A Weird Trick To Get More Confidence

Summary

The speaker discusses the concept of confidence, defining it as self-assurance in one's identity and comfort in being oneself in various situations. They share a personal trick to boost confidence: verbalizing one's internal monologue when alone, which helps to recognize and challenge irrational thoughts and practice expressing oneself authentically. This practice is suggested as a way to improve self-awareness and social comfort, leading to increased confidence.

Takeaways

• 😌 Confidence is a trait that varies among individuals; some are naturally more self-assured, while others struggle to voice their thoughts.
• 🔍 The speaker defines confidence as two abilities: knowing who you are and being comfortable being yourself in different situations.
• 🤔 People with low confidence might act differently around others, not portraying their true selves, unlike confident individuals who can be themselves even with strangers.
• 💡 The speaker shares a personal trick to boost confidence, which involves verbalizing one's internal monologue when alone to become more aware of one's thoughts.
• 🗣️ By speaking out loud, one can identify and challenge irrational or unhelpful thoughts that may be running in their head.
• 🚶‍♂️ The trick can be practiced alone, such as while walking, driving, or any time when one is by themselves, pretending to be a vlogger narrating thoughts.
• 💭 Speaking your thoughts can help you realize which thoughts are not rational, providing a feedback loop that wasn't present when thinking internally.
• 📢 The act of verbalizing thoughts can also help with social situations, as it trains you to be more comfortable with expressing what's on your mind.
• 💪 The speaker suggests that confidence can be distilled to the ability to say what's on your mind, which is something that can be practiced and improved.
• 🤷‍♂️ There's a risk of being perceived as 'crazy' by others if they see you talking to yourself, but the speaker argues that the benefits outweigh this minor inconvenience.
• 📝 The speaker recommends trying this method and possibly sharing experiences in the comments, emphasizing that it's a personal discovery, not a scientifically-backed technique.

Q & A

What is the speaker's personal definition of confidence?

The speaker defines confidence as having two abilities: knowing who you are and not being unsure about what you're doing every day, and being comfortable being yourself in different situations.

Why does the speaker believe that some people are born with confidence?

The speaker suggests that some people are born with confidence because they are able to talk and walk everywhere with their heads held high, expressing their thoughts without fear from the moment they can communicate.

What is the 'trick' the speaker learned to boost their confidence?

The trick involves verbalizing one's internal monologue when alone, turning it into an external monologue, which helps in recognizing and adjusting irrational thoughts and getting used to expressing oneself openly.

How does the speaker describe the internal monologue of shy or unconfident people?

The speaker describes it as a constant internal dialogue that runs 24/7, where people say things in their head that they would never voice out loud.

What is the benefit of verbalizing one's internal monologue according to the speaker?

Verbalizing the internal monologue allows a person to hear and evaluate their thoughts, realizing which ones might be irrational or unnecessary, and it helps in practicing expressing oneself openly.

Why does the speaker suggest that verbalizing thoughts can help in knowing who you are?

By verbalizing thoughts, a person gets a better sense of their true thoughts and feelings, which contributes to self-awareness and understanding of their identity.

What is the issue the speaker identifies with not speaking one's mind?

The issue is that when people don't speak their minds, especially in social situations, they may act in ways that are not true to who they are, leading to a disconnect and a lack of confidence.

How does the speaker recommend using the 'trick' before going to the gym?

The speaker recommends using the 'trick' by verbalizing whatever is on their mind while driving to the gym, using it as a way to hype themselves up and prepare mentally for the workout.

What is the potential downside of verbalizing one's internal monologue in public?

The potential downside is that others might perceive the person as being 'crazy' if they see them talking to themselves, which is something the person might have to accept or deal with.

Why does the speaker suggest that journaling or making YouTube videos could be helpful?

These activities can help externalize internal thoughts, making them feel more real and allowing for a more objective look at one's situation, which can contribute to building confidence.

What does the speaker mean by 'saying what's on your mind makes everything real'?

The speaker means that by expressing one's thoughts out loud, those thoughts become more tangible and real to the person, which can be relaxing and help in reducing the mental burden of bottling up thoughts.

Outlines

00:00

🤔 The Struggle with Confidence

This paragraph discusses the concept of confidence, highlighting the difference between those who naturally exude it and those who struggle to voice their thoughts, even among friends. The speaker shares personal experiences of lacking confidence and introduces a unique self-devised method to boost confidence. The essence of confidence is defined as knowing who you are and being comfortable being yourself in various situations. The paragraph sets the stage for the 'trick' to be explained, which involves externalizing one's internal monologue to gain self-awareness and improve confidence.

05:02

🗣️ Verbalizing Internal Thoughts to Build Confidence

The speaker presents a personal strategy for enhancing confidence by verbalizing one's internal monologue when alone, such as during a walk or driving. This practice is said to reveal and challenge irrational thoughts, leading to a better understanding of oneself and improved self-assurance. The speaker also touches on the importance of being genuine in social situations and the benefits of expressing one's true thoughts and feelings openly. The paragraph concludes with a recommendation to try this method as a means to make one's internal world more tangible and to foster a more objective perspective on personal situations.

Keywords

💡Confidence

Confidence is a psychological state where an individual feels certain and secure about their abilities, worth, and beliefs. In the video, it is defined as having the ability to know who you are and being comfortable being yourself in different situations. The speaker uses their personal journey to illustrate the transformation from a lack of confidence to a state where they can express themselves openly without fear.

💡Internal Monologue

An internal monologue refers to the continuous stream of thoughts and words that we have in our minds without vocalizing them. The video emphasizes the importance of turning this internal dialogue into an external one as a means to boost confidence. The speaker suggests that by verbalizing thoughts, individuals can better evaluate and understand their own perspectives, as exemplified by the speaker's realization of their own irrational thoughts during the process.

💡Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the conscious knowledge of one's own character, feelings, motives, and desires. The video relates self-awareness to confidence by stating that knowing who you are is the first step towards being confident. The speaker's trick of verbalizing thoughts is a method to enhance self-awareness, allowing for a clearer understanding of one's own identity and feelings.

💡Portraying Oneself

Portraying oneself refers to the act of representing oneself in a certain way, especially in terms of character or behavior. The video suggests that confident individuals are those who can portray themselves authentically in various situations without feeling nervous or out of place. The speaker contrasts this with unconfident people who may act differently around others to avoid discomfort.

💡Shyness

Shyness is a feeling of nervousness or awkwardness in the presence of other people. In the context of the video, shyness is presented as a barrier to expressing one's thoughts and feelings openly. The speaker identifies with shyness and uses it to explain the challenges faced by those who struggle with confidence in social situations.

💡Introversion

Introversion is a personality trait characterized by a tendency to be reserved and less responsive to external stimuli. The speaker identifies as an introvert and discusses how introverts might have an internal monologue that they do not express out loud. The video suggests that introverts can benefit from the trick of externalizing their thoughts to overcome the challenges associated with their personality type.

💡Verbalizing

Verbalizing is the act of expressing something in words. The video's main trick for boosting confidence involves verbalizing one's internal monologue. By doing so, the speaker found that they could challenge and reassess their own thoughts, leading to increased self-awareness and confidence.

💡Authenticity

Authenticity refers to the quality of being genuine and not false or copied. The video emphasizes the importance of being authentic in portraying oneself as a key aspect of confidence. The speaker suggests that confident people are those who can be themselves without feeling the need to conform to others' expectations.

💡Social Disconnect

Social disconnect refers to a sense of isolation or separation from others in a social context. The video discusses how a lack of confidence can lead to social disconnect, as individuals may not express their true thoughts and feelings, causing others to misunderstand them. The speaker's trick aims to bridge this disconnect by encouraging individuals to express their internal thoughts.

💡Personal Growth

Personal growth is the process of improving and developing as a person. The video's narrative is centered around the speaker's personal growth journey from being a lack of confidence to finding a method that has helped them become more confident. The trick of verbalizing thoughts is presented as a tool for personal growth, allowing the speaker to better understand and express themselves.

Highlights

Confidence is defined as the ability to know who you are and being comfortable being yourself in different situations.

Some people naturally have confidence, while others struggle with voicing their thoughts even to friends.

The speaker used to be one of the least confident people, having difficulty expressing thoughts even to friends.

Confidence involves not being nervous around strangers and being true to oneself regardless of the audience.

A personal trick to boost confidence is verbalizing one's internal monologue when alone.

Verbalizing thoughts can help identify and challenge irrational or unhelpful thoughts.

The act of speaking thoughts out loud provides feedback and can adjust one's perspective on their own thoughts.

Confident people tend to express whatever is on their mind without fear.

The speaker suggests practicing speaking one's mind to improve the ability to express oneself authentically.

Introverts may lose the ability to speak fluently if they go too long without social interaction.

Daily practice of verbalizing thoughts can help overcome the hesitation to express oneself in social situations.

Confidence can be boiled down to the ability to say what's on one's mind at all times.

The speaker shares a personal example of challenging irrational thoughts by verbalizing them.

Lying to oneself can be a part of the process to build confidence and change one's mindset.

The speaker recommends trying this method before going to the gym or other activities to build confidence.

The method of verbalizing thoughts is not based on scientific research but on personal experience.

The speaker encourages viewers to try verbalizing their thoughts and share their experiences in the comments.

Transcripts

confidence is one of those tricky things

where some people are born with it you

all know this person from the moment

they were able to talk they just walk

everywhere with their head held high

saying what's on their mind not a fear

in the world but then there's people

like you and me um you know we grow up

and we just it's very hard for us to

voice what's on our mind to strangers

and even our friends sometimes you know

you you go to the you go to the barber

and you don't like your haircut and you

just don't say anything because you

don't have the confidence to I've been

there if you guys don't know a couple

years ago like just watch some of my old

First videos um I was one of the most

least confident people on the planet you

know I had difficulty even talking to my

friends sometimes saying what's on my

mind um but there's a trick I learned

kind of recently that has boosted my

confidence unbelievably and it's a

really weird thing and I'm going to get

into it but first I want to talk about

what is confidence because you know you

see this word throw around all the time

but what actually is it I personally I

Define confidence is two abilities the

first ability is to know who you are you

know not be unsure about what you're

doing every day and the second thing is

how comfortable you are being yourself

in different situations so you know

someone who's very unconfident they may

not act like themsel even around their

friends and family whereas someone who's

really confident they can act like

themselves around random strangers you

know they they see a pretty girl on the

street stone cold sober and still they

cannot even not be nervous whatsoever so

a really confident person is someone who

knows who they are are and is not does

not have a problem whatsoever portraying

that wherever they go so um that this

leads me to the trick I found and I'm

going to try to explain this in a way

that makes sense because it is really

weird I don't this is one of those rare

times where I didn't get it from reading

a book I didn't get it from seeing some

inspirational video this is something

that I literally just came up with on my

own so I'm going to see if I can patent

this trick but basically here here's the

science behind it shy people unconfident

people um we have this internal

monologue running 24/7 you know we're

talking in our head but we never voice

it because you know for some reason and

this is mainly for introverts extroverts

if you're watching this let me know if

you guys have the same thing but

basically this internal monologue is

running 247 and we're saying things in

our head that we would never say out

loud you know and some of sometimes

these things we're saying are very

ridiculous but the thing about confident

people they whatever's in their head

they just say and it's a beautiful thing

that if everyone could do that the world

would be a much better place but

basically here's the trick and here's

how you manipulate this when you're by

yourself or wherever you're most

comfortable I I usually do this when I'm

driving but you know you could be on a

walk or something anytime you're by

yourself just try to take that internal

monologue and just verbalize it make it

an external monologue so let let's say

you're walking you're going on a walk by

yourself or you're driving or whatever

whatever thoughts you're having in your

head literally pretend like you're a

YouTube vlogger and just say all of them

I started doing this like a month or two

ago and what I found is when you say

your internal monologue a a great

benefit of it is that you get to hear

some thoughts that are actually

ridiculous that you would never think

are ridiculous in the first place like

you ever have that moment where you

think something all the time and then

when you finally say it out loud you're

like well that's kind of stupid and it's

because when you say it in your head you

don't really have that feed back of like

hm maybe that is kind of stupid but when

you actually verbalize these internal

thoughts you can actually be like hm

maybe I shouldn't think that way you

know for example um I I'll give you a

personal example I for whatever reason

fall into these ruts where I think like

no one likes me for no reason whatsoever

and I'll be thinking that over and over

and it'll make so much sense in my head

but when I actually get into this mode

where I actually talk about it you know

to no one I'm just saying it uh to

myself I'm like wait this is kind of

stupid cuz you know if you hear someone

else say something stupid you can

immediately be like okay that's stupid

but for whatever reason when we have

stupid thoughts in our head they just

sound completely normal and we keep uh

we keep um we keep persisting with those

thoughts because there's no way to um

you know recognize that stupid but if

you can just take some time every day to

just say out loud what your in internal

monologue is thinking you're you're

going to get a way better sense of um

what who you actually are and that leads

to the the first part of confidence of

knowing who you are the second reason

this strategy is so um effective is

because if you're an introvert like me

or you just um aren't around people that

much you you've probably had a moment

where you go a whole day or something

without talking to anyone and then when

you finally do end up talking to someone

uh you literally lose the ability to

speak like the words in your brain just

don't work at all so if you if you can

take some time literally just talking by

yourself saying whatever is on your mind

then you're a lot more likely to do what

confident people do which is just saying

what's on your mind that's literally I

mean if if you could boil down

confidence to one thing it's just saying

what's on your mind all the time and and

you know obviously there's exceptions to

this there's sometimes where you're

going to not want to do this but you

know life unbelievably you know who

would have thought thought it but life

will get so much better if you can just

be yourself as much as possible and

people like me and probably you if

you're watching this you know we have

this problem where we'll have this

internal monologue of who you actually

are but then we're so uncomfortable in

social situations that we say things

that aren't who we are at all and it

just leads to this complete disconnect

because of the lack of confidence that

people think you are someone you're not

because you're not being who you are but

basically this trick I I do it almost

every day before I go to the gym and

it's been so effective you know I'm like

driving to the gym I literally just say

whatever's on my mind you know I try to

Hype myself up a little bit I'm like and

sometimes you can even lie to yourself

while doing this I I was going to the

gym today I'm like I am going to lift

more than anyone else there and then you

know I just bounced off those thoughts

but you know just this taking some time

to say exactly what's on your mind is

going to make everything so real because

when you when you limit your thoughts to

just staying in your brain is we're

getting very deep here but I hope this

makes sense if you limit your thoughts

all the time to what's in your brain and

it's not going to feel real and also so

like no one is ever going to know you

but I think having that ability to say

what's on your mind and just it it's

relaxing almost because you know it

makes whatever you've been bottling up

in your brain feel so much more real so

um yeah I would definitely recommend um

trying this out I don't even like I said

I didn't read it in a book or anything

see see one of those um how to be

confident videos I don't I don't watch

those at all but just the the ability to

say what's on your mind and you know if

you have a friend you trust you can

practice that on a person that's

probably even better but you know if you

want to start from somewhere just take

some time to say exactly what's on your

mind if you're by yourself in a car on a

walk whatever um I think it's really

great um just because you can be

yourself and it it's if someone sees you

doing this they're going to think you're

crazy and you know that's just something

you're going to have to deal with there

was one time I was talking to myself in

the car and then someone looked at me I

was like you you know it just is what it

is I mean if people think you're crazy

temporarily um that's fine but I think

it's so important to get your thoughts

out in any way possible I mean may maybe

for you you'd enjoy journaling more um

making YouTube videos uh anything that

can make your um make your internal

thoughts externalized because it'll make

it feel so much more real and you can

look at your situation more objectively

so um yeah I don't I don't know um if

this is backed by science or anything

this is just something that I've found

personally to be very very helpful so go

um go after you're done this video go um

just say what's on your mind for a

little bit and I think you'll find it's

pretty surprisingly helpful so uh yeah

that's all I got for today's video let

me know your thoughts in the comments

with that being said Peace