Sainani SciWrite 1.3

Summary

The video script discusses principles of effective scientific writing, using an example from a top biology journal. It critiques the use of nouns instead of verbs, vague language, unnecessary jargon, and acronyms that slow down the reader. The speaker emphasizes the importance of clarity, active voice, and strong verbs to improve readability. The script provides a rewritten version of a complex sentence for clarity and introduces upcoming topics like cutting clutter and using active voice.

Takeaways

• 📚 The script discusses principles of effective writing in scientific literature, specifically targeting issues found in a Cell journal article.
• 🏃 The use of nouns instead of verbs can slow down the reader's comprehension, as verbs make sentences more dynamic.
• 🌟 Vague words like 'physiologic' and 'molecular species' can hinder the reader's ability to form a clear mental image.
• 🚫 Unnecessary jargon and acronyms, such as 'gliomagenesis' and 'MIR' for micro RNA, can disrupt the reader's flow and understanding.
• 🔄 The author encourages avoiding acronyms except for the most standard ones to enhance readability.
• 🗣️ The passive voice can make sentences difficult to read, contrasting with the more natural active voice.
• ✏️ The distance between the subject and the main verb should be minimized to maintain the reader's focus.
• ✂️ The script emphasizes the importance of cutting unnecessary words and phrases to reduce clutter.
• 📈 The rewritten example provided in the script demonstrates how simplifying language can improve clarity.
• 📅 Upcoming discussions will focus on the active voice, using strong verbs, and keeping the subject and main verb close together.

Q & A

What is the main issue the speaker has with the example taken from the journal Cell?

The speaker struggles with the example because it is difficult to read and understand what the authors intended to say due to the use of nouns instead of verbs, vague words, unnecessary jargon, and acronyms.

Why does the speaker suggest using verbs instead of nouns in scientific writing?

Verbs move sentences along and make them more engaging, while nouns can slow the reader down. Using verbs like 'dis-regulate', 'initiate', 'progress', and 'express' instead of their noun forms makes the writing more dynamic and easier to follow.

What is the problem with using vague words in scientific writing according to the speaker?

Vague words do not provide a clear picture in the reader's mind, making it difficult for them to understand the author's point. Words like 'physiologic' and 'molecular species' are too broad and do not add much to the clarity of the writing.

Why does the speaker criticize the use of the acronym MIR for micro RNA?

The speaker criticizes the use of MIR as an acronym because it is an acronym of an acronym, which can be confusing. Additionally, acronyms can halt the reader's progress as they may need to look up what the acronym stands for, especially if it is not a standard one.

What is the impact of using passive voice in scientific writing as discussed in the script?

Using passive voice can make sentences difficult to read because it inverts the natural English sentence structure of subject-verb-object. The speaker mentions that the passive voice is awkward and will be discussed in more detail in the following week.

How does the speaker suggest rewriting the difficult sentence from the Cell journal?

The speaker suggests rewriting the sentence to be more straightforward and easier to understand by using active voice and clear language. The revised sentence is: 'Changes in micro RNA expression play a role in cancer including Glioma. Therefore, events that disrupt micro RNAs from binding to their target RNAs may also promote cancer.'

What is the first principle of effective writing that the speaker plans to discuss?

The first principle of effective writing the speaker plans to discuss is learning to cut unnecessary words and phrases to eliminate clutter.

What are the other principles of effective writing that will be covered in the following week?

The other principles of effective writing to be covered include using the active voice instead of the passive voice and writing with strong verbs, avoiding turning verbs into nouns, and not burying the main verb.

Why is the use of jargon and acronyms discouraged in the script?

The use of jargon and acronyms is discouraged because they can halt the reader's progress and comprehension. Unless the acronym is very standard and familiar to everyone, most readers will not know it and will have to stop to figure it out.

What is the impact factor of the journal Cell mentioned in the script?

The impact factor of the journal Cell mentioned in the script is approximately 32.

What does the speaker mean by 'burying the main verb' in a sentence?

The speaker refers to the issue where the main verb of a sentence is placed too far from the subject, causing the reader to wait for the verb and making the sentence difficult to follow.

Outlines

00:00

📚 Effective Writing Principles

The speaker introduces the topic of effective writing in scientific literature, using an example from a top-tier biology journal. They critique the use of nouns instead of verbs, vague language, unnecessary jargon, and acronyms, which can hinder reader comprehension. The example provided discusses the dysregulation of micro RNA activity in cancer, but the language used makes it difficult to understand. The speaker points out that using verbs instead of nouns can make sentences more dynamic, and that vague terms like 'physiologic' and 'molecular species' do not contribute to clarity. They also note the overuse of acronyms, such as 'MIR' for micro RNA, which can disrupt the reader's flow. The speaker emphasizes the importance of avoiding such writing pitfalls for better communication in scientific writing.

05:01

🔍 Revising for Clarity

The speaker continues with a discussion on improving the readability of scientific writing by revising the previously critiqued passage. They explain the awkwardness of the passive voice and how it can make sentences difficult to read, contrasting it with the more natural active voice. The revision provided simplifies the language, cuts unnecessary words, and maintains the subject-verb proximity for clarity. The speaker then outlines the principles of effective writing to be covered, including cutting clutter, using the active voice, and writing with strong verbs. They stress the importance of these principles for enhancing the clarity and impact of scientific communication.

Keywords

💡Dysregulation

Dysregulation refers to the abnormal functioning or imbalance of a biological process. In the context of the video, it is used to describe the disruption of micro RNA activity, which is crucial for normal cell function. The script mentions that dysregulation of micro RNA activity plays an important role in tumor initiation and progression, including gliomagenesis, indicating its significant impact on health and disease.

💡Micro RNA

Micro RNA (miRNA) are small non-coding RNA molecules that function in RNA silencing and post-transcriptional regulation of gene expression. In the script, the author discusses the importance of miRNA in cancer research, suggesting that changes in their expression can contribute to cancer development, emphasizing their regulatory role in cellular processes.

💡Glioblastoma

Glioblastoma, often shortened to glioma in the script, is a type of aggressive brain tumor that originates from glial cells. The video uses gliomagenesis, which refers to the formation of a glioma, to illustrate the application of scientific writing in discussing complex medical conditions. It highlights the importance of clear communication in scientific literature.

💡Molecular species

Molecular species in the script refers to various types of molecules that can interact with biological systems. The author points out that molecular species capable of regulating miRNA activity without affecting the expression of mature miRNAs could play a significant role in cancer, underscoring the complexity of molecular interactions in disease.

💡Passive voice

Passive voice is a verb form where the object of the action receives the action, rather than performing it. The script criticizes the use of passive voice in scientific writing, stating that it can make sentences difficult to read. For instance, 'has been shown' is in the passive voice and is contrasted with the more direct active voice alternative in the rewritten example.

💡Active voice

Active voice is a verb form where the subject of the sentence performs the action. The video advocates for the use of active voice in writing to make it more engaging and direct. It contrasts the passive construction 'has been shown' with the active 'changes play a role' in the rewritten passage, demonstrating clarity and immediacy.

💡Acronym

An acronym is a word formed from the initial letters of a phrase, as in 'NATO' for North Atlantic Treaty Organization. The script discusses the overuse of acronyms in scientific writing, such as 'MIR' for micro RNA, which can confuse readers. It suggests that authors should avoid acronyms unless they are widely recognized to ensure clarity.

💡Clutter

Clutter in writing refers to unnecessary words or phrases that make the text difficult to understand. The video emphasizes the importance of cutting clutter to improve the clarity and readability of scientific writing. It provides an example of a complex sentence being rewritten to be more concise and straightforward.

💡Verbs

Verbs are action words that express state or occurrence. The script discusses the importance of using strong verbs in writing to create active, engaging sentences. It contrasts the use of nouns as verbs (like 'initiation') with the more dynamic verb forms (like 'initiate'), suggesting that verbs drive the narrative forward.

💡Vague words

Vague words are imprecise terms that do not convey a clear meaning. The video script criticizes the use of vague language like 'physiologic' and 'molecular species' because they do not provide a concrete image for the reader. It advises using more specific language to enhance understanding and engagement.

Highlights

The importance of effective writing in scientific literature.

An example from the top biology journal 'Cell' is used to illustrate writing principles.

The impact of dysregulation of micro RNA activity in cancer.

The use of nouns instead of verbs can slow down the reader.

Vague words can hinder the reader's understanding.

The overuse of jargon and acronyms can disrupt the reading flow.

The issue of acronyms within acronyms, exemplified by 'MIR' for micro RNA.

The difficulty of understanding passive voice constructions.

The recommendation to use active voice for clearer communication.

The problem of burying the main verb, causing reader confusion.

The benefits of keeping the subject and main verb close together.

The principle of cutting unnecessary words and phrases for clarity.

The goal of making scientific writing more accessible and engaging.

The upcoming discussion on the use of active voice versus passive voice.

The focus on using strong verbs and avoiding verb-to-noun conversions.

The edited version of the 'Cell' example for improved readability.

The overview of principles for effective writing to be covered in the following weeks.

Transcripts

So in this next module, I'm gonna go through another example, and use it to

kinda lead into giving you an overview of a couple of principles of effective

writing that I'll be talking about this week as well as next week.

So here's another example that I pulled out of Cell, which of course is the top

biology journal. It has a impact factor of something like

32. So again this is really representative of

the kinds of things you read in the literature.

So it says dysregulation of physiologic micro RNA, MIR.

Activity has been shown to play an important role in tumor initiation and

progression, including gliomagenesis. Therefore, molecular species that can

regulate MIR activity on their target RNAs without affecting the expression of

relevant, mature MIRs may play equally relevant roles in cancer.

So, again, as I'm reading through this, I'm struggling to get through it.

I'm struggling to figure out exactly what it is that the authors were intending to

say. So for this example, I'm gonna.

Point out some very specific features that make these two sentences difficult to

read. So first, as in the examples we saw

earlier, there's the use of nouns rather than verbs.

So the authors use dis-regulation, initiation, progression and expression.

Those are all nouns that could have been verbs: dis-regulate, initiate, progress

and express. Verbs really move the sentences along

whereas, nouns kind of slow the reader down.

The authors also here use some vague words.

The problem with using words that are really vague is that the readers cannot

get a concrete picture in their head of what the author is talking about.

So, those vague word, words don't really add anything.

So, for example, the word physiologic here.

Well, physiology is something that's really, really broad.

So, I'm not exactly sure what the authors mean by physiologic.

It doesn't really add much for me. And then we get down to molecular species.

Well, molecular species could be a lot of things.

And so again, by saying something so vague, it's hard for me to form.

A concrete picture in my head of what the authors are talking about.

So, also note the use of unnecessary jargon and acronyms in this passage.

So we get the term, gliomagenesis. Which is just kind of a fancy way to say,

the formation of glioma. There's easier ways and more direct ways

to say that. We also get kind of, an interesting

acronym in this example. The acronym is actually the reason I

happen to pick this particular example. So the authors abbreviate the term micro

RNA as MIR. It's a little bit amusing, right?

Because RNA is already, itself, an acronym.

So the authors have made an acronym, of an acronym.

And this really is just showing you something that's really widespread out in

the scientific literature. Authors love to use acronyms.

They throw them all over the place. The problem with acronyms is that unless

they're things that are really, really standard that everybody is familiar with.

Most readers aren't gonna know your acronym.

Especially, if you just made it up which many authors do.

So, when they get to your acronym in the piece they're reading, they're gonna have

to stop and pause. And figure out, oh what was, what is MRI?

They have to go back and look it up. And that's gonna halt them.

That's gonna stop them and slow their reading.

It's really, really hard on the reader. It's great for the author, because it

saves them the time of having to write the whole word out every instance.

It's really, really, really hard on the reader so I'm going to encourage you to

avoid the use of acronyms for everything except the most standard acronyms that are

out there. So really get in the habit of trying to

decondition yourself from using so many acronyms.

You can see that in this case there's really no benefit to using the acronym so

Instead of saying you know, you're only saving a couple of letters here by using

MIR rather than micro RNA. And when I get to that second sentence,

and I see you know, molecular species that can regulate MIR, I had to pause and

actually think about what is MIR? So that slowed the reading down for me.

Another thing I want to point out, is in this first sentence the authors use was is

called the passive voice for their verb tense.

So they say, this regulation of physiologic micro RNA activity has been

shown. Now I'm going to spend quite a bit of time

next week talking about the difference between the active and the passive voice

so if this is the first time you're hearing about it or you're not that

comfortable with what that is, we'll go into it in great detail next week.

But for now I'll just point out that that's one thing that makes that sentence

kind of hard to read. Because the English language, the way we

normally talk, is we do subject, verb, object.

The passive voice inverts that and goes object, verb, subject or sometimes just

object, verb. It's a very awkward way, we would never

talk in that way. So, for example, if you take the sentence,

she throws the ball, that's in the active voice.

If you were to turn that in the passive voi, passive voice, you would say, the

ball was thrown by her. And you can see that, that sounds just

very awkward. It makes the writing really hard to read.

So next week we'll talk a lot about trying to not use the passive voice.

The second sentence of that passage is actually in the active voice.

But it has another problem with the verb. In this sentence, the subject of the

sentence is molecular species. The main verb in that sentence is may

play. But, notice that we don't get to, to the

main verb for a long time. We get molecular species and then we get

this whole descriptive clause. And then finally, we get to the verb may

play. Now the problem with this is that the

reader is waiting for the verb. So until you give the reader the verb, the

reader doesn't know where, where you're going with the sentence.

And so that's really hard on the reader. So putting too much distance between the

subject of the sentence and the main verb is a problem.

We're also gonna talk about that in great detail next week when we focus on verbs.

So I took that passage, and I rewrote it, kinda trying to fix some of these issues

that I just pointed out to you. And I'll tell you, I did not have the

author sitting right next to me while I was doing this edit, so I'm not 100

percent sure that I've completely represented what they were trying to say,

but I think I, I've got the general idea. So I, the rewrite says changes in micro

RNA expression play a role in cancer including Glioma.

Therefore, events that disrupt micro RNAs from binding to their target RNAs may also

promote cancer. And I think that's just a lot easier to

understand. I fixed a lot of those issues that I

talked about earlier. And notice how much shorter that second

sentence, that second passage is than the original.

So this leads into giving you a little overview of some of the specific

principles of effective writing that we're gonna be talking about this week and next

week. So the first one is, I want you to learn

to cut your words. Cut unnecessary words and phrases, get rid

of the clutter. We're gonna spend the rest of this week

talking about cutting clutter. Next week we'll talk in great detail about

the use of the active voice, rather than the passive voice.

And we'll also talk about writing with verbs.

Using strong verbs, avoiding turning verbs into noun.

And not burying the main verb. Keeping the subject and the main verb of

the sentence close together at the beginning of the sentence.

So we'll get to numbers two and three in great detail next week, when we focus on

verbs. This week, we're gonna focus on number

one. Learning to cut the clutter.

>> The preceding program is copyrighted by the board of trustees of the

Leland/Stanford Junior University. Please visit us at med.stanford.edu.