Life-Changing Advice for Young Men
Summary
TLDRこの動画スクリプトは、若い男性にとって重要な普遍的原則を説明し、男性としての自己形成と社会的役割を定義することを目的としています。男性は自分自身の価値を高め、社会にプラスの存在となるよう努力することが求められます。恋愛、キャリア、自己改善、情熱的な目標追求における自己改善が重要であり、それは長い期間にわたって価値を築くプロセスであることを強調しています。
Takeaways
- 💪 若い男性は社会への貢献を定義することが重要です。
- 📈 男性は自己の価値を築き上げ、社会へのプラスになる存在を目指す必要があります。
- 👥 男性は女性に直接アプローチし、シンプルで尊重深い方法で性的興味を表現する能力を身につけることが大切です。
- 🌟 自己改善は最も重要なデーティングアドバイスです。
- 👫 長期的なパートナーを選ぶことは、人生で最も重要な決定の一つです。
- 🚀 価値は長い期間にわたって徐々に築かれます。
- 📚 教育は終身的なもので、学校を卒業した後も学び続けることが重要です。
- 🧠 メンタルヘルスの問題がある場合は、今すぐ対処することが重要です。
- 🧩 生活は達成の列ではなく、探求の連鎖として捉えることが大切です。
- 💬 自己の感情を認識し、直接的に表現するが、それらに生活を左右されることがないようにしましょう。
- 🌐 世界は常に道徳的な憤りを誘惑に来ます。これらの憤りは空洞であり、受け入れないことが大切です。
- 🔍 自分の心を専門的に学び、自分自身の動機や恐怖、誘惑、および悪習を理解しましょう。
Q & A
若者の男性にとって「価値を世界に定義すること」とは何を意味するのでしょうか?
-「価値を世界に定義すること」とは、男性が社会にプラスの価値を提供することを意味します。これは、歴史的に男性が部族や社会、文明の一部として認められるために、価値を構築しなければならないという強い圧力が常にかけられていたことを指しています。
哲学者Camille Pagliaの言葉「A woman simply is but a man must become.」とはどう解釈されますか?
-この言葉は、女性は単に存在すること自体が価値があるという意味であり、一方で男性は自分自身を通じて価値を構築しなければならないという責任があることを示しています。
男性にとっての自己改善とは何ですか?
-自己改善とは、自分自身の価値を構築し、周囲の人々にその価値を与えることです。これにより、男性は自信や自己評価を高め、人生に意味や目的を与えることができます。
男性が女性にアプローチする際、どのような態度が求められますか?
-男性が女性にアプローチする際には、シンプルで尊重にあう言葉を使用して性的興味を表明する態度が求められます。もし適切な状態であれば、それがどれだけ効果的かを驚くことがあります。
長期的なパートナーを選ぶ際の重要性について説明してください。
-長期的なパートナーを選ぶことは、人生における最も重要な決定の一つです。良いパートナーは他のすべての取り組みを容易にし、楽しくすることができます。一方、悪いパートナーは他の取り組みを不必要に困難で複雑にします。
男性が自己の感情を認識し、表現する方法は何ですか?
-男性は自分の感情を認識し、直接的に表現するようにトレーニングを受けるべきです。感情は提案ではなく命令であり、人生を支配してはいけません。
男性が自己の感情や精神的問題を対処する最善の時期は何ですか?
-現在、もし感情的または精神的健康に関する問題がある場合、今すぐ対処する最善の時期です。将来のパートナーや子供に影響を与える前に、問題を解決するべきです。
男性が自己の欲望や恐怖を理解するために、どのような方法が提案されていますか?
-自己の欲望や恐怖を理解するために、自分自身の心を専門家になる必要があります。自分自身の動機を学び、恐れていることを理解し、何が自分を妨害しているかを知ることが重要です。
男性が自己の生活を改善するために、どのような行動を推奨されていますか?
-男性は自分自身の価値を構築し、それを他人と共有することが推奨されています。また、自己教育を続け、学校で教えられないことを学び、感情や精神的問題を解決することが重要です。
成功を妨げる「道徳的な愤り」とは何ですか?
-「道徳的な愤り」とは、他の男性が自分のプロジェクトを失敗させ、成功が不可能であることを証明しようとする空っぽの憤りです。これらの憤りは空き罐のカロリーであり、これらのナレティブには陥らないようにすることが重要です。
男性が周囲の人々との関係を改善するために、どのようなアドバイスが提供されていますか?
-男性は弱い人たちとのつながいを改善するために、クレームや悪口をやめ、そのような人たちと距離を置くよう訓練する必要があります。自分が選んだ周囲の人々は自分自身の平均を形成するため、周囲の人々を選ぶ際には注意が必要です。
若者が直面している「世界がクソみたい」という感覚に対して、どのような視点が提供されていますか?
-若者は世界がクソみたいに思えることがありますが、実際には史上何時もより多くの自由と機会がある今です。しかし、それを活かす男性が今までより少なくなっています。自分自身を挑戦し、価値を構築し、他者に共有する勇気を持つことが重要です。
Outlines
🚀 成長と自己価値の構築
この段落では、若者にとって重要ないくつかの時代を超える原則が説明されています。男性は社会への貢献を定義する「若者のプロジェクト」を持ち、それを通じて自己価値を構築し、社会にプラスの存在となることが求められます。また、男性は自分自身の価値を高め、周囲に与えることで、恋愛問題を長期間で解決できるとされています。選ぶことの重要性についても触れられており、長期的なパートナーの選択は人生で最も重要な決定の一つであると指摘されています。
🧠 自己理解と情緒管理
この段落では、自己理解と情緒管理の重要性が強調されています。若者は継続的な教育を通じて自己発見と情緒の整理を行い、自己価値を高めるべきです。生活を達成の連続ではなく、探求の連続と捉えることが勧められています。また、自己を高めることと他人への敬意を求めることに関連があることが述べられており、周りの人たちに対して敬意を与えることで、より高い自己評価が得られるとされています。情緒を認識し、それを人生に支配させることがないよう、そして弱い人々とのつながりを避けることも重要視されています。
Mindmap
Keywords
💡self-improvement
💡value
💡confidence
💡long-term partner
💡therapy
💡emotional intelligence
💡patience
💡ego
💡respect
💡emotional management
💡peer influence
Highlights
Weak men seek validation, while strong men focus on self-improvement.
The purpose of a young man is to define his usefulness to the world, unlike women whose value is innate through the potential to create life.
Men face historical pressure to prove their worth to society, as they are seen as expendable.
The 'becoming of a man' is about building value and contributing positively to society.
Confidence and self-esteem stem from a man's ability to add value to society.
Dating advice for men boils down to self-improvement; everything else is a detail or distraction.
Choosing a long-term partner is a critical decision that significantly impacts a man's life.
Patience is key as valuable traits in men compound slowly over time.
Avoid short-term status games; focus on long-term value creation.
Continue education indefinitely, learning skills not taught in school.
Address emotional or mental health issues early to avoid future complications.
Therapy can be beneficial for men, contrary to popular belief.
View life as a series of explorations rather than achievements to keep ego in check.
True value and respect are not demanded but earned through contributions to others.
Emotions should be recognized but not allowed to dictate one's life.
Avoid moral outrage narratives that undermine personal success.
Understanding one's own motivations and vices is crucial for personal growth.
Surround yourself with people who uplift you, as you become the average of those around you.
Despite challenges, today offers more freedom and opportunity than ever; take action and build value.
True success and fulfillment come from a long-term commitment to self-improvement and value compounding.
Transcripts
- Weak men try to convince the world they are not weak.
Strong men try to convince the world of nothing.
There's a lot of terrible advice
for young men on the internet, and I get it.
Being a man in 2024 is (beep) confusing.
So in this video,
I'm going to explain some timeless principles
that are important for any young man to understand.
(bright music)
Let's start with this.
The project of a young man
means defining your usefulness to the world.
A woman's value to society is innate.
She has an inherent potential to create life,
but men we're expendable.
Young men, especially as long as there's one man
somewhere with a working dick,
civilization is going to be fine.
Therefore, throughout history,
there has been an intense pressure on young men
to earn the right to be part of the tribe,
society, or civilization.
As the philosopher Camille Paglia once wrote,
"A woman simply is but a man must become."
The project that Paglia alludes to the becoming of a man
is therefore to build your value
to become a net positive for society.
As men, we have a deep instinctual desire to do this.
It's largely what generates confidence and self-esteem,
and it gives our lives a sense of meaning and purpose.
(upbeat music)
Develop the ability to approach women in person
and state your sexual interest in them
in the simplest and most respectful terms.
Assuming you have your together
and don't look like a basement dwelling troglodyte,
you will absolutely be shocked how far this will get you.
Ultimately, the only good dating advice is self-improvement.
Everything else is either a detail or a distraction.
Build value within yourself,
give that value to those around you,
and most of your dating problems
will take care of themselves over the long run.
Choosing a long-term partner
will be the most important decision you make
at this stage of your life.
I know no one tells you that, but it's true.
A great partner will make every other endeavor
that much easier and more enjoyable.
A bad partner will make every other endeavor
unnecessarily difficult and complicated.
So choose wisely.
And if you're really struggling with women,
then read my men's dating book
"Models: Attract Women Through Honesty."
It sold nearly half a million copies
and even 12 years later, it continues to be
one of the bestselling men's books in the world.
(bright music)
You're probably like most young men
and that you're incredibly impatient.
You wanna prove your status and worth now.
You want the fast car and the fat bank account now.
You wanna bang the hot girl now.
Trust me, my dude, I get it.
Almost all things that are valuable in a man
compound slowly over a long period of time.
Wealth, knowledge, strength, self-awareness,
emotional maturity, family.
These things are not found.
They're slowly built Over the course of years and decades,
there will be many temptations to bypass
the long status game
for a bunch of short-term bullshit status games.
This is the biggest mistake that I made when I was young.
I thought I could shortcut the long-term value game
by winning a bunch of dumb short-term value games,
found in parties, video games, nightclubs, and traveling.
These experiences were a lot of fun, don't get me wrong,
and I did learn some things from them,
but ultimately they probably distracted me
from the bigger and more important goal
of developing myself.
(upbeat music)
If the value of being a man compounds slowly,
then that means the primary project of every young man
should be to continue their education indefinitely.
You do not stop learning when you finish school.
On the contrary, the real useful education has only begun.
Your project then is to learn the things
they didn't teach you in school.
How to relate to people,
how to be dependable and trustworthy,
how to listen well, how to take risks,
how to communicate your thoughts and feelings effectively.
How to stomach rejection, how to manage your emotions,
how to admit when you're wrong.
If you have emotional or mental health issues,
now is the time to deal with them.
Not when you have a girlfriend, not when you're married,
not when you're already fucking up your kids.
Get it taken care of now.
Everyone will thank you for it decades later,
which leads me to the sponsor of this video, Betterhelp.
There's a bit of a meme going around right now
that therapy doesn't work for men.
And as a man who got therapy in his 20s
and benefited greatly from it, that's bullshit.
The key is to find a good therapist,
a therapist who understands what you're going through
and won't condescend to you or ignore your problems.
And this is what's great about Betterhelp.
If you're unhappy with your therapist,
you can switch at any time.
You can take your time,
find someone who's the right fit for you.
When I was 23, I noticed that I seemed to sabotage
every romantic relationship I was in.
So I got therapy and I found a male therapist
who I felt would understand a lot of my sexual insecurities,
and he was great.
He actually helped me immensely.
So as part of your continued education
and your discovery of yourself,
get your emotional together, get some therapy.
Everyone will thank you for it later.
Go to www.betterhelp.com/markmanson
to get 10% off your first month.
Use the link in the description to learn more.
(bright music)
Try not to think of life as a series of achievements,
but rather a series of explorations.
You're not trying to achieve money.
You are simply exploring the means to make money.
You are not trying to achieve sex.
You are simply exploring your sexuality.
You're not trying to achieve six back abs.
You are simply exploring the potential
of your health and fitness.
This allows you to pursue worthy experiences
while not entangling your ego and identity up in them.
Because even the most noteworthy achievements
when laced with ego, will turn you into a selfish asshole.
(upbeat music)
If you have to say you are something,
you are not that thing.
If you have to convince people that you are high value,
then you are not high value.
If you have to make people respect you,
then you are not worthy of respect.
The best way to earn respect from people around you
is to first give it unconditionally.
Took me a long time
to learn that satisfaction and self-respect as a man
will grow in proportion to the value that you bring
to those around you.
Don't make the same mistakes that I did.
(bright music)
Don't be afraid of your emotions.
Learn to recognize your emotions and state them bluntly,
but never let them dictate your life to you.
Emotions are merely a suggestion, not a decree.
Don't make excuses.
Don't blame the world for your shortcomings.
Don't become bitter or resentful
about things that don't affect you at all.
(bright music)
The world will constantly try to seduce you
with moral outrage.
Usually these narratives are sold
by other men whose projects have been derailed,
men who have failed themselves and others,
and are trying to prove to you that success is impossible.
This outrage is empty calories.
Don't buy into these narratives.
(bright music)
Become an expert of your own mind.
Learn what motivates you. Learn what scares you.
Learn what temps you and what vices derail you.
Test and build systems for yourself.
What gets you to exercise in the morning?
What helps you have difficult conversations?
What gets you to stop drinking before you go too far?
What upsets you unnecessarily?
What the ins and outs of your own mind is?
This will affect everything you do.
(upbeat music)
Complaining and talking shit
is how weak people relate to each other.
Train yourself to stop doing both
and stop hanging around people who do both.
You are the average of the five people
you surround yourself with.
So take a long hard look at who you're choosing.
(bright music)
The world may seem like shit.
The world always seems like shit to young people,
but recognize that today
there is more freedom and opportunity
than any other time in history,
yet fewer men are willing to act on it
and take it than ever.
The average young male is undereducated,
underemployed, overweight, broke,
and has never approached a woman in his life.
Just fucking try, my God, just try and your already ahead.
So push yourself, build value, share it with others,
push yourself, build value, share it with others.
Rinse and repeat. Play the long game.
Start compounding value within yourself now,
reap the massive rewards down the line.
Then it's just a matter of being patient.
Compounding takes a long time,
so never interrupt it unnecessarily.
Just remind yourself periodically
that it's only going to get better as you go.
And when you do get there,
it won't be some big celebratory moment.
Nobody's gonna throw you a parade.
No.
Once you get there,
you actually won't even know you're there
until one day you see an old video
or a story or someone reminds you of something
and you kinda laugh to yourself
and say, "Wow, can't believe I used to be that way."
I would say, "I'd congratulate you when you get there."
I will be happy for you.
But once you're there,
you won't need any fucking congratulations.
You'll be fulfilled all on your own.
Instead, I'll just do you a favor by ending this video.
After all, you've got a lot of work to do,
so it's time to get started.
(upbeat music)
5.0 / 5 (0 votes)