NO CONTACT: Why it's POWERFUL and How to Do It Better

Danny Vera
27 Jul 202308:48

Summary

TLDRThe video script discusses the concept of 'no contact' as a powerful tool for self-respect and emotional clarity after a breakup or disrespectful treatment. It explains that women often struggle with rejection, and no contact can build attraction by demonstrating strength and self-worth. The script advises removing all reminders of the person, dating others to broaden perspective, and maintaining a mindset of self-improvement rather than seeking a reunion. It emphasizes that no contact should be approached with an abundance mindset, focusing on personal growth and moving on to healthier relationships.

Takeaways

  • πŸ“΅ The concept of 'No Contact' is about cutting off all communication with someone to establish boundaries and preserve dignity in the face of disrespect or a toxic relationship.
  • 🚫 The primary aim of no contact is not to manipulate but to show that one will not tolerate bad treatment and to remove oneself from a non-beneficial situation.
  • πŸ’” Women often do not handle rejection well, and this can lead to a range of reactions from shock to ego overload, which can be leveraged to gain the upper hand in a breakup scenario.
  • 🧲 No contact can build attraction by demonstrating strength and self-respect, qualities that are universally appealing and can make one stand out as different.
  • πŸ€” Women's imagination can run wild during no contact, leading to internal discomfort and a sense of loss, which can increase their desire for the person who initiated the no contact.
  • πŸ•΅οΈβ€β™€οΈ Many women take pride in being able to figure out what a guy is up to, and no contact can pique their curiosity, further increasing their interest.
  • πŸ”— The effectiveness of no contact is enhanced if there was an emotional connection, as the absence can create a noticeable gap in the woman's life.
  • πŸ’‘ No contact shows that one can do better and is not afraid to walk away, which is a display of self-worth that can be difficult for the other person to handle.
  • πŸ’Š Detoxing from a person by going no contact can help break the chemical attachment and desire for them, leading to clarity and a healthier mindset.
  • πŸ“¦ To effectively practice no contact, one should remove all signs of the person from their life, including gifts and digital traces, to prevent triggering emotional responses.
  • πŸ‘« Engaging with other people during no contact can help demonstrate that one is moving on and is not fixated on a single individual, which can be empowering.

Q & A

  • What is the concept of 'No Contact' mentioned in the script?

    -The concept of 'No Contact' refers to cutting off all communication with a woman after a breakup or when she is acting disrespectfully or flakily. It is a boundary-setting strategy to show that one will not tolerate bad treatment and to preserve personal dignity.

  • Why is 'No Contact' considered beneficial in moving on from a breakup?

    -'It No Contact' is beneficial because it helps establish respect by not tolerating bad treatment and preserves one's dignity by removing oneself from a non-beneficial situation. It also helps in breaking the attachment and desire for the other person, providing clarity and an abundance mindset.

  • How does the script suggest women typically react to rejection?

    -The script suggests that women do not handle rejection well, often experiencing a shock to their ego and, in some cases, exhibiting frantic or crazy behavior due to the unexpected nature of the rejection.

  • What does the script imply about the human brain's reaction to the absence of a person?

    -The script implies that the human brain tends to imagine the worst when a person is absent, especially if there is an emotional connection. This can lead to feelings of wanting to reconnect or to know what the absent person is doing.

  • Why might a woman feel a 'gap' in her life after a man implements 'No Contact'?

    -A woman might feel a 'gap' if there was an emotional connection and the man added value to her life. The absence of his presence can be uncomfortable, leading to an increased desire for him to return.

  • How does 'No Contact' demonstrate a man's self-worth and strength?

    -'No Contact' demonstrates self-worth and strength by showing that a man is not afraid to walk away from a situation where he is not valued or respected. It communicates a lack of fear and a trust in oneself to find something better.

  • What is the role of neuroticism in the way women react to 'No Contact'?

    -Neuroticism, a personality trait that tends to be more prevalent in women, can lead to increased negative feelings like anxiety and self-doubt. When a woman is left in the dark about a man's activities during 'No Contact', her neuroticism may cause her to imagine the worst and feel a stronger desire to reconnect.

  • What are some practical steps to effectively implement 'No Contact'?

    -To effectively implement 'No Contact', one should remove all signs of the other person from their life, avoid looking at social media or photos, and not read old messages. Additionally, dating other people can help the brain realize that there are other options available.

  • Why is it important to approach 'No Contact' from an abundance mindset rather than a scarcity mindset?

    -Approaching 'No Contact' from an abundance mindset is important because it focuses on personal growth and moving on, rather than hoping for the other person to return. This mindset is healthier and more empowering, as it is about self-improvement and not dependent on the other person's actions.

  • What is the potential downside of trying to get an ex back after implementing 'No Contact'?

    -The potential downside is that if the relationship ended for a reason, it is likely that the same issues will resurface. The script suggests that taking girls back often leads to regret, as the initial reasons for the breakup are usually valid and unresolved.

Outlines

00:00

🚫 The Power of No Contact in Relationships

The first paragraph introduces the concept of no contact, emphasizing its importance in post-breakup scenarios or when dealing with disrespect from a woman. The speaker explains that no contact is not about manipulation but about establishing boundaries and self-respect by removing oneself from harmful situations. It highlights women's typical reaction to rejection, which can be intense due to their accustomed attention from men. The paragraph also discusses how no contact can build attraction by showcasing strength and self-worth, and how it can provoke a woman's imagination and internal discomfort, potentially leading to a renewed interest in the man who has cut off contact.

05:01

πŸ’‘ No Contact: Strengthening Mindset and Moving On

The second paragraph delves into the psychological effects of no contact, both on the individual implementing it and on the woman involved. It discusses the importance of completely removing reminders of the woman from one's life to facilitate the detoxing process from the emotional attachment. The speaker stresses the value of dating other women during this period, not necessarily for romantic reasons but to demonstrate to oneself that there are other potential partners. The paragraph concludes with advice against using no contact with the intention of getting the woman back, advocating instead for a mindset of self-improvement and moving on to better things, regardless of her response.

Mindmap

Keywords

πŸ’‘No Contact

No Contact is a strategy where an individual cuts off all communication with someone, often after a breakup or in response to disrespectful behavior. In the video's context, it is used to establish respect and preserve dignity by removing oneself from a non-beneficial or exploitative situation. The script explains that women may not handle this well due to the shock to their ego, which can lead to a range of reactions from frantic behavior to internal discomfort.

πŸ’‘Rejection

Rejection is the act of being dismissed or not accepted, which can cause emotional distress. The video discusses how women, in particular, may not handle rejection well, often leading to a strong internal reaction. It is used as a point to illustrate the power of No Contact, suggesting that the discomfort caused by rejection can create a sense of loss and increase attraction.

πŸ’‘Attraction

Attraction in the video refers to the desire or interest one person feels towards another, which can be influenced by various factors such as strength, boundaries, and self-respect. The script suggests that by implementing No Contact and demonstrating strength and self-respect, an individual can become more attractive to others, including women who may begin to feel a sense of loss or curiosity about the person who has distanced themselves.

πŸ’‘Neuroticism

Neuroticism is a personality trait characterized by a tendency to experience negative emotions such as anxiety and self-doubt. The script mentions that women, on average, may have higher levels of neuroticism, which can intensify their reactions to No Contact, leading them to imagine the worst or feel a heightened sense of loss when someone is no longer present in their lives.

πŸ’‘Self-Worth

Self-worth is the value or esteem that a person holds for themselves. The video emphasizes the importance of recognizing and demonstrating one's self-worth through actions like No Contact. It suggests that walking away from a situation that does not respect or value an individual is a powerful display of self-worth that can be attractive to others.

πŸ’‘Scarcity Mindset

A scarcity mindset is a belief that resources, including relationships, are limited and must be aggressively pursued or guarded. The script warns against using No Contact from a scarcity mindset, meaning one should not cut off contact in the hope of attracting someone back out of fear of losing them. Instead, No Contact should be used as a means of self-improvement and moving on.

πŸ’‘Chemical Reaction

In the context of the video, a chemical reaction refers to the biological processes in the brain that create feelings of love, desire, and attraction towards another person. The script explains that by going No Contact, one can 'detox' from these feelings and break the attachment to the person, leading to clarity and a healthier mindset.

πŸ’‘Dignity

Dignity is the state of being worthy of respect or esteem. The video discusses the importance of preserving one's dignity by removing oneself from situations where they are disrespected or not treated well. No Contact is presented as a way to assert boundaries and demonstrate that one will not tolerate poor treatment.

πŸ’‘Emotional Connection

An emotional connection is a bond formed between individuals based on shared feelings and experiences. The script mentions that the effectiveness of No Contact can depend on the level of emotional connection with the person being distanced. A stronger emotional connection can lead to a more significant sense of loss and desire for reconnection.

πŸ’‘Moving On

Moving on refers to the process of overcoming past relationships or situations and progressing towards new experiences or relationships. The video suggests that moving on is a crucial part of the No Contact strategy, as it allows an individual to focus on their own growth and happiness rather than being fixated on the past.

Highlights

The concept of no contact is introduced as a strategy to cut off all communication with a woman after a breakup or when disrespected.

No contact aims to establish respect and preserve dignity by setting boundaries and removing oneself from unbeneficial situations.

Women's reaction to rejection is discussed, noting that some may react very strongly due to being unaccustomed to not being desired.

The idea that no contact can build attraction by demonstrating strength and having boundaries is presented.

The human brain's tendency to imagine the worst when out of sight, leading to increased curiosity and desire, is highlighted.

Neuroticism is mentioned as a personality trait that can amplify the discomfort of rejection, especially in women.

The strategy of moving on as a counterintuitive way to attract a girl back is discussed.

The importance of having an emotional connection for no contact to be effective in creating a gap in the woman's life is noted.

No contact is described as a display of power and self-worth, showing that one can do better and is not afraid to walk away.

A quote from 'The Art of Seduction' is used to illustrate the unbearable feeling of being less desirable than a rival.

The benefits of no contact for mental strength and breaking the chemical attachment to a woman are explained.

Practical steps for effective no contact are outlined, including removing all signs of the woman from one's life.

Dating other women during no contact is suggested to demonstrate to oneself that other options exist.

The importance of adopting a no contact mindset that is not based on scarcity but on self-improvement is emphasized.

The transcript concludes with advice to focus on oneself and to use no contact as a powerful tool for moving on from a bad situation.

Transcripts

play00:00

let's talk about the power of no contact

play00:02

and why it's crucial for you to use in

play00:04

situations where you are getting over a

play00:05

breakup thinking about a girl non-stop

play00:08

wanting a girl back or you've been

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disrespected by a woman keep in mind

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that a lot of what I'm going to talk

play00:12

about in this video actually applies to

play00:13

dealing with people in general but I'm

play00:15

going to mainly focus on using no

play00:17

contact in the context of dealing with a

play00:19

woman before I start if you aren't

play00:21

familiar with the concept of no contact

play00:22

it is the idea that you cut off all

play00:24

communication with a woman after a

play00:26

breakup or in cases where a woman is

play00:28

acting flaky or disrespecting you the

play00:29

aim of no contact isn't to be

play00:31

manipulative or Petty but to establish

play00:33

Respect by having a boundary that shows

play00:35

you will not tolerate bad treatment and

play00:37

to preserve your dignity as a man by

play00:39

removing yourself from a situation that

play00:41

is no longer beneficial to you or a

play00:43

situation where you're being taken

play00:44

advantage of now one of the biggest

play00:45

reasons no contact works so well is that

play00:47

women do not handle rejection well at

play00:50

all in fact in my experience some women

play00:51

will get very crazy when they're

play00:53

rejected and the reason for this is

play00:54

because they're used to men Desiring

play00:56

them and throwing themselves at their

play00:57

feet when they run into a guy who

play00:59

doesn't play like that it's a shock to

play01:01

their ego it's a complete ego overload

play01:03

in some cases and that's where you get

play01:04

some of that frantic crazy behavior as

play01:06

their mind is just trying to cope with

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it it's actually funny in a way because

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it's like a narcissistic seizure or

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something like think about how often

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guys have to deal with rejection and how

play01:15

we are supposed to just take it on the

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chin but a girl will flip out if she's

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rejected but anyway not all women will

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go crazy on you because some have a good

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poker face but all of them will feel the

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internal discomfort of rejection on some

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level when you pull your contact with

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them this can also build attraction

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because it shows that you're different

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and that you're a guy with boundaries

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and humans in general are attracted to

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strength and especially women no one is

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attracted to a doormat who sticks around

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just getting beat up and women know when

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they're acting goofy or treating you

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badly so this is Amplified even more

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women respect a guy who respects himself

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and I can tell you from talking to women

play01:47

firsthand that they absolutely hate men

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who are pushovers so by removing

play01:52

yourself from the situation you are

play01:53

showing her that you don't need her

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which is a display of strength that is

play01:57

attractive pair that with their mindset

play01:59

that isn't handling rejection well and

play02:01

you have gained the upper hand just by

play02:02

simply cutting off contact with her to

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expand on this a little more another

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reason why women don't handle rejection

play02:07

well is because their imagination just

play02:09

runs wild when you are gone from her

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life and out of sight you could be doing

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anything and that means you could be

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partying with Dan Bilzerian on a yacht

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with 20 models or drooling on the couch

play02:19

watching bowling on TV but the human

play02:21

brain is really good at lying to us and

play02:23

will usually think the worst which is

play02:25

why one of my personal mantras is that

play02:26

your brain is lying this is enhanced in

play02:28

women even more because most women have

play02:30

a higher level of neuroticism than a man

play02:32

does and if you aren't familiar with the

play02:34

word neuroticism it basically means

play02:35

someone who leans toward negative

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feelings like anxiety and self-doubt

play02:39

it's a personality trait that all of us

play02:41

have but it's on a sliding scale meaning

play02:43

that some people have more of it than

play02:44

others in my experience women tend to

play02:46

have higher levels of neuroticism than

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men they tend to worry about the details

play02:50

of things more and what could go wrong

play02:51

in a scenario Etc because of this when

play02:53

they don't know what you're doing and

play02:55

you've suddenly vanished from their life

play02:56

they tend to think the worst and assume

play02:58

you're just outliving it up again this

play03:00

could be the furthest thing from the

play03:01

truth but the Mind plays tricks on us

play03:03

and with a girl on the other side of no

play03:05

contact it increases feelings of wanting

play03:07

to see what you're doing or wanting to

play03:09

talk to you and girls are very curious

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many girls in my experience actually

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Pride themselves on being detectives and

play03:14

able to sniff out drama or find out what

play03:16

a guy is up to that's why the best

play03:18

strategy for wanting to get a girl back

play03:19

is to Simply move on it sounds

play03:21

counterintuitive but many guys would

play03:23

benefit from moving on in order to

play03:25

attract a girl back and honestly I don't

play03:27

even recommend trying to get girls back

play03:28

because if they're gone it was for a

play03:30

reason and you'll usually ReDiscover

play03:32

that reason later but it is something

play03:34

worth mentioning because I see guys ask

play03:36

how to get girls back all the time but

play03:38

the other reason why no contact is

play03:40

effective at getting a grow back is

play03:42

because when you leave there's a gap

play03:43

where your presence once was now keep in

play03:46

mind that this idea is dependent on

play03:48

having an emotional connection with that

play03:49

girl on some level if this is a girl

play03:51

that you went on a date with one time

play03:53

she's not gonna feel that Gap when

play03:54

you're gone because there wasn't enough

play03:56

of an emotional attachment built there

play03:58

just wasn't enough time invest for her

play04:00

to care about you being gone but coming

play04:02

out of a relationship or a scenario

play04:04

where you've been dating a girl

play04:05

consistently for at least a few months

play04:06

she's gonna feel a gap in her life when

play04:09

your presence is gone and this could be

play04:11

really uncomfortable for a girl to deal

play04:12

with if you were a guy that added value

play04:14

to her life it's like missing a piece of

play04:16

her life and it increases her desire for

play04:17

you again this is based on the idea that

play04:19

you were a guy that added some kind of

play04:21

value to her life if you were a dude

play04:22

that was just more problematic than you

play04:24

were beneficial then this is less likely

play04:26

to be effective unless the woman has a

play04:28

more traumatic attachment style and if

play04:30

she does I wouldn't even recommend being

play04:32

around her anyway just get away from

play04:33

those girls you'll be happy that you did

play04:35

later another reason why no contact is

play04:37

so powerful is that it shows that you

play04:38

can do better and this is tough for a

play04:40

lot of women to deal with on an ego

play04:42

level a man who is strong enough to walk

play04:44

away and know his value is the guy that

play04:46

both men and women respect there's

play04:48

simply no bigger Display of Power and

play04:50

self-worth than walking away it shows a

play04:52

lack of fear and a bold trust in

play04:54

yourself to find something better and

play04:56

this is felt on an energy level by the

play04:57

girl and you will often find girls

play04:59

chasing you down down just off this

play05:00

alone there's a quote I like from a

play05:02

great book called The Art of Seduction

play05:04

which states that we can endure feeling

play05:06

that another person has more Talent or

play05:08

more money but the sense that a rival is

play05:11

more desirable than we are that is

play05:13

unbearable and I love this quote to

play05:15

describe this concept because the human

play05:17

ego is very fragile and weak in many

play05:19

ways and when a girl senses that another

play05:20

girl may be more desirable than her it

play05:23

can drive her crazy and it's not a good

play05:25

feeling for anyone male or female to

play05:26

feel like they are being left behind for

play05:28

something better and that's exactly what

play05:30

no contact communicates now honestly

play05:32

aside from all that the biggest benefits

play05:33

and no contact is the effects that it

play05:35

has on strengthening your mind to not

play05:37

care about this girl as much attraction

play05:39

and love and desire for a woman is

play05:41

largely a chemical reaction in our brain

play05:42

and it's like a drug the more hits we

play05:44

take of it the more we want and it's

play05:46

hard to get enough and it also drives us

play05:48

crazy for a while when it's gone so if

play05:50

you reverse engineer this idea you'll

play05:51

realize that you can eventually break

play05:53

the attachment and desire for her by

play05:55

detoxing her completely from your life

play05:57

and going no contact the longer you stay

play05:59

away from her by using no contact the

play06:00

more you will gain Clarity on what she's

play06:02

actually like you will lose a lot of the

play06:04

delusions that you used to have about

play06:05

her and you will stop thinking about her

play06:07

being such a Heavenly blessed angel you

play06:09

will realize that she is simply another

play06:11

woman in a sea of many and this is huge

play06:13

for getting over a girl and gaining more

play06:15

of an abundance mindset but there's a

play06:17

few things that you need to do if you

play06:18

want to do no contact effectively and

play06:20

gain those mindset benefits because a

play06:22

lot of guys mess this up the first one

play06:23

is that when you do no contact you want

play06:25

to not only avoid talking to her but

play06:27

remove all signs of her from your life

play06:29

put all of her gifts that she gave you

play06:31

in a box and either throw them away or

play06:33

have someone hold on to them for you

play06:34

until later down the road when you're in

play06:36

a stronger state of mind and make sure

play06:37

that you don't look at any of her social

play06:39

media or any photos of her seriously

play06:41

like nothing at all not even one photo

play06:43

and don't read old text messages she

play06:45

needs to be completely dead to you in

play06:46

your mind these things may sound small

play06:48

but they all trigger emotional responses

play06:50

in your brain and chemical reactions

play06:51

that increase feelings of missing her

play06:53

wanting her Etc you have to remove all

play06:55

signs of this woman existing in your

play06:57

life in order to do this right and the

play06:58

more you stick to it the faster you'll

play07:00

get over her to increase this even

play07:02

faster the second thing is to date other

play07:04

women as quickly as possible now when

play07:06

I've said this to both guys and girls in

play07:08

the past I've had people say they aren't

play07:09

ready to sleep with other girls yet or

play07:11

they don't desire to and that's fine

play07:12

honestly the point is to just get around

play07:14

other women to show your brain that

play07:16

other women exist outside of this one

play07:19

girl just going on a date and talking to

play07:21

a girl can have huge benefits for your

play07:22

mind and I can't stress this one enough

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you have to do this during no contact to

play07:27

make it even more effective the last one

play07:28

is to make sure you aren't using no

play07:30

contact from a scarcity mindset you

play07:32

don't want to do no contact with the

play07:33

hopes of attracting the girl back you

play07:35

want to do no contact because it's best

play07:37

for you to move on and if she comes back

play07:39

cool if she doesn't who cares this is

play07:42

really really important because people

play07:43

feel the energy you give off and the

play07:45

stance that you're operating from even

play07:47

if they're far away if you are operating

play07:49

out of this place of scarcity and hoping

play07:51

a girl comes back by not talking to her

play07:52

she's going to feel that on some level

play07:54

and either not come back or if she does

play07:57

you're gonna fumble the bag immediately

play07:59

once she senses your are actually

play08:00

insecure and guys honestly stop wanting

play08:03

girls to come back there's a reason

play08:05

they're gone you will almost always

play08:07

regret it when they come back anytime

play08:09

I've taken girls back I've always

play08:10

regretted it later I should have just

play08:12

always stuck to getting rid of them the

play08:13

first time it was never worth bringing

play08:15

them back you have to get your mind

play08:17

right to use no contact in order to move

play08:19

on to better things and to remove

play08:21

yourself from a bad situation where this

play08:23

girl wasn't good for you or you've been

play08:25

used for attention or disrespected in

play08:27

some way remember this is about you not

play08:29

her and when it's all about you no

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contact is one of the most powerful

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things that you can use anyway let me

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know if you guys got any questions or if

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there's any videos that you want to see

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specifically leave your suggestions down

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in the comments below also make sure to

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check the links down in the description

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below to check out some of the things I

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have to offer make sure you watch this

play08:45

video next and I will see you in

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Related Tags
No ContactSelf-RespectAttractionRejectionBoundariesEmotional HealingRelationship AdvicePersonal GrowthSocial DynamicsMental Strength