Is It Okay to Masturbate Without Porn? | (Explained by a Sex Addiction Specialist)

Summary

Benji from the NoFap movement discusses the impact of masturbation without pornography and its potential effects on personal growth and relationships. He poses critical questions about post-masturbation feelings and the desire to maintain the habit in the future. Benji emphasizes the addictive nature of masturbation and its potential to desensitize individuals from real-life sexual intimacy. He advocates for a selfless approach to sexuality, suggesting that focusing on a genuine relationship is more fulfilling. He offers a 21-day reboot program for those seeking to quit porn and masturbation, promoting a healthier, more purposeful life.

Takeaways

• 🔞 The speaker discusses the impact of masturbation without pornography, focusing on practical and experiential perspectives.
• 💡 The speaker suggests that after masturbation, feelings of deflation, guilt, or shame are common and indicative of an emotional crutch or addiction.
• ❓ Two key questions are posed to the audience for self-reflection: how they feel after masturbation and whether they wish to continue this behavior into the future.
• 🚫 The speaker argues that masturbation, especially when linked with pornography, can lead to addiction and desensitization, which may negatively affect real-life relationships and sexual experiences.
• 🔗 The speaker emphasizes the importance of disassociating pornography from masturbation to break the cycle of addiction.
• 🧠 Sexual imprinting is highlighted as a significant issue, where individuals can become addicted to specific sexual content or fetishes due to early and repeated exposure.
• 💑 The speaker shares personal advice, advocating for a selfless approach to sexuality within committed relationships, suggesting it leads to more fulfilling experiences.
• 🎁 A 21-day reboot program is offered as a resource for those looking to quit porn and masturbation, with a focus on setting goals beyond these habits.
• 🔗 The speaker invites viewers to access the program for free by visiting a website and using a coupon code, positioning it as a tool for personal growth and healthier living.
• 👍 The speaker encourages viewers to like and subscribe to the channel for more content aimed at helping individuals overcome addictions and improve their lives.

Q & A

What is the main topic of the video script?

The main topic of the video script is the discussion on the effects of masturbation, particularly without the use of pornography, and its impact on one's life, relationships, and overall well-being.

What is the speaker's stance on masturbation without pornography?

The speaker suggests that while it is possible to masturbate without pornography, it's important to consider the emotional impact and whether it's an addictive behavior one wishes to continue into the future.

What are the two important questions the speaker asks viewers to consider about their masturbation habits?

The two questions are: 1) How do you feel after you masturbate? 2) Is masturbating without pornography something you want to bring with you into your future?

Why does the speaker believe that masturbation can lead to a sense of deflation?

The speaker believes that masturbation can lead to a sense of deflation because it often becomes an emotional crutch and an addiction, leading to feelings of guilt and a lack of fulfillment.

What does the speaker suggest as an alternative to masturbation for those seeking to improve their focus and confidence?

The speaker suggests practicing 'no fap' or semen retention as a way to improve focus, confidence, and drive, which can help individuals achieve more in their lives.

What is the '21 Day Reboot Program' mentioned in the script?

The '21 Day Reboot Program' is a challenge designed to help individuals quit pornography and masturbation for 21 days, with the aim of setting their vision on something bigger and healthier.

How can viewers access the '21 Day Reboot Program' for free?

Viewers can access the '21 Day Reboot Program' for free by visiting the website benuyama.com and using the coupon code 'ben'.

What is the speaker's view on the role of sexuality in a healthy relationship?

The speaker believes that the purpose of sexuality is to give, not to receive, and that being selfless with one's sexuality in a relationship is more fulfilling and leads to greater happiness.

Why does the speaker argue that sexual imprinting on pornography is problematic?

The speaker argues that sexual imprinting on pornography is problematic because it can lead to addiction to specific content, desensitization to real relationships, and a preference for fantasy over actual sexual intimacy.

What advice does the speaker give to those who are considering whether to continue masturbating?

The speaker advises individuals to be honest with themselves about whether they want to continue the habit of masturbation and to consider the impact it has on their life, relationships, and personal goals.

Outlines

00:00

🔞 Quitting Porn and Masturbation

The speaker, Benji, discusses the impact of masturbation without pornography and its effects on personal growth. He emphasizes the importance of quitting porn through semen retention to improve focus, confidence, and drive. Benji raises two critical questions: how one feels after masturbation and whether the habit is something one wants to carry into the future. He suggests that masturbation often leads to feelings of guilt and deflation, indicating an addictive behavior. He advises considering whether this habit is beneficial or detrimental to one's future, including relationships and career.

05:01

💪 Overcoming Addiction for a Fulfilling Life

Benji continues by discussing the addictive nature of sexual stimulation and how it can lead to desensitization and a preference for pornography over real-life sexual experiences. He stresses the importance of selflessness in sexuality and how focusing on a genuine relationship can lead to a more intense and fulfilling sexual life. Benji shares his personal experience and offers a 21-day reboot program for those willing to quit porn and masturbation. He encourages viewers to sign up for the program on his website using a coupon code and to like and subscribe for more content aimed at helping them live a thriving life.

Keywords

💡Masturbation

Masturbation is the act of self-stimulation of one's genitals for sexual pleasure. In the context of the video, it is discussed as a behavior that can be practiced without the accompaniment of pornography. The speaker suggests that masturbation, when not associated with porn, can be a topic of personal reflection and potentially a habit to reconsider for one's future, especially in the pursuit of a healthier and more fulfilling life.

💡Pornography

Pornography refers to the depiction of sexual subject matter for the purpose of sexual arousal. The video emphasizes the potential negative impacts of associating masturbation with pornography, leading to addiction and desensitization. It is portrayed as a crutch that can hinder personal growth and genuine relationships.

💡Sexual Imprint

Sexual imprinting is a concept in the video that describes how individuals can become conditioned to specific sexual stimuli, often through repeated exposure and masturbation to certain types of content. This can lead to a preference for fantasy over real-life sexual experiences, which the speaker argues is detrimental to forming genuine connections.

💡Deflation

Deflation, in the video, is used metaphorically to describe the feeling of letdown or emptiness that can follow masturbation. The speaker suggests that this emotional state is common after the act, especially when it is an addictive behavior, and contrasts with the positive feelings of empowerment and motivation that one might seek in their life.

💡Addiction

Addiction, in this context, refers to the compulsive engagement in a behavior despite its negative consequences. The video discusses how masturbation, particularly when linked with pornography, can become an addictive behavior that is hard to break free from and can overshadow other aspects of life.

💡Semen Retention

Semen retention is the practice of abstaining from ejaculation, which is mentioned as a method to increase focus, confidence, and drive. The video suggests that by not masturbating, one can redirect sexual energy towards more productive and fulfilling activities.

💡NoFap

NoFap is a movement and community that encourages individuals to abstain from pornography and masturbation. The video aligns with this philosophy, advocating for a 'porn-free' lifestyle to achieve better focus, confidence, and overall well-being.

💡Selflessness

Selflessness in the video is presented as a positive trait to cultivate in one's sexuality. The speaker argues that focusing on giving rather than receiving in sexual relationships can lead to a more intense and beautiful experience, contrasting with the self-centered nature of masturbation.

💡Relationships

Relationships are discussed in the video as a context where the impact of masturbation and pornography can be particularly significant. The speaker suggests that habits formed through masturbation can affect one's ability to form and maintain healthy, intimate relationships.

💡21 Day Reboot Program

The 21 Day Reboot Program is a challenge mentioned in the video that encourages individuals to abstain from pornography and masturbation for 21 days. It is presented as a tool to help break the cycle of addiction and to refocus one's energy on personal growth and setting bigger life goals.

Highlights

Discussing the practical and experiential aspects of masturbation without porn.

Benji's mission to help people quit porn and achieve more in life.

The common question of whether one can masturbate without associating it with porn.

The emotional aftermath of masturbation and its impact on self-perception.

The addictive nature of masturbation and its desensitizing effects.

Questioning whether masturbation is a habit one wants to carry into the future.

The potential negative effects of masturbation on future relationships and personal growth.

Advice on how to disassociate porn from masturbation to combat addiction.

The strong sexual imprinting caused by associating masturbation with specific content.

The development of unique sexual fetishes and addictions due to early exposure to graphic content.

Benji's personal experience and advice on the role of sexuality in a healthy family and relationship.

The importance of being selfless with one's sexuality for a more fulfilling life.

The benefits of focusing sexual energy on a physical relationship rather than masturbation.

Offering a 21-day reboot program to help quit porn and masturbation.

Instructions on how to access the free 21-day reboot program on Ben's website.

Encouragement to like and subscribe for more content on overcoming porn addiction.

Transcripts

i'm going to talk about this from a

practical and also experiential

perspective on whether or not

masturbating just by itself without

watching any porn but how to masturbate

in a way that actually can be helpful

hey guys benji here helping you quit

porn for good and achieve more in your

life whatever you want you want more

money you want a better body better

health better relationships better sex

you can have that all with the practice

of quitting porn no fap semen retention

so that you can have better focus more

confidence and better drive so this is a

very common question that a lot of

people ask in our groups and also when

i'm working with people one-on-one can i

just masturbate and experience that that

climax and that pleasure without

associating that with pornography to

answer this question let me ask you two

really important questions number one is

how do you feel after you masturbate

what is your feeling

in most cases what men feel and women as

well feel after masturbating is a sense

of deflation literature literally and

emotionally deflation meaning that you

masturbate you're feeling your emotional

state it becomes ah i did it again the

cycle continues especially when you're

early on in your sexual um arousal

journey especially if you remember when

you're a teenager the feeling after

masturbation masturbating is very scared

even disgusted even like like i've done

something terrible i've sinned i've

committed a grave sin or something like

that and usually that feeling of

tremendous guilt kind of weans off and

and dies off over time and that is a

clear indication that the act of

masturbating has become more and more of

a emotional crutch and also an addiction

so that it becomes less you become less

less sensitive to it and more

desensitized so ask yourself how do you

feel after masturbating do you feel i'm

on top of the world i'm ready to work

out and start a business and go on a

date and make a difference in the world

i'm willing to bet no

in most cases it's always a sense of

deflation the second important question

you should ask yourself is does

masturbating even without pornography is

it something that you want to bring with

you into the future all right like i

just mentioned masturbating is an

addictive behavior it is very addictive

because of the stimulation right sexual

sexuality is is addictive it's it's

arousing right and especially as if

you're masturbating to specific

pornographic content or even through

fantasy my question for you is is that

habit and that addiction something that

you want to bring with you into your

future is that something you want to

bring with you into your relationships

into your marriage is this something you

want to bring with you even after you

have children is something you want to

bring with you into your working your

working career something you want to

bring with you into your schoolwork into

your your day-to-day life if the answer

is yeah you want to bring with you then

okay i guess it's okay to masturbate but

at the same time most people no i'm

willing to bet it's not something that

you want to rely on but rather you want

to have control over your your sexuality

as opposed to having it control you so

overall is it okay to masturbate without

porn you can do it it's okay but you can

ask yourself and be honest if it's

something that you want to do and bring

with you and is it something that's

already affecting you in a negative way

and you do you really want to live your

life like that the big caveat here is

that the vast majority of people who are

masturbating are also associating that

with pornography meaning they're

watching pornography they're creating a

very strong sexual imprint of

pornography and the problem with that is

that when you do become have that strong

sexual imprinting when you're

masturbating to a specific kind of

content whether pornographic or

fantasizing then you become addicted to

that content and then you become less

and less attracted to actual sex in

relationship and you become actually

desensitized to a real relationship

because you've relied so heavily on

masturbating to that pornographic

content so if you're in the vast

majority of people who are masturbating

to porn my recommendation for for all of

you is to disassociate porn and

masturbation to completely uh unlink

them and disconnect them in this way you

can actually start to wean off the porn

addiction and just if you're going to

masturbate and you decide to masturbate

just do it for the sake of of

masturbating as an act and try not to

fantasize or associate that with

anything that sexual importing that i'm

talking about is very strong this is

usually why people especially nowadays

develop very interesting and unique

fetishes and addictions is because

typically people are exposed to content

when they're very young or they've

exposed to content that is very graphic

and very extreme and aggressive and they

masturbate to that even very strange

things like like a water bottle or

or anything you can become sexually

imprinted to that because of the act of

having the sexual stimulus of

masturbating to that my personal

experience and advice as a man who is

married for now 11 years and we have

kids children is that masturbation is

not something that is conducive to a

healthy family relationship or life

career etc whatever you want in your

life whatever you want to achieve it's

generally not conducive and i believe

that the purpose of sexuality the

perfect purpose of sex drive is to give

not to receive it's to be selfless with

your sexuality and not selfish and the

more we are selfless and giving to our

your spouse your wife the more that your

sexuality becomes actually more intense

and more beautiful and my personal

experience as well as the guys that i

work with is that focusing that sexual

sexuality on an actual physical sexual

relationship and have that imprinting so

strongly associated with a human being

is infinitely more valuable it's more

precious it's more wholesome it's more

fulfilling and in the end it'll make you

more happy so if you're ready to start

with the process of giving up important

masturbation and actually living a

thriving life and having a relationship

that's genuine i want to gift to you

guys a my 21 day reboot program i'm

going to give it to you guys right here

on youtube for free if you go to my

website benuyama.com

and you use my coupon code it's ben ben

i want to give that to you guys it's a

21 day reboot of actually challenging

you to give up porn masturbation for 21

days on the premise on the foundation of

of having your vision set on something

bigger and i talk about this in the

video that you're going to get when you

sign up for that and it's through that

process that porn masturbation all this

stuff becomes just an afterthought it

becomes an old friend that lives under

your bed or in your closet in your

garage that you just don't need anymore

because it's unhealthy for you right so

go check it out go to benuyama.com put

in the coupon code ben if you want to

get for free

if this video was helpful i would

encourage you to smash the like button

because it does help more people find

the video and also consider subscribing

because i'm putting videos out like just

like this just for you guys and uh

consider checking out other videos right

here on the channel it's good to have

you take care

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