Finally getting out of autistic burnout | what is it and how did I overcome it?

Summary

In this video, the creator discusses their personal experience with autistic burnout, a severe mental health crisis affecting the autistic community. They share their journey of recovery, emphasizing the importance of rest, lifestyle changes, and therapy. The creator also provides insight into the challenges of identifying and treating burnout, stressing the need for patience and self-compassion during the healing process.

Takeaways

• 😔 The speaker has been experiencing 'autistic burnout' for over two years, which is a severe state of exhaustion affecting both mental and physical health.
• 🛑 Autistic burnout is not just a feeling of being tired; it's a mental health crisis that can drastically reduce one's functionality and productivity.
• 🏠 The speaker had to move back home with their parents during the burnout phase because they could no longer take care of themselves independently.
• 🔄 Coming out of burnout is a slow process that involves gradually reintroducing responsibilities into one's life to find a sustainable threshold.
• 🤔 There is no one-size-fits-all solution to autistic burnout; it requires lifestyle changes, rest, and potentially therapy.
• 🌱 The speaker emphasizes the importance of making rest a priority and stopping when feeling overwhelmed, despite the internal struggle with guilt or laziness.
• 🧠 The speaker's brain often 'gaslights' them, making them feel like they are lazy or faking their condition, which is a common internal battle for those with burnout.
• 👩‍⚕️ Therapy is crucial for addressing internalized ableism and learning to rest without guilt, which are key steps in recovery.
• 📉 Autistic burnout can be triggered by an unsustainable lifestyle, and recovery involves making necessary adjustments to one's daily routine and expectations.
• 🚫 There is no quick fix for burnout; it requires a long-term commitment to change and rest, which can be frustrating but is essential for recovery.
• 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The speaker suggests leaning on others for support, giving up some responsibilities, and making accommodations to ease the burden during recovery.

Q & A

What is the main topic discussed in the video script?

The main topic discussed in the video script is 'autistic burnout' and the process of recovering from it.

Why has the video creator not made a YouTube video for a month?

The video creator has been tired and has been focusing on rest to avoid falling back into autistic burnout, which has affected their productivity.

What does the video creator mean by 'making rest a priority'?

Making rest a priority means that the video creator is consciously taking breaks and not overworking themselves to prevent a relapse into burnout.

What is the video creator's strategy for slowly reintroducing responsibilities into their life?

The video creator is adding one responsibility every week or every other week, assessing their ability to handle it, and then deciding if they can take on more.

How long has the video creator been recovering from autistic burnout?

The video creator has been recovering from autistic burnout for about 2 and a half years.

What does the video creator define 'autistic burnout' as?

Autistic burnout is defined as a mental health crisis that autistic people experience, affecting the entire nervous system and drastically changing functionality, productivity, and emotions.

Why do some autistic individuals not realize they are autistic until they experience burnout?

Some autistic individuals may not realize they are autistic until they experience burnout because the symptoms can mirror other mental health issues like depression, leading them to seek medical attention and receive a diagnosis.

What lifestyle changes did the video creator make to help recover from autistic burnout?

The video creator gave up many responsibilities, such as cooking and housework, and relied more on their parents for support during the recovery process.

What role does therapy play in the recovery from autistic burnout according to the video creator?

Therapy plays a crucial role in addressing internalized ableism, learning to rest without guilt, and working through mental health issues associated with autistic burnout.

Why is it important not to rush the recovery process from autistic burnout?

Rushing the recovery process can lead to taking on too many responsibilities too quickly, which can push the individual back into burnout and undo the progress made.

What advice does the video creator give for managing the desire to return to the previous lifestyle before burnout?

The video creator advises adjusting goals and expectations, as the previous lifestyle may not be sustainable and changes need to be made for a healthier and more balanced life.

Outlines

00:00

😥 Overcoming Autistic Burnout: A Personal Journey

The speaker discusses their struggle with autistic burnout, a severe state of mental and physical exhaustion that affects autistic individuals. They explain how they've been working hard to rest and avoid falling back into burnout, emphasizing the importance of recognizing one's limits and taking a slow, strategic approach to recovery. The speaker is in the process of reintroducing responsibilities into their life, collaborating with a therapist and family to find a sustainable lifestyle. They also provide insight into the nature of autistic burnout, distinguishing it from common burnout and explaining its debilitating effects on functionality and emotions.

05:01

🍲 Autistic Burnout's Impact on Daily Life and the Need for Lifestyle Changes

The speaker elaborates on the drastic impact of autistic burnout on their ability to perform everyday tasks, such as cooking and self-care, which led to a dependency on others. They describe the confusion and emotional toll that comes with this sudden loss of functionality, both for themselves and for those around them. The speaker stresses the importance of lifestyle changes and rest in overcoming burnout, noting the absence of a one-size-fits-all solution. They share their personal experience of giving up responsibilities and seeking help from family to manage daily tasks, highlighting the difficulty of accepting help and the necessity of mental rest and therapy.

10:03

🛌 The Importance of Rest and Therapy in Healing from Autistic Burnout

The speaker emphasizes the necessity of rest and therapy in the recovery process from autistic burnout. They discuss the challenge of achieving true rest, especially when one's own thoughts can hinder the process. The speaker shares their journey of learning to rest without guilt or self-punishment, facilitated by therapy that addresses internalized ableism and the societal pressure to be constantly productive. They also caution against the desire to quickly return to one's previous lifestyle, advising that realistic goal adjustments and a gradual reintroduction of responsibilities are crucial for sustainable recovery.

15:05

🚫 Avoiding the Pitfalls of Rushing Recovery from Autistic Burnout

In the final paragraph, the speaker warns against the pitfalls of rushing the recovery process from autistic burnout. They recount personal experiences of prematurely resuming responsibilities, which led to a relapse into burnout. The speaker advises taking the time to heal properly and not to force oneself to return to a previous lifestyle that may have contributed to the burnout in the first place. They conclude by offering reassurance and support to those struggling with autistic burnout, underscoring the importance of therapy and the promise of improvement over time.

Keywords

💡Autistic Burnout

Autistic burnout is a term used to describe a severe state of mental and physical exhaustion experienced by individuals on the autism spectrum. It is characterized by a significant decline in the ability to perform daily tasks and can lead to a crisis in mental health. In the video, the speaker discusses their personal experience with autistic burnout, highlighting the challenges of recovery and the importance of understanding this condition as distinct from typical burnout.

💡Rest

Rest is a vital component in the recovery process from autistic burnout. It refers to both physical and mental downtime necessary for the body and mind to recover from overexertion. The video emphasizes the importance of rest in healing, as the speaker shares their struggle with feeling guilty about resting and the need to prioritize it as part of their recovery strategy.

💡Therapy

Therapy is a key element in addressing autistic burnout, as it helps individuals work through internalized ableism and other mental health issues that may contribute to the condition. The speaker mentions the importance of therapy in their recovery, especially in learning to rest without guilt and in understanding the need for lifestyle changes.

💡Lifestyle Changes

Lifestyle changes refer to the adjustments made to one's daily routine and responsibilities to reduce stress and promote recovery from autistic burnout. The video script discusses the necessity of making such changes, as the speaker's previous lifestyle was deemed unsustainable and contributed to their burnout.

💡Responsibilities

Responsibilities in the context of the video refer to the various tasks and duties that one has in their life, such as work, household chores, and self-care. The speaker talks about the need to reassess and potentially reduce these responsibilities to manage the load and prevent further burnout.

💡Threshold

Threshold, in this context, represents the limit of an individual's capacity to handle stress or responsibilities without experiencing negative effects. The speaker is unsure of their threshold after burnout and is cautiously adding responsibilities to find their new limit.

💡Mental Health Crisis

A mental health crisis is a period of intense psychological distress or dysfunction that can result in a reduced ability to cope with everyday life. The video describes autistic burnout as a type of mental health crisis that affects the entire nervous system and significantly alters an individual's functionality.

💡Neurodivergence

Neurodivergence refers to the idea that neurological differences, such as autism, are variations in human wiring rather than disorders that need to be cured. The speaker mentions working with a therapist who understands neurodivergence, indicating the importance of recognizing and accepting these differences in the context of autistic burnout.

💡Internalized Ableism

Internalized ableism is the process by which individuals with disabilities come to accept and internalize societal prejudices against their own conditions. The speaker discusses the need to address this in therapy as part of their recovery from autistic burnout, as it can contribute to feelings of guilt and self-blame for needing to rest.

💡Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where a person is made to doubt their own perceptions, memories, or sanity. In the video, the speaker mentions their brain 'gaslighting' them by suggesting they are lazy or faking their need for rest, which is a harmful internal dialogue that can exacerbate the feelings of guilt associated with autistic burnout.

💡Sustainability

Sustainability in the context of the video relates to the ability of an individual's lifestyle to be maintained over the long term without causing harm or depletion. The speaker reflects on their previous unsustainable lifestyle that contributed to their burnout and the need to establish a more sustainable way of living.

Highlights

The speaker has not made a YouTube video for a month due to exhaustion and the desire to avoid falling into autistic burnout.

They are currently prioritizing rest to recover from a period of burnout that lasted over two years.

The process of recovery involves slowly reintroducing responsibilities to find a sustainable lifestyle.

The speaker collaborates with a therapist and parents to manage the recovery process.

Autistic burnout is described as a mental health crisis that affects the entire nervous system and functionality.

It is differentiated from casual burnout and can trigger depression.

Many autistic individuals discover their condition after experiencing burnout and seeking medical help.

During burnout, the speaker lost the ability to perform basic self-care tasks, leading to a return to living with parents.

Autistic burnout can be confusing and scary, with both internal and external gaslighting.

There is no one-size-fits-all solution to autistic burnout; it requires lifestyle changes and rest.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of giving up certain responsibilities to alleviate burnout.

Therapy is crucial for addressing internalized ableism and learning to rest without guilt.

Adjusting expectations and setting new, realistic goals is part of the recovery process.

The healing process should not be rushed, as pushing oneself too quickly can lead to a relapse.

The speaker shares their personal experience of relapsing after trying to rush the recovery process.

The video concludes with reassurance that recovery from autistic burnout is possible with the right approach.

Transcripts

hello long time no see I haven't filmed

a YouTube video in like a month well it

probably doesn't feel like that for you

because they were like pre plan to

upload but yeah it's been a while I've

been

tired I I don't know what else to say

I've been tired I've been working really

hard to allow myself to rest and not

feel guilty about it um and I I've been

really worried about falling back into

autistic burnout and so I'm making rest

a priority and when I feel like I'm

doing too much I make myself stop which

is really difficult because my brain

likes to Gaslight me and say you are

being lazy you're you're faking this

keep keep going um yeah my brain is not

nice but you know that's what therapy is

for today I want to talk about autistic

burnout because I am finally coming out

of it after 2 years 2 and 1/ half years

something around that when I say that

I'm coming out of burnout what I mean by

that is that I am no longer in that

debilitated depressed burnt out state

but I am not 100% yet I am in the

process of getting there because like I

said it is a very very slow process I am

slowly adding responsibilities back into

my life because my previous lifestyle

was not sustainable very obviously not

sustainable but now I don't know what is

sustainable so I'm adding like one

responsibility every week or every other

week seeing if I can handle that saying

okay this is good I can handle this let

me add something else because I don't

know where my threshold is and so I I

need to be very careful because if I add

too many things too quickly and I crash

I still don't know where my threshold is

so I'm I'm trying to take it very slow

very strategic I'm working both both

with my therapist and with my parents

with this because this is going to be a

long process I think it's been a month

and a half of Me Slowly adding

responsibilities back in and I've only

gotten up to like four responsibilities

it is annoying because I just I just

want to be done I just want to have all

my responsibilities I just want to be

outliving my life but I know that I

don't know where my threshold is and I

know that I need to take it very slowly

before I get into how I got out of

autistic burnout I first want to give

just a little rundown of like what

autistic burnout really is because a lot

of people aren't aware and that is a

okay um when I say autistic burnout

people that don't know what it is think

oh burnout yeah I get burnt out

sometimes too and it is far different

from just casual burnout I just like the

name autistic burnout because it leads

people to assume oh yeah I get burned

out sometimes too I understand what

you're experienc ing because it it's not

burnout I would Define it as like a

mental health crisis that autistic

people experience because it it's so

much more than that it it affects your

entire nervous system it disrupts your

brain and your body and it drastically

changes your functionality and

productivity and your emotions and the

way that you experience things it

mirrors depression a lot of the time it

looks a lot like depression because is

you are suddenly struggling to do things

you're really tired you're really burnt

out you're having outof character

outbursts but with burnout it it's a

state of like extreme exhaustion rather

than like depression now don't get me

wrong you can experience like both at

the same time for me autistic burnout

triggers depression so I experience both

kind of at the same time but they are

two different things a lot of autistic

people don't find out that they are

autistic until they they hit autistic

burnout and seek medical attention and

that's what happened to me I was just

living my life not knowing I was

autistic and then I hit autistic burnout

when I was in college um and I didn't

know that it was autistic burnout I

thought I was experiencing depression or

some Mental Health crisis and I se help

and after about a year of um trying to

figure out what was wrong I was

diagnosed with autism and they were like

oh autistic burnout uh so yeah was in

autistic burnout for so long because I

wasn't treating it like autistic burnout

I wasn't helping myself with the

autistic Brown out because I didn't know

what was happening so I think that can

be a big factor in the reason why it

takes so long for people to come out of

it is because for a big chunk of time

they probably don't know that that's

what they're experiencing autistic

burnout can be a very scary and

confusing thing to experience um

especially if you don't know that that's

what's happening to you because you lose

a lot of your functionality when you

fall into burnout you can no longer do

things that you used to be able to do

and it's very confusing and upsetting to

experience like I loved to cook for

myself and when I fell into burnout I

could no longer cook I could no longer

feed myself it got to a point where my

parents had to move me back home because

I couldn't take care of myself when I

was previously living independently so

it's it's weird to all of a sudden like

have to rely on other people and

obviously that is a weird like ego

mental confusion to happen but it's also

confusing for people that are watching

this like what do you mean you can't do

that I saw you do it last year I saw

you've been doing it your whole life

other people don't understand as well

like you don't understand what's

happening and other people don't

understand what's happening so there can

be a lot of gaslighting both from other

people and like from your own brain and

it's just confusing and scary and

exhausting and you don't know what's

happening I'm like laughing about this

but like it was it was so scary when it

was happening I just I have to I have to

make light of it now you know if you're

watching this video right now you're

probably like yeah I know I'm

experiencing autistic burnout I know

it's scary I know it's confusing how do

I get out of it because that was my

question for like a year and a half well

yeah okay I'm experiencing autistic

burnout what do I do how do I help

myself the thing that sucks about

autistic burnout oh hi eie okay Evee

might be joining

us um the thing that sucks about

autistic burn out is that there is no

one fix like other mental health issues

you know if you have anxiety you can

take anti-anxiety medication if you have

depression you can take anti-depressive

medication autistic burnout doesn't have

like a fix a therapy a drug the thing

that helps autistic burnout is lifestyle

changes and rest and you might be saying

Lifestyle Changes like I I can't change

anything about my life I have

responsibilities I have things to do I

have this I have that my job you need to

make some sort of lifestyle change

because the reason that you are in

Burnout is because your life is not

sustainable for you you are doing too

much your lifestyle is not sustainable

there's something that needs to give you

cannot continue putting this much effort

into all the things that you have going

on and I know that this can be extremely

difficult because a lot of us autistics

hit autistic burnout when we're adults

and we have jobs we might have kids we

have spouses like we have things that we

need to do we have bills to pay you know

that kind of stuff so I understand how

like daunting it can be like what do you

mean I need to change things about my

life I can't I I have stuff to do and I

know but there are things that you can

do that you might not be thinking about

find little things in your life that you

can give up responsibilities that you

can give up and it it won't drastically

change your life um and find a

accommodations to things that you need

to keep in your life now I'm in a

slightly different position when I hit

autistic burnout I was 20 years old I

was a college student I was still

relying a lot on my parents so I gave up

a lot of responsibilities and gave it

back to them I gave up cooking I gave up

a lot of housework I gave up a lot of

scheduling of myself I gave a lot of

that back to my mom and said can you

please help me can you can you cook

little bit for me to make sure that I'm

still eating can you do my laundry

sometimes because that's too much can

you help me with this and that around

the house and it was very hard to give

these things up because I felt lazy I

felt like I was putting so much on my

mom but she saw how much I needed help

and she was willing to do it so I'm sure

there are people in your life that you

can lean on and give some

responsibilities to and then there's the

mental rest if you're anything like me

you're going to need to go to therapy

and work through like internalized

ableism and like I'm not lazy I can rest

and it's okay um before you can get to

the place of actually resting because uh

for me I would try to rest and my brain

would tell me really mean things and

just be very not nice to me and so even

though I was sitting on the couch

resting I was not resting because my

brain was just spiraling and I was

you know it was taking up so much mental

energy like fighting my own mental

battles so after a lot of therapy I can

now say that I'm not perfect but I can I

can rest and not beat myself up over it

and look when I say you need to rest to

overcome autistic burnout it's it's a

lot of rest it's not oh yeah like I just

slept and watched TV and you know did a

little hobby for like a week straight

like I've rested no it it's it's like

years it can be very annoying because

like a year into autistic burnout I was

like I've rested I've I've done it can I

be done now and my brain was like nope

we are still tired and I was like oh my

gosh how long is this going to take like

I'm tired of resting I want to get back

to my life I am bored and that mental

I'm bored I need to get back to my life

can cause its own set of M Health

spiraling out of control thoughts cuz

it's like you really feel like you're

going to be stuck in this place in this

state forever and you know that that can

cause the depression to sink in feeling

like you're going to be stuck like that

forever and you're never going to be

able to do the things that you once did

yeah that's that's depressing I promise

you it will get better but if you are

trying to get back to the life that you

were living before autistic burnout I

can tell you right now you're going to

need to adjust your goals because the

life that you were living before is not

the life that you should be living you

are in this state that you are in right

now because of that lifestyle that you

are living you need to change things

about your lifestyle and that can be a

hard pill to swallow I fought that for a

very long time I was like no I liked my

life I want to get back to it I don't

want to give anything up I was happy I

was doing things I don't want to not do

those things anymore like I like that

lifestyle and I was trying to get back

to that when that was an unrealistic

expectation and obviously I wasn't

meeting that standard and so I was

getting frustrated with myself so it

took a really long time to readjust my

expectations and set new goals that were

actually realistic for myself usually I

write a script and like read off the

script when I'm filming a you YouTube

video but today I was like I don't need

a script I can do this all off the top

of my head so I'm sorry if this is a

little all over the place and I'm just

going to reiterate some of my points

because I'm worried that I just babbled

a bunch to get out of autistic burnout

you got to give up responsibilities it

could be big things it could be little

things doesn't matter but like clearly

something's got to give so you might

want to start choosing what to give up

before you get to a point where you can

no longer get out of bed and you have to

give things up you don't want to get to

that space I tried to keep all of my

responsibilities and said I didn't want

to give anything up and it got to the

point where I could no longer get out of

bed and I was living independently and

my parents had to come and get me and

bring me home because I could physically

not take care of myself I couldn't

shower I couldn't eat I couldn't

remember what day it was and I had to

give up all of my responsibilities my

parents were like you can't take care of

yourself we are doing everything for you

and they just like kind of took all my

responsibilities from me and that felt

horrible I felt like I was useless that

made me very depressed you don't want to

get to that state start giving things up

start giving up responsibilities that

you want to give up rather than being

forced to give everything up the next

thing you need to do is accommodate

yourself make life easier for you I know

that it's impossible to give up some

responsibilities but put things in place

that make it easier maybe you rely on

another person to help you with things

maybe

you buy accommodations that help you

with that thing whatever it is you need

to be accommodating yourself more the

third thing is you need to go to therapy

if you're not in therapy already you're

going to you're going to need to find a

therapist preferably a therapist that

understands neurod divergency if they're

an autistic therapist that's even better

because there's going to be a lot of

internalized ableism that you're going

to have to work through because you are

going to say what do you mean I can no

longer do this thing I've been doing it

my whole life I can push on I can keep

going but no you can't you you need help

and you are disabled and it's okay that

you might not be able to do that thing

like there's just a lot of mental crap

that you need to work through also

learning how to rest and not beating

yourself up and not feeling guilty or

lazy or gaslighting yourself like

there's there's just so much that you're

going to need to unpack and then the

fourth thing is rest

and like I said you think you might be

rested but you probably need more rest

and then the last thing that I want to

touch on is don't move too quickly Don't

force yourself and try to rush the

healing getting out of burnout process

because it is a process and it is going

to take a long time if you try to rush

it you're going to take on too many

responsibilities too quickly and you're

going to push yourself back far further

deeper into burnout that's happened to

me a couple times in the burnout

recovery process I thought I was getting

better I was feeling better I was

feeling rested and I was like this is

wonderful I'm better let me go do all

these things let me take back my

responsibilities let me go see my

friends let me go do this let me go do

that and I would maybe get a couple days

or like a week and then I would Crash

and Burn again because I was not fully

recovered and I just wanted to get back

to my life so badly that I was pushing

myself I was doing too many things and I

was not yet recovered and it sent me

further into burnout and I kind of had

to start all over again so it takes time

I think that's all for today's video my

apologies if this is all over the place

but yeah if if you are struggling with

autistic burnout um You Are Not Alone it

will get better even though your brain

likes to tell you that it won't and um

if you're not in therapy please please

go to

therapy um so yeah bye

guys