ฟังอย่างลึกซึ้ง (Deep listening)

Sean B. Hiran - ฌอน บูรณะหิรัญ

8 Aug 201603:38

Summary

TLDRThe transcript emphasizes the transformative power of deep, compassionate listening as a means to alleviate suffering and foster understanding. It suggests that by listening without the intent to advise immediately, we offer a safe space for individuals to express their emotions, which can lead to healing. The speaker advocates for the practice of deep listening to correct misperceptions, which are often the root of conflicts, including terrorism. The approach involves sincere communication, expressing a desire to understand the other's suffering, and using this understanding to resolve disputes, whether personal or societal.

Takeaways

👂 Deep Listening: The concept of deep listening is introduced as a compassionate form of listening aimed at relieving the suffering of others by allowing them to express themselves fully.
🤔 Perception and Suffering: Wrong perceptions about oneself and others are identified as the root of fear, anger, and despair, which can lead to conflict and violence.
💡 Transformative Potential: One hour of deep listening can lead to transformation and healing, suggesting the power of compassionate communication.
🌟 Venting and Healing: Allowing individuals to vent their feelings without interruption can be a healing process, which is more effective than immediately offering advice.
🤝 Communication for Peace: Effective communication between people is highlighted as the key to ending conflicts, including those on a large scale like terrorism.
🗣️ Loving Speech: The speaker advocates for starting conversations with 'loving speech,' expressing a genuine desire to understand and alleviate the suffering of others.
👂 Openness to Learn: Encouraging the opening of one's heart through honest and true communication, which can lead to a deeper understanding of both parties' perceptions.
👨‍👦‍👦 Conflict Resolution: The principle of deep listening and compassionate understanding is applicable to various conflicts, including those between family members or friends.
🌱 Personal Growth: The process of deep listening contributes to personal growth by helping individuals learn about their own and others' perceptions.
🔄 Perception Correction: It is suggested that correcting wrong perceptions at the right time, after deep listening, can help resolve conflicts and misunderstandings.

Q & A

What is the concept of 'deep listening' as mentioned in the transcript?
-Deep listening is a form of compassionate listening where the listener's sole purpose is to help the speaker empty their heart of suffering. It involves listening without judgment, even when the speaker's perceptions may be wrong or full of bitterness, with the aim of reducing their suffering.
Why is deep listening considered transformative and healing?
-Deep listening is transformative and healing because it allows the speaker to vent their feelings and emotions without interruption. This process can lead to a deeper understanding and resolution of conflicts, as it provides a safe space for expression and emotional release.
How does deep listening relate to the concept of compassionate communication?
-Deep listening is a key component of compassionate communication. It involves listening with empathy and the intent to understand the other person's suffering, which can foster a deeper connection and mutual understanding.
What is the role of perception in causing conflict according to the transcript?
-Perception plays a significant role in causing conflict. Wrong perceptions about oneself and others form the basis for misunderstandings, disagreements, and even violence. These perceptions can be corrected through open communication and deep listening.
How can deep listening help in resolving conflicts between different parties?
-Deep listening can help resolve conflicts by allowing each party to express their suffering and difficulties without judgment. This approach promotes understanding and empathy, which can lead to the resolution of issues and the prevention of further conflict.
What is the importance of expressing the intent not to cause more suffering when practicing deep listening?
-Expressing the intent not to cause more suffering is crucial as it sets the tone for a safe and open conversation. It reassures the speaker that the listener is genuinely interested in understanding their suffering, which encourages them to open up and share their experiences.
How can the practice of deep listening be applied in personal relationships, such as between family members?
-Deep listening can be applied in personal relationships by setting aside judgment and focusing on understanding the other person's perspective. It involves actively listening to their experiences and emotions, which can lead to better communication and stronger relationships.
What is the significance of 'loving speech' in the context of deep listening?
-Loving speech is an honest and sincere way of communicating that is free from blame or criticism. It is an essential part of deep listening as it creates a supportive environment where the speaker feels heard and understood.
How does the process of deep listening contribute to personal growth and self-awareness?
-Deep listening contributes to personal growth and self-awareness by allowing the listener to learn about their own perceptions and biases. It promotes introspection and the ability to recognize and correct one's own misconceptions.
Can the principles of deep listening be applied to resolve larger scale conflicts, such as between nations or groups with opposing views?
-Yes, the principles of deep listening can be applied to resolve larger scale conflicts. By fostering open communication, understanding, and empathy, deep listening can help bridge divides and pave the way for peaceful resolutions.
What is the potential impact of practicing deep listening on society as a whole?
-Practicing deep listening on a societal level can lead to a more compassionate and understanding community. It can reduce misunderstandings, promote empathy, and contribute to a more harmonious and peaceful society.

Outlines

00:00

🌱 Deep Listening for Healing

This paragraph discusses the concept of deep listening, a form of compassionate listening aimed at alleviating the suffering of others. It emphasizes the importance of listening with the sole purpose of helping the speaker to express their feelings and reduce their suffering, regardless of the content of their speech. The speaker suggests that deep listening can lead to transformation and healing, and contrasts it with the common approach of immediately offering advice. The paragraph also touches on the idea that conflicts often stem from wrong perceptions, and that deep listening can be a tool for correcting these perceptions and resolving conflicts, including those on a large scale such as between terrorists and anti-terrorists.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Deep Listening

Deep listening is a form of attentive and empathetic hearing where the listener suspends their own thoughts and judgments to fully comprehend the speaker's emotions and experiences. In the context of the video, it is portrayed as a compassionate act aimed at alleviating the suffering of the speaker by allowing them to express their feelings without interruption. An example from the script is the suggestion to listen with the sole purpose of helping the person to 'empty their heart,' which illustrates the profound impact of truly being heard.

💡Compassion

Compassion is the feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another's suffering, coupled with the desire to alleviate it. The video emphasizes compassion as a fundamental aspect of deep listening, where the listener is not there to judge but to understand and empathize with the person's pain. The script mentions continuing to listen with compassion even when the speaker's words are 'full of wrong perceptions full of bitterness,' highlighting the importance of an open-hearted approach to communication.

💡Suffering

Suffering in the video is depicted as a universal human experience that can be alleviated through understanding and communication. It is the core issue that deep listening aims to address. The script discusses the transformative potential of deep listening in reducing suffering, suggesting that by allowing individuals to express their pain, one can help them experience 'less suffering.'

💡Perception

Perception in this context refers to the way individuals interpret and understand the world around them, which can often be flawed or biased. The video suggests that wrong perceptions are at the root of conflict and suffering. The script points out the need to correct these perceptions, indicating that deep listening can provide a safe space for individuals to recognize and challenge their own and others' perceptions.

💡Conflict

Conflict is presented in the video as a result of misunderstandings and wrong perceptions between individuals or groups. It is the antithesis of the harmony that deep listening and compassionate communication can foster. The script uses the term in various contexts, such as 'conflict and war,' 'terrorist and anti-terrorist,' and personal relationships, emphasizing that the principles of deep listening can be applied universally to resolve disputes.

💡Communication

Effective communication is highlighted as a crucial tool for resolving conflicts and misunderstandings. The video stresses the importance of open, honest, and empathetic dialogue. An example from the script is the suggestion to start conversations with phrases like 'dear friends, dear people,' which sets a tone of respect and willingness to understand, facilitating deeper connections and potentially resolving conflicts.

💡Transformation

Transformation in the video refers to the profound change that can occur in individuals and relationships through the practice of deep listening and compassionate communication. The script mentions that an hour of deep listening can bring about healing and transformation, indicating that this process has the power to fundamentally alter one's state of being and relationships with others.

💡Healing

Healing is portrayed as a natural outcome of deep listening and compassionate communication. It is the process of recovery from emotional or psychological distress. The script suggests that by allowing individuals to express their feelings without judgment, deep listening can lead to a deeper level of healing, both for the speaker and the listener.

💡Loving Speech

Loving speech, as mentioned in the video, is a form of communication that is characterized by sincerity, empathy, and the intention to understand and alleviate the suffering of others. The script provides an example of how to initiate a conversation with loving speech, which includes acknowledging the other person's suffering and expressing a genuine desire to understand their difficulties.

💡Understanding

Understanding in the context of the video is the goal of deep listening and compassionate communication. It involves recognizing and empathizing with the experiences and feelings of others. The script emphasizes the importance of understanding as a means to resolve conflicts and build stronger relationships, stating that by practicing deep listening, both parties can learn about their own and each other's perceptions.

💡Terrorism

Terrorism is used in the video as an extreme example of conflict that arises from deep-seated misunderstandings and wrong perceptions. The script suggests that the same principles of deep listening and compassionate communication that can resolve personal conflicts can also be applied to larger societal issues like terrorism, indicating the broad applicability of these practices in fostering peace.

Highlights

Deep listening is a form of compassionate listening aimed at relieving the suffering of others by helping them empty their hearts.

Listening with compassion allows one to continue even when faced with wrong perceptions and bitterness, providing a chance for less suffering.

The purpose of deep listening is to help the speaker suffer less, with the intention to correct perceptions at a more appropriate time.

An hour of deep listening can bring about transformation and healing.

Deep listening allows for the venting of emotions without interruption, leading to a deeper healing process.

Conflict and war often stem from wrong perceptions about ourselves and others, which can be addressed through deep listening.

Communication is key to ending words and resolving conflicts, starting with acknowledging the other person's suffering.

The approach of expressing empathy and a desire to understand can open hearts and facilitate honest communication.

Practicing deep listening helps in learning about our own and others' perceptions, which is crucial for resolving conflicts.

The principle of deep listening applies to all levels of conflict, from personal to global issues.

Deep listening can be a powerful tool in resolving even the most intense conflicts, such as between terrorists and anti-terrorists.

The same principles of deep listening can be applied to personal relationships, such as between family members.

The process of deep listening involves a genuine willingness to understand the other person's difficulties and suffering.

Loving speech and honesty are essential components of initiating deep listening and resolving conflicts.

Deep listening is not just about hearing words but understanding the emotions and perceptions behind them.

The transformation that occurs through deep listening can lead to a more peaceful and understanding society.

The practice of deep listening encourages a shift from a reactive to a proactive approach in communication and conflict resolution.