10 Simple Ways To Improve Your Networking Skills - How To Network With People Even If You're Shy!

Summary

In this informative video, Stephan Erdman shares 11-12 effective strategies for mastering the art of networking. He addresses common networking challenges such as shyness and awkwardness and offers practical tips like setting goals, initiating contact, avoiding negativity, and focusing on mutual benefits. Erdman also emphasizes the importance of balance in conversations and the power of connecting people with each other. His advice aims to transform networking from a daunting task into an enjoyable and fruitful experience.

Takeaways

• 🎯 Set a clear goal for each networking event to guide your interactions and make you proactive.
• 🤝 Always take the initiative to start conversations and be the first to greet others.
• 🚫 Avoid negativity and focus on building positive connections with others.
• 🔄 Once a connection is made, gracefully exit the conversation to allow for further networking opportunities.
• 💡 Focus on giving value first and expect reciprocity later to build trust and meaningful relationships.
• 🔗 Be a connector by introducing people to each other, which can earn you goodwill and future favors.
• 🤔 Maintain a curious mindset to explore mutual benefits and how you can collaborate with others.
• 📉 Ensure conversation balance by giving others the opportunity to speak and share their experiences.
• 🚶 Keep moving to maintain momentum and make it easier to initiate new conversations.
• 😄 Find enjoyment in the networking process to make it more engaging for both you and others.
• 📇 Remember to exchange contact information and follow up after the event to solidify new connections.

Q & A

What is the main purpose of the video by Stephan Erdman?

The main purpose of the video is to share strategies for effective networking, helping those who find networking difficult to improve their skills and enjoy the process.

Why does Stephan Erdman emphasize the importance of setting a goal before attending a networking event?

Setting a goal helps attendees to be proactive, focus on meaningful connections, and make the event more enjoyable and productive.

What is the second tip Stephan gives for effective networking?

The second tip is to take the first step and initiate contact, rather than waiting for others to approach you.

Why should one avoid being negative during networking events according to the video?

Being negative can put off potential connections, as it reflects insecurity and can make others feel uncomfortable or 'dirty' after engaging with you.

What does Stephan suggest doing after having a good conversation with someone at a networking event?

Stephan suggests expressing gratitude for the conversation, stating your intention to stay in touch, and then moving on to meet more people.

How can focusing on giving rather than receiving help in networking?

Focusing on giving first shows that you are not solely focused on your own interests, which can build trust and goodwill with new connections.

What is the 'magic move' for networking that Stephan mentions in the video?

The 'magic move' is connecting people with each other, which can earn you brownie points and make you memorable to both parties.

What is the importance of maintaining a balance in conversations during networking events?

Maintaining a conversation balance ensures that neither party feels unheard or bored, and it allows for a more engaging and reciprocal exchange of ideas.

Why should one keep moving during a networking event according to Stephan?

Keeping moving makes it easier to initiate new conversations, maintain momentum, and avoid appearing stagnant or unapproachable.

What is the final tip Stephan gives for making networking enjoyable?

The final tip is to find ways to enjoy the process and make it fun for yourself, which in turn can make the event more enjoyable for others.

What does Stephan suggest as a method to overcome the awkwardness of starting a conversation at a networking event?

Stephan suggests using simple and natural openers like acknowledging someone's presence with a smile and a greeting, and asking if they are there for networking.

Outlines

00:00

🤝 Overcoming Networking Challenges

The video script introduces the topic of networking and the creator, Stephan Erdman, who used to find networking difficult due to being an introvert. He shares his personal experience and transformation from hating networking to enjoying it and being good at it. The script promises to provide 11-12 strategies to improve networking skills, especially for those who find it awkward or feel uncomfortable in social settings. Stephan encourages viewers to subscribe to his YouTube channel for more content.

05:03

🎯 Setting Goals for Networking Success

The second paragraph emphasizes the importance of setting a goal when attending a networking event. Stephan explains his previous approach of attending without a plan and how it led to awkwardness and ineffectiveness. He contrasts this with his new method of setting a specific goal, such as making five meaningful connections, which has significantly improved his networking outcomes. The paragraph also touches on the idea of enjoying the process and making it fun, which is a key to successful networking.

10:03

🚀 Proactive Networking: Taking the First Step

This paragraph focuses on the strategy of taking the initiative in networking. Stephan advises viewers to be proactive by initiating contact rather than waiting for others to approach them. He suggests acknowledging newcomers to the event and starting simple conversations to break the ice. The paragraph also warns against negativity and encourages maintaining a positive attitude throughout networking interactions.

🤝 Moving Beyond Initial Connections

The fourth paragraph discusses the importance of not clinging to the first person you connect with at a networking event. Stephan advises making a point to move on after establishing a good connection, to allow both parties the opportunity to meet more people. He stresses the importance of not being selfish and ensuring that the interaction is mutually beneficial.

💡 Focusing on Giving and Connecting

In this paragraph, Stephan highlights the value of giving before receiving in networking. He suggests offering help or connections to others as a way to build trust and goodwill. The paragraph also introduces the concept of connecting people with each other as a way to earn 'brownie points' and establish oneself as a valuable networker.

🤔 Curiosity and Mutual Benefit in Conversations

The sixth paragraph emphasizes the role of curiosity in networking conversations. Stephan encourages viewers to be interested in what others do and how they can collaborate or benefit mutually. He stresses the importance of focusing on the mutual benefit rather than solely on personal gains to build trust and strong connections.

📉 Avoiding Monopolisation in Conversations

This paragraph warns against dominating conversations and turning into a 'boring person' who only talks about themselves. Stephan advises maintaining a balance in conversations, likening it to a game of tennis where the 'ball' or topic goes back and forth between speakers. He also mentions the importance of not just asking questions but also providing information about oneself.

🚶‍♂️ Staying Mobile to Foster New Connections

The seventh paragraph discusses the strategy of staying mobile during networking events to foster new connections. Stephan shares his experience of getting stuck in one place and how moving around helps initiate new conversations. He suggests that being in motion makes it easier to catch people's attention and start interactions.

🎉 Enjoying the Networking Process

The final paragraph reiterates the importance of enjoying the networking process. Stephan encourages finding ways to make networking fun for oneself, as this positive attitude can make the experience enjoyable for others as well. He concludes by urging viewers to take action, attend networking events, and apply the strategies discussed in the video.

Keywords

💡Networking

Networking refers to the act of building and maintaining relationships with others, particularly in a professional context. In the video, networking is the central theme, with the creator sharing strategies to improve at it. The script mentions overcoming the common challenges people face when networking, such as feeling awkward or not knowing how to start conversations.

💡Strategies

Strategies in this context are methods or plans used to achieve a specific goal. The video outlines 11 to 12 strategies for effective networking. These strategies are aimed at helping individuals who find networking difficult and want to improve their skills in this area.

💡Collaboration

Collaboration is the process of working together with others to achieve a common goal. In the script, the creator sets a goal to make meaningful connections with people he could potentially collaborate with, emphasizing the importance of seeking mutual benefit in networking interactions.

💡Goal

A goal is a desired outcome or aim. The video script suggests that attendees of networking events should come with a clear goal in mind, such as making a certain number of connections, which can help guide their actions and improve their networking experience.

💡Initiate

To initiate means to start something or to be the first to act. The script encourages viewers to take the first step in conversations at networking events, which can help overcome shyness and establish connections more effectively.

💡Negative

Being negative refers to having or showing a pessimistic or undesirable view. The video advises against being negative at networking events, as it can be off-putting to others and hinder the formation of positive connections.

💡Positive

Positive denotes an optimistic or favorable outlook. The script stresses the importance of maintaining a positive attitude during networking, as it can attract others and facilitate the building of strong relationships.

💡Reciprocity

Reciprocity is the practice of exchanging things with others for mutual benefit. The video mentions that focusing on mutual benefit and reciprocity in networking can help build trust and stronger connections with others.

💡Connection

A connection in networking refers to a relationship or link established with another person, often with the potential for future collaboration or support. The script discusses the importance of making meaningful connections and how to maintain them after a networking event.

💡Enjoyment

Enjoyment is the state or process of taking pleasure in something. The video encourages viewers to find ways to enjoy the process of networking, suggesting that if it's fun for the individual, it's more likely to be enjoyable for others as well.

💡Momentum

Momentum in this context refers to the impetus or force of movement. The script mentions that maintaining momentum by continuously moving and engaging with new people at networking events can make it easier to start conversations and build connections.

💡Curiosity

Curiosity is the desire to learn or know more about something or someone. The video script highlights the importance of being curious at networking events, as it can lead to discovering mutual interests and potential collaboration opportunities.

💡Balance

Balance in the context of conversation refers to the equal exchange of dialogue between participants. The video advises maintaining conversation balance to ensure that neither party dominates the discussion, which can help prevent boredom and foster more engaging interactions.

Highlights

Networking can be made enjoyable and effective with the right strategies.

Having a goal for networking events can significantly improve one's experience and outcomes.

Initiating contact is crucial; waiting for others to approach can lead to missed opportunities.

Avoid negativity when networking; focus on positive interactions to build meaningful connections.

After establishing a connection, it's important to move on and allow others to network as well.

Focus on giving first and receiving later to show genuine interest in the other person's needs.

Introducing people to one another can earn goodwill and strengthen your networking presence.

Being curious about mutual benefits and how to collaborate is key to successful networking.

Maintaining conversation balance ensures that networking interactions remain engaging and reciprocal.

Physically moving during networking events can help initiate new conversations and maintain momentum.

Finding enjoyment in the networking process can transform it from a chore to a rewarding experience.

Networking events provide opportunities to connect with like-minded individuals and grow professionally.

Making the first move and enjoying networking events can lead to more connections and success.

The video offers 11-12 key tips to improve networking skills and make the process more enjoyable.

Personal experience shared by the creator emphasizes the transformation from disliking to loving networking events.

The importance of setting a goal for networking events is highlighted as a game-changer for effectiveness.

Taking the initiative to start conversations is presented as a fundamental networking skill.

Transcripts

how to get great at networking in this

video I'm going to be sharing with you

11 or even 12 strategies that anybody

can implement to get great at networking

and if you're somebody that finds

networking difficult if you find that

you know any crowd above two people

freaks you out or you just find it if

it's fake and you don't know how to go

about starting a conversation with a

complete stranger at a networking event

and then also extract yourself out of

that conversation where the time comes

and leave with a card then this video is

for you and if you don't know me yet my

name is Stephan Erdman I'm the creator

of this youtube channel but it's just

starting to throw a little bit right now

so if you want to help me grow and if

you want to get all the new videos that

I'm going to keep coming that you must

subscribe here right now

below are not button somewhere here

under the video on to networking why is

networking such a challenge for so many

people and why are people so

irrationally against it I mean ask any

person how they feel about networking

and they inevitably say awkward I don't

know I find it really weird it never

worked I never meet the right people I

get shy I get quiet I don't know I just

get drunk I end up drinking a lot and

then I don't end up with any cards or I

have 20 cards but none of them are feel

any affinity to and/or maybe I'm in the

wrong advanced it just seems hard work

and I get very uncomfortable that's what

you usually hear right I used to be one

of those people that hated networking

and basically avoided any opportunity to

do it and that's why I work very much in

a silo as a rating introverts myself to

be honest any crowd larger than one

other person used to freak me out so let

me just say to you from my own personal

experience it is possible to grow to

love events where there was 30 40 50

people and that are there to network

with you it is fun actually when you

know what you're doing so in this video

I want to give you my 11 or 12

potentially

maybe eleven key tips to basically get

great at networking and and become great

networking also not just for the benefit

of getting connections with meaningful

people but also to enjoy it okay now the

first tip I want to give you is the

following and it has changed my ability

to network effectively over the last few

years massively and it is this come with

a goal what I used to do is I used to go

to a networking and then basically going

oh I hate these things

I'm just going to turn up see what

happens and then what I used to do was I

used to end up at the bar getting a

drink or something then stand around

waiting for people to do something to

get to know me and then when they didn't

I used to just get shy and quiet and I

didn't know what to do anymore and then

I just used to get awkward and then

sometimes I just use disappear now now I

come to the goal and what is that goal

let's say if I go like a few days ago I

went to a YouTube networking event for

YouTube creative and I think that's why

I'm shooting this video because it just

reminded me of many things that I'm just

doing subconsciously now that I didn't

use to do and I decided that if I go to

this event I will try to make five

meaningful connections with people that

I couldn't collaborate with on something

okay

that was my goal I set myself five

meaningful connections with people that

I can collaborate on something and the

other goal I had was I will enjoy this I

will find ways of making this fun for

myself okay so coming with that attitude

changed everything for me okay I had a

great time and even though I probably

overshot my mark and met more than five

people having the goal there was

actually great to make me proactive

letting us on through step number two

take the first step always it always

helps to take the first step to have the

ability to initiate

first contact and the key thing is those

wait for the people to take the first

step with you but take the third step

with them so as an example when somebody

gets into your radius which I would

maybe say is two meters around you yeah

if you see somebody enter into your

space more or less it feels natural

actually to acknowledge them and to

smile at them and to say hi yeah and the

easiest thing you can say at a

networking event is hi are you here for

networking yeah I mean it can't be any

simpler than that sir tip don't be

negative now what I used to try to do a

lot of the old days because I was quite

a miserable guy and quite insecure

because to be honest negativity is

nothing but insecurity disguised I used

to basically try to bond with people

over bad things like oh this event

really sucks doesn't it oh god this wine

is bad you know I used to do that kind

of thing it's terrible you basically put

off everybody because you're becoming

that insecure person that nobody wants

to hang out with even if you meet

another person that is insecure or that

wants to be negative deep inside they

are still look down on you because they

probably think you started it and then

afterwards they feel kind of dirty so

never be negative always be positive

okay focus on the positive aspects of

what you experience okay you bond over

positive don't bond over negative just

don't do it forget about it

fourth tip what happens when you

actually get into a conversation and

you're having a little conversation and

it feels good and you're having a real

bond with them what happens you want to

stay with them don't you for the whole

evening because how finally somebody's

talking to me as you're good with them

we have already exchanged numbers and I

just feel good with them and they feel

good with me maybe we should just stay

together the whole evening and feel good

together

no it's networking okay so once you've

connected and everything is good and you

know how to get in touch with each other

make a point of saying thank you it's

been great meeting you I'm

going to get in touch with you at this

in this time and I'm going to meet a few

more people now so who knows maybe I'll

see you later but have a good time okay

and then you move on you're also

stopping them from connecting with other

people so don't be selfish don't focus

just on how good you they make you feel

let them go okay they'll come back to

you later

tip number five focus on giving first

receiving later okay if you meet

something new you want to focus on

giving something to them so offer to

connect them with somebody that they

want to talk to you offer to help them

with some way because when you do you

show them you prove to them that you

don't just have your own interest at

heart yeah nobody wants to network with

people or meet people again that just

seem to be focused on their own needs

it's okay to be open about your own

needs of course but don't do it at the

expense of the other person tip number

six is something that is a bit of a

master move for networkers okay this is

how you can really earn brownie points

with people and you can also make

yourself feel like you're part of the

setup almost you can feel great about

yourself doing this and that is to

connect people with each other it's by

the way it's also a great way to leave

somebody is actually to say to them you

know I met something that I think you

should connect with earlier and they're

a great person for you to talk to

because you sort of in the same area and

maybe you have a lot in common

let me introduce you to them and then

you take them to the other person and

you introduce them to each other now

they're both going to thank you they're

both going to remember you and they're

both going to be grateful what you've

done for them so that will set you up

nicely maybe in the future to ask them a

favor when you reconnect with them again

you understand what I'm saying so this

is a bit of a magic move for networking

okay

so use this one it's a great move as

well for if you have found somebody that

you don't connect with so much all that

there is no benefit to you to connect

with them again or network or work with

them in some

we will collaborate then you can

literally pass them on to somebody else

that you feel could have a great

connection with them so it's a bit of a

magic move for networking so remember

it's seven always the curious as to the

mutual benefit of what you could do

together okay

mutual benefit and curiosity curiosity

is your friend okay at the networking

event curiosity is great if you are in a

curious mindset you want to find out

about what people do and how what you do

could fit in with that how you could

collaborate is how you could connect

what is the mutual benefit that is the

key question that everybody is there for

so be sure that you focus on the mutual

benefit and not just on your own benefit

okay because that's how you will build

trust with somebody that is there also

of course for their benefit and if you

basically bring out a benefit for them

yourself and you mentioned that up front

with them it builds trust in a builder

connection and it builds a sense of

reciprocity with them tip number eight

conversation balance now nobody wants to

be in a situation where they have to

listen to somebody for three minutes

talking and talking and talking about

their business and never get a chance to

speak themselves so the one thing that

you don't have become is the boring

person that turns on and on and on and

on about themselves at a networking

event okay so always focus on

conversation balance think of tennis the

conversation is the ball or the topic is

the ball sometimes it's in their court

sometimes it's in your court and it goes

back and forth the more you can switch

it back and forth the less likely you

are to bore somebody to tears and also

it gives people a chance to let you know

that maybe you're not going to connect

okay and that's fine too yeah so

conversation balance don't drone on and

on about it and also don't just ask

question of the question of the question

as inflow tip number nine is keep moving

now what I used to do physically is I

used to kind of get stuck I speak to one

person and then they leave and then I

just thought oh ah just

stay here and wait no that's not going

to work you don't have any momentum it's

much easier to get into a new

conversation when you are moving okay

when you move you will notice someone's

eye if you have a bit of eye contact

with somebody just turn to them and go

hey are you here for the networking as I

said earlier right but that's easier

when you're moving when you're standing

like this and you're just waiting for

somebody to talk to you then you know

people are not going to be as likely to

do that for you so much better if you

are moving once you have finished the

conversation with somebody move in a

direction or just see what happens and

you will notice some people's eyes will

meet yours and that's when you turn to

them and start the conversation almost

the last tip is the following that I

already mentioned earlier find a way of

enjoying the process focusing on this

idea of how can I enjoy this process how

can I make this fun for myself is one of

my favorite ways of thinking about this

and trust me when you focus on this it

really focuses your mind

on this aspect of this has to turn into

a fun event for me and if it's not fun

to me it's unlikely to be fun for other

people now you've got the ten or eleven

or twelve basic tips to get great as

networking so now it's up to you to

remake that move and start doing it okay

there are meetup groups there are

networking events that drinks after work

there are entrepreneurs events there are

so many events where you can connect

with like-minded people so go for it

always make the first move enjoy it and

have a lot of fun of these events and

you will notice that actually once you

get into it

it's a lot easier than it seems please

subscribe let me know what you think of

this and let me know your questions

[Music]

[Applause]