4 “Toxic” Behaviors That Improved My Mental Health

Summary

In this video, the speaker explores four 'toxic' behaviors that have actually improved their mental health. These behaviors include invalidating irrational feelings, working long hours with minimal breaks, prioritizing self-care, and using physical activity, like gym workouts, as therapy. While these actions may be seen as counterproductive by conventional standards, the speaker explains how they’ve personally found them to be beneficial for mental well-being. The video encourages viewers to reconsider the traditional 'toxic' labels and think about how certain behaviors, when adjusted, can positively impact mental health.

Takeaways

• 😀 Not all things labeled as 'toxic' are harmful – some behaviors may have benefits for mental health.
• 😀 Invalidating certain feelings can be helpful, especially when emotions are disconnected from reality or brain chemistry.
• 😀 It's important to recognize that feelings don't always serve as accurate guides for decision-making.
• 😀 Excessive validation of all emotions can be a privilege for those without cyclical mood disorders.
• 😀 Working without frequent breaks may improve productivity and help maintain focus for some people.
• 😀 Short breaks can disrupt workflow and create a mental block when transitioning back into work mode.
• 😀 Defining 'work' as progress toward any goal, not just paid employment, helps frame personal projects as valuable.
• 😀 Putting personal needs first is not selfish – it's necessary for being able to show up as the best version of yourself for others.
• 😀 Taking care of your physical health can improve your emotional regulation and overall well-being.
• 😀 Physical activity, like going to the gym, plays a crucial role in mental health and should be incorporated into self-care routines.
• 😀 Mental health is supported by both therapy and physical activity, with the latter enhancing brain function and emotional stability.

Q & A

Why has the word 'toxic' become so commonly used in recent times?

The word 'toxic' has been increasingly used as a prefix to label behaviors, cultures, and traits we dislike, such as toxic positivity, toxic masculinity, and toxic workplace culture. It has become shorthand for anything perceived as harmful or detrimental.

What is the first 'toxic' behavior the speaker engages in to improve their mental health?

The first behavior is invalidating their own feelings, which the speaker believes is helpful when those feelings are contradictory, baseless, or not grounded in reality. They argue that not all feelings should be taken seriously, especially when dealing with mental health disorders.

How does the speaker justify invalidating their feelings despite common mental health advice?

The speaker argues that not all feelings are valid, especially for individuals with mood disorders. They emphasize that some feelings may be inaccurate or based on temporary brain misfires, and dismissing these feelings helps avoid making decisions based on flawed emotions.

What is the second 'toxic' behavior the speaker engages in for their mental health?

The second behavior is working long hours without taking frequent breaks. The speaker prefers long, uninterrupted work periods because taking breaks disrupts their momentum and makes it harder to get back into work mode.

Why does the speaker avoid taking breaks during long work periods?

The speaker finds that taking breaks, such as after every client or hour, disrupts their flow. They liken this to Newton’s First Law of Motion—once they stop, they have a harder time getting back into work mode, and maintaining continuous work is more productive for them.

What does the speaker mean by 'work' in their definition?

The speaker defines 'work' as any activity that moves them towards their personal goals, not just tasks associated with employment. This includes things like fitness goals, organizing their home, or any other productive pursuit.

How does the speaker view the concept of self-care?

The speaker views self-care as essential for being able to help others effectively. Taking care of their own physical and mental health allows them to show up better for their family, clients, and others they care about, making self-care a selfless act rather than a selfish one.

What is the third 'toxic' behavior that has helped the speaker's mental health?

The third behavior is putting their own needs first, specifically in terms of self-care activities like physical exercise, good nutrition, and managing mental health. The speaker believes prioritizing self-care is essential for being able to contribute positively to others' lives.

How does the speaker argue that self-care can be selfless?

The speaker believes that self-care is selfless because taking care of one’s own needs enables them to be a better partner, parent, and professional. If they neglect their own health, they risk being unable to show up for others, which is ultimately detrimental to everyone.

What is the fourth 'toxic' behavior that the speaker engages in, and why is it beneficial?

The fourth behavior is using physical activity, specifically the gym, as a form of therapy. The speaker emphasizes that regular exercise is crucial for mental health, as it improves brain function, emotion regulation, and overall well-being.

How does physical activity help improve mental health according to the speaker?

Physical activity helps improve mental health by optimizing brain function. It ensures that the brain receives essential resources like oxygen and blood, which support emotional regulation, decision-making, and cognitive function.

Does the speaker suggest that physical activity can replace therapy or medication?

No, the speaker does not claim that physical activity can replace professional therapy or medication. However, they do consider it an essential part of a well-rounded mental health routine, stating that physical health is critical for maintaining mental well-being.

What impact does the speaker's physical activity routine have on their personal life?

The speaker reports that physical activity improves their mood, energy levels, and focus. It also helps them to regulate emotions and be more present for their family and clients, indicating that a regular exercise routine is a key part of their mental health and daily life.