EN COUPLE AVEC UNE JAPONAISE C’EST L’ENFER?!

Le Japon en Noir et Blanc©️

4 Jun 201808:39

Summary

TLDRThe video script discusses the dynamics of being in a relationship with a Japanese woman, dispelling common myths found online. It highlights the importance of sincerity and commitment in Japanese relationships, where expressing feelings openly is crucial. The speaker emphasizes that Japanese women value stability and serious intentions, and they are often decisive in ending relationships that lack future prospects. The script also touches on cultural differences in relationships, such as the significance of marriage proposals and the role of family approval. It concludes by advising foreigners to adapt to these cultural nuances when pursuing relationships in Japan.

Takeaways

🌏 The video discusses the dynamics of being in a relationship with a Japanese partner and challenges some stereotypes found online.
🗣️ The speaker aims to dispel myths about Japanese women being 'perfect' and submissive, highlighting that they are often strong-willed and know what they want.
📱 The speaker mentions the importance of expressing feelings openly in Japanese relationships, as they value direct communication and seriousness.
👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 It is noted that in Japan, it's customary to involve family, especially fathers, in significant decisions like marriage.
💼 Japanese women tend to prefer partners who are stable, responsible, and capable of providing for the family, rather than just being attractive.
🏡 Living together before marriage is generally frowned upon in Japanese culture, which is different from some Western norms.
👶 After the birth of a child, the focus in Japanese families often shifts to the child, sometimes relegating the husband to a secondary role.
🤔 The speaker advises foreigners interested in Japanese partners to be prepared for significant cultural differences and the need to adapt.
👫 The video script suggests that while there are successful mixed-nationality couples, the dynamics can be quite different from what one might expect in their home country.
🌐 The speaker emphasizes that while there are common patterns, individual experiences in relationships can vary widely and should not be generalized.

Q & A

What is the main topic discussed in the video?
-The main topic discussed in the video is the experience of being in a relationship with a Japanese woman and debunking common stereotypes about Japanese women being the 'perfect wife'.
Why did the author feel the need to create this video?
-The author felt the need to create this video to debunk the misconceptions and stereotypes he found online about Japanese women being submissive and the 'perfect wife', which he found to be far from the truth in his own experiences.
What is the author's stance on the idea of Japanese women being perfect?
-The author strongly disagrees with the idea that Japanese women are perfect or submissive. He aims to challenge this stereotype by sharing his personal observations and experiences, which differ significantly from these generalizations.
What does the author suggest about the importance of seriousness in relationships with Japanese women?
-The author suggests that seriousness is highly valued in relationships with Japanese women. They appreciate official and formal approaches, and expressing one's feelings openly is often a prerequisite for dating.
How does the author describe the personality of most Japanese women he has encountered?
-The author describes most Japanese women he has encountered as having strong personalities, knowing what they want, and being decisive in ending relationships if they see no future with their partner.
What is the author's advice for foreigners interested in dating Japanese women?
-The author advises foreigners to be serious, express their feelings openly, and respect the cultural norms and expectations in Japan, such as seeking the father's approval before marriage.
What does the author say about the expectations of Japanese women regarding their partners?
-The author states that Japanese women generally prefer partners who are stable, responsible, and capable of providing for the family, rather than just focusing on appearance or being a 'playboy'.
How does the author view the concept of living together before marriage in Japanese culture?
-The author views living together before marriage as being generally frowned upon in Japanese culture, and it is considered inappropriate unless the couple is married.
What challenges does the author foresee for foreign men married to Japanese women, especially after having children?
-The author foresees challenges for foreign men married to Japanese women, particularly after the birth of the first child, as the focus shifts to the child and the husband may be relegated to a secondary role, which can be a significant cultural adjustment.
What is the author's final message to viewers interested in dating or marrying Japanese women?
-The author's final message is that dating and marrying a Japanese woman will be a very different experience from what one might be used to in their home country, and adaptation to the cultural differences is essential for a successful relationship.

Outlines

00:00

🇯🇵 Cultural Insights on Dating Japanese Women

The speaker, a French blogger residing in Japan, dispels common misconceptions about Japanese women in relationships. He emphasizes that contrary to stereotypes, Japanese women are not inherently submissive or the 'perfect wife.' The video addresses the importance of seriousness in dating, where expressing one's feelings openly is crucial before a relationship can progress. The speaker shares anecdotes about the need for men to declare their intentions and the societal expectation for men to be providers and protectors. He also touches on the strong personalities of Japanese women, who are clear about their desires and will end relationships if they see no future. The video serves as a corrective to the romanticized and often inaccurate portrayals of Japanese women in Western media.

05:00

👪 Dynamics of Japanese Couples and Family Life

This paragraph delves into the dynamics of Japanese couples and the cultural shifts post-marriage and childbirth. The speaker notes that it's frowned upon for unmarried couples to live together, a norm that influences the prevalence of 'love hotels' in Japan. He discusses the expectation for men to prioritize family needs over their own, often leading to a de-emphasis on the couple's relationship. The video also addresses the challenges faced by foreign men married to Japanese women, particularly the change in marital dynamics after the birth of a child, which can be a significant cause of divorce. The speaker concludes by highlighting the necessity for foreigners to adapt to these cultural differences when entering a relationship or marriage with a Japanese partner.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Couple

A couple refers to two people who are romantically involved or married. In the context of the video, the speaker discusses the dynamics of being in a couple with a Japanese partner, highlighting cultural differences in relationship expectations and behaviors.

💡Japanese culture

Japanese culture encompasses the customs, traditions, and social behaviors unique to Japan. The video script touches on how Japanese cultural norms, such as the importance of seriousness and formality in relationships, affect the experience of being in a couple with a Japanese person.

💡Submissiveness

Submissiveness, in this context, refers to the stereotype of Japanese women being obedient and submissive in relationships. The speaker challenges this stereotype by sharing personal experiences and observations that contradict the idea that Japanese women are universally submissive.

💡Seriousness

Seriousness is highlighted as a valued trait in Japanese relationships. The speaker mentions that Japanese women appreciate seriousness and formality, such as the need to explicitly state one's feelings before entering a relationship, which contrasts with more casual dating practices.

💡Personality

Personality, in the video, is discussed in terms of Japanese individuals having strong, decisive personalities. The speaker notes that Japanese women, in particular, know what they want and are not afraid to end relationships if they see no future or potential, demonstrating a clear and assertive approach to dating and marriage.

💡Stability

Stability is emphasized as a crucial aspect of relationships in Japanese culture. The speaker explains that Japanese women often seek partners who can provide financial stability and are serious about their careers and family life, reflecting a societal value on long-term security in relationships.

💡Tradition

Tradition plays a significant role in Japanese relationships, as mentioned in the script. For example, the speaker discusses the tradition of seeking the father's approval before marriage, which is a practice rooted in cultural norms of respect for family hierarchy and elders.

💡Marriage

Marriage is a recurring theme in the video, with the speaker discussing the expectations and processes surrounding marriage in Japan. This includes the importance of family approval, the significance of providing for the family, and the cultural shift in priorities post-marriage and after having children.

💡Cohabitation

Cohabitation before marriage is generally frowned upon in Japanese culture, as explained in the video. The speaker notes that it is common for couples to live separately until marriage, reflecting a cultural preference for maintaining certain boundaries and formalities before formalizing a relationship.

💡Gender roles

Gender roles in Japan are highlighted, particularly the expectation that after marriage and especially after the birth of a child, the woman's role becomes centered around the child, often at the expense of the couple's relationship. The speaker contrasts this with European cultures where the husband's role remains more central even after children are born.

💡Cultural adaptation

Cultural adaptation is a key takeaway from the video, as the speaker advises foreigners interested in Japanese relationships to be prepared to adapt to Japanese cultural norms and expectations, which can be quite different from their own.

Highlights

Discussing the stereotype of Japanese women as 'perfect wives' and debunking common misconceptions.

The importance of seriousness in Japanese relationships and the expectation to express feelings openly.

The cultural norm where a man must confess his feelings before dating a Japanese woman.

The expectation of formality and officiality in Japanese dating culture.

The need for a man to meet the father and ask for permission before marriage in Japan.

Japanese women's preference for men with a strong sense of purpose and career stability.

The directness of Japanese women in ending relationships that have no future.

The potential for Japanese women to be very clear and firm in their decisions about relationships.

The advice against persistently pursuing a Japanese woman if she shows disinterest.

The societal view on living together before marriage in Japan and its implications.

The cultural expectation for men to be the primary providers for the family in Japan.

The prevalence of arranged meetings at hotels for unmarried couples in Japan.

The rarity of Japanese women living independently before marriage.

The significant cultural shift in priorities after the birth of a child in a Japanese family.

The challenge for foreigners in Japan to understand the change in family dynamics after having children.

The contrast between Japanese and European perspectives on family life and gender roles.

A reminder that the video's content is not a definitive guide but a general observation of patterns.

Encouragement for viewers to adapt and understand cultural differences when dating in Japan.