5 Tips For Single Males In The Swinging Lifestyle | Tips All Swinger Bulls Must Know

4OURPLAY by Bella & Jase
13 May 202209:11

Summary

TLDRIn this video, Bella and Jay offer five tips for single males, known as 'bulls,' to succeed in the swinging lifestyle. They emphasize creating a standout dating profile, engaging with groups or couples, being respectful and courteous, avoiding desperation, and being genuine. They also stress the importance of patience and not being taken advantage of, ensuring a positive experience in the community.

Takeaways

  • 😀 Create a standout dating profile by showcasing your interests both in and out of the lifestyle, and use current, well-groomed photos.
  • 🔎 Only message couples who are open to meeting single males (bulls) to increase your chances of success.
  • 👥 Get involved with a group or couple to feel more comfortable and safe, and to expand your social circle within the lifestyle.
  • 🌟 Be respectful and courteous by addressing couples as a pair and avoiding making anyone feel uncomfortable.
  • 🚫 Avoid coming off as desperate or awkward; engage in real conversations and friendships rather than just observing.
  • 👍 Maintain good grooming and confidence to stand out and feel more at ease in social settings.
  • 💡 Be patient in finding the right couple or group, as it may take time to establish connections.
  • 🧐 Always be yourself and let your personality shine through to attract the right people and experiences.
  • 🚷 Respect the rules of clubs and events, and be courteous by not intruding where you're not supposed to be.
  • 🛡️ Don't settle for being taken advantage of; ensure that couples have good intentions and respect your boundaries.

Q & A

  • What is the first step to be successful as a bull in the lifestyle?

    -The first step is to create a dating profile where you stand out from other bulls by including all your interests and having good, current pictures that show your personality.

  • Why is it important to have a good dating profile as a bull?

    -A good profile helps you stand out, makes a strong first impression, and allows potential partners to connect with you beyond just playwise activities.

  • What is one big piece of advice for messaging on dating profiles in the lifestyle?

    -Only message people who are looking for bulls. It's important not to message couples who have stated they are not interested in bulls as it's unlikely to change their preferences.

  • Why is getting involved with a group or couple beneficial for a bull?

    -Getting involved with a group or couple increases your chances of success by providing a sense of safety and comfort, and it allows you to be invited to more events where you can meet like-minded people.

  • How can a bull ensure they are respectful and courteous in the lifestyle?

    -A bull should always approach couples together, talk to both partners, and avoid making anyone feel uncomfortable or bombarded.

  • What is the importance of not coming off as desperate or awkward at lifestyle events?

    -Appearing desperate or awkward can be off-putting to others. It's better to engage in conversations, make friends, and project confidence.

  • What should a bull do to avoid seeming creepy at lifestyle events?

    -A bull should avoid behaviors like watching people from a distance or opening closed curtains. Instead, they should engage in social interactions and respect the rules of the venue.

  • Why is it crucial for a bull to be patient in the lifestyle?

    -Finding the right couple or group takes time. Being patient allows a bull to build genuine connections and avoid settling for less than ideal situations.

  • How can a bull ensure they are not being taken advantage of in the lifestyle?

    -A bull should set boundaries, be aware of red flags, and ensure that all parties involved are on the same page and have good intentions.

  • What is the final piece of advice for bulls who are new to the lifestyle or not having much luck?

    -The final advice is to be yourself, show your personality, and be confident. Also, ensure that you are not being taken advantage of and that you are respecting others as well as yourself.

  • What is the significance of having a well-groomed appearance for a bull in the lifestyle?

    -A well-groomed appearance helps a bull stand out and make a positive impression, which can lead to more successful interactions and connections.

Outlines

00:00

🐃 Becoming a Successful Bull in the Lifestyle

The video offers five tips for single males, known as 'bulls,' to succeed in the lifestyle community. The first step is to create a compelling dating profile that showcases personal interests beyond the lifestyle. It's crucial to have high-quality, current photos that represent one's best self without filters. Avoid messaging couples who explicitly state they are not looking for bulls. Instead, focus on those who are open to such connections. The video emphasizes the importance of having a strong profile to stand out among other bulls and increase the chances of being sought after.

05:01

🤝 Getting Involved in the Community

The second tip is to get involved with a group or couple within the lifestyle community. This involvement can lead to a sense of comfort and safety, as well as invitations to events that welcome single males. Making friends within the community can lead to more opportunities and experiences. The video suggests that being respectful and courteous is essential to avoid giving the wrong impression, especially when approaching couples. It's advised to engage in genuine conversations and form real friendships, as the lifestyle is not just about sexual encounters but also about building connections.

🚫 Avoiding Desperation and Awkwardness

The third tip addresses the potential pitfalls of appearing desperate or awkward. It's advised that single males should actively engage with others, rather than observing from the sidelines, which can come across as creepy. The video suggests dressing well and being confident to stand out and feel more at ease. It also touches on the importance of respecting the rules of clubs and events, such as not opening closed curtains or entering unauthorized areas. The message is to be genuine, confident, and respectful to enhance one's experience and the comfort of others.

🧍‍♂️ Being Yourself and Patience

The fourth tip encourages bulls to be themselves and to display their personality and confidence. It advises patience in finding the right couple or group to connect with, as it may take time. The video reassures viewers that with patience and the right approach, success in the lifestyle is achievable. It also warns against being taken advantage of, emphasizing the importance of setting personal boundaries and being aware of potential 'bull hunters' who might not have genuine intentions.

👋 Conclusion and Call to Action

The video concludes with a reminder to not settle for less than respectful and genuine connections. It advises bulls to trust their instincts and ensure that any potential partners are on the same page before proceeding. The hosts encourage viewers to like, comment, and subscribe for more content, and to leave suggestions for future videos. They express gratitude for the viewers' engagement and look forward to connecting in future videos.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Bull

In the context of the video, 'Bull' refers to a single male who is part of the swinging lifestyle. This term is central to the video's theme as it focuses on providing advice for individuals in this role on how to be successful within the community. The script mentions that Bulls need to create a compelling dating profile to stand out and find connections, emphasizing the importance of this role in the swinging lifestyle.

💡Dating Profile

A 'Dating Profile' is an online representation of oneself used to attract potential partners. In the video, creating a dating profile is highlighted as the first step for Bulls to succeed. It's advised that Bulls should include a variety of interests beyond just their swinging desires to connect on a more personal level, which is crucial for standing out and making genuine connections.

💡Interests

'Interests' in the video refers to hobbies or activities that a person enjoys outside of their swinging lifestyle. It's suggested that Bulls should list their interests on their dating profiles to showcase their personality and facilitate deeper connections. This is important as it helps to humanize Bulls and allows potential partners to see them as more than just their role in the swinging community.

💡Groomed

Being 'Groomed' in the context of the video means presenting oneself in a well-kept and attractive manner. It's mentioned that Bulls should be well-groomed and have good pictures on their dating profiles to make a positive first impression. This is significant as physical appearance plays a role in initial attraction and can influence the success of finding partners within the lifestyle.

💡Couples

The term 'Couples' in the video refers to partnered individuals or couples who are also part of the swinging lifestyle. The script advises Bulls not to message couples who have specified they are not looking for Bulls, as it's unlikely to change their preferences. This advice is crucial for Bulls to focus their efforts on those who are open to their involvement.

💡Group Involvement

'Group Involvement' refers to the act of participating in a community or group setting. The video suggests that Bulls should get involved with a group or couple to increase their chances of success. It's highlighted that being part of a group can lead to more invitations to events and the formation of friendships, which are key to building trust and respect within the community.

💡Respectful

Being 'Respectful' in the video means treating others with consideration and politeness. It's emphasized that Bulls should approach couples as a unit and not single out one partner, which can make the other feel uncomfortable. Respect is a cornerstone of the swinging lifestyle, and the video stresses the importance of maintaining respectful interactions to avoid negative experiences.

💡Desperation

'Desperation' in the video is used to describe a sense of urgency or neediness that can be off-putting. The script advises Bulls not to appear desperate, as it can lead to being perceived as creepy or uncomfortable. Instead, Bulls are encouraged to engage in genuine conversations and build friendships, which are more likely to result in positive experiences within the lifestyle.

💡Confidence

'Confidence' in the video refers to a self-assured and comfortable demeanor. It's suggested that Bulls should project confidence to enhance their experience and make others feel more at ease. Confidence is portrayed as a key attribute that can help Bulls overcome the initial challenges of being a single male in the swinging community and attract potential partners.

💡Patience

'Patience' in the video is mentioned as the virtue of waiting calmly for something to happen. The script advises Bulls to be patient in finding the right couple or group, as it may take time. Patience is crucial in the swinging lifestyle, as it allows Bulls to avoid settling for unsuitable situations and to find more fulfilling connections.

💡Boundaries

'Boundaries' in the video refers to the limits or rules that an individual sets for themselves in relationships. The script encourages Bulls to establish and maintain their boundaries to avoid being taken advantage of. This is important as it ensures that Bulls protect their own interests and maintain a healthy and respectful dynamic within the swinging community.

Highlights

Make a dating profile to stand out as a single male in the lifestyle.

Include all interests, not just playwise, to connect with others on a personal level.

Ensure you have good, current pictures without filters to show your true personality.

Respect couples' preferences by not messaging those not looking for a bull.

Get involved with a group or couple to increase your success in the lifestyle.

Being part of a group can lead to invitations to events and more connections.

Be respectful and courteous to avoid the negative stereotype associated with single men in the lifestyle.

Approach couples together or talk to the male first to show respect.

Avoid coming off as desperate or awkward by making friends and engaging in real conversations.

Dress well and be confident to stand out and feel more at ease.

Be patient in finding the right couple or group as it may take time.

Show your personality and be confident to enhance your experience.

Ensure you are not being taken advantage of and maintain your boundaries.

Trust your gut and watch out for red flags when interacting with couples.

Make sure couples are on the same page before engaging to avoid misunderstandings.

Leave a like and comment if you have recommendations or want to see more videos on the topic.

Subscribe to the channel for notifications on new videos.

Transcripts

play00:00

hey everyone welcome back to the forplay

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channel I'm Bella I'm

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[Music]

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Jay so today's video is going to be five

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tips about how to be successful in

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lifestyle as a bull so what a Bull is

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for anyone who doesn't know that is a

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single male in the lifestyle so this

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what you need to know first step is

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going to be make a dating profile and

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this is where you have a chance to stand

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out from other Bulls one thing want to

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definitely do is you want to put all of

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your interest so not just what you want

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to do playwise like yes do put all of

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that but put some your interest outside

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the lifestyle if you like sports or you

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like whatever it is write that in there

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so people can make connections to you

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more than just about what you want to do

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playwise make sure you have really good

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pictures you want to be very well

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groomed you want to be the best dressed

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you want to really stand out so you

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don't want just and make sure you're not

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using filters make sure you're not using

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a picture from 10 5 10 years ago make

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sure it's a current picture and make

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sure they're not just all like wee we

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PS you want to show yourself your

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personality and I'm telling you you will

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stand out if you have a good profile one

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big piece of advice is a lot of couples

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will have no profile that they are

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looking for couples they're looking for

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single females and they'll say not

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looking for bulls do not message people

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that do not want a bull I I promise

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you're not going to be the one person

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that like convinces them that they need

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a bull so just message the people that

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are looking for bulls and then that way

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you're going to actually have success

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the number of messages we have got from

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Bulls when our profile says we're not

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looking for

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Bulls doesn't work so keep that in mind

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okay message people that are really

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looking for that and that's where you

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really are going to find the connections

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and looking for the people that really

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do want to meet because there's a ton of

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people out there that are looking for

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Bulls but you need to find the right

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people there are a lot of single males

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in the lifestyle a lot of single guys

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who want to be in the lifestyle and

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there's not as much demand for them so

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that's why it's so so so important to

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have an amazing profile make sure your

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pictures are good and show the best

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version of yourself so you can have the

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best experience in the lifestyle and so

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you are actually sought after out of all

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of the other Bulls tip number two now

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this is a huge one it is to get involved

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with a group or with a couple and you

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are going to have so much more success

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this way we have seen so many bulls able

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to get really involved in a group and

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you feel very comfortable and safe

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because you have friends you're going to

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be able to find events that do allow for

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single males a lot of clubs on Fridays

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or weekdays will allow single males

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those nights are going to people are

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going to be more looking for males so

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you're going to want to go in there and

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really try to make friends because if

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you can get involved in a group that's

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when you're going to start getting

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invited to other events and people are

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going to say Hey you know he's a really

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safe guy we've had great experiences

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with him and I promise you that is going

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to be the biggest key to you having

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successful lifestyle is really making

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friends and getting involved because

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then that way people know that you're

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trustworthy and I think at the end of

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the day that's really what people are

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looking for in Bulls and those couples

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can introduce you to maybe they have a

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unicorn friend maybe they have a single

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friend that's a woman and then maybe you

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guys can get together and then you can

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have this like swinging Love Story We we

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actually know a lot of people who have

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had that like they were they were a

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unicorn and a bowl in the lifestyle came

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together and now they're a couple in the

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lifestyle so that's always something

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that's possible tip number three is be

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respectful and courteous this goes for

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everyone in the lifestyle obviously the

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reason why single men in the lifestyle

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or both seem to have a bad rap is

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because of this it's because a lot of

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couples have had bad experiences with

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bulls and so make sure you're respectful

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and courteous and how you can do that is

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make sure you are going up to a couple

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and talking to them together as a couple

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or talk to the guy first there's been so

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many times where a single guy has waited

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for my husband to go to the restroom and

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then would come up to me and talk to me

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and like I would feel very bombarded

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sometimes there'll be like a couple of

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them coming up to me and it's like why

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couldn't you just come up to both of us

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it feels very very strange when the men

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wait for the other like wait for your

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other half to go away like just go up

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together yes and we've had those people

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that when I came back to talk with her

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just walk off and just in the

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conversation wherever it was it's really

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weird and that is just not how you want

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to do it you want to talk to both people

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or talk to at least the male first and

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maybe they uce you to your their wife

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but you just want to be able to talk to

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the couple because that's where you're

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going to find success you don't want to

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make the woman feel uncomfortable you

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don't want to make anybody feel

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uncomfortable but like whenever a

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woman's like by herself it's like

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whenever she's the most vulnerable like

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don't do that whenever you do go up and

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meet new people make sure you're making

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like actual conversation real

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conversation and making real friendships

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cuz this isn't just about spicy stuff

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like the lifestyle isn't just about sex

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like it's about friendship too and so

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you want to make sure that you are going

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in showing that you're not there just to

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sleep with people all right that brings

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us into tip number four it is don't come

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off as desperate or awkward now we are

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not saying that most Bulls are desperate

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awkward but sometimes that is the way it

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comes off if you are just walking around

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kind of sitting in the corner and at

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watching people if you're a single male

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it can come off kind of creepy maybe

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that is not how you're intending to be

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but it can come off that way so we

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strongly advise going up talking to

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people making friends and not just

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sitting there watching because that can

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come off the wrong way and even if

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you're not intending it to it still

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might send the wrong signal and that's

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definitely not what you want to do we

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touched on this when we were talking

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about the profiles but you want to be

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the best addressed at the club too and

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you're going to have the best experience

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that way this is going to make you stand

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out and it's going to make you feel more

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confident and so that's going to help

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with the desperation awkwardness where

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like you don't come off that way when

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you come off confident and you come off

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in this way that like you're well put

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together you're respectful you're going

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to have a better experience and people

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are going to feel more comfortable

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around you from experience we have seen

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bulls that will go up and actually talk

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to people and make friends and we've

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been like a cruise before and by the end

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you see that these single men have so

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many friends they're so involved in

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groups and you see the people that

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didn't do that that only stuck to the

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other single guys and they're still just

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sitting there watching so it may be a

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little bit nerve-wracking to go up and

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talk to people together or try to get

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involved but we promise once you do

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you'll be able to and you really will

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have so much more fun that way another

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little tip is we've seen this before and

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not saying it's everybody but we have

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had single men like if you're on a

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Friday night or something where they'll

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open a curtain in a room that's supposed

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to be closed and just be respectful be

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courteous don't be weird and rude that

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is such a rude thing to do and if you're

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not supposed to be somewhere respect

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that rule just stay in the areas you're

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supposed to be at that time so that's

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just another piece of advice that

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probably shouldn't have to be said but

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just make sure that you're following all

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the rules and really really respecting

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everybody in the club tip number five is

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to just be yourself it's kind of a

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combination of all of the tips but make

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sure you're showing your personality

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make sure you're confident make sure

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that you are really standing out as you

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and not you know again being awkward or

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or being or seeming desperate or seeming

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creepy that confidence is really going

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to show through and make your experience

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so much better we also highly advise

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being patient you're not just going to

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find the right couple really really

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quickly I mean maybe you do but it might

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take a while to find the right couple or

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to get involved in the group so just be

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patient and I promise with time you're

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going to have a lot of luck but it is

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that waiting game of trying to find the

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right people it's all going to be worth

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it because the lifesty is a really

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really cool space there is so much room

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for single males there but you're just

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going to have a little bit harder time

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at the beginning because of the stigma

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that's associated with it but hopefully

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not you watch this videos you know some

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things to avoid you know things that you

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can do to have your chances be the best

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of finding friendship in the lifestyle

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and one more thing do not get taken

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advantage of so yes as a single guy in

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the lifestyle there's a lot of single

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men and the demand isn't there but that

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doesn't mean that you need to settle for

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anything right like you want to make

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sure that the couple has good intentions

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and that they're not treating you like

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an object to fulfill their fantasy you

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don't hear the word bull hunter as often

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but it's definitely a thing and so you

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want to make sure that you have your own

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rules your own boundaries for yourself

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you want to make sure that you're

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watching out for the red flags for

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couples if there's a couple that's not

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on the same page if trust your gut if

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you have a weird feeling about a couple

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don't continue to go on with it and make

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sure if a woman says she wants to play

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with you you know make sure you've

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talked to her husband make sure that

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they're on the same page so that you're

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never stepping on any toes so I said

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like B said make sure that you're not

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getting taken advantage of cuz it's not

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talked about as much but it definitely

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definitely happens so have respect for

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couples but make sure to also have that

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respect for yourself and make sure

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people are respecting you and that

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brings us to the end of this video

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hopefully these tips were able to help

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you especially if you're newer into the

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lifestyle as a single male maybe you've

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been in it for a while and you don't

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know why you're not having the best of

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luck hopefully these tips were able to

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help you and make sure you guys leave a

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like and a comment if you have any

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recommendations or any videos that you

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want to see leave them in the comments

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below and make sure to subscribe it

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really really helps the channel out and

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it's free for you and you'll get

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notified every time that we have a new

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video thank you guys so much for

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watching and we will see you in the next

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one bye

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Lifestyle TipsSingle MalesCommunity AdviceDating ProfileSocial EngagementRespectful BehaviorConfidence BuildingAvoid DesperationSwinging EtiquetteLifestyle Success
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