The walk from "no" to "yes" | William Ury

Summary

The speaker shares a parable of three brothers and 17 camels to illustrate the complexity of negotiation and the power of creative solutions. Drawing from his experiences in global conflicts, he emphasizes the role of the 'third side' in resolving disputes. Inspired by the story of Abraham, he introduces the 'Abraham Path,' a journey that fosters unity and hospitality, offering a transformative approach to peace and understanding in conflict-ridden regions.

Takeaways

• 🐫 The story of the 17 camels illustrates the importance of creative problem-solving in negotiations, where the introduction of an '18th camel' helps resolve a seemingly intractable issue.
• 👵 The wise old woman represents the role of a third party in conflicts, who can offer a fresh perspective and facilitate resolution.
• 🌐 The speaker's life passion is to find the '18th camel' in global conflicts, emphasizing the need for innovative approaches to peacemaking.
• 👨‍👧‍👦 The concept of humanity as one family, all connected through communication, is highlighted as a basis for understanding and resolving conflicts.
• 🔍 The speaker's experiences in various conflict zones underscore the complexity of peacemaking and the search for underlying causes of disputes.
• 🤝 The 'third side' in conflicts is the surrounding community, including friends, allies, and neighbors, who can play a constructive role in resolution.
• 🗣️ The third side's fundamental role is to remind parties of the bigger picture and the importance of dialogue over conflict.
• 🌍 The Abraham Path Initiative is introduced as a practical example of the third side in action, promoting peace through walking in the footsteps of Abraham.
• 👣 Walking is presented as a powerful, unifying act that can foster understanding and reconciliation, as exemplified by the Abraham Path.
• 💡 The potential economic benefits of the Abraham Path are highlighted, showing how peace initiatives can also improve local livelihoods.
• 🌳 The acorn metaphor is used to envision the growth of the Abraham Path from a small beginning to a transformative force for peace and unity in the Middle East.

Q & A

What is the central theme of the story involving the three sons and the 17 camels?

The central theme is the resolution of a difficult negotiation by creatively finding an '18th camel', which symbolizes stepping back and looking at the situation with fresh eyes to find a solution that benefits all parties involved.

How does the wise old woman's offer of her camel resolve the conflict among the three sons?

The wise old woman's offer of her camel increases the total number of camels to 18, allowing each son to receive their respective shares (9, 6, and 2 camels) according to the will, and leaving one camel left over which they return to her, thus resolving the conflict.

What is the 'third side' in the context of conflict resolution mentioned in the script?

The 'third side' refers to the surrounding community, including friends, allies, family members, and neighbors, who can play a constructive role in resolving conflicts by reminding the parties of the bigger picture and the importance of reconciliation.

What is the significance of the story about the San Bushmen in South Africa?

The story of the San Bushmen illustrates a traditional method of conflict resolution where community members engage in open dialogue until a resolution or reconciliation is reached, emphasizing the importance of communication and patience in resolving disputes.

How does the concept of 'going to the balcony' help in negotiations?

'Going to the balcony' is a metaphor for taking a step back and gaining perspective in a negotiation, allowing individuals to respond calmly and constructively rather than reacting impulsively to provocations.

What is the 'Abraham Path' and how does it relate to conflict resolution?

The 'Abraham Path' is a symbolic route that retraces the footsteps of Abraham across the Middle East, promoting the values of unity, respect, and hospitality. It serves as a tool for fostering understanding and connection among diverse communities and countering religious intolerance.

How does the speaker suggest that the story of Abraham could be an antidote to terrorism?

The speaker suggests that the story of Abraham, which embodies hospitality and respect for strangers, can serve as an antidote to terrorism by promoting the opposite values: treating strangers as friends and fostering understanding and respect rather than fear and violence.

What is the economic potential of the 'Abraham Path' as mentioned in the script?

The economic potential of the 'Abraham Path' lies in its ability to stimulate local economies along the route through tourism. As people walk the path, they spend money on local goods and services, providing income and opportunities for communities that may be struggling.

How does the speaker describe the transformative power of the 'third side' in conflicts?

The speaker describes the 'third side' as a force that can change the narrative from hostility to hospitality and from conflict to cooperation. By engaging in acts of kindness and understanding, individuals can contribute to a more peaceful and unified world.

What is the speaker's final call to action for the audience?

The speaker's final call to action is to encourage the audience to take the 'third side' by engaging in conversations with people from different cultures, countries, or ethnicities, embodying the principles of the 'Abraham Path' and promoting peace and understanding.

What role does the story of Abraham play in the speaker's vision for peace in the Middle East?

The story of Abraham plays a central role in the speaker's vision for peace as it represents a shared heritage and values of unity and respect among the diverse groups in the Middle East. By reviving and living out the story, the speaker believes it can serve as a foundation for reconciliation and cooperation.