Men Are HARDWIRED TO RESPECT Your Worth When They See THESE 5 Things
Summary
TLDRIn this insightful dating advice video, the speaker addresses the dilemma of uncommitted relationships, emphasizing the importance of the 'two to three month rule' as a decisive period for commitment. They advocate for direct communication, confronting mixed signals, and not tolerating hot and cold behavior. The speaker stresses the value of self-esteem, the ability to walk away, and the necessity of respect in relationships, offering strategies to improve dating life and build confidence.
Takeaways
- 😌 The 'two or three month rule' is a guideline for when to decide to leave a relationship that hasn't progressed, suggesting that if there's no commitment after this period, it's unlikely to happen.
- 🚫 Avoiding confrontation can lead to a perception of weakness and may invite disrespect or further testing of boundaries.
- 🤔 The speaker emphasizes the importance of being direct with someone after a few months of dating to clarify intentions and desires for the relationship.
- 💡 Non-verbal cues can communicate a person's willingness to walk away or their desperation, impacting how they are perceived by others.
- 🛡️ Having the willingness to confront and stand up for oneself is a sign of strength that can command respect from others.
- 🔥 The speaker suggests that conflict and confrontation can actually lead to stronger bonds between people, as opposed to avoiding these interactions.
- 👥 The 'hot and cold' behavior of the person being discussed is a sign of uncertainty or a lack of commitment, which should be addressed directly.
- 💭 The speaker mentions that people may test others to gauge their strength or to see if they are truly confident and capable of standing their ground.
- 💔 The fear of losing someone can prevent individuals from being honest and direct, which can create an imbalanced power dynamic in a relationship.
- 🧠 The importance of self-esteem and self-worth is highlighted, noting that people who cannot self-soothe may be taken advantage of or not respected by others.
- 🏫 The speaker promotes their courses as a means to improve dating life and emotional mastery, suggesting that these tools can provide strategies for better relationships.
Q & A
What is the 'three-month rule' mentioned in the script?
-The 'three-month rule' is a guideline suggesting that if a person doesn't want to commit to a relationship within the first two to three months of dating, it's unlikely they will do so later. It's used as a benchmark for when to move on from a non-committal relationship.
What does the script suggest about the 'three or four date rule' for men?
-The 'three or four date rule' for men implies that if a woman doesn't become intimate after three or four dates, it's likely she won't unless there's an exception, such as religious beliefs. It's a perceived indicator of a woman's interest in progressing the relationship.
Why is it important to confront the person you're seeing if they exhibit hot and cold behavior?
-Confronting the person helps to clarify their intentions and feelings, preventing a frustrating limbo. It also shows confidence and a willingness to walk away, which can command respect and potentially lead to a more balanced and honest relationship.
What is the significance of being direct in a relationship?
-Being direct is important because it communicates your needs and expectations clearly. It prevents misunderstandings and shows that you value your own needs and are not afraid to express them, which can lead to a healthier and more respectful dynamic.
How does the willingness to walk away affect non-verbal cues and reactions in a relationship?
-The willingness to walk away can make a person's non-verbal cues more confident and less needy. This can affect how they react to their partner's behavior, potentially making them seem more attractive and less desperate.
What is the impact of not being able to self-soothe on a person's relationships?
-Not being able to self-soothe can lead to an over-reliance on others for emotional support, which can create an imbalance in relationships. It may result in a person being taken advantage of or not receiving the respect they deserve.
Why is it suggested to not accept hot and cold behavior in the script?
-Accepting hot and cold behavior can signal weakness and a lack of boundaries, which may lead to being disrespected or manipulated. Calling out such behavior is a way to assert oneself and maintain a healthy relationship dynamic.
What does the script suggest about the relationship between confrontation and respect?
-The script suggests that confrontation can lead to respect. When a person is willing to confront issues and express their needs, it shows strength and self-assuredness, which can earn them respect from their partner.
What is the 'mindful attraction University' mentioned in the script?
-The 'mindful attraction University' is a collection of courses offered by the speaker, Professor Alex, designed to improve one's dating life and emotional mastery. It includes various modules that can be purchased at a discounted rate.
What is the speaker's stance on refunds for the 'mindful attraction University' courses?
-The speaker states that there are no refunds for purchasing the entire bundle of 'mindful attraction University' courses. However, if a customer purchases one course and likes it, they can upgrade to the bundle by paying the difference.
Why does the speaker emphasize the importance of self-respect and self-esteem in relationships?
-The speaker emphasizes self-respect and self-esteem as foundational to healthy relationships. When a person values themselves and is not overly reliant on others for validation, they are less likely to be disrespected and can maintain a balanced and respectful relationship.
Outlines
💭 The Commitment Conundrum
The speaker discusses the dilemma of a relationship that has been ongoing for a few months without commitment. They mention the 'three-month rule' and the 'three or four day rule for men,' suggesting that if a person doesn't commit within this time, it's unlikely to happen. The speaker emphasizes the importance of non-verbal cues in signaling willingness to walk away and the potential negative impacts of prolonged uncertainty on one's behavior and self-esteem. They advise being direct and confronting the issue, as it can lead to respect and a more balanced relationship dynamic.
🗣️ Directness and Confrontation in Relationships
In this paragraph, the speaker advocates for direct communication in relationships, especially when there is a pattern of hot and cold behavior. They argue that being direct is a sign of confidence and can prevent an imbalanced power dynamic. The speaker also warns against accepting inconsistent behavior and suggests that calling out such behavior can prevent being taken advantage of. They highlight the importance of respect, which is earned through the willingness to confront and stand up for oneself.
🤯 The Impact of Emotional Dependency on Respect
The speaker delves into the concept of self-soothing and how the lack of it can lead to emotional dependency, which in turn can affect how one is perceived and respected in relationships. They discuss the importance of learning to manage emotions independently, as failing to do so can result in being taken advantage of or not being respected. The speaker also touches on the idea that people may test others to gauge their strength and that showing signs of weakness can lead to further disrespect.
🎓 Mindful Attraction University: Enhancing Dating Life
In the final paragraph, the speaker transitions to promoting their educational platform, the Mindful Attraction University, which offers courses aimed at improving one's dating life. They provide a special offer for purchasing all basic courses at a discounted rate and mention the possibility of upgrading to a premium version with additional content. The speaker expresses confidence in the effectiveness of their courses and encourages potential students to take advantage of the offer to transform their dating experiences.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Commitment
💡Chemistry
💡Three-month rule
💡Three or four date rule
💡Non-verbal cues
💡Confrontation
💡Respect
💡Hot and cold behavior
💡Self-esteem
💡Confrontational strength
💡Mindful Attraction University
Highlights
The 'three-month rule' for women and the 'three or four date rule' for men are discussed as indicators for commitment readiness.
Men are suggested to leave if a woman doesn't 'give up the pom pom' after three or four dates, indicating a lack of interest.
The importance of the 'two or three month rule' is emphasized to avoid desperate and creepy vibes in a relationship.
Non-verbal cues can reveal a person's willingness to walk away, affecting their confidence in a relationship.
Being direct with someone after a few months of dating is encouraged to establish clear intentions and expectations.
Fear of confrontation can lead to an imbalanced power dynamic and a lack of respect.
Confrontation is a way to bond and build stronger relationships, contrary to the fear that it may ruin them.
Calling out hot and cold behavior is advised to avoid being manipulated or taken advantage of.
People may test your strength to see if you are truly confident or if you show signs of weakness.
The willingness to fight back and stand up for oneself is a sign of strength that earns respect.
Self-esteem issues can lead to a lack of respect from others if one relies too heavily on others for validation.
The importance of self-soothing and the ability to handle emotions independently is discussed.
People who cannot self-soothe may be seen as weak and may be disrespected or taken advantage of.
The concept of respect as an earned quality, not a given, is introduced.
The speaker offers a discounted rate for a bundle of courses to improve dating life and emotional mastery.
A payment plan is available for the premium version of the courses, making them more accessible.
The speaker assures the effectiveness of the courses in transforming one's dating life.
Transcripts
hey coach I need your help with
something that's been on my mind I've
been seeing this person for a few months
now and while there's definitely
Chemistry Between Us they seem hesitant
to commit first of all there's a
three-month Rule and a three or 4 day
rule for men right three month rule for
women and three or four dat rule for men
right um for example for men if after
three or four months the girl doesn't
give up the pom pom
right most likely she's not going to
give it up right unless she's religious
that's the only exception now in general
if you want if you if you want a
relationship with someone generally if
after two or three months if they don't
want a relationship leave it's it's it's
never it's never going to work out in
fact I've never
seen I I mean I've seen but it's just
rare to go from um um for someone to
build a relationship after um after
after them not wanting it with did the
first two or three months because first
of all you're you the feelings you feel
for them is at its peak after two or in
within the first two or 3 months so
that's when they're going to make the
irrational decision to be in a
relationship with you okay okay I was so
mean oh my [ __ ] god it doesn't help
he doesn't have power he hurts right so
yeah that's the first thing um 203 month
rule if you do that it'll give you're
you're going to have an air of
willingness to walk away but actually
let me finish the story so that I can
tell you the rest um they seem hesitant
to commit we have an amazing time
together dinners long walks deep
conversations
that makes me feel like we're on the
same page but then just when I think
that we're getting closer they pull back
and things stay in this frustrating
limbo last weekend we spent the entire
day exploring the city laughing and
sharing stories at one point they looked
at me with such intensity that I felt
that something significant was going to
happen instead they changed the subject
and suggested we grab some coffee this
hot and cold behavor is making me
question what am I might be doing wrong
and if there's something missing that we
would make that would make me seem that
will make my worth and prioritize our
relationship what can I do to show them
that if someone is what can I do to show
someone that I'm worth committing to how
can I get them to respect and value me
enough to move forward without feeling
like I'm pressuring them first of okay
let's talk about this boo boo okay let's
talk about this first of all um the two
or three month rule
the two three month rule is the most
important rule why because it gives you
an end when you don't know when to leave
when you don't when you don't have a a
date a time when to finish this attempt
of a relationship it tends to give you
creepy um um um and um um desperate
Vibes when you're not you're you're
going to be sending out signs that
you're not willing to walk away and it
might you may not be holding a sign that
says you're not willing to walk away but
your non-verbal cues is going to give
them the Sensation that you're not
willing to walk away
like it's it's just the the things that
you don't notice about your non-verbal
cues are are are are going to be the
things that are going to tell people how
you actually feel inside so knowing to
leave knowing this prepares you prepares
your reactions so that you won't react
with neediness that means that if they
if they take a if they take a while to
respond to you you're not going to react
with fear and and and and and Terror
because in your mind you say if this
does doesn't go after if this doesn't
turn into a relationship after 2 or 3
months I'm leaving this so it it kind of
changes the way that you react to them
in such a way that your reaction is
going to give it's going to come across
as more confident because you are
willing to walk away you got to
understand the low simmering moods the
low moods that you that that stay on the
unconscious which is oh my God I hope I
hope I never leave this person those
types of mood not the mood of a mad
that's like surface level those low
moods like when you're hanging out with
but you know you're you're highly in
debt right so you're kind of smiling but
the mood of being in debt or the mood
that maybe you you're about to get your
ass beat when you get home because
you're late and you know your mom is
going to get you is going to you know
whoop your ass right that mood infects
your non-verbal cues more than your
current mood so be having that fear
inside and suppressing it because
everything seems good it's going to it's
going to automatically change your how
you react to people it's going to come
across as more um um um docile and less
confident and it's going to make people
more
aggressive so the and the next thing is
that you want to be directed with this
person if if it's been a few months of
being with them you have the you have
the permission to be direct you you if
because if why are you not being direct
what are you scared of you see what I'm
saying this fear of losing this person
causes you to not confront them and you
don't understand confrontation is what
makes people like you having conflict is
what makes people bond to you more
you're missing and and that's why I mean
the willingness to walk away will cause
you to be willing to confront them and
be honest with them about what you guys
want and and what type of relationship
you guys want with her that will H that
will come from that type of
mentality but when you really want to
make this work confrontation is
something that you fear because it could
actually ruin this they could actually
leave because you're confronting them so
be direct it's okay to have a
conversation after a month like it it's
totally fine the fact that you don't
want to be direct about the elephant in
the room makes the person realize that
you have weaknesses that you're hiding
through the facade of confidence and it
makes them more aggressive it makes them
test your weaknesses and it creates a
power an an imbalanced power
Dynamic so be direct man tell them don't
be in your head just say look man like
[ __ ] qu quintia the cold person right
like look you like you're giving hot and
cold Behavior man what's going on here
what do you want what are you looking
for that's not needy that's not needy
that's actually confident so be direct
and and even though they may not want
you the fact that you're being direct
makes them respect you more makes them
respect your uh um you as a person as
opposed to them knowing you want
something more them knowing you're
holding it down you're not speaking
about it and they actually end up losing
respect for you next thing it's just
never accept hot and cold Behavior like
what the hell like what the hell's going
on here call it out they rely on your
awkwardness on your fear of
Confrontation call that [ __ ] out because
if you don't you're just looking weak
right because sometimes the next thing
is that sometimes people are waiting to
sense your
strength right so sometimes people act
out and that's the fourth one sometimes
people act out to test your strength
sometimes people act out to see how
strong you really are and the fact that
you're not willing to call them out
tells them validates to them that maybe
they should be a little bit more
aggressive and and and take from you a
little bit more and give and give and
return
less so you got you got to do this you
have to confront you have to talk you
have to tell people what the [ __ ] you
want cuz it's been a few months if you
would have done the three-month rule
this would have never
happened so don't be afraid of
Confrontation you're when you're not
afraid of conf frontation you'll notice
that people will have more respect for
you you may not even need to confront
it's just the willingness to confront CH
give it changes the little things about
you that creates a sense of intimidation
that people just cannot point to they
like I don't know why this person just
looks like you don't want to [ __ ] with
them right and the last thing is that
respects respect comes when you're
willing to fight back respect comes when
you have the willingness to use your
sword and shield it's not that you have
to use it but you have a willingness to
use it that willingness is a reflection
of something deep in your character
something deep about your personality
and people can sense that they sense
when you're willing to die for something
they can sense when you when you truly
believe in something not because you say
you believe in it but because of how it
changes the little muscles and the
little reaction
that you are not even aware of you got
to understand the human animal pays and
values more the unconscious signals you
send and the reason why is because you
are you unconsciously pick up signals
and you know that you're picking it up
because you you pick it up because if it
creates a sensation about the person
right and we tend to We tend to go more
towards those people who tell us what to
do or who they are through your non
through their nonverbal little signals a
lot more than people who try to verbally
tell us who they
are and we without knowing it this
unwillingness to confront unwillingness
to speak unwillingness to have
confrontation and conflict is
unconsciously communicating to people
that you don't deserve respect that's
that that that that's just how that is
you know but when you're willing to do
that when you have when you're
consistently on Bronx mode
24/7 then people will sense that you
know what this person has something
behind his willingness to to do this in
other words you're willing to lose me it
means you have options and it means that
that other people also respect you so I
want to be with you like people think
that way if they don't respect you that
means other people don't respect you why
why am I why am I going to want to be
with you and why am I even giving you
respect if you don't if you can't earn
it like respect is not a freaking
charity people it's an economy that is
capitalistic that's self-interested and
it's something that you earn you're not
born with it it's not
church one more thing is that if you're
not happy this is really difficult to do
you know if you're not happy because
these the behavior that leads to
disrespect that leads to people to
looking down on you honestly is the type
of behavior that comes because you can't
self Soo like you you don't know how to
feel good about yourself and when you
were a kid like when kids don't get
don't get comfort from their parents
they start they they never learn how to
self soed when they never got physical
touch from their parents um and when
they grow up they they grow up without
learning how to do that because we first
learned how to self soit through our
parents and then through having that
comfortable environment we're able to
self Soo at a distance maybe she's you
know they're not holding us but maybe
because we know they're there we're able
to feel a little bit better using our
own strengths rather than just being
completely dependent on them and so we
learn how to self soed but some kids
just didn't have that and because of
that they learned to overly rely on
their on their parents not to not to
have any distance from their parents
because they just don't know how to do
it on their own or their their parents
never gave them the opportunity because
they use their kids as as their own
self- suu mechanism as a parent
sometimes you got to put your kid in a
[ __ ] corner and after after petting
them you know oh my [ __ ] god to talk
to like they're animals put them in the
corner and and just let you know be
there but let them know that you're
there but let them deal with their
emotions sometimes you know I'm not a
parent but that's we learn in child
development and so that distance helps
kids and so some people never had that
and so because of that they they never
learned how to deal with their emotions
on their own they only learned how to
deal with their
emotions using other people they they
were never weaned off of it and this
habit becomes a lifelong habit and when
people sense that you can't self so they
take advantage of that consciously or
unconsciously they take advantage of
that maybe I'm projecting people
whatever but they just take advantage of
that because the way you come across you
come across as someone that is always
happy right sometimes as someone who
doesn't fight back as someone who
doesn't get offended easily so he kind
of you can say [ __ ] you like ah you're
so funny but you're like dude I said
[ __ ] you like what the [ __ ] right and so
they they they they're more tolerant to
disrespect
you know because they they rather be
around you than not be around you and
not be disrespected they rather be
around you and be disrespected and so as
good of a person as they are you can't
respect that cuz you're like yo that's
pathetic like I mean I mean come on like
you get what I'm saying and so a lot of
people have developed their personality
around that trait and and deep down
these people feel resentful for not
getting respect by people but they don't
know that it's the it's the
desire you're using people as a vessel
of self-esteem and people resent that
they may not say oh my God I cannot
believe you're using me as a vess of
self-esteem I don't appreciate that says
Tyrone no they're like yo this person
doesn't give me space this person has no
boundaries this person is just like
[ __ ] a Teletubby that would with a
creepy smile like how you people just
cannot respect that you know so that's
the problem and that's the Dilemma
because this is what I'm telling you is
uncomfortable to some people
uncomfortable to some people who have
their lived their life this so remember
no one to leave
because It prepares your non-verbal cues
and your
reaction the two or three month rule if
they don't want a relationship at the
two or three months you leave and and
and and also if if they don't give up
the poom poom after two three or four
dates trust me you're your friend zone
right um be direct don't be don't be
afraid of Confrontation don't be afraid
of conflict conflict is what makes them
like you more never accept cold hot and
cold Behavior if they're acting and code
you you either mirror them if it's a
first if it's a first month but after
the the first month when you when you
have the the comfort and and the
permission to confront them you know cuz
you know sometimes first date you're not
going to call them on on the [ __ ]
right but like if they're acting hot and
cold and it's like a month already it's
best to just tell them what the hell do
you want let's not waste our time that
will cut the [ __ ] honesty is
something that manipulators and direct
direct honesty and direct confrontation
is something that manipulators and
people who are passive aggressive
aggression don't want they rely on you
being afraid of looking needy you get
what I'm saying who gives a [ __ ] anymore
right if they're giving you that
[ __ ] you confront them um sometimes
people are just waiting to sense your
strength so your reaction to their
[ __ ] and then your aggressive
self-righteous reaction to their
[ __ ] and willing to have that
conversation is what they were just
waiting for the whole time that's the
only thing that we're waiting
for and so people test you to see
whether or not you're strong the reason
why they test you is because maybe
you're given signs of weakness and they
want to see whether or not you're really
weak that's why people test you now some
rare occasions people test you because
you're strong and so they really want to
see if you're strong right but usually
the testing comes because you're giving
signs of weakness so it's better to not
give signs of weaknesses and I give and
I have a bunch of videos to to that talk
about how to not do that and that's last
one is that they respect when you're
willing to fight
back right just the willingness to fight
back just having that sense of having
your hand and Sh your hand on your on
your sword and shield in your hand
literally strengthens your nonverbal
cues it gives you a seriousness to your
character it's like being surrounded
with by people without a gun but now
being surrounded and you're the one that
has a gun but they don't know it you're
going to give up that old man anime type
of vibe that old man who's really strong
oh that that that Karate Kid the Chinese
guy that could fight right he's just Zen
that Zen out Vibe you're going to have
it when you have that energy man and
people will respect that sometimes it's
just they there's a lower likelihood
they're going to test you when they
sense these F these six things all right
ladies and gentlemen welcome to the
mindful attraction University taught by
Professor Alex where I teach you all of
the strategies to improve your dating
life and all of the courses that I have
all in one place and you can get it at a
highly discounted rate so that means you
purchase all of my basic courses without
the bundles usually at $600 $600 you can
purchase it now at $399 people not 400
$3.99 for psychological purposes yeah
that's right oh my [ __ ] got showing
as a scam yeah that's right yeah follow
Alex does that so that means you could
get emotional Mastery the psychological
game of Attraction the feminine woman
natural chemistry Charisma blueprint and
nice girl at a discounted rate but then
if you want to get the master's degree
of the mindful attraction University
taught by Professor Alex you can get the
premium version where usually all of the
courses cost cost one
$1,200 now you can purchase them all at
$7.99 or four payments of $200 you guys
can also do like a payment plan feminine
woman emotional Mastery the whole sh
Banger bang with all of the
bonuses at one lower price people and
with that honestly this is the type
thing that I know that if you guys get
it'll fix your dating life in ways you
guys cannot imagine Now My worry is that
it is a lot of content like it is and
I'm not a fan of giving people a lot of
content because I don't want
informational junkies but this is the
best way to get it all at all in one
price now look mind you it's no if you
purchase the bundle it I'm just going to
be honest there's no refunds purchasing
the whole bundles if you guys think you
guys are not going to like it I would
prefer if you buy if you guys buy one
course to see if you like it and if you
don't like that course you could get
your money back and don't purchase the
bundle right but if you like that course
you guys can send me an email and say
hey can I upgrade to the bundle pay the
difference and there you guys will get
it but it's just that look man you guys
know my content I if you like if you
like if you like one course you you like
it all right so that's the only caveat
but I know damn well if you if you
purchase it your dating life will never
be the same okay now for those who
purchase the courses but want to add to
the bundle you guys can m message me and
maybe we can come up with a price so
that you guys can get it um while being
able to not have to pay all the Crazy
Prices okay so now so just click on the
description down below there you'll see
um the ability to purchase the wifey
Bund the wiy basic package which is the
the one that you see here for $3.99
without the bundles and without the
bonuses but if you guys want to purchase
it with the bonuses which is a lot of
content and I afraid because there a lot
of content you guys can purchase it
right here with either four payments of
$200 or one time payment of $7.99 right
and yeah this is and by the way I made
this design you know father adic is
being inclusive here and stuff like that
um anyways hopefully you guys enjoy this
hopefully you guys can um support the
channel by purchasing those courses and
I'll see you guys inside bye-bye
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