The REAL Reason Guys Stare But Don’t Approach You! | (No, it’s not because he’s scared)

Derrick Jaxn

24 Aug 201804:07

Summary

TLDRThe speaker addresses why some men may look at women without making a move, debunking the misconception that it stems from fear. Instead, he explains that many men expect rejection based on a woman's body language. Factors such as a woman's 'resting face' or her perceived disinterest often deter men from approaching. He also highlights various reasons for hesitation, including men being in relationships or part of a new generation expecting women to take the lead. The speaker offers advice to women on how to signal their interest subtly if they want to be approached.

Takeaways

😎 It's not fear that prevents a man from approaching a woman, but the expectation of rejection based on body language.
💍 Some men look but don't approach because they're in relationships or are trying to respect boundaries.
🤨 Men might avoid making a move if they sense negative body language, such as a resting angry face.
👀 If a man notices a woman with what appears to be a disinterested or unfriendly expression, he will likely not approach.
🙄 Women with resting angry faces tend to reject men more publicly and harshly, discouraging potential advances.
😤 A man's decision not to approach may be influenced by the woman's mood or signals, not necessarily his own fear or insecurity.
💭 Men sometimes overanalyze situations, wondering if a woman is in a bad mood, having a tough day, or just not interested.
😏 Women who want to be approached can give inviting looks or subtle signals to encourage the man to make a move.
👁️ Two common signals from women to encourage approach: a look that says ‘come ask for my number’ or ‘hurry up before time runs out’.
💡 The key reason a man might not approach after staring is not about fear but a calculated decision to avoid wasting time based on the woman's nonverbal cues.

Q & A

Why might a man look at a woman but not approach her?
-It's not necessarily because of fear; rather, it could be due to the expectation of rejection based on the woman's body language.
What could cause a man to not approach even if he is confident?
-He might sense from the woman's body language that she doesn't want to be approached or is having a bad day, so he chooses not to waste either of their time.
What does the speaker say about men who look but don’t make a move?
-The speaker mentions that it’s often due to reasons like the man being in a relationship, respecting boundaries, or misinterpreting the woman’s body language.
How does 'resting [__] face' factor into a man not approaching a woman?
-A woman with 'resting [__] face' may unintentionally give off signals that she doesn't want to be bothered, which discourages a man from approaching her.
Why might a man feel it's not worth approaching a woman with 'resting [__] face'?
-He might fear a public rejection, as women with 'resting [__] face' are perceived as likely to reject someone in a way that others notice.
What advice does the speaker give to women who want to be approached by men?
-Women should try to give off inviting signals, like a friendly smile or playful eye contact, to let the man know they are open to being approached.
What does the speaker say about men who expect women to approach them?
-Some men from the 'new generation' believe that women should be the ones to pursue and court them.
What are two ways a woman can signal to a man that he should approach her?
-One way is to give him a look that says 'Are you going to come over and ask for my name?' The second way is to glance at him with a slight grin as if to say 'You better hurry up if you're going to make a move.'
What does the speaker say about men’s perception of rejection?
-The speaker explains that men often expect rejection based on women’s body language, even if they are confident and not necessarily scared.
How does the speaker suggest a woman can control the outcome of being approached?
-The speaker suggests that a woman can give off welcoming or playful body language if she is interested in being approached, which can influence a man’s decision to make a move.

Outlines

00:00

🧐 Understanding Why Men Stare but Don’t Approach

The video begins by addressing the common question of why men often look at women without making a move. The speaker dismisses the misconception that this behavior is rooted in fear. Instead, he offers alternative explanations, including the possibility that the man is married, taken, or simply respecting his relationship by admiring from a distance. Additionally, he mentions that some men might expect women to initiate contact as part of a newer dating dynamic where men want to be pursued.

🔍 Exploring Motivations Beyond Fear

The speaker elaborates on why decent guys might not approach women they find attractive. It's not about fear but rather the expectation of rejection based on the woman's body language. He explains that men are often aware that women might not want to be bothered, could be having a bad day, or might already be taken. Therefore, they look for signals that indicate whether the woman is open to being approached. If the woman's body language suggests disinterest or hostility, the man is unlikely to make a move.

😠 The Impact of Resting 'RBF' on Approaches

Resting 'RBF' (Resting Bitch Face) is highlighted as a significant factor that deters men from approaching. The speaker describes how this facial expression can be misinterpreted by men as a sign that the woman is not in the mood to be bothered. He explains that women with this expression are perceived as likely to reject advances publicly and harshly, making men wary of approaching them. The speaker acknowledges that some women might have this expression chronically or due to situational factors like stress or annoyance.

🤔 Misinterpretations and Avoidance

The speaker continues to discuss how men interpret and respond to body language and facial expressions. He explains that even if a man finds a woman attractive, he will avoid approaching if he perceives negative signals from her. This avoidance is not due to fear but rather a desire to avoid wasting time and facing potential rejection. The speaker emphasizes that a woman's perceived disinterest does not diminish her attractiveness but prompts the man to move on.

💬 Tips for Women to Signal Interest

For women who are interested in being approached, the speaker offers advice on how to signal openness from a distance. He suggests using inviting eye contact and subtle, friendly facial expressions to encourage men to approach. Specific examples include giving a look that says, 'Are you going to come talk to me?' or a playful, encouraging glance that suggests the man should hurry up and make a move. These signals help men feel more confident that their approach will be welcomed.

👀 Conclusion: It’s Not About Fear

The speaker wraps up by reiterating that men's reluctance to approach is not driven by fear but by a desire to avoid wasting time and facing rejection. He underscores that if a man continues to look at a woman without making a move, it’s likely because he has interpreted her body language as unwelcoming. For women who want to be approached, he advises making their interest clear through positive and inviting body language.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Fear

Fear, in the context of the video, refers to the misconception that men are afraid to approach women. The speaker clarifies that it is not fear of rejection or nervousness that holds a man back but other factors, such as reading a woman's body language. Fear here is contrasted with assumptions about confidence and boldness, indicating that hesitancy may not always stem from insecurity.

💡Body language

Body language is a crucial concept in the video, as it is presented as a key factor influencing whether a man approaches a woman. The speaker explains that men often read a woman's body language to gauge her openness or willingness to engage. Negative signals, like 'resting [__] face,' suggest that the woman does not want to be approached, leading the man to avoid initiating conversation.

💡Resting [__] face

Resting [__] face, also known as 'RBF,' is a slang term used to describe a neutral facial expression that appears unapproachable or displeased. In the video, this expression is cited as a major reason why men may avoid approaching women, as it gives the impression that the woman is not in the mood to be bothered and may reject advances harshly.

💡Rejection

Rejection refers to the act of turning someone down when they approach you, in this case romantically. The video highlights that men are often prepared for rejection, especially when they perceive it through a woman's body language or facial expressions. The speaker makes the point that while rejection is anticipated, it is often misinterpreted as fear.

💡Married or taken

This phrase is used to explain one reason why a man may look at a woman but not approach her. The speaker mentions that if a man is already in a relationship, he might admire from a distance to respect his commitment. This provides a practical reason for not acting on attraction, separating it from fear of rejection.

💡New generation of guys

The 'new generation of guys' refers to men who believe that women should take a more active role in pursuing them. According to the speaker, this group prefers to be chased rather than being the ones to initiate. This mindset is depicted as a shift from traditional dating norms where men typically make the first move.

💡Eye contact

Eye contact is presented as an important non-verbal cue in the video. The speaker suggests that men often use eye contact to determine whether or not they are 'on her radar' before deciding whether to approach. If the woman's body language following eye contact is negative or indifferent, the man is likely to walk away.

💡Admiration from a distance

Admiration from a distance refers to a man looking at a woman but not approaching her, either due to respect for a current relationship or because of unwelcoming signals. The speaker uses this concept to explain that men often evaluate their chances of success before deciding to make a move, and if the signals are not favorable, they admire without acting.

💡Making a move

Making a move refers to a man initiating conversation or interaction with a woman he is interested in. The speaker explains that men often hesitate to make a move not because of fear but because they are waiting for a positive signal or an inviting body language from the woman before approaching.

💡Signals

Signals, in this context, refer to non-verbal cues that men look for when deciding whether to approach a woman. Positive signals, such as a smile or a welcoming expression, encourage men to make a move, while negative signals, like avoiding eye contact or 'resting [__] face,' deter them. The speaker emphasizes that men heavily rely on these signals to gauge a woman's receptiveness.

Highlights

The misconception is that men don't approach women because of fear, but that's often not the case.

A decent guy with confidence may choose not to approach a woman because he expects rejection based on her body language.

A man may refrain from approaching if he thinks the woman is taken or having a bad day.

Resting 'B face' signals to a man that a woman doesn't want to be bothered, even if she isn't intentionally sending that message.

Men often avoid approaching women with resting 'B face' because they assume rejection will be public and embarrassing.

A man may misread a woman's body language, believing she's not interested when she actually may be open to conversation.

Some women have resting 'B face' chronically, while for others, it's situational due to stress or emotions.

Situations that contribute to negative body language include frustrations from social media or financial stress.

A man might admire a woman from a distance and choose not to approach, even if he finds her attractive.

Men sometimes avoid approaching to avoid wasting both their and the woman's time, assuming rejection is inevitable.

If a woman is interested in being approached, subtle cues like eye contact and a grin can encourage a man to make a move.

Women can signal interest by giving a look that says, 'Are you going to ask for my number?' to invite a conversation.

Another subtle signal a woman can use is a look that implies, 'Your time is running out, you better hurry.'

A man’s hesitation to approach isn't necessarily a sign of fear, but more of a judgment based on reading body language.

The conclusion is that if a man looks at a woman but doesn't approach, it’s likely because of perceived rejection, not fear.