Surround yourself with the right people | Buddhism In English

Buddhism
22 Jun 202407:00

Summary

TLDRThe video script emphasizes the importance of one's environment and associations in personal growth, drawing a parallel to a seed's growth in fertile or infertile soil. It highlights Buddhist teachings that stress the value of 'kalana' or noble friends who inspire and guide towards positive actions and inner values like love, compassion, and patience. The speaker encourages viewers to seek and maintain connections with individuals of higher qualities, as they can significantly influence personal development, even in unfavorable environments. The message is that our choices in companionship can profoundly shape our lives, echoing the adage that we become the average of the five people we associate with most.

Takeaways

  • 🌱 The growth of a seed is influenced by its environment, which is a metaphor for how our surroundings affect our personal growth and values.
  • πŸ™Œ In Buddhism, the company we keep is considered crucial to our spiritual development, emphasizing the importance of associating with good friends.
  • πŸ—£οΈ Buddha taught that the entirety of Buddhist practice relies on having good friends, or 'kalana', who guide us towards virtuous actions and personal betterment.
  • ❀️ Noble friends are those who inspire and support us in cultivating inner values such as love, compassion, patience, and adherence to the Dharma.
  • πŸ™ The presence of noble friends in our lives is seen as a blessing, as they help us improve and grow, according to Buddhist teachings.
  • πŸ”„ It's important to avoid toxic environments and seek out relationships with individuals who possess higher qualities and values.
  • πŸ§˜β€β™‚οΈ Living in a community with a shared goal of spiritual practice, such as monks, can facilitate the cultivation of inner qualities more easily.
  • 🌿 Just as a plant's growth can be limited by its pot, our potential can be constrained by the environment and the people around us.
  • 🌳 If even one root of a plant extends beyond its pot and reaches more fertile ground, the plant can grow significantly; similarly, connecting with one good person can greatly influence our growth.
  • 🀝 We should cherish and maintain connections with those who inspire us and help us develop our inner qualities, even if we are in a less-than-ideal environment.
  • πŸ”’ The saying 'you are the average of the five people you associate with' highlights the importance of being selective with our friendships and associations.

Q & A

  • What analogy is used to explain the impact of environment on personal growth?

    -The analogy of planting a healthy seed in infertile soil or a small pot is used to explain that the seed will not grow properly due to the environment, not because of any flaw in the seed itself.

  • How does the environment or people around us affect our qualities and values according to the script?

    -The environment and people around us can negatively impact our good qualities and inner values, making it crucial to surround ourselves with supportive and positive individuals.

  • What is the importance of association in Buddhist teachings?

    -In Buddhist teachings, the association is considered highly important as it is believed that the entire Buddhist practice depends on having good friends who support and encourage one's spiritual growth.

  • Who are 'kalana' or noble friends in Buddhism?

    -Noble friends, or 'kalana,' are individuals who direct us towards good actions, help us become better people, and cultivate inner values such as love, compassion, patience, and the practice of Dharma.

  • What did Venable Ananda and the Buddha say about the role of association in Buddhist practice?

    -Venable Ananda initially suggested that half of Buddhist practice depends on who we associate with, but the Buddha corrected him, stating that the entire practice depends on having good friends.

  • What advice does the Buddha give about choosing associates?

    -The Buddha advises not to associate with people of lower qualities but to associate with those of higher qualities, as they can help improve one's life and spiritual practice.

  • How does living with a community of monks help in spiritual practice?

    -Living with a community of monks who share the same aim of practicing inner qualities like love, compassion, and meditation makes it easier for individuals to practice and be inspired by the senior monks' dedication.

  • What is the suggested solution for those living in toxic environments?

    -For those in toxic environments, the suggestion is to maintain connections with people of better qualities whenever possible and to be inspired by them to develop inner qualities despite the surrounding negativity.

  • What analogy is used to explain the importance of connecting with good people even in a limited environment?

    -The analogy of a bonsai plant's root reaching outside its pot and connecting with the ground is used to illustrate how even one connection with a better person can significantly help one's growth.

  • What does it mean to be 'the average of five people you associate with'?

    -Being 'the average of five people you associate with' means that the qualities and values of the people closest to you have a significant influence on your own character and behavior, emphasizing the importance of choosing associates wisely.

Outlines

00:00

🌱 The Impact of Environment on Growth

This paragraph discusses the analogy of a seed planted in infertile soil and its inability to grow, drawing a parallel to human life. It emphasizes that the environment and the company we keep can significantly influence our inherent qualities and values. The teachings of Buddha are highlighted, particularly the importance of associating with 'noble friends' or 'kalana'β€”individuals who inspire us to do good and cultivate virtues like love, compassion, and patience. The Buddha's assertion that the full practice of Buddhism depends on having good friends is underscored, illustrating that being surrounded by like-minded individuals can greatly facilitate spiritual growth and practice.

05:03

🌳 Nurturing Connections for Personal Growth

The second paragraph extends the analogy of a plant's growth, explaining how a single root connecting with the ground can lead to significant development. It suggests that even a single connection with a person of good qualities can profoundly impact one's life, encouraging the maintenance of such relationships despite a potentially toxic environment. The paragraph stresses the importance of choosing our associates wisely, as we become a reflection of the people we spend time with. It concludes with the idea that maintaining connections with individuals who can help us improve is essential for personal development, reinforcing the notion that our growth is influenced by the company we keep.

Mindmap

Keywords

πŸ’‘Seed

A seed is the unit of plant reproduction from which new plants grow. In the context of the video, it symbolizes potential and the need for a nurturing environment to flourish. The script uses the analogy of a seed planted in fertile or infertile soil to illustrate how external conditions can affect growth and development, just as one's environment can influence personal growth.

πŸ’‘Environment

Environment refers to the surroundings or conditions in which a person, plant, or animal lives or operates and which affect their development, survival, and performance. The video emphasizes that the environment, including the people around us, can significantly impact our inner values and personal growth, as illustrated by the seed analogy and the teachings of Buddha.

πŸ’‘Good Qualities

Good qualities are positive attributes or characteristics that are valued in individuals, such as kindness, honesty, and compassion. The script mentions that even with good qualities within us, they can be affected by our environment, highlighting the importance of nurturing these traits in a supportive setting.

πŸ’‘Buddhist Teachings

Buddhist teachings encompass the spiritual and philosophical principles of Buddhism that guide individuals towards enlightenment. The video discusses the emphasis on associating with good people as a key aspect of Buddhist practice, as it helps in cultivating inner values and spiritual growth.

πŸ’‘Kalana (Noble Friends)

In Buddhism, 'Kalana' or noble friends are individuals who inspire and guide others towards positive actions and personal development. The video explains that having such friends is considered a blessing, as they help in cultivating virtues like love, compassion, and patience, and in practicing the Dharma.

πŸ’‘Dharma

Dharma, in Buddhist context, refers to the teachings of the Buddha, the path of righteousness, and the principles that guide one towards spiritual awakening. The script mentions practicing the Dharma as one of the ways noble friends assist in personal development and spiritual practice.

πŸ’‘Monks Community

A monks community refers to a group of monastic practitioners living together, often in a monastery, with a shared purpose of spiritual development. The video uses the example of living in a monks community to illustrate the ease of practicing virtues like meditation and compassion when surrounded by like-minded individuals.

πŸ’‘Meditation

Meditation is a practice of focusing the mind and achieving a mentally clear and emotionally calm state. In the script, meditation is highlighted as a challenging practice that becomes more accessible and inspiring when done within a supportive community of senior monks.

πŸ’‘Toxic Environment

A toxic environment refers to a setting where negative influences, behaviors, or attitudes can hinder personal growth and well-being. The video acknowledges the challenge of finding good friends in such environments but encourages seeking out and maintaining connections with those who have higher values.

πŸ’‘Association

Association in the context of the video refers to the act of being in contact or having relationships with others. It is emphasized as crucial for personal development, as the people we associate with can greatly influence our values and behaviors, as stated in the saying 'you are the average of the five people you associate with.'

πŸ’‘Inner Values

Inner values are the deeply held beliefs and principles that guide one's actions and decisions. The video discusses the importance of cultivating inner values such as love, compassion, and patience, which are nurtured through association with noble friends and practicing the Dharma.

Highlights

A healthy seed planted in an infertile environment will not grow, illustrating the impact of surroundings on personal development.

In Buddhist teachings, the environment and the people around us can affect our inner values and qualities.

The Buddha emphasized that the entirety of Buddhist practice depends on having good friends, known as 'kalana' or noble friends.

Noble friends are those who guide us towards good actions and help cultivate inner values such as love, compassion, and patience.

Buddha's teachings consider having good friends as a blessing that aids in personal improvement.

Buddha advises not to associate with people of lower qualities but to seek those with higher values.

Living in a community of like-minded monks facilitates the practice of meditation and spiritual development.

The example of senior monks meditating for long hours inspires junior monks to cultivate their practice.

Being in a toxic environment can be a challenge, but it's important to connect with people of better qualities when possible.

Even in unfavorable conditions, one should strive to maintain connections with individuals who inspire and help improve oneself.

A single connection with a person of good qualities can be a catalyst for personal growth, similar to a plant's root connecting with the ground.

The importance of choosing who we associate with wisely, as it shapes who we are.

The saying 'you are the average of the five people you associate with' highlights the influence of our social circle.

The transcript encourages us to be keen in selecting friends and associates who can contribute positively to our lives.

Maintaining connections with individuals who inspire us to improve is crucial for personal development.

The transcript concludes with the message that our environment does not define us if we have valuable connections with better individuals.

Transcripts

play00:00

Nam

play00:01

budhay if you take a healthy seed and

play00:05

plant it in an infertile pot or in

play00:08

fertile soil what will happen to the

play00:11

seed Slowly by slowly it will start to

play00:15

die it will never

play00:18

grow the problem was not in the seed the

play00:21

problem was in the environment same goes

play00:24

with our life although we are good

play00:27

people although we have good qualities

play00:29

inside us

play00:30

the environment or the people around us

play00:33

can affect the good qualities and can

play00:36

affect our inner values and that is why

play00:38

in Buddhist

play00:40

teachings the biggest amount of focus is

play00:44

given for the people who we associate at

play00:47

one time Venable Anand as from the

play00:50

Buddha says to the Buddha the Buddha I

play00:52

think half of this Buddhist practice

play00:55

depends on who we associate or half of

play00:58

the Buddhist practice depends on good

play01:01

friends then the Buddha said Ananda do

play01:04

not say that Anand the full Buddhist

play01:08

practice the fullest Buddhist practice

play01:10

depends on the whole Buddhist practice

play01:13

depends on having good friends and

play01:16

having better friends in Buddhism we

play01:18

call them

play01:19

kalana the noble friends so who are

play01:23

noble friends Noble friends are the

play01:26

friends who you who they direct you to

play01:29

do do good things and to be a better

play01:32

person and to cultivate the inner values

play01:35

like love compassion patience and

play01:38

practicing the Dharma all these things

play01:42

the people who help you to develop these

play01:44

things so in the Buddha's teachings

play01:46

having good friends around you is

play01:49

considered as a blessing to your life

play01:52

the Buddha says this in

play01:54

Maham the Buddha says

play02:00

that means the Buddha said do not

play02:03

associate with people with lower

play02:06

qualities associate with people with

play02:08

higher good qualities okay having a good

play02:11

association with people who have higher

play02:14

values and higher qualities will help

play02:16

you to improve in your life and that is

play02:18

why in the Buddhist teachings a major

play02:21

focus is given to the people who we

play02:24

associate even in the monks Community

play02:27

when we are living with monks monks live

play02:29

in a one in one aim with a one aim to

play02:33

practice the inner qualities like love

play02:35

and compassion sharing meditations and

play02:38

spiritual practice when you're being

play02:41

around such a community it is very easy

play02:44

for you to practice it now when I was

play02:47

when I begin the practice of the monks

play02:49

Hood it was a it was a challenge for us

play02:52

to practice these qualities like

play02:54

meditation for an example it was very

play02:57

difficult to meditate in the beginning

play02:59

but we had group meditations that means

play03:02

our senior monks meditated with us okay

play03:06

we were sitting with the senior monks

play03:07

and we were meditating and we see from

play03:10

the beginning of of our monkhood we saw

play03:13

that our senior monks are meditating for

play03:16

hours and hours and that inspired us to

play03:20

meditate so having and being with a

play03:23

community of people who are likeminded

play03:25

and being with people who can help you

play03:28

to improve

play03:30

is a blessing for all of our life now

play03:33

when I say this I know the question that

play03:36

comes to your mind how can I have people

play03:38

around me that are that helps me to

play03:40

improve okay because I live in a toxic

play03:43

environment maybe you're living in a

play03:45

toxic environment now that is the

play03:47

problem that we most of the other people

play03:50

have right and then you may ask like I

play03:52

am living in a toxic environment so how

play03:55

can I find good friends and how can I

play03:58

find people who are going to help me

play04:01

well I know we don't get the exact

play04:04

environment that we expect all the time

play04:07

there will be always toxic people around

play04:10

us there will be always unfavorable

play04:13

environments around around us okay but

play04:18

from time to time we get into contact

play04:21

with people with better qualities and

play04:24

better people and with higher values and

play04:27

do not lose that

play04:30

Association connect with them be with

play04:33

them inspired get inspired with them and

play04:36

then associate keep associating those

play04:39

people from time to time the more you

play04:42

associate them the more you develop the

play04:44

inner qualities it's something like this

play04:47

if you grow a plant in a little pot

play04:51

right for an example if you take a

play04:53

bonide plant it grows in a little pot

play04:56

right so the environment is limited the

play04:59

soil is limited okay so what happens to

play05:03

the tree it doesn't grow much okay it

play05:06

starts to start to grow slowly but

play05:10

because of that is because of the

play05:11

environment that is because the roots

play05:14

are stuck in that little amount of

play05:17

soil what will happen if one just one

play05:21

root came out of that pot and got

play05:24

connected with the ground what will

play05:26

happen the tree starts to grow

play05:30

same like that we will if you get one

play05:34

connection just one connection with a

play05:37

better person or a better person who has

play05:40

good qualities and who can help you you

play05:42

should not lose that connection right

play05:46

you have to be connected with that

play05:48

person and you have to grow and that

play05:50

will help you to grow in your life so

play05:53

then the environment that you live in

play05:56

will not matter to you because you have

play05:59

that valuable connection with that one

play06:01

person okay and that is why we need to

play06:05

choose the people who we associate

play06:07

wisely because who we are is the people

play06:12

are the people who we associate and that

play06:14

is why they say that you are the average

play06:17

of five people who you associate just

play06:21

look around the people who are living

play06:23

with you okay just look around the

play06:25

people who you share your life and see

play06:28

you're the average of those five people

play06:31

who who are very close to you so that is

play06:34

why we need to be very wise and very

play06:37

keen when we pick friends and when we

play06:40

pick people to associate and if you got

play06:43

one just one connection with a person

play06:46

who has better qualities and good

play06:49

qualities that who can help you to

play06:51

improve never lose that connection be

play06:54

connected with that person and improve

play06:57

yourself Nam buddhaya

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Related Tags
BuddhismPersonal GrowthEnvironmentAssociationsInner ValuesCompassionMeditationCommunityInspirationNoble FriendsLife Improvement