Dan Bilzerian on Psychololgy of Hot Girls & best Advcie for Success

Summary

In this video transcript, the speaker discusses his experiences with addiction and the pressures of maintaining a brand image. He shares insights on dating and relationships, highlighting common mistakes men make, such as over-communicating interest and lacking confidence. The conversation delves into the importance of indirect approaches, the role of pre-selection in attraction, and the impact of societal conditioning on men's dating strategies. The speaker emphasizes the need for men to learn from their mistakes, build genuine connections, and maintain a sense of self-worth in the dating market.

Takeaways

• 🐒 The speaker used to feel like a 'sign spinning monkey', indicating a sense of being trapped in a repetitive and unrewarding cycle.
• 🔄 The transition to working with Ignite brought a 'higher level' of work, suggesting a significant positive change in the quality of work.
• 💔 The speaker openly discussed a past 'sex addiction', hinting at personal struggles and a desire for deep and honest conversation.
• 🚀 The launch of the Sigma society program indicates a proactive approach to help men improve their dating and social skills.
• 🙅‍♂️ A key mistake men make is 'overcommunicating interest', which can be off-putting and put them in a less appealing position.
• 🎯 The speaker emphasizes the importance of approaching interactions indirectly to avoid setting oneself up for rejection.
• 📚 Women are often more 'socially calibrated' due to societal expectations and the advice from books and peers, giving them an edge in dating.
• 🤔 The speaker suggests that men often underestimate the value of learning and applying effective strategies in dating, unlike other skills.
• 💪 The concept of 'pre-selection' is introduced as a powerful tool in dating, where being desired by others makes one more attractive.
• 🚫 The script warns against the mainstream narrative that being overly 'nice' is the key to success in dating, arguing it can be counterproductive.
• 🔄 The discussion highlights the importance of not just effort, but the right kind of effort, in achieving success in dating and relationships.

Q & A

What did the speaker feel like during his sign spinning monkey days?

The speaker felt like a rat on a treadmill, feeling obligated to keep doing things for the brand but eventually got over it.

What is the speaker's perspective on the role of dopamine in pleasure seeking?

The speaker believes that dopamine spikes from pleasure seeking are addictive, often stemming from a perceived lack in one's younger days.

What is the Sigma Society program launched by the speaker?

Sigma Society is a program that provides men with a blueprint on how to be attractive and successful in dating.

What are some of the biggest mistakes men make when approaching women, according to the speaker?

Men often massively overcommunicate interest in initial interactions, which can lead to them being perceived as less appealing due to the power dynamics it creates.

Why does the speaker advocate for an indirect approach when men interact with women?

An indirect approach avoids setting oneself up for rejection and allows the interaction to unfold without the immediate pressure of a binary acceptance or rejection.

How does the speaker compare the dating market to poker?

The speaker compares dating to poker, emphasizing the importance of not revealing one's hand too early, much like not showing all your cards in poker.

What does the speaker suggest is the reason behind women reading books on dating strategies?

Women are more socially calibrated due to constant interaction with men, and reading books allows them to refine their strategies, similar to how one would improve at poker knowing everyone's cards.

What is the speaker's view on the effectiveness of traditional dating advice?

The speaker believes much of the traditional dating advice is dead wrong and counterproductive, especially when it comes to the dynamics of attraction and maintaining power in relationships.

Why does the speaker think that masculinity is important in the dating market?

The speaker argues that masculinity is important because it's a trait that women are often attracted to, and the current culture's push for equality and against traditional masculinity is misleading men in the dating market.

What is the speaker's advice for men in relationships where they feel they are making too many sacrifices?

The speaker advises that men should not settle for making too many sacrifices in a relationship, as it can lead to a loss of respect and appreciation from their partner.