Harsh Truths About Attraction EVERY Man Should Know

Summary

This video discusses key insights on dating, attraction, and personal experiences. The speaker explores concepts like phenotypes versus objective attraction, emphasizing how people may prioritize certain physical archetypes over objective beauty. He also talks about the diminishing returns of improving one's looks beyond a certain point, the balance of paying for dates with time or money, the importance of genuine desire, and how status impacts dating success. The speaker concludes by highlighting how the quality of women one keeps reflects their life situation and overall attractiveness.

Takeaways

• 😎 Phenotypes are about how you look (like a certain celebrity), while objective attraction is about general attractiveness regardless of phenotype.
• 🧐 Average-looking faces are often considered highly attractive because they represent a balance of features that are deemed pleasing.
• 🌏 Phenotype attraction varies across different races and cultures, with some preferring certain archetypes over others.
• 📈 Once you reach a certain level of attractiveness, further improvements yield diminishing returns in terms of dating success.
• 💸 Attracting women often involves an investment of time and/or money, with high-status individuals potentially requiring less of an investment.
• 🚫 Cutting back on logistics like dates and spending can limit the type of women you attract, often leading to less serious or committed relationships.
• ❤️ Genuine desire, driven by raw physical attraction, is considered the purest form of attraction and is distinct from attraction based on status or personality.
• 📱 Online dating strategies focusing on receiving messages first can be more effective as they indicate a higher level of genuine desire from the woman.
• 💼 A man's lifestyle and success can significantly impact his ability to retain women in his life, beyond just initial physical attraction.
• 🔄 Looks-maxing or improving one's physical appearance can help attract women without relying on status or wealth.

Q & A

What is the difference between phenotypes and objective attraction?

Phenotypes refer to the archetypes or physical characteristics like skin color and facial features that classify a person into a specific group. Objective attraction, on the other hand, refers to being universally attractive, regardless of phenotype, based on traits like facial symmetry, bone structure, or overall aesthetics.

How do phenotypes influence attraction according to the script?

The script suggests that some people are more attracted to certain phenotypes or archetypes rather than objective attraction. This means they are drawn to specific looks or characteristics that align with their preferences, regardless of whether the person is objectively attractive.

What is meant by 'average' being highly attractive?

The speaker claims that average-looking faces—those that don't exhibit extreme or unique features—are often considered highly attractive. This 'average' look tends to resemble many people, making it universally appealing.

How does the speaker view their own attractiveness in terms of phenotypes and averageness?

The speaker views themselves as having an 'average' face that resembles many others, which they believe contributes to their attractiveness. They also note that their appeal to women in interracial dating seems to be more related to their phenotype than their objective attractiveness.

What happens when a person reaches a certain level of attractiveness, according to the speaker?

Once a person is considered objectively attractive, around a rating of 7.5 to 8, further improvements in attractiveness (e.g., grooming changes or facial tweaks) yield diminishing returns in terms of attracting more women or gaining more advantages.

What does the speaker mean by 'paying with time or money' in the dating context?

The speaker believes that most men must invest either time or money when pursuing women. Time refers to the hours spent on dates, building rapport, and reaching intimacy, while money refers to the expenses incurred during dating activities.

How does status affect the time/money investment required in dating?

According to the speaker, high-status men (e.g., celebrities) can skip much of the time and financial investment needed to attract women. Their status elevates their desirability to the point where women are willing to engage with them immediately without the typical barriers.

What is 'genuine desire' and how does it differ from other forms of attraction?

Genuine desire is described as a pure, instinctive form of attraction that is primarily physical. It occurs when a woman is so physically drawn to a man that she cannot help but act on it. This differs from attraction based on status, charisma, or other factors that might play a role but aren't purely physical.

Why does the speaker stop messaging women first on dating apps?

The speaker stopped messaging women first because they realized that women who initiated contact were showing genuine desire. This indicated a higher level of physical attraction, which aligned with the speaker’s goal of pursuing women with strong initial attraction.

How does the speaker view the connection between a man's success in life and the women he retains?

The speaker argues that a man's lifestyle, financial status, and overall success play a direct role in his ability to retain women. Attractiveness may get a woman’s attention, but factors like living well and having status help keep her around.