The one habit that is changing my life, set systems rather than goals
Summary
TLDRIn this transformative narrative, the speaker recounts a pivotal moment where his wife's candid feedback on his weight loss struggle led to a profound personal revelation. She challenged him to create a system, rather than just setting goals, to achieve his desires. This lesson catalyzed a significant weight loss, a shift in mindset, and an approach to goal-setting that emphasizes systematization over mere ambition. The speaker then introduces a five-step framework to establish effective systems for goal achievement, emphasizing the importance of strategy, one-time actions, daily/weekly routines, and commitment to action. This framework, exemplified by his personal journey, underscores the power of systems in driving progress and success.
Takeaways
- 💡 The speaker learned a valuable lesson about systems and goals from his wife during a low point in his life.
- 🔄 The wife's insight was that the speaker didn't truly want to lose weight because he hadn't created a system to achieve it.
- 🚫 The speaker realized that merely talking and complaining about goals without action is ineffective.
- 🎯 Three significant changes occurred after this realization: losing weight, ceasing complaints, and focusing on systems over goals.
- 📋 The importance of setting clear goals is emphasized as it provides direction and helps in prioritizing actions.
- 🤔 The speaker suggests reflecting on past successes and researching what has worked for others to form a strategy.
- 💼 One-time actions that provide long-term benefits, such as hiring a coach or joining a group, are recommended to move towards the goal.
- 🗓️ Daily or weekly actions are crucial and should be part of a system that consistently works towards the goal.
- 🏋️♂️ The 10-30-100 rule is introduced as a method to commit to daily actions and measure sustainability and progress.
- 🔄 If the daily actions are not sustainable, it's advised to find a new set of actions and reapply the 10-30-100 rule.
- 📺 The channel's content focuses on business, health, personal development, and other aspects of living, with a call to subscribe for more.
Q & A
What was the pivotal moment in the speaker's life that led to a significant change?
-The pivotal moment was when the speaker's wife challenged him on his desire to lose weight, pointing out that he had not created a system to achieve it, which was a reality check that led to a significant change in his approach to goal setting and achieving.
What lesson did the speaker's wife teach him about systems and goals?
-The lesson was that having a desire for a goal is not enough; one must create a system to ensure that the goal is achieved. The speaker's wife emphasized the importance of taking action and setting up a system to make the desired outcome happen.
How did the speaker's perspective on weight loss change after the conversation with his wife?
-The speaker realized that he had been complaining without taking concrete steps to achieve his goal. This led him to stop complaining, start creating systems for achieving his goals, and ultimately lose 100 pounds.
What are the three major changes the speaker experienced after his wife's lesson?
-The three major changes were: 1) He lost 100 pounds, 2) He stopped complaining about what he didn't have and started taking action, and 3) He began creating systems rather than just focusing on goals.
What is the speaker's five-step framework for setting systems to achieve any goal?
-The five-step framework includes: 1) Set the goal, 2) Form a strategy, 3) Take one-time actions, 4) Create a system for daily or weekly action, and 5) Commit to action using the 10-30-100 rule.
Why is setting a goal important according to the speaker?
-Setting a goal is important because it provides direction and helps to sift through the noise to figure out what one truly wants. Without a clear goal, one can be lost and not know where to focus their efforts.
What does the speaker suggest as a starting point for forming a strategy to achieve a goal?
-The speaker suggests looking back at what has worked for oneself in the past and researching what has worked for others in the industry as a starting point for forming a strategy.
What is the purpose of taking one-time actions in the speaker's framework?
-The purpose of taking one-time actions is to solve the problem or achieve the goal with a single effort that pays off forever, such as spending money to solve a problem, changing the environment, or finding groups of people who have solved the problem.
How does the speaker recommend creating a system for daily or weekly action?
-The speaker recommends creating a daily or weekly checklist of actions that contribute towards the goal. This system should be something that can be done consistently to move forward towards the goal.
What is the 10-30-100 rule mentioned by the speaker, and how does it work?
-The 10-30-100 rule is a commitment to action where one commits to their daily actions for 10 days to test sustainability, then for 30 days to see some progress, and finally for 100 days to see major progress towards the goal. It's a method to ensure consistency and commitment to the system created for achieving the goal.
What is the speaker's advice for maintaining motivation and commitment to the system?
-The speaker advises using the 10-30-100 rule to maintain motivation and commitment. Seeing progress after the initial 10 days helps to motivate further action, and continuing the actions for 30 and then 100 days builds momentum and leads to significant progress towards the goal.
What role does human psychology play in the speaker's approach to achieving goals?
-Human psychology plays a significant role as the speaker emphasizes that seeing progress after the initial 10 days of action motivates individuals to continue with their efforts. This psychological boost helps in sustaining the commitment to the system over the long term.
Outlines
💡 Life-Changing Lesson on Systems and Goals
The speaker recounts a pivotal moment in their life when their wife imparted a valuable lesson on the importance of systems over goals. Feeling ashamed about weight gain post-surgery, the speaker was seeking comfort but instead received a reality check. The wife pointed out that without a system in place to achieve weight loss, the speaker's complaints were baseless. This led to a transformation where the speaker lost 100 pounds, stopped complaining, and started creating systems to achieve goals. The speaker emphasizes the significance of setting up daily or weekly actions through a five-step framework to ensure goal achievement, beginning with setting clear goals.
🛠️ Implementing a Five-Step Framework for Goal Achievement
The speaker outlines a five-step framework to set up systems for achieving any goal. The first step is to set a clear goal, which provides direction. The second step involves forming a strategy by reflecting on past successes and learning from others. The third step is to identify one-time actions that can provide long-term benefits, such as investing in coaching or marketing. The fourth step is to create a system for daily or weekly actions that consistently move towards the goal. Lastly, the fifth step is to commit to action, using the 10-30-100 rule to test the sustainability and effectiveness of daily actions over time. The speaker shares personal examples, such as hiring a marketing agency to attract clients, to illustrate the application of this framework. The video concludes with an invitation to subscribe for more content on business, health, and personal development.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Systems
💡Goals
💡Reality Check
💡Strategy
💡One-Time Actions
💡Daily/Weekly Actions
💡Compliance
💡10 30 100 Rule
💡Progress
💡Sustainability
Highlights
A personal low moment led to a life-changing lesson about systems and goals.
The importance of creating a system to achieve goals was emphasized through a personal story.
The speaker lost 100 pounds by creating systems instead of just focusing on goals.
Complaining was replaced with action and system creation for personal development.
A five-step framework for setting systems to achieve any goal was introduced.
The necessity of setting clear goals as a direction for action was discussed.
The role of productivity tools is limited without a clear goal or direction.
Forming a strategy by analyzing past successes is key to achieving goals.
Identifying and learning from industry peers' successful strategies is crucial.
One-time actions that provide long-term benefits were highlighted as impactful.
The value of investing in expert coaching for progress was mentioned.
Daily or weekly actions are essential for consistent progress towards goals.
Creating a daily checklist can help maintain momentum towards a goal.
The importance of committing to daily actions for goal achievement was underscored.
The 10-30-100 rule for committing to new habits was introduced.
Sustainability of daily actions is tested within the first 10 days.
Progress is expected within the first 30 to 40 days of consistent action.
Major progress towards goals can be achieved with 100 days of commitment.
The channel offers videos on business, health, personal development, and other topics.
Transcripts
it was at a really low moment of my life
when my wife taught me a lesson about
systems and goals that changed my life
forever so we were sitting at this old
busted Ikea table this was before the
business before our kids before we even
got married and I was complaining
because I was feeling ashamed about
gaining a bunch of weight after surgery
and I was just kind of feeling like a
fat loser so I asked her why do you
think I'm having so much trouble losing
weight she got a little annoyed and she
looked me in the eye and said because
you don't want to lose weight I said
what of course I want to lose weight she
said if you had wanted to lose weight
you would create a system to make sure
that it happened because you haven't you
clearly don't want it so stop
complaining about it it was like a slap
in the face and it's really why I love
her I was looking for somebody to Pat me
on the back and give me a hug and say
it's gonna be okay and what she gave me
was what I actually needed which was a
reality check the truth is I had talked
about losing weight I complained about
losing weight I even tried to lose
weight but I never actually set my life
up to lose the weight three things
happened after that day number one I
lost 100 pounds number two I stopped
complaining about what I didn't have I
either went for it or I let it go and
number three I started creating systems
rather than focusing on goals when I
started getting serious about creating
systems of daily or weekly actions I
started achieving every goal I set in
fact I don't even consider a goal
serious unless I have a system around it
so today I want to share the five-step
framework I use to set the systems
required to achieve any goal
step number one set the goal the holes
are still important you have to know the
direction you're going in order to take
the steps to get there you could have
the most optimized way to drive to New
York but if you truly want to fly to
Hawaii then your system is useless this
is what a lot of productivity YouTubers
get wrong they'll tell you the perfect
way to use notion or how to set up your
browser to optimize your tabs but that's
not going to help you find customers for
your business or get a raise at your job
what's the point of being productive if
you don't know where you're going the
goal is a way for you to sift through
the noise and figure out what you really
want if you don't have the goal you're
going to be lost now your goal doesn't
have to be I want to earn a million
dollars or I want to lose 20 pounds it
could be your goal is to explore
different career paths in a particular
field or learn as much as you can about
coding or marketing what's important is
that you are clear of the direction
you're going it's important that you
have a goal but the substance of the
goal can be just about anything the key
is that it is something you currently
don't have which will make you do
something that you currently aren't
doing so let's say that I have a goal to
get 25 new people to join my gym now
move on to step number two form a
strategy and there are two questions
that I want to answer here number one
what has worked for you in the past and
number two what has worked for others in
the past so for my goal signing up 25
people I'm going to look back and find a
time where I signed up 60 people in six
weeks and what I did then was talk to as
many people as possible and have my
consults as quickly as possible how did
I find the people I was using Google ads
I was doing Facebook ads so if I want to
achieve that goal again I could try that
same path as a starting point the second
thing is what has worked for others in
the past is there anyone in your
industry that has succeeded despite the
odds what did they do differently find
out what it is and write it all down for
my goal of signing up 25 people I have a
few friends in the industry and a couple
of them have had success despite some of
the lockdowns so I found out that they
were creating documents every single
month that they would offer to new
people to get them on their email list
and once they're on the email list they
emailed them regularly so I'm going to
write all that down what has worked for
me what has worked for others and then
create my strategy number three take the
one-time actions first so these are the
things that you do once that pay off
forever so I'm going to ask myself
questions like where could I spend money
to solve this problem what could I
change about my environment what could I
eliminate where could I find groups of
people that have solved this problem and
just hang around them a lot of times you
can solve your problems and get to your
goals just by taking one-time actions I
especially like spending money to solve
the problem this is why I'm constantly
buying coaching from experts because the
experts will give you the feedback that
will move you forward in a way that you
couldn't figure are out on your own so
with my goal of getting 25 clients I
could hire a coach I could join a group
of people with the same goal I could
make a bet with a friend that if I don't
get 25 clients by this time I'm gonna
give them ten thousand dollars but what
I ended up doing was hiring a marketing
agency that could help me with my ads to
bring in more people and because they're
the experts they are going to bring in
the people for me and if they don't
bring in the people then I'll just go
find a better one step number four
create a system for daily or weekly
action this is really where the rubber
meets the road you need something that
you can do every single day and every
single week that will move you forward
towards this goal ultimately wanting the
goal is not going to get you there so
what I love to do is to take a step
forward every single day so I'll use my
journal to create a daily checklist of
things that I need to do to get to that
action so for my goal of getting 25 new
people I am going to talk to five people
every single day if I do this every day
it doesn't guarantee the goal but I know
that I'm moving forward towards that
goal if you had a goal of losing weight
you might want to hit your nutrition
numbers every day and work out every day
and get to bed by 9 pm every day if you
did those things every day I would say
the chances of you losing weight if you
had weight to lose are going to be
pretty high so what are the daily or
weekly things that you can do that will
move you forward towards this goal if
you don't do this step then you will not
achieve that goal this is really the
system behind the thing but it all falls
apart unless you do step number five
commit to action your plan is
meaningless unless you do something so I
like to use a rule called the 10 30 100
rule so the first 10 days of your new
daily actions your goal is to figure out
if this is something that is sustainable
so for my goal of getting 25 people I
have to talk to to five people every day
in order to get 25 new members so five
people every single day I'm gonna commit
to doing that for 10 straight days and
I'm gonna be a hundred percent compliant
during those 10 days I'm not going to
miss a day if I do I will start over and
the point here is not to get to the
result although you may get some results
the point is to see if this is something
you can sustain in your daily life if
you can do something for 10 days is less
than two weeks if you can do it for 10
days then you can probably do it for
longer if you can't do it for 10 days
then you need to find a new set of
actions and try something new that you
can sustain as part of your daily life
so this is just a test those first 10
days once you finish the 10 days
assuming that it's something you can fit
in your life now we focus on getting you
some sort of progress and that is the
next 30 days so those 30 days you're
going to continue those daily actions
and I don't commit to doing a hundred
percent ninety percent is okay so if you
miss one day a week or one day every two
weeks that is okay but you're going to
commit for the next 30 days to see if
you can get some sort of progress you're
not going to get the result but you're
going to get some sort of progress so if
my goal is to sign up 25 new people and
I'm talking to five people every day and
I do that for 40 days so the first 10
days plus another 30 days I do that I'm
gonna see some sort of progress I may
not sign up 25 people but I might sign
up two or three and I might have started
some conversations that wouldn't have
happened otherwise so now I've done this
for 30 days I've started to see progress
and here's the thing about human
psychology once you see progress then
you are motivated to do more and that's
when I commit to the 100. you can
completely change your life in a hundred
days so if you take those daily actions
and then you do them for an additional
100 days then even if you're only 80
compliant like you're not even 100
you're 80 compliant you will start to
see major progress towards your goals so
that's the 10 30 100 tool if you really
want to commit to those daily actions
you've got to follow that rule and if
you fall off at some point go through
this whole process again start over
again with a new set of actions or
adjust your actions and then go through
that 10 30 100 rule again if you're new
to this channel my name is Jay this
channel features one to two videos a
week with topics around Business Health
personal development and other fun
experiments in living if you enjoyed
what you saw please consider subscribing
stay focused stay curious and keep
showing up we'll see you in the next one
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