Therapist explains: AVOIDANTS do THIS when they LOVE you

Summary

This video explores the journey of individuals with avoidant attachment styles as they open up emotionally and begin to show love in their relationships. The speaker highlights key signs of an avoidant person falling in love, such as sharing day-to-day stressors, revealing past experiences, making compromises, and admitting efforts to change. The video emphasizes the gradual process of healing and self-awareness for avoidants, illustrating how they start to take proactive steps to connect more deeply with their partners. The overall message is about the challenges and growth avoidants experience as they learn to trust and love more openly.

Takeaways

• 😀 Avoidant individuals tend to become more open about their day-to-day stressors when they begin to care deeply about someone.
• 😀 Sharing their past, such as childhood memories or past relationships, is a key sign that an avoidant is falling in love and trusts their partner.
• 😀 Small gestures like revealing their favorite foods or personal stories can indicate an avoidant's growing emotional intimacy.
• 😀 Avoidants often resist compromises, but when they start agreeing to things their partner requests (like a vacation), it signals they’re becoming more flexible for the relationship.
• 😀 If an avoidant admits they're trying to change and work on their issues, it shows they are committed to improving the relationship.
• 😀 It’s important to be patient with avoidants as they confront their fears of vulnerability and open up to emotional intimacy.
• 😀 The act of opening up about personal struggles without being prompted is a huge step for an avoidant in showing trust and affection.
• 😀 An avoidant may start seeking therapy or other help to work through their emotional barriers, reflecting their desire to improve their connection with their partner.
• 😀 Avoidants may take longer to express their feelings, but when they do, it usually signifies a significant step in emotional growth.
• 😀 The process of an avoidant learning to share and compromise in the relationship indicates they are moving toward deeper emotional engagement and attachment.

Q & A

What is one sign that an avoidant person may be falling in love?

One sign is when an avoidant person begins to open up about their day-to-day stressors, such as work meetings or personal challenges. This indicates they're becoming more emotionally engaged and trusting their partner.

Why is it significant when an avoidant person shares details about their past?

When an avoidant person shares personal stories about their childhood, past relationships, or struggles, it shows they are allowing their partner to know them on a deeper level. This level of vulnerability is typically difficult for avoidants, so it's a sign of growing trust and emotional connection.

How do avoidant people typically respond to requests from their partner?

Avoidants often resist making compromises or fulfilling requests. However, when they begin to do things they've been asked to do, such as planning a vacation or participating in activities they usually avoid, it signifies that they're making an effort to show love and meet their partner's needs.

What does it mean when an avoidant person admits they are trying to change?

When an avoidant person acknowledges their need to change and actively works on it, such as seeking therapy or asking for patience, it shows they are committed to improving the relationship and overcoming their attachment barriers.

What is the role of compromise in an avoidant person's behavior when they fall in love?

Compromise is difficult for avoidants, but when they start compromising—such as planning a vacation despite disliking it—it demonstrates their willingness to make sacrifices for their partner's happiness, indicating deeper emotional engagement.

How can you tell that an avoidant person is starting to care more about their partner?

When an avoidant person starts sharing personal details about their life and opens up about past experiences, it’s a sign they are becoming more emotionally involved and trusting their partner.

Why might an avoidant person struggle to admit they love someone?

Avoidant individuals often have a deep fear of vulnerability and rejection, making it challenging for them to express their emotions openly. This fear can lead to difficulty admitting love, even if they feel it.

What does it mean when an avoidant person starts sharing small details about their life, such as favorite foods?

Sharing seemingly insignificant details, like favorite foods or personal preferences, signifies that an avoidant person is becoming more open and self-aware. It is a sign that they trust their partner and feel more comfortable being vulnerable.

How do avoidant individuals handle stress and emotional distance in a relationship?

Initially, avoidant individuals may shut down or become distant when stressed, but as they grow emotionally connected with their partner, they start to communicate their stressors openly, showing an effort to stay engaged in the relationship.

What is the significance of an avoidant person working with a therapist on their attachment issues?

When an avoidant person works with a therapist to address their attachment issues, it shows they are actively trying to heal and improve their ability to connect with their partner. This willingness to address their fears and insecurities is a major step toward emotional growth and intimacy.