I'm 26. If you are in your 20's, watch this.
Summary
TLDRIn this inspiring video, the 26-year-old speaker imparts life wisdom, urging viewers to prioritize the journey over the destination and find happiness in everyday moments. She emphasizes learning from mistakes, the importance of surrounding oneself with supportive people, and the power of self-belief. With a call to embrace imperfection and live authentically, she encourages viewers to be their best selves, reminding them that they are already '10s' and that others' opinions hold less weight than their own self-worth.
Takeaways
- π― Prioritize the Journey: Happiness is fleeting when tied to reaching a goal, and true contentment comes from enjoying the process of life's journey.
- π Be Content Daily: It's possible to find happiness every day without relying on external achievements; focus on gratitude and the present moment.
- π‘ Learn from Mistakes: Embrace the learning opportunity that comes with making mistakes and understand that they are part of personal growth.
- π€ Better Together: Surround yourself with supportive people who share your interests or are ahead on the same path to enhance your journey.
- π Trust in a Higher Power: Believe that a higher being or destiny can guide you and provide opportunities if you open yourself to receive them.
- π Recognize Your Worth: You are inherently valuable and a '10', not because of external validation but because of your self-belief and inherent qualities.
- π€ Embrace Imperfection: It's okay to be 'cringe' or imperfect in public because most people are too busy with their own lives to judge you harshly.
- πͺ Self-Validation: Your self-worth should come from within, and you should not seek validation from others to feel complete.
- π Be Yourself: Live authentically and pursue what makes you happy without fear of others' opinions, as they are less concerned than you think.
- π Take Action: Overcome fear of judgment by taking steps towards what you've always wanted to do, knowing that others' attention is fleeting.
Q & A
What is the main message the speaker wants to convey to her younger self and the audience?
-The speaker emphasizes the importance of prioritizing the journey over the destination, finding happiness in the process rather than waiting for milestones to achieve it.
Why does the speaker believe that happiness is often short-lived after achieving a goal?
-The speaker explains that happiness after reaching a goal only lasts briefly because life's challenges quickly arise again, prompting the pursuit of the next big thing.
What realization did the speaker have when she turned 26 regarding happiness?
-The speaker realized that she could be happy every single day and in every single moment without relying on external achievements, and that happiness should not be conditional on reaching certain milestones.
What advice does the speaker give to perfectionists who believe happiness comes only with success?
-The speaker advises perfectionists to take a deep breath, write down 10 things they are grateful for, and acknowledge the fortune in their lives, which can lead to a realization of their already amazing life.
How does the speaker describe the process of dealing with negative experiences?
-The speaker describes dealing with negative experiences as a learning process and an opportunity for growth, emphasizing the importance of how one mentally and emotionally handles these situations.
What mistake did the speaker make in her professional career that led to a significant emotional reaction?
-The speaker made a mistake regarding a product she was overseeing, where a name was not capitalized correctly due to miscommunication and multiple revisions, leading to panic and anxiety attacks.
What advice did the speaker's boss give her about making mistakes?
-Her boss advised that making mistakes is a learning experience and that dealing with mistakes is another learning process, encouraging her to view them as opportunities for growth.
Why does the speaker suggest that negative experiences can indicate unresolved childhood trauma?
-The speaker suggests that negative experiences, such as repeated bad relationships, can be signs of unhealed childhood trauma, indicating areas of personal growth that need attention.
What is the speaker's perspective on the importance of surrounding oneself with the right people?
-The speaker believes that having supportive and like-minded people around can make the journey more fun, motivational, and productive, and can help in bouncing ideas and making progress.
What strategies does the speaker recommend for finding like-minded people or mentors?
-The speaker recommends joining community groups, using Meetup apps, reaching out on LinkedIn, participating in Discord groups, and even leveraging dating apps to find people with similar interests.
What role does the speaker believe a higher power or destiny plays in one's life?
-The speaker believes that asking a higher power or destiny for things can lead to receiving them, suggesting that this practice provides a feminine energy of receptivity that can attract people and opportunities.
Why does the speaker suggest that one should believe they are a '10'?
-The speaker suggests believing in oneself as a '10' to cultivate an inner confidence that emanates a positive aura, attracting people and opportunities, regardless of external validation.
What is the speaker's advice on overcoming the fear of being judged or appearing 'cringe'?
-The speaker advises that no one truly cares about one's actions to the extent that fear suggests, and that the only opinion that matters is one's own, encouraging authenticity and self-expression.
What challenge does the speaker issue to the audience regarding their fears and aspirations?
-The speaker challenges the audience to pursue something they've been afraid to do due to fear of judgment, emphasizing that others' opinions are fleeting and one's own happiness is paramount.
Outlines
π― Prioritizing the Journey Over the Destination
The speaker, at 26 years old, advises prioritizing the journey towards goals rather than fixating on the destination. They explain that happiness from achieving goals is fleeting and emphasize the importance of finding happiness in everyday life. The speaker reflects on their own past, where they found temporary happiness in academic and career achievements but soon realized the need to chase the next milestone, leading to a cycle of dissatisfaction. They encourage the audience to appreciate the present and the people in their lives, suggesting that goals should be seen as bonuses rather than the sole source of happiness.
π€ Dealing with Mistakes and Negative Experiences
The speaker shares a personal story of a significant professional mistake that led to panic and anxiety, highlighting the importance of learning from and dealing with mistakes. They convey a valuable lesson from their bossβthat mistakes are part of the learning process and dealing with them is a skill in itself. The speaker encourages the audience to embrace negative experiences as opportunities for growth and to seek healing from unresolved childhood traumas that might be contributing to recurring negative patterns in their lives.
π The Power of Community and Self-Belief
The speaker discusses the benefits of surrounding oneself with supportive people and the importance of believing in one's own worth. They share their experience of starting an online business with the help of new connections and emphasize the value of finding mentors, role models, and like-minded individuals. The speaker also touches on the power of asking for help from a higher power or the universe, suggesting that having faith and an abundance mindset can attract positive experiences and opportunities.
π Embracing Individuality and Self-Confidence
The speaker encourages the audience to embrace their individuality and to believe in their own worth, regardless of external validation. They argue that self-confidence and inner belief in being a '10' is more important than physical appearance or others' opinions. The speaker also challenges the fear of being judged as 'cringe', stating that people's attention is fleeting and that the only opinion that truly matters is one's own. They advocate for living life authentically and pursuing personal desires without the fear of judgment.
Mindmap
Keywords
π‘Journey
π‘Happiness
π‘Milestone
π‘Gratitude
π‘Mistakes
π‘Negative Experiences
π‘Healing
π‘Community
π‘Self-Belief
π‘Authenticity
π‘Cringe
Highlights
The importance of prioritizing the journey over the destination for sustainable happiness.
Happiness is fleeting when tied to achieving goals and material possessions.
Learning to find happiness in everyday moments, independent of external achievements.
The realization that 90% of life's value comes from the journey, not just the milestones.
Personal anecdotes on the temporary nature of happiness derived from academic and career achievements.
The shift in perspective from chasing success to embracing contentment in the present.
Dealing with professional mistakes and the lessons learned from them.
The transformative power of handling mistakes as a learning opportunity.
Coping with negative experiences as a part of personal growth and maturity.
Understanding that unresolved childhood trauma can manifest in adult relationships.
The healing process of acknowledging and addressing past traumas.
The benefits of surrounding oneself with supportive and like-minded individuals.
Strategies for finding mentors, role models, and communities to foster personal and professional growth.
The role of faith and a higher power in attracting positive experiences and people.
Embracing an abundance mindset to create space for opportunities and relationships.
The empowerment of self-belief in one's inherent value and potential.
Overcoming the fear of judgment by recognizing that others' opinions are fleeting.
The liberating effect of being authentic and not seeking external validation.
Encouraging viewers to pursue their desires without fear of being perceived as 'cringe'.
Transcripts
at the time of filming this video I'm 26
if I could go back in time and tell my
younger self anything here's exactly
what I advise her and this is what I'm
going to share with you today number one
prioritize the journey not the
destination everyone will think that
they will only be happy once they reach
their goal once you start achieving
$100,000 USD a month once you get your
dream card once you have your own Manion
once you can do this do that you will be
happy but here's the reality that
happiness will only last for a few hours
a few days or best a few months and then
start and then life is going to hit you
all over again and you're going to be
start chasing the next big thing here's
what I learned when I turned 26 which is
that you can be happy every single day
every single moment without putting that
happiness on something else you might
think that oh I want to push myself so
that I will only be happy once I reach
my financial milestone for that month
here's the reality guys you can be happy
every single day and that goal will be a
bonus on that 90% of everyone's journey
is the journey itself and 10% is hitting
that Milestone so why do you only put
that happiness when you reach the
Milestone when that 90% 90% of the time
is going to be you on that Journey
towards your dreams case in point I have
always put my happiness growing up when
I reach my study success meaning when I
get like the best grades the best rank
or whatever get into my dream University
get into my dream internship and get
into my dream job and then I was so
happy when it did but guess what that
happiness only lasted me for 2 days
maybe 3 days maybe maximum a week and
then I start to realize oh no I have to
grind all over again I have to chase the
next thing all over again and that life
was so miserable because I have always
lived my life for maybe like 10 plus
years is academically like chasing uh
academic success like over and over
again and now that I'm actually working
I'm 266 years I've been working like
officially for like four years like oh
my gosh now what am I chasing am I
chasing like a Career Success and
promotions and everything I'm like oh my
goodness when am I going to be happy
because I don't know where I'm going to
get promoted if that's going to be my
new goal so this year what I've realized
is that actually it's so easy if I could
just be happy right here right now be
super grateful for every single day and
be super like just happy with who I have
in my life with all the blessings maybe
misfortunes success failures and all of
that I could be happy right now and
having a goal having like a dream is
something that's giving me purpose it's
a bonus of that I can be happy right now
calling my parents telling my siblings I
love them and being grateful to all my
friends mentors and role models in my
life so here's what I want to share with
you you can be happy right now and if
you're someone who's like a
perfectionist like me and like oh my God
you I'm only going to be happy once I
reach like 100k a month you know of like
success then I'm only going to be happy
then like I'm telling you stop it take a
deep breath take out a piece of paper
write 10 things that you're grateful for
in your life and actually acknowledge
them like how fortunate you are to have
them in your life and then you got be
like oh my goodness your life is
actually amazing like why did I not
realize it sooner and then chasing all
those goals and dreams is going to be
something that's giving you purpose and
something that's going to give you like
that you know like sense of excitement
every day but other that you can go to
bit happy already so that's one thing
that I'm super super super want to share
with my younger self and with you guys
okay prioritize the journey not to
destination second thing dealing with
negative experiences world doesn't end
just because you made a mistake H in
point this year I went through one of a
big big big mistakes in my professional
career what is it exactly it's so funny
when you hear this because you're going
to be like oh my goodness pitch is like
being over dramatic but at that time I
was having panic attacks I was having
anxiety attacks I could not breathe I
had to call my best friend to tell you
know to tell my best friend like oh my
goodness I cannot breathe like I I
literally feel feel like panicking and
crying at the same time I didn't even
know that could that could happen but I
was panicking and crying at the same
time so what happened was that I
actually made a mistake with regards to
my product uh that I'm currently
overseeing my full-time job I made a
mistake where one of the names were not
capitalized correctly and this happened
because there was like a
miscommunication issue where there were
so many teams involved there were legal
compliance CX and had to like there was
at least like five different revisions
and I did not pick up that uh there was
this revision that was not coordinated
with everyone so what that means was
that I missed out that detail and when I
found out like maybe two or three months
later that this detail was missing I
panicked so hard because I had never
made a mistake that was on a scale where
it was a very significant and it's going
to cost the team money and here's one
thing that my boss shared with me that I
felt was like wow he shared with me me
that this is an experience for you to
learn on how to make mistakes and fix it
because before I was taught not to ever
make mistakes because mistakes will
penalize you when you make mistakes
growing up in Singapore it means you get
like a mark deducted right or it means
that you were not closer to your dreams
or your goals or your like whatever but
then what the thing that my boss shared
with me was that actually making
mistakes is a learning process and how
to deal with mistakes itself is another
learning progress so what I want to
share with you and what you can take
away from this experience is that you
can learn how to deal with negative
experiences because they will happen and
how you deal with them is going to be a
whole experience by itself so the world
doesn't end when you make mistakes but
how you fix them how you deal with them
mentally emotionally is going to be part
of that growing up Journey that maturing
Journey that I hope everyone will be
able to like you know learn from and
learn through it and become better out
of it so that's one thing like super
important that you can take away from my
experience from learning how to deal
with negative experiences and healing
with all those like trauma on top of
that on the point of like negative
experiences sometimes you might have
like relationship bad negative
relationship experiences Cas imply
heartbreaks breakups headaches
situationships all of this negative
experience
are also there to teach you something
teach you that you might have unhealed
childhood trauma so for example while
people would be going through
situationships and being having like
attachment avoidant you know Styles
there is something in your childhood
trauma that you have not healed from
that's why you're still going through
this negative experiences all over again
and like multiple times case in point I
had a situationship for like a whole
year and I did not recognize that it was
a situationship until I realized oh no
I'm having another one again and I'm
tolerating another one again and I'm
like girl why and I start to realize oh
that's because I have a lot of unkill
trauma that I have not dealt with I
allow kind of like this kind of like
barely burn minimum efforts and no no no
no no I do not tolerate bad minimum
efforts tamur and The Wizard list has
stopped not to tolerate bare minimum
efforts and part of that comes my choco
trauma that I don't have enough love
that's why any inch of Love would be
enough to Plate me for a certain amount
of time and I realized I want to heal
the childhood trauma I'm going to start
going to therapy in order to know that I
can do better so that's something that I
want you guys to learn as well which is
that when you have negative experiences
they teach you something and one of
these things could be that you still
have unresolved trauma left from the
past and it's your time to start healing
them number three better together but
filter one thing that I realized in life
is that things are always much more fun
when you do like you know like when you
have people that you like surrounding
you here's in points I've always wanted
to start my own like online business
because I feel like that entrepreneurial
side of me wants to have my own business
but I've always been just like going on
YouTube and like you know like seeing
things and like watching Iman GTI
YouTube guru is at the moment and
following tutorials but I realized I've
never went anywhere and only this year I
met like amazing people who have helped
me to start my own online business in
Drop Shipping and e-commerce and now
even SAS and I realized that the reason
why that's possible is because I was
surrounded with amazing people that
could help me or have fun together to
towards my journey and one thing I
wanted to share with you is that you if
you ever have like feel like you're
alone in this journey you're not making
progress find people you could be
finding mentors finding role model
finding friends who would be on the same
path as you or who already are on that
path and you know like many steps ahead
it's much more fun when you are doing
this together it's much more
motivational you feel like you can
bounce ideas of each other and you don't
have to be alone how can you find this
one maybe go outside go on community
groups if you have like Meetup apps find
them two if you really can't find people
go to LinkedIn go and search for people
who are in the same space as you and see
how you can offer value to them Cod DM
them see how you can connect with them
three Discord groups Discord groups are
great ways to like see like-minded
interest and like-minded communities
especially if you're in some the
entrepreneurial online space so many
Discord groups where that's happening
and for school SK o l where there's also
a lot of like Community Based groups
there as well and five if you really
really cannot and you want to leverage
something like that I've been hacking go
on like dating apps and like go and put
like oh I'm finding people who are and
you can find someone in the opposite
gender who has this set interest you did
not need to sleep with them but you can
use this as a very instant like you know
like connection way or whatever Leverage
is to however you want but please just
get creative if you really are
passionate about what you want to do and
you want to find people who are on the
same path then utilize all these online
you know like spaces and find
like-minded people in your areas if not
the traditional old way works as well
where you can ask friends if they know
someone it's similar or if they know
someone who are in this space it was the
most unexpected thing where I just went
on like a bar with my friends who came
from Singapore in Bangkok and I actually
met them so that's why I want to start
to my uh next point which is that God is
good God is good because I've always
wanted to meet people in this space but
I've never met anyone until the start of
this year where God literally send me
people in this space I was shocked
because personally I have never believe
in the higher being I always thought
that things can come to me if I I work
hard for it if I start you know like
being so super disciplined super
diligent and working hard every day but
I realized you are just putting in a lot
of masculine energy but when you ask for
God it's asking the high being to send
people your way to start receiving not
just pushing pushing and pushing you can
actually start asking God for things to
come to you for example people you want
to meet friends you want to have things
to come to your way now I do not
advocate for you to be go and become a
Christian and therefore start believing
in God you can start believing in God no
matter what religion you have you could
be Buddhist like myself where I have
Buddha but you know just any High being
or even if you're a non-believer just
believe in like Destiny or like you know
like Faith or whatever you know like
start asking for things and they will
come and the power of asking for things
is that
this will give you feminine energy and
space to receive the space to receiv
receives will have a different Aura will
give you a different Aura such that when
you create space to receive people want
to come in but if you start pushing
pushing pushing imagine you want to push
things are not going to come in because
they all going to be repelled by all
your Force so what I mean by this is
that you want to start giving space to
receive start living in that abundance
mindset like what everyone say why
abundance mindset because you have the
space to give for people to enter and
that Co only stuff you have the
abundance mindset you're like you know
I'm enough and I'm amazing and I'm
awesome people will be attracted to you
great things will come to you jobs will
come and find you because you're meant
for it so that's what I believe when I
say God is good start asking start
receiving next and fifth is that you're
a 10 and don't ask people to think
you're a 10 because only you yourself
can make yourself feel like a 10 K in
point I've always thought that pretty
people or handsome people attract
attention or at least you know they are
10 because they look amazing but
actually what I realized this year is
that you're a 10 because you you believe
you're a 10 and not because any other
people's opinion how can you believe
you're a 10 doesn't have to rely on your
physical appearance but it could be that
confidence that comes from within that
amazing smile that you have have you're
amazing could be from even if you have
not achieved all the amazing success
that you thought you needed to feel like
a 10 you can start feeling a 10 because
you are alive you're breathing you're
human anyone you have the same hands
feet and legs as like any other like you
know like fors or Fortune 500 CEOs you
guys have the same organs you can be a
10 today without thinking that you need
to look like Brad Pit or or like you
know like Ryan Reynolds right but you
all can't believe that you're a 10 just
because all the amazing gifts that you
were born with already all the amazing
gifts that God has given you okay so
start believing that you're a 10 and all
that energy and Aura is going to start
emanating and attracting people so
that's one thing that I want to also
share with you and that brings me on to
my last point be cringe no one cares now
this year I've started to post content
on my personal Instagram before I've
never actually posted anything because I
didn't know people to think that I I was
cringe I didn't know one my friends to
think that oh my God pit she so cringe
why is she posting content like this
guys I'm going to give you the hot
reality right now no one cares that you
are being cringe that you're posting
content because they might at maximum
give you 5 Seconds of their life and
then move on with the rest of their
Journey they have so many things to do
why would they give you any more time so
that means that you can do whatever you
want you can post whatever you want go
to whatever you want be whoever you want
because no one cares even if they care
that means that they have an ounce of
attention or it means that you're so
amazing that they are giving you that
attention for free because that's how
amazing you are so that's one thing I
realize when I'm like when I turn 26
which is that actually you can just do
whatever you want no no one cares the
only person that matters is yourself so
I want you to take on this challenge
that if you want to do something that
you have not been doing for a long time
go do it because you're afraid that
people might think they don't care they
would start maybe like maximum give you
like some lecture but at the end of the
day you're with yourself 24 hours of the
day 24/7 so if you're not going to start
living for yourself then no one else is
going to live that dream life for you be
who you want to be I'm going to give you
a recap okay by the time I turn 26 I've
realized six things first prioritize the
journey not the destination second how
to deal with negative experiences third
better together but filter fourth God is
good fifth you're a 10 and sixth be
cringe no one cares I hope you guys all
live your amazing life cuz you are
amazing and you deserve to have a life
well lived today tomorrow the day after
thank you girlies and guyses and I'll
see you guys in the next video
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