Cultivating a culture of inclusion

Summary

The speaker addresses the challenges of being misunderstood due to assumptions based on appearance and speech. They share experiences of being mistaken for different nationalities and sexual orientations, and emphasize the importance of being open-minded when getting to know someone different. The speaker advises asking questions to understand others better, being aware of body language, and being respectful in inquiries. They highlight the value of letting go of biases, learning from mistakes, and embracing diversity as a social responsibility, noting that the next generation is even more open and fluid, making it crucial to adapt and be considerate.

Takeaways

• 🧐 People often make assumptions based on appearance, which can lead to misunderstandings.
• 🏳️‍🌈 It's important to correct misconceptions about one's identity, such as sexual orientation and personal relationships.
• 👴 The speaker has worked in banking for 40 years and feels that their experience is sometimes overlooked due to stereotypes.
• 🔍 People tend to categorize others quickly, which can limit understanding and interaction.
• 🤔 To get to know someone different, one should be open and ask questions that reveal more about the person's character.
• 🚫 Avoid defining someone by their religion or personal beliefs; focus on who they are as an individual.
• 💬 Communication is key; sharing personal experiences can help build trust and understanding.
• 🤝 Body language is a powerful tool in conveying honesty and openness in conversations.
• 🙅‍♂️ Be mindful of how questions are asked; abrupt or insensitive inquiries can be off-putting.
• 🌈 Recognize that there is more to life than binary categories; there are diverse ways of living and cultures to explore.
• 💡 Letting go of biases and being willing to learn is crucial for personal growth and social harmony.
• 🤓 Being open to making mistakes and learning from them is part of the process of understanding others.
• 👶 The younger generation is more open and fluid in their views, setting a precedent for societal change.
• 🌐 It's a social responsibility to be sensitive and considerate to those who are different from us.
• 🔑 The effort to understand someone can lead to exciting discoveries and new learning opportunities.

Q & A

Why do people often make assumptions about others based on their appearance?

People tend to make assumptions based on appearance due to societal stereotypes and preconceived notions. This can lead to incorrect judgments about someone's background or identity.

What challenges does the speaker face regarding their identity and the assumptions made by others?

The speaker faces challenges such as being mistaken for being from Asia or having a wife instead of a boyfriend, and being perceived as a 'dinosaur' at work due to their long tenure, which can overshadow their valuable knowledge and experience.

How does the speaker describe their experience with being bisexual and the misconceptions they encounter?

The speaker mentions that people often ask if they are seeing both a boy and a girl at the same time, which reflects a misunderstanding of bisexuality and the assumption that bisexual individuals must be in relationships with both genders simultaneously.

What advice does the speaker give for getting to know someone who is different from oneself?

The speaker advises being open, asking thoughtful questions, and being willing to let go of biases. They emphasize the importance of body language and the way questions are asked, suggesting that being respectful and genuine is key.

Why is it important to be open-minded and not afraid of making mistakes when getting to know someone different?

Being open-minded and not afraid of making mistakes allows for genuine learning and understanding. It fosters an environment where people can correct misunderstandings and grow in their knowledge and acceptance of diversity.

What does the speaker suggest is a common mistake people make when asking about someone's background or origin?

A common mistake is being abrupt or presumptuous in asking questions like 'where are you from?' which can be off-putting and may lead to the person feeling judged or misunderstood.

How does the speaker feel about the importance of being sensitive and considerate towards people who are different from us?

The speaker believes it is a social responsibility to be sensitive and considerate. They argue that making the effort to understand and accept others can lead to exciting discoveries and learning opportunities.

What is the speaker's perspective on the younger generation's approach to diversity and acceptance?

The speaker views the younger generation as being more open and fluid in their approach to diversity, suggesting that there is a growing acceptance and understanding of different lifestyles and cultures.

How can one avoid making assumptions and instead foster a genuine connection with someone different?

One can avoid assumptions by actively listening, asking open-ended questions, and being willing to learn. It's also important to share a bit about oneself to build trust and show genuine interest in the other person's experiences.

What is the speaker's view on the importance of body language in communication?

The speaker believes that body language is one of the biggest indicators of truth and can convey a lot about a person's feelings and intentions. It plays a crucial role in establishing trust and rapport.

How does the speaker define their identity in relation to their religion and personal beliefs?

The speaker asserts that their identity is distinct from their religion, which is a personal belief. They emphasize that who they are as a person is multifaceted and cannot be defined by a single aspect such as religion.

Outlines

00:00

🌏 Overcoming Assumptions and Stereotypes

The speaker discusses the common issue of being misidentified or stereotyped based on appearance or accent. They share personal experiences of being mistaken for different nationalities and sexual orientations, and the importance of challenging these assumptions. The speaker, who has worked in a bank for 40 years, emphasizes the need for open-mindedness and genuine curiosity when getting to know someone different. They advocate for asking thoughtful questions and being aware of body language to foster trust and understanding. The speaker also stresses the importance of being willing to learn and unlearn biases, and the value of embracing diversity in order to grow and learn from others.

Keywords

💡Assumption

Assumption refers to a belief or a statement that is accepted as true without proof or evidence. In the context of the video, it is about the preconceived notions people make about others based on appearance or stereotypes. The script mentions how people often assume the speaker's origin or sexual orientation without knowing them, which highlights the theme of not judging a book by its cover.

💡Stereotype

A stereotype is a widely held but fixed and oversimplified image or idea of a particular type of person or thing. The video discusses how stereotypes can lead to incorrect assumptions, such as mistaking the speaker's wife for a boyfriend or presuming someone's profession based on their age. This keyword is central to the video's message about the importance of overcoming preconceived ideas.

💡Bisexual

Bisexual is a term used to describe a person who is attracted to both men and women. The speaker mentions being bisexual and the misconceptions people have about it, such as asking if they date both genders simultaneously. This term is relevant to the video's theme of challenging assumptions and understanding individuality.

💡Dinosaur

In the video, 'dinosaur' is used metaphorically to describe someone who is perceived as outdated or old-fashioned, like the speaker who has worked for the bank for 40 years. The term illustrates the theme of not making assumptions about people's knowledge or capabilities based on their age or appearance.

💡Shortcuts

Shortcuts in this context refer to the quick judgments or assumptions people make about others without taking the time to understand them fully. The script talks about how people take shortcuts to categorize individuals, which is a key point in the video's message about the need to resist such shortcuts and get to know people on a deeper level.

💡Open-mindedness

Open-mindedness is the ability to consider new ideas or viewpoints without prejudice. The video emphasizes the importance of being open-minded to understand and accept people who are different from oneself. It is a central concept in the video's theme of breaking down barriers and fostering understanding.

💡Body Language

Body language consists of the non-verbal cues, such as facial expressions and gestures, that convey information about a person's feelings or thoughts. The speaker mentions body language as a significant aspect of communication that can reveal the truth about a person, which ties into the video's theme of authentically getting to know someone.

💡Bias

Bias refers to a preference or inclination, especially one that inhibits impartial judgment. The video script talks about letting go of biases as a way to learn about and accept others. This keyword is integral to the video's message of overcoming preconceived notions and being open to new experiences.

💡Fluid

Fluid in the context of the video script refers to the fluidity of identity, particularly in terms of gender and sexuality. It highlights the speaker's point that there is more to a person than binary categories and that society should be open to diverse ways of living and identifying.

💡Social Responsibility

Social responsibility is a concept where individuals or organizations act in a way that benefits society at large. The video script touches on the idea that it is a social responsibility to be sensitive and considerate of people who are different, emphasizing the importance of empathy and understanding in society.

💡Mistakes

Mistakes are errors or faults made unintentionally. The speaker acknowledges that mistakes can happen, such as misidentifying someone's gender, but emphasizes the importance of correcting them and being open to learning. This keyword ties into the video's theme of growth through understanding and accepting one's errors.

Highlights

People often make assumptions about others based on appearance or accent.

Individuals frequently feel the need to correct others' misconceptions about their identity.

Misunderstandings can occur in personal relationships, such as mistaking one's partner's gender.

Prejudices can lead to stereotyping and pigeonholing individuals based on superficial traits.

The speaker has worked for a bank for 40 years and feels underestimated due to their appearance.

Being open-minded and asking questions is advised for getting to know someone different.

Sharing personal experiences can help build trust and understanding between individuals.

Body language is a significant factor in communication and can reveal a lot about a person's truth.

The manner in which questions are asked can impact the response and the interaction.

People should be willing to let go of biases and be open to learning about others.

It's important not to be afraid of making mistakes and to correct oneself when wrong.

There is value in asking questions, even if they might seem basic or ignorant.

The younger generation is more open and fluid in their understanding of identity and culture.

It's a social responsibility to be sensitive and considerate towards people who are different.

Investing time and effort to understand someone can lead to exciting discoveries and learning.

Transcripts

when you look at me some people say oh

you might be from Asia but when you

listen to me I sound like I'm from North

America we have to come out all the time

you're always in a situation where

someone has made an assumption then you

feel like actually you need to set the

record straight

there was this one colleague that kept

referring your wife I said I hope no

it's my boyfriend from face value we can

look quite similar because I'm as fast

and they'll just presume that on fasting

- I'm bisexual people would tend to ask

me whether I see a boy and a girl at the

same time I've worked for the bank for

40 years this August probably perceived

as a little bit of a dinosaur

maybe not seen for all the knowledge

that I've kind of got and the experience

that I can offer those are the kind of

shortcuts that people take to try to put

you in a box and say I've got your

profile now I've got you figured out the

advice I've got for anybody in getting

to know somebody that is different to

them is to be open perhaps think about

questions that you can ask that get to

know the person you can't define me

because of my religion my religion is my

personal belief but Who I am

is something so different to that talk

about yourself first if you want to gain

someone's trust you need to give a bit

of yourself body language is one of the

biggest things that comes across and

people are asking you questions body

language tells a lot the truth yes movie

another thing is the way you ask the

question as well so if you're quite

abrupt in asking oh where are you from

or what is your background it might take

me aback a lot of time people have done

that to remember asked us where we're

from and then left out that as if what

we've said is wrong it's not only about

learning something new it's going with

the mindset that ok I'm willing to let

go of my biases and willing to learn

other word up someone come to me and

talk to me and ask me things opposed to

having your preconceived ideas in your

mind

there isn't just black and white anymore

there isn't just male or female there

are other ways of living there are other

cultures out there and keeping an open

mind and be much more informed about

that is a good starting point not being

afraid of making mistakes is also really

important I've been in situations where

I have mixed up somebody's gender that's

a bit of a challenging situation and you

have to kind of correct yourself or

allow yourself to be corrected no

question is a dumb question

because if you jump if you don't know

you don't know as long as the intention

is good yes as long as you're genuine

and respectful you just ask respectfully

just ask the question answer them the

next generation coming up actually is

even more open and even more fluid and

therefore we have to not hide behind the

excuse of it's something that I don't

understand it's something I'm I'm not

part of it's a social responsibility to

be sensitive and to be considerate to

people who are different from you the

energy and effort to get to know someone

is worth it because there could be

something exciting at the end of it that

that you could learn from and that you

didn't know before that's how you move

forward

[Music]