How to gain RESPECT if you're young.

Doty
17 Dec 202313:13

Summary

TLDRIn this video, the speaker shares a personal story of being disrespected and how he gained respect through self-improvement. He emphasizes the importance of gaining weight and size to command respect, as well as behaving maturely and taking responsibility for one's actions. The speaker suggests imagining one's best self to guide behavior in challenging social situations and encourages viewers to stand up for themselves when disrespected, advocating for self-respect as a path to earning the respect of others.

Takeaways

  • 😟 The speaker shares a personal experience of being disrespected due to a lack of physical presence, highlighting the importance of gaining respect.
  • 💪 The speaker emphasizes the need to gain weight and muscle mass as a way to command respect, suggesting that physical size is often associated with strength and authority.
  • 🏋️‍♂️ The speaker recommends a bulking diet and weight training to increase size and muscle, which can lead to increased respect from peers.
  • 👨‍👦 The speaker discusses the evolutionary and societal perception that bigger individuals are more respected, which influences how they are treated.
  • 🤔 The speaker suggests that self-improvement, including gaining weight and building muscle, can lead to a base level of respect from others.
  • 🧠 The speaker advises on the importance of acting maturely, especially when faced with disrespect, as immaturity can invite further disrespect.
  • 💡 The speaker introduces the concept of 'Joseph 2.0' or one's best self, encouraging viewers to envision and act like their ideal mature version in various situations.
  • 🗣️ The speaker encourages assertive communication when disrespected, suggesting that calmly expressing one's feelings can deter further disrespect.
  • 🤝 The speaker stresses the importance of taking responsibility for one's own problems as a sign of maturity and a way to earn respect.
  • 💪 The speaker concludes by motivating the audience to work towards self-improvement, emphasizing that respect is earned through effort and personal growth.

Q & A

  • What was the situation described at the beginning of the script where the speaker felt disrespected?

    -The speaker was with a group of friends when one of them, who had started going to the gym, made a comment about the speaker's lack of muscle mass, leading to laughter from the others.

  • Why did the speaker feel that gaining mass was crucial for gaining respect?

    -The speaker believes that people are biologically wired to respect bigger individuals, as it is an evolutionary trait to associate size with strength and leadership, thus gaining mass is a must to command respect.

  • What specific goal did the speaker set for himself in terms of weight gain?

    -The speaker aimed to gain around 30 pounds, which is approximately 15 kg, and planned to add another 8 kg in the following year, with a target of reaching 80 kg.

  • How does the speaker suggest one should act when disrespected?

    -The speaker advises that one should act with maturity and assertiveness, calmly expressing disapproval of disrespectful behavior, rather than responding with humor or anger.

  • What is the concept of 'Joseph 2.0' mentioned in the script?

    -'Joseph 2.0' is the speaker's envisioned best version of himself, representing the ideal characteristics and behaviors he aspires to embody, such as maturity and respect.

  • Why is taking responsibility for one's own problems important according to the speaker?

    -The speaker emphasizes that taking responsibility for one's own problems is a sign of maturity and manliness, which is essential for earning respect and solving issues effectively.

  • How does the speaker suggest one should handle repeated disrespect from others?

    -The speaker recommends consistently and assertively communicating one's discomfort with the disrespectful behavior, which may eventually lead to the other person stopping the behavior.

  • What is the speaker's advice on how to improve one's social standing and gain respect?

    -The speaker advises to gain mass, act with maturity, take responsibility for one's problems, and model behavior after one's ideal self-image, such as 'Joseph 2.0'.

  • What is the significance of the speaker's advice on not making fun of others?

    -The speaker suggests that in order to gain respect, one must also show respect to others, implying that reciprocity and empathy are key components of earning and maintaining respect.

  • How does the speaker define maturity in the context of the script?

    -Maturity, as defined by the speaker, involves taking responsibility for one's problems, acting with assertiveness and respect, and demonstrating a consistent and adult-like demeanor in social interactions.

Outlines

00:00

💪 Gaining Respect Through Physical Change

The speaker shares a personal story about being disrespected due to a lack of physical presence. They recount an incident where a friend made fun of their lack of muscle mass, which led to introspection about how to gain respect. The speaker emphasizes the importance of first impressions and physical size in earning respect, suggesting that gaining weight and muscle mass is a crucial step towards being taken more seriously by others. They share their own experience of gaining 30 pounds over a year and a half and how it helped in building a foundation of respect. The speaker encourages setting a weight gain goal and focusing on resistance training to promote muscle growth, which can lead to increased respect from peers.

05:03

🧠 Acting Maturely to Earn Respect

The speaker discusses how personal behavior and maturity play a significant role in gaining respect. They reflect on past immaturity, such as laughing at their own expense when disrespected, and how it contributed to a perception of inferiority. The speaker advocates for taking responsibility for one's problems and actions as a sign of maturity, contrasting it with blaming others. They suggest imagining an ideal future self, 'Joseph 2.0', and emulating that version's behavior in current situations. The speaker provides a practice of envisioning this ideal self and using it as a guide for actions and responses, especially when faced with disrespect. They emphasize the importance of standing up for oneself in a mature and assertive manner, even if it feels uncomfortable, as a means to earn respect and change others' behavior.

10:05

🗣 Assertiveness and Self-Improvement for Respect

The speaker continues to stress the importance of assertiveness in communication to gain respect. They advise directly addressing disrespectful behavior by calmly expressing disapproval, which can be intimidating at first but is essential for self-respect. The speaker acknowledges the fear and discomfort that come with standing up for oneself but encourages persistence, as it leads to others respecting boundaries. They also touch on the concept of not expecting respect if one does not show it to others. The speaker concludes by reinforcing the idea of self-improvement and the belief that anyone can earn respect through consistent effort and by embodying the qualities of the best version of themselves.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Respect

Respect in this video refers to the esteem or regard that others have for an individual, which is a central theme. The narrator discusses how he initially lacked respect from his peers and outlines steps he took to earn it. For example, he mentions that people naturally respect those who appear larger or stronger, highlighting the evolutionary aspect of respect tied to physical presence.

💡Disrespect

Disrespect is the opposite of respect and is used in the script to describe the negative treatment the narrator received from his friends. It is exemplified when a friend publicly mocks the narrator's lack of muscle mass, which the narrator uses as a catalyst for change, aiming to transform his image and gain respect.

💡Muscle Mass

Muscle mass is a key concept in the video, where the narrator associates it with earning respect. He shares his personal journey of gaining approximately 30 pounds to increase his muscle mass, which he believes has contributed to the respect he now commands. The term is used to illustrate the physical transformation that can lead to a change in social perception.

💡Maturity

Maturity is discussed as a critical factor in gaining respect. The narrator contrasts acting like a 'little kid' with acting like a 'man,' suggesting that maturity involves taking responsibility for one's actions and responding to disrespect with calm assertiveness. He encourages viewers to act with maturity to command respect, as demonstrated by his advice to directly address disrespectful behavior.

💡Self-Improvement

Self-improvement is a recurring theme throughout the script, as the narrator emphasizes the need for personal growth to earn respect. He shares his own experiences with weight training and gaining mass as part of his self-improvement journey. The term encapsulates the broader message of the video, which is that individuals must work on themselves to gain the respect of others.

💡First Impression

First impression is mentioned as the initial judgment people make about others, often based on physical appearance. The narrator points out that people tend to respect those who appear larger, even if it's not just muscle, suggesting that first impressions are powerful in shaping social dynamics and respect.

💡Caloric Surplus

Caloric surplus is a dietary strategy mentioned by the narrator as part of his plan to gain weight and muscle mass. It refers to consuming more calories than one's body burns, which can lead to weight gain. The narrator uses this term to provide practical advice on how to achieve a physical transformation that can influence respect.

💡Evolutionary

The term 'evolutionary' is used to describe why people might instinctively respect larger individuals. The narrator suggests that this is a deep-seated, evolutionary response to physical size as an indicator of strength and power. This concept helps explain why gaining muscle mass is linked to gaining respect in the narrator's experience.

💡Responsibility

Responsibility is highlighted as a hallmark of maturity and a way to gain respect. The narrator advises taking responsibility for one's own problems and not blaming others, which he sees as a path to self-improvement and respect. He contrasts this with a tendency to blame others, which he associates with immaturity.

💡Assertiveness

Assertiveness is discussed as a way to handle disrespect. The narrator suggests that directly and calmly communicating one's feelings about disrespectful behavior is a mature response. He uses assertiveness as an example of how to stand up for oneself and earn respect, which is a key takeaway from his personal experiences.

💡Social Dynamics

Social dynamics are the interactions and relationships between individuals in a social setting. The narrator discusses how these dynamics can be influenced by physical appearance and behavior, and how altering these aspects can lead to increased respect. The term is used to describe the complex web of social interactions where respect is earned or lost.

Highlights

The importance of gaining respect from others and how it's tied to self-improvement.

A personal story about being disrespected due to physical appearance and the subsequent realizations.

The evolutionary perspective on why people tend to respect those who are physically larger.

The significance of first impressions and how physical size can influence respect.

The speaker's journey of gaining 30 pounds to improve self-esteem and command respect.

Advice on setting a weight gain goal to increase physical presence and respect.

The necessity of being in a caloric surplus and engaging in weight training for muscle growth.

The psychological impact of being disrespected and the importance of responding maturely.

The concept of maturity and how it's perceived by others in social interactions.

The idea that a boy becomes a man by taking responsibility for his own problems.

The practice of envisioning one's best self to guide behavior in challenging situations.

The strategy of confronting disrespectful behavior with assertiveness and maturity.

The importance of self-improvement and the belief that anyone can gain respect through effort.

The message that respect is not given freely but must be earned through personal development.

Encouragement to the audience to believe in their potential to gain respect and improve themselves.

Transcripts

play00:00

let me ask you a question aren't you

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tired of people disrespecting you you

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say you want to be respected yeah you

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don't do the things that would get you

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the respect that you want let me tell

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you a little story of mine so it was

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around 2 years ago I had just met up

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with some friends of mine one of them

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started to go to the gym and he was

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talking about how he's building muscle

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and stuff the thing was new we were all

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young and I remember this moment quite

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vividly when a guy the guy that went to

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the gym and we were we were a bunch of

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guys there we were like three four five

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guys and I remember the exact moment

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when that guy looked at me and said like

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look at this guy he doesn't even have

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any muscle mass and I you know I was

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sitting there I couldn't say anything

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what would you say in my situation I was

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a little twig of course I didn't say

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anything and I know the other guys

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looked at me they like laughed a bit and

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everything and I feel like

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[ __ ] you probably had this feeling

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before someone looks at you disrespects

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you says something bad to you and you

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don't even do [ __ ] about it or you do

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[ __ ] about it but you get into even

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worse position and you genuinely feel

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like [ __ ] I went home after that and I

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started thinking to myself what did I do

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wrong like why do these people

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disrespect me and it's normal it's

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normal because we want to be respected

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by the people around us it's a normal

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thing yeah we don't get it because we

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might not even deserve it but let me

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tell you how I got there let me tell you

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how I got a decent level of respect and

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I'm quite young I'm not an adult I don't

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have a business I don't have a family

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right but I got the respect of the men

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around me in my high school and I'm not

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that guy that gets thrown around and

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that gets made fun of I'm not that guy

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anymore I did some things that helped me

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get to this point and you must do them

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too if you find yourself in a situation

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where you don't really have the respect

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that you wanted to and this gets me to

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the first point of this video let me ask

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you a question when you look at someone

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let's say they come in a room and you're

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in the room and a guy walks in you've

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never seen him in your life what is the

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first thing that you notice about him

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it's how he looks you don't notice about

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him you don't know his emotions you

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don't know his past you don't know

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anything about him is the first

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impression that matters and it's not the

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face sh looks it's not the face many

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people might think that oh yeah it's the

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face I got to get the jawline I got to

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get the nice hair and everything no it's

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not the face you know what it is it's

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the size of the guy you need to be brly

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honest when you see a big guy you can't

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help but respect him you can't help but

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like move out the way when he walks in

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front of you even if it's not all muscle

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even if it's a little fat you cannot

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help but respect him a little more

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because we are wired to think that

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bigger guys are more respected they're

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Alpha and it's just evolutionary in our

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minds so the first thing that you must

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do it's a must when you want to get

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respect is to gain gain Mass gain weight

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many people these days just want to be

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lean just they just want to be shredded

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they want to have the Joline and

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everything and that is nice but you need

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to gain weight if you want to be

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respected and that's the first thing

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that I did that started getting me

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respect in the past year and a half I've

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gained around 30 30 lb which is like

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almost 15 kg and I'm planning to do like

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another 8 kg the next year like another

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five the next year I want to get that up

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to like 80 kg because that's what got me

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the base of the respect if you're like a

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little twig if you're like skinny if

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you're short we can't do much things

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about height but if you're like skinny

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and you don't really have much mass on

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you you cannot expect people to treat

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you well what you want to do is be on a

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bulk be in a caloric Surplus eat more

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and you want to do all of this whilst

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weight training whilst having some

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resistance training that would that

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would promote muscle growth and that way

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you'll build muscle you might gain some

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fat but it's not even that bad like a

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little fat that will make you a little

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bit bigger of course we want most of

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that to be muscle but you need to

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increase your size I want this to be one

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of your biggest goals your biggest goals

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take a pen and a piece of paper and

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write it down and put it on your wall to

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gain x amount of weight by next year is

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December of 2023 by December of 2024 you

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need to have a weight gain goal right

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now if you already have it you can tell

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me right now I don't care pause this

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video get off the video I don't care if

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the retention of this video drops I

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don't give a [ __ ] I just want to see you

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write that thing down cuz I care for you

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cuz I was like this too and I wish

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someone had told me this and let me ask

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you a question now how do you behave

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around other people let's say someone

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disrespects you right how do you how do

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you do with in that situation what do

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you do someone disrespects you how do

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you act do you act like a little kid or

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do you act like a man which one of these

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are you when you're talking to people do

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you like go and tell some memes or stuff

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and start joking around like a little

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kid let me ask you another question how

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do people perceive you if you can see

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yourself from a third person perspective

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Ive would you see you as like a man or

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would you see you like a little boy when

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people used to disrespect me I would I

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would laugh at their joke about me I

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would laugh about myself acting like a

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little boy and I feel like [ __ ] inside

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like you're so stupid Joseph and I was

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yeah what the [ __ ] is this you need to

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start acting with maturity when you get

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insulted deeply and you feel it that's

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not a nice feeling is it that's not a

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good feeling to have because you also

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think to yourself that you're

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inferior when someone insults you you're

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now an

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inferior everyone around you is higher

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than you and when people do that to you

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that that's a sign that you're not

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mature that's a sign that you let those

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people do that to you if you are a

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mature if you are a man those people

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will not behave like this around you the

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people who insult you would not insult

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you how do you become more like a man

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how do you become more mature how when

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does a boy become a man a boy becomes a

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man when he starts taking responsibility

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of his own problems and don't take it

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from me I don't say

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it actual men say it don't take it from

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me I'm not that that big of a man I'm

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just telling you the things that started

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to help me I'm not this man that you

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should look up to cuz I'm on the same

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level as you I'm still trying to become

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a man don't you think that I'm I'm this

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guy this big man I'm still making the

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transition from boy to man I need to

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humble myself so we need to take

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responsibility over our problems cuz

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it's not a thing that many many guys

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they're not men many guys do they don't

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even take responsibility over their own

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problems but if you imagine like how a

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man used to live 100 years ago you would

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see a masculine man who owned every

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single one of his problems and was so so

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so manly that he was able to

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to to take own ownership of others

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problems of his wife's problems of his

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children's problems if you want to be a

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mature mature man you need to be able to

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take your own problems and solve them

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cuz we have problems and many times we

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want to blame that to somebody else and

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I found myself doing this and I'm as

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shame of it but we need to start

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thinking every single thing start

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thinking of a problem in your life I

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don't know what problems you have start

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thinking of a problem in your life life

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if you think that that problem is some

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is made because of somebody else you're

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a little [ __ ] every single problem that

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you have you need to take it as your own

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and you need to solve it it's your

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problem your demand nobody's going to

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save you you need to save yourself even

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if you're right even if let's say

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someone else made that problem you still

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need to be able to own it you still need

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to be able to work hard enough so that

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be so that you become mature maturity

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doesn't come from just owning your

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problems or just doing this just doing

play08:00

that it comes from everything it comes

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from not making stupid jokes it it comes

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from acting like an adult it comes from

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taking

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responsibility it comes from caring

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about others so a little practice that I

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want to give you on this point is close

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your eyes right now I'm going to do this

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myself and think of your future self

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think of the best ever version of

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yourself how the guy looks how the guy

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acts think of that guy give it maybe a

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name and let me tell you mine my version

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of my best self is called Joseph 2.0 and

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think about that guy the best version of

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yourself maybe he has beautiful woman by

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by his side maybe he has the respect of

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other men maybe he has money maybe he

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has this that anything that you want in

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life think about it as the version of

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yourself who has it think about that guy

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give that guy a name and anytime you're

play08:52

in a certain situation and you don't

play08:54

know what to do ask yourself what would

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the best version of my myself do what

play09:00

would Joseph 2.0 do cuz that's the best

play09:03

version of myself I called it I call it

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Joseph 2.0 so I often throughout the day

play09:08

I just ask myself what would Joseph 2.0

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do that guy the man that I want to

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become what would that guy do have a

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conversation with your future self

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whenever you feel like you're down

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whenever you feel like you feel like a

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little boy what would that guy do in a

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social situation when someone

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disrespects you ask yourself what would

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that I do let's say someone disrespects

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you maybe it's even even a social like

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place like at school someone comes at

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you and tells you a joke about yourself

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he makes fun of your look at Joseph he

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has this little shirt he looks so stupid

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in that shirt right and everybody's

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laughing and stuff like this what do you

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do in that situation well how do you act

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like a man what would the best version

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of yourself do and let me tell you this

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is what they would do you need to look

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into their eyes simple mature and just

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tell them

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I don't like the way you speak to me I

play10:02

don't think you should talk to me like

play10:04

that

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simple nothing more and now you might

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think to yourself that oh my goodness I

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can't do that because I I'm scared I

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won't do the not people think I'm cringe

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you might have all of these thoughts in

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your head that's maybe because you're

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not mature enough you're scared because

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you're not mature

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enough but you need to realize that this

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is the only way you need to tell them

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straight honest I don't like the way

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you're talking to me I don't think this

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is a good way to communicate with me and

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they might not even be done one day two

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days three days pass by and they might

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tell you that joke again they might make

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fun of you

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again that might happen I'm not going to

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tell you that it's not going to happen

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but you need to be ready cuz it might

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happen in that case you just need you

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just tell them like I told you I don't

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like the way you're talking to me I know

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you might have a problem but I don't

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really want people people to talk to me

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this way you can you can just tell them

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like I never talk to you this way if you

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make jokes and you make fun of them also

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don't expect don't expect to get respect

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if you make fun of them if you don't

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respect them they won't respect you but

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if they if you never told them anything

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bad about themselves or made fun of them

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and they come at you and they make fun

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of you you should totally tell them I

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don't like the way they were talking to

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me I don't think we can be friends

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anymore or stuff like this go and tell

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them and after you do this one time two

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times they will actually start feeling

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uncomfortable they would feel

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uncomfortable and they they'll leave you

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alone they won't tell you she like this

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anymore because you are mature enough to

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tell them this not many people do this

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it's not comfortable but that's how you

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get there and I really hope that you can

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get there I really believe that you if

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you watch this you can become that guy

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who gets the respect don't forget to ask

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yourself what would the best version of

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myself what would Joseph to doing that

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situation my name is Joseph that's why I

play12:01

sell it but whatever you 2.0 is whatever

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your name is whatever that version of

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yourself does ask yourself what would

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that guy

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do start putting on the mass the

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kilograms the size and you'll get there

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I truly believe that you'll get there

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but you need to you need to prove to the

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world you need to prove to the world

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that you deserve it and when you prove

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to the world that you deserve it you'll

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actually get it

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Nothing in life comes easy Nothing in

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life will come to you without a price

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you need to pay that price and respect

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does have a price to pay and again I'm

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not this big masculine guy I'm not the

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big man who can tell you about

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everything about respect but these are

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the things that I did to get respect of

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other men and I'm young I'm young and

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young people are often disrespected but

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I I was able to get a decent amount of

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respect and I don't really get made made

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fun of not not at all you can get there

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bro and I truly believe in you just

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continue to do the thing that's good the

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self-improvement habits you'll get there

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bro don't worry but you got to work for

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it

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相关标签
Self-RespectPersonal GrowthMaturityBody ImageSocial DynamicsWeight TrainingEmotional IntelligenceSelf-ImprovementAssertivenessConfidence Building
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