunch with Dereck cers or

with Ryan holiday or with like Noah

Kagan or people like that that's super

cool when I have meetings with my team

or like a team social where you know I

see sort of VI to 15 people who I've

hired and been able to convince to join

me on this adventure who are literally

giving their best years to helping me

grow my business and help helping our

students and our customers have an

amazing time in our YouTuber Academy and

helping me with my YouTube channel how

cool is that like it's such a struggle

to recognize these moments when they're

there because it's so easy to be fixated

on like the next thing and the next goal

and like oh what's the next thing on the

calendar what's the next thing I'm

working towards and to sort of forget

that actually if you had told me a few

years ago that I'd end up with a team of

like 15 people who I really Vibe with

and who are amazing and who's just

hanging out with is really fun and we're

all working together on the business and

they're doing the stuff that I don't

like doing so that 100% of what I'm

doing is the stuff that I really enjoy

how freaking cool is that that's sick I

just I just don't remind myself of that

often enough when it's happening I was

giving a talk at Cambridge a few weeks

ago and I was saying this to the

students that like you know right now

you're all sitting here as medical

students at Cambridge University this is

a dream moment for you you are literally

living the dream like your previous self

would have only dreamed about being a

medical student at Cambridge University

so it's worth in the midst of your all

the exams and all the stress and all the

angst and all the complaining worth

taking a few seconds to just remember

hang on I'm living my dream life right

now I'm literally living the dream my

previous self would have only dreamed

about this moment and here I am living

it let's take a few seconds to

appreciate it let's give a virtual high

five to our previous self and let's not

forget to enjoy the moment by taking it

too seriously and the final lesson that

I keep on needing to remind myself of

again that I wish i' known earlier is

that destinations do not bring any

happiness only the journey does and I

really had this feeling like profoundly

when I got the call from my editor

saying that we had hit the New York

Times bestseller list for my book

Feelgood productivity link down below if

you want to check it out um we hit the

New York Times list and this was a goal

I've been working towards for like years

as soon as I started writing the book in

2020 in the back of my mind was the idea

oh it' be really cool to hit the New

York Times best seller list I try not to

think about it too hard because I knew

was goal outside of my control and y ya

but it was definitely a goal that I had

and I spoke to Mark Manson and Ryan

holiday who are both very successful

authors about this and they were like

yeah you you know it's your first book

you're going to have it as a goal and

then maybe you'll hit the list maybe you

won't but when you do hit the list

you'll realize it's like broadly

meaningless and so I was prepared for

this and so I was very intrigued I was

like if we don't hit the list it'll be a

good exercise in stoicism and if we do

hit the list it'll be interesting to see

how happy I feel and I got the call

saying we'd hit the you know I was a New

York Times bestselling author which I

can now put on my Instagram bio for the

rest of my life and all I felt was just

a wave of relief a wave of relief that

like thank God for that like the hard

work that we put in is paid off all the

money and time we spent in marketing is

paid off nice and that relief lasted

maybe a couple of hours and then I had

dinner with some friends and kind of

forgot about it and everyone's been

saying oh you know you should celebrate

the wins and stuff I like yeah cool yeah

I'm I'm all for celebrating the wins but

it really has not made me any happier

it's not really changed anything about

my life it's just like it's a arbitrary

goal that I was working towards that I

hit and I'm just like right cool that's

fine and I think especially earlier on

in my entrepreneur career and especially

when I was at University as well trying

to build a business for the first time I

had B into the arrival fallacy this is a

psychological construct that's like when

we arrive in a particular destination

that then things will be different that

then we will be happy and it's a fallacy

because it's just not true like you know

anytime we accomplish something that

we've been working towards the joy of

that moment lasts a heartbeat compared

to the journey that it took to get there

and so it's cliche but like the journey

really is the destination um happiness

and meaning is found in the Journey of

doing the thing rather than in achieving

the thing and there was another quote

that a friend of mine said I don't know

where he got it from but he basically

said that there is no achievement you

could possibly achieve that will make

you any happier than you are right now

and it's so true I find myself saying it

to other people as well like there is no

achievement you could possibly achieve

that would make you any happier than you

are right now probably I think that's

nice it's reassuring it means that we

can be less attached Less fixated on the

outcomes I know it's useful to set goals

cuz then we have a direction in mind but

at the same time to be unattached from

that outcome and to focus on enjoying

the journey and again it speaks to that

point around dream moments speaks to

that point around Last Man Standing if

you can find a way to enjoy the journey

then you can work towards ambitious

goals for sure but you won't be

disappointed when you hit the goal

because you know that hitting the goal

is not going to actually lead to any

happiness you know that all of the

happiness is found in the journey it's a

lesson that actually my editor and agent

had to remind me of many times in the

process of writing my book CU many times

during that process I started to Veer

towards taking it too seriously

seriously with a capital S putting too

much importance with a capital I on it

thinking oh my God this needs to be

really good if it's not really good

people are going to review it badly and

oh my God it's going to be terrible and

then all that kind of stuff the tendency

we have to spiral into these negative

thought patterns and sometimes my editor

or my agent would say you know OE isn't

one of the tactics in the in the book to

be sincere rather than serious do you

think you're at risk of taking this too

seriously and I'd be like yeah you're

right I am at risk of taking this too

seriously let me just dial down the

seriousness let me dial down the

importance and we can always choose to

do that you know making videos feels

like a serious thing oh my God like

potentially lots of people could see

this video but it's not that serious at

the end of the day who cares lightness

and ease there's never anything to worry

about because everything will work out

fine it's the journey that matters not

the destination find a way to enjoy the

process all of that fun stuff having

said that of course there is no Journey

without a destination and one major

issue a lot of people have is the sense

of feeling lost and feeling

directionless and feeling like you don't

really know what you're doing because

you're in a bit of a transitionary stage

in your life if you are in that position

at all then you're going to absolutely

love my three-part video series which is

over there around why you feel lost in

life and what to do about it I've had so

many comments from people saying that

that video Series has just changed their

approach to life so if you go through it

and do the exercises I think you I hope

you'll get some value out of it so check

out that series over there so thank you

very much for watching and see you later