Substance Abuse: Hannah's Story
Summary
TLDRThe speaker candidly shares their harrowing journey with substance abuse, beginning in high school with marijuana and escalating to heroin, painkillers, and cocaine. Despite numerous close calls and the tragic death of a close friend, it was a personal revelation that led them to seek help. The narrative emphasizes the importance of understanding the 'why' behind addiction and the transformative power of personal motivation in recovery. The speaker now cherishes their role as a family member and finds beauty in everyday life, with a renewed outlook on the future.
Takeaways
- 🔒 The individual was secretly using drugs, including heroin, behind the backs of their family members.
- 🌿 The person began experimenting with various substances, such as marijuana, alcohol, pain pills, and cocaine, during their freshman year.
- 💉 The first encounter with heroin was during the freshman year, and it had a profound impact, leading to a strong desire to continue using.
- 🎓 The senior year was marked by heavy substance use, with heroin, alcohol, or amphetamines being the primary means of coping.
- 🚨 There were numerous instances where the person's life was at risk, but they survived, highlighting the dangerous nature of their lifestyle.
- 😢 The death of a close friend during the summer had a significant emotional impact, leading to hospitalization.
- 🔄 Despite the tragedy, the person resumed drug use immediately after being discharged from the hospital, indicating a strong addiction.
- 🤔 The individual recognized the need for self-motivated help and understood that detoxification alone was not enough.
- 🧐 There was a realization of the need to understand the 'why' behind the drug use and behavior, which had been suppressed for years.
- 💡 The person's perspective on their future changed from expecting a short life to finding beauty in relationships and roles within the family.
- 🌟 The experiences at 'sbri' (possibly a rehabilitation or support program) were positive and are expected to continue improving.
Q & A
What substance did the speaker start using during their freshman year?
-The speaker started using marijuana, alcohol, pain pills like peret and vicadin, and cocaine during their freshman year.
When did the speaker first try heroin?
-The speaker first tried heroin during their freshman year.
What was the speaker's situation during their senior year?
-During their senior year, the speaker was heavily dependent on drugs, primarily heroin, alcohol, or amphetamines to get through each day.
What significant event occurred during the summer mentioned in the script?
-The speaker's best friend, who they had known for six years, died during that summer.
Why was the speaker admitted to the hospital?
-The speaker was admitted to the hospital because they were a wreck after their best friend's death.
What did the speaker do the day after being discharged from the hospital?
-The day after being discharged, the speaker used drugs again and did not stop.
What realization did the speaker come to regarding seeking help for their addiction?
-The speaker realized that they wouldn't truly get help unless it was their own idea, and it wasn't just about getting off the drugs but understanding why they used them.
What was the speaker's previous outlook on their future before seeking help?
-The speaker used to think they would die by age 30 and would be high for the rest of their life.
What has changed for the speaker after seeking help and experiencing the process of recovery?
-The speaker now finds beauty in the people around them and takes motivation from being able to be a sister and a daughter, roles they didn't think they would fulfill.
What does the speaker expect from their future after going through the recovery process?
-The speaker expects their future to get better and is optimistic about the positive changes they have experienced.
What is the speaker's perspective on the daily work of recovery?
-The speaker acknowledges that recovery is something that has to be worked on every day, indicating a commitment to ongoing self-improvement.
Outlines
💉 Struggle with Addiction
The speaker recounts their journey into drug addiction, beginning with marijuana and alcohol during their freshman year, escalating to painkillers, cocaine, and eventually heroin. They describe their transformation into a 'monster' and the daily struggle to maintain their habit, often behind the backs of their family. The narrative includes the tragic death of a close friend, which led to a hospital admission but did not deter them from continuing to use drugs upon release.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Heroin
💡Addiction
💡Substance Abuse
💡Detox
💡Recovery
💡Self-Harm
💡Support System
💡Motivation
💡Reflection
💡Behavioral Patterns
💡Overcoming Adversity
Highlights
Individual started using heroin daily behind family's back during freshman year.
Began smoking marijuana and drinking heavily in 'fun state'.
First tried pain pills like peret and vicadin, then cocaine.
Heroin use began and individual knew they would continue using.
Senior year involved daily substance use, either heroin, alcohol, or amphetamines.
Survived dangerous situations that should have been fatal.
Best friend died during the summer, leading to hospitalization.
Continued using drugs the day after being discharged from hospital.
Realization of needing to seek help on their own terms.
Detox was just the first step, understanding why they used drugs was crucial.
Suppressed thoughts and emotions about drug use for many years.
Daily work on understanding and overcoming past actions and behaviors.
Used to envision dying by age 30, now sees beauty in life and relationships.
Being a sister, daughter, and having a future is a strong motivation.
Positive experiences and expectations of continued improvement.
Transcripts
I was shooting heroin every day I was
doing it behind my mom's back my
family's back I just became a
monster when I was a
freshman that was like the fun State you
know that's when I really started
smoking good weed drinking heavier and
um I tried pain pills like peret and
vicadin for the first time I tried
cocaine for the first time and so year I
tried heroin for the first time I always
wanted to feel that way and I knew from
that moment like I'm definitely going to
like this and I didn't want to
[Music]
stop my senior year I
was wow I don't really remember a lot of
it I know if I didn't have heroin it was
definitely alcohol or it was um
amphetamines to get me through I would
improvise but it was pretty much every
day that summer I was pushing my pushing
my luck there should have been a dozen
times where I should be dead and you
know one of my best friends that I've
had for the past six years she died that
summer I got admitted into a hospital
because I was just a wreck after she
died and then when I got out the next
day I used and I didn't
stop I don't know what inside me
push myself to get help like my own help
but I knew that I wasn't going to get
help truly unless it was my
idea it wasn't just like getting off the
drugs like detox was for getting off the
drugs that next level was just like why
did you do those drugs why did you act
the way that you did why are you the
person that you are and that's what I
was suppressing for so many
years
but you know it is something that you
have to work on every day I used to look
at my future and think like oh I'll just
die by age 30 you know I'm just going to
be high the rest of my life but now it's
just
like you know you find so much Beauty in
the people around you the fact that I
can be a big sister today to my little
brother and I'm a sister to my older
sister and I can be a daughter I can be
these things today that is the biggest
motivation the things that I've
experienced in sbri are so great and I
just expect them to get
[Music]
better
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