How to get her to think about you nonstop
Summary
TLDRThe video transcript discusses dating strategies and the complexities of attracting a partner. It features a debate over the advice given by a popular YouTuber, who suggests that men should not validate women's egos but rather challenge them, a concept likened to hunting a gazelle by learning from a lion. The conversation explores the role of social media in shaping self-esteem and attractiveness, the potential pitfalls of playing 'mind games' in dating, and the importance of straightforward communication. The participants express differing opinions on the effectiveness of these tactics, with some advocating for genuine interest and respect over manipulative approaches.
Takeaways
- 😀 The video script discusses the idea that to understand how to attract someone, one should seek advice from those who are successful in that area, not the object of desire itself.
- 🤔 The phrase 'if you want to learn how to catch a gazelle, don't ask a gazelle, ask a lion' is mentioned, suggesting that one should learn from the successful pursuer, not the pursued.
- 🧐 The script implies that societal norms and social media influence perceptions of attractiveness and self-worth, particularly for women.
- 🚫 It is suggested that men should not 'destroy' a woman's ego to attract her, but rather show genuine interest and kindness.
- 💬 The discussion points out that both men and women can play games in dating, and that it's not exclusive to one gender.
- 🤷♂️ The script questions the validity of certain dating advice, particularly from those who may have been hurt in the past and are projecting their experiences onto others.
- 👥 It mentions that women have more options in dating due to societal perceptions and that this can lead to inflated self-worth.
- 👍 The importance of being a gentleman and showing kindness stands out as a way to attract a partner, as it is less common in today's society.
- 🙅♀️ The script criticizes the idea of 'pullback methods' and playing games in dating, as it can lead to emotional distress and a lack of trust.
- 🤗 It emphasizes that genuine interest, investment, and communication are more effective in building a relationship than manipulation or ego stroking.
- 🤔 The conversation suggests that understanding and respecting individual differences in dating is crucial, as there is no one-size-fits-all approach to attracting a partner.
Q & A
What is the main theme of the video transcript?
-The main theme of the video transcript revolves around the concept of dating dynamics, particularly focusing on the idea that men should not seek advice from women on how to attract women, but rather learn from those who are successful in attracting them.
What does the phrase 'If you want to learn how to catch a gazelle, don't ask a gazelle, ask a lion' imply in the context of the video?
-The phrase suggests that one should seek advice from those who are successful in a particular area rather than those who are the subject of the area. In the context of dating, it implies that men should learn from men who are successful with women, not from the women themselves.
What does the speaker believe about women's options in the dating market?
-The speaker believes that women have more options in the dating market than men do, which can lead to a sense of entitlement and higher expectations in terms of the partners they choose.
What is the speaker's opinion on the idea of 'destroying a woman's ego' to attract her?
-The speaker disagrees with the idea of 'destroying a woman's ego' as a method to attract her. They believe that it's not about bringing someone down, but rather about showing genuine interest and being a good person.
How does the speaker view the role of social media in shaping women's self-esteem and dating expectations?
-The speaker acknowledges that social media plays a significant role in shaping women's self-esteem and dating expectations, as it often leads to an inflated sense of self-worth based on likes and attention from others.
What does the speaker think about the advice given by popular YouTubers on dating strategies?
-The speaker is critical of the advice given by some YouTubers, suggesting that it may be based on personal experiences or biases rather than universally applicable strategies, and may not always be in the best interest of building healthy relationships.
What is the speaker's stance on the idea that 'nice guys finish last'?
-The speaker believes that being a nice guy does not necessarily mean one will finish last in dating. It depends on the individual and the context, suggesting that kindness and genuine connection are important.
What advice does the speaker give regarding not telling a girl who she can and cannot talk to during the dating stage?
-The speaker advises against controlling who a girl can talk to during the dating stage, emphasizing that she is not yet exclusive to anyone and has the freedom to interact with others.
How does the speaker view the concept of playing mind games in dating?
-The speaker views playing mind games in dating as unnecessary and potentially harmful, advocating for straightforward communication and genuine interest instead.
What does the speaker believe is the best approach for a man to attract a woman?
-The speaker believes that the best approach for a man to attract a woman is to be kind, genuine, and a gentleman, as these qualities stand out and are less common in today's society.
What is the speaker's opinion on the effectiveness of the advice given in popular dating videos?
-The speaker questions the effectiveness of the advice given in popular dating videos, suggesting that it may not resonate with everyone and may be based on the creators' personal experiences rather than proven strategies.
Outlines
🤔 Philosophical Dating Advice
The first paragraph discusses a popular YouTuber's perspective on dating, suggesting that men should not seek advice from women on how to attract them, likening it to asking a gazelle about hunting tactics. The speaker questions the idea of 'destroying her ego' to attract a woman, pointing out societal norms that may give women more perceived dating options. The discussion also touches on the impact of social media on self-esteem and the superficiality of validation through likes and comments. The speaker advocates for genuine interest and respect over manipulative tactics.
💬 The Art of Complimenting Without Feeding Ego
The second paragraph delves into the art of complimenting and showing interest in someone without inflating their ego. It explores the idea that men and women both seek validation through physical appearance on platforms like Instagram. The conversation highlights the importance of being genuine and not overly flattering. It also addresses the broader topic of how to attract a partner, suggesting that being kind and a gentleman stands out in today's society. The paragraph criticizes manipulative dating strategies, such as the 'pullback method,' and emphasizes the need for straightforward communication.
🚫 Avoiding Common Dating Mistakes
In the third paragraph, the focus shifts to common dating mistakes men should avoid, such as trying to control who a woman talks to or assuming she is exclusive to them during the dating phase. It emphasizes the importance of understanding that women, like men, will talk to multiple people and that this doesn't necessarily reflect on their interest in a potential partner. The paragraph critiques the idea of playing mind games and suggests that maturity and genuine interest are more attractive than manipulative tactics. It concludes with the notion that asking a girl directly about what they look for in a partner can provide more authentic dating advice than following the advice of those who have been hurt by relationships.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Gazelle
💡Ego
💡Validation
💡Sexual Market Value
💡Insecurity
💡Compliment
💡Mental Game
💡Entitlement
💡Nice Guys
💡Manipulation
Highlights
If guys really want to know how to get a girl, they should ask a girl.
The concept of asking a lion how to catch a gazelle instead of asking a gazelle is discussed.
A woman is always going to have more options than men in today's society.
A woman's self-entitlement on the sexual market value scale is explored.
Destroying a woman's ego is suggested as a tactic.
The disagreement on the idea of destroying someone's ego as a strategy.
Discussion about whether men or women get their egos stroked more.
The effect of Instagram likes and validation on women's self-esteem.
The concept of using non-sexual attention to validate women.
Different perspectives on how to show interest without destroying someone's ego.
The idea that playing hard to get might make someone more interested.
Debate on whether nice guys finish last or can win in dating.
The rule that men should not tell women who they can or can't talk to while dating.
Discussion on whether women talk to multiple men during the dating stage.
The idea that dating is made too complicated with too many rules.
Whether being mysterious and giving short answers can make a woman more interested.
Discussion on whether playing games and creating emotional roller coasters is effective in dating.
The importance of being kind and a gentleman as a strategy for attracting women.
Different approaches to getting a girl's attention and making her chase you.
The impact of social media and public image on dating and attraction.
The idea that men and women both play games in dating.
How a guy treating a woman differently from others might make her more interested.
The concept of 'ghosting' and its effects on women.
The effectiveness of creating a sense of mystery and desire.
The idea that maturity and straightforwardness are more attractive than playing games.
The importance of being invested and showing interest in dating.
Comparison of dating advice from hurt or insecure men versus directly asking women.
Transcripts
i think if guys really want to know the
answer to why
or to how to get a girl or whatever ask
a girl
what do you think about the concept of
if you want to learn how to catch a
gazelle
don't ask a gazelle ask a lion do you
what do you think about that phrase
so this is my one of my favorite
youtubers steph is cole super funny i
think he says a lot of real stuff
you know some of his stuff everyone
might not agree with it he's not the
end-all be-all
word i wish to follow but i would be
curious to see what you guys think of
this so
so this is what we're going to talk
about today you have to
destroy her ego
[Music]
you know in this society that we live in
today one thing you got to understand
is a woman is always going to have way
more options than you it's going to have
a thousand
a billion more options to you because a
five
or four on the sexual market value
scale is entitled in her brain
that she deserves a 9 or a 10. i just
think that
honestly it's guys who are insecure or
whose ego's been
messed with a little bit by a girl who
say this type of stuff
just saying so what did you disagree
with that he said
i think the fact that saying that girls
deserve this and that what girl wants to
say yeah
i'm gonna go for a guy who's a four when
someone's genuinely a good
guy i know that sounds really cheesy but
that brings them up a lot higher i don't
think anyone should destroy anyone's ego
i think obviously he's been hurt by some
girl and is
getting better do you think it's fair to
say that women get their ego stroked a
lot
i don't it just it depends i think men's
ego gets struck a lot as well
you think men get their ego stroked as
much as women
depends on what you're talking about
appearance instagram okay appearance but
girls are that that's that's how it is
though it depends on what field you're
talking about there's a deep diverse
inside of her soul because when she
posts a picture and her cleavage is
showing
even if she's out of shape and she's fat
she's still going to get over 300 likes
quick question because a girl is a
certain weight does that mean that she
shouldn't be getting that amount of
likes
is there a definition of beauty well
that's true
i think uh a lot of people do like women
who are
not overweight but there's plenty of
people who do like overweight people
he's saying
even if they are overweight doesn't
matter they're still getting a lot of
juice
what's funny is that it's usually the
men that are liking this and it's a man
that is making this video so
how is his point valid he's saying he
doesn't he doesn't believe
in validating the women the same way a
lot of other men do
you get a little ego boost you know what
i'm saying
she's entitled to that type of guy
because she doesn't get just one of
those guys she gets 10 of those guys a
day
you know dm's are in our likes and if
the guy's liking the picture nine times
out of ten he won't hit that
like in a woman's picture is validation
is ego esteem boost telling the woman oh
my
that is her you letting her know that
use me for my non-sexual attention
please you have to never validate her
or validate her little to none like he's
kind of like assuming
yeah or like he just got hurt in some
type of way yeah like one girl
and he's like targeting her like every
girl and this is
opposed to guys who are trying to get
girls this isn't
video for girls obviously it's for guys
who are trying to get i guess more girls
or just have a better
relationship or trying to get women as i
think is the whole point of these do you
think that's not the right way to go
about it is destroying her ego
no no so what is the right way well tell
me another way that you would
show interest in someone that while
you're destroying their ego
while you're bringing them down how can
you make them feel good um i think the
whole
name of the game is what he's saying is
these girls constantly get their ego
boosted with instagram and all these
attractive guys dm in them and liking
their pictures and it makes them
makes these girls feel i'm beautiful i'm
pretty yeah this is the type of guy i
need i need some big ballers
so then when i come and say y'all y'all
you're not special
it makes the girl go yes i am and it
makes them the girl
want to prove themselves to the guy or
the girl because he's not treating me
like every other guy treats me i need to
win him over i like this guy now yeah i
know me personally if a guy is gonna
bring me down
i don't feel more fire to impress him
and that goes both ways i don't think
girls should do that either so you think
even if you're not like that do you
think other girls are
i think that doesn't matter i think
obviously in this day and age
social media and your public image is
a much more of a thing whether you like
it or not um but people have the choice
to put themselves out there and do what
they want to do
i don't think the way to go about it is
to bring someone down just because
otherwise i'm bringing down just because
other men like the look of this girl
i think it just shows that this is a
beautiful woman and you might need to
find more ways other than just
speaking certain words to compliment her
to win her over
and not bring her down just not
complimenting her not feeding into the
compliment train so i guess i think i
you can still show interest as a guy and
say good things about a girl without i
guess being overly overly complimented
do you think that's fair
or what is the best way to for a guy
who's struggling with
trying to find girls or trying to get
with a girl whatever what's the best way
to
win over a girl do you think that
there's a advice that guys should take
like this is how you get a female's
attention this is how you want to get a
female to chase you
kind of along with the question i can
repeat it if you need me too
i think guys tend to lust after girls a
lot for how they look and i think that's
just honestly part of
the science of humans that's i mean
if you look in animals like certain
animals will look a certain way put
themselves out a certain way to look
healthy
to look like this certain thing to
attract people so
i think that's what everyone naturally
wants is to look
healthy to look clean whatever to
attract
certain people i'm not saying that
everyone has to but i don't think that's
an
abnormal thing or something that
shouldn't be happening and also i feel
like
a lot of girls feel confident on
instagram but
like they could be the most insecure
girl how how do guys in today's
society get a girl to chase them that's
a very broad question
i mean girls are different i guess set
themselves up to be for me i think it's
just being kind and being a gentleman
because that's not very common nowadays
yeah that's what stands out to me but
yeah girls are different i think that's
cool so this one is called
why nice guys don't win and i think this
is brushes on
what you were talking about do you guys
think nice guys win no we're the same
and
oh nice guys finished last do you think
so
um depends on the girl and yeah where
they're at in life
yeah sure would a nice guy win with you
guys yes
never ever do these things while you're
in the dating stairs with a female we'll
give you three things you should never
you must be very educated because a lot
of guys don't get it
a lot of guys that don't hunt it's steph
is cold who is he he's
so the first thing the very first thing
right never
ever tell her who she can
and can't talk to when you guys are
dating
world number one she's not yours that's
not your girl that's not your wife you
are not exclusive
okay rule number two she's not going to
stop
talking to other guys when you guys are
dating because that's what she's
supposed to do
she's supposed to talk to other guys
she's supposed to entertain other guys
not in front of your face not being
disrespectful in front of you but
overall
fellas she is going to talk to other
guys so this is in the uh
talking and talking like aren't guys
also
entertaining other girls too well we're
talking this is specifically talking
about
girls entertaining so is that true that
girls entertain
a whole plethora of guys during a
talking stage if you're talking about i
mean you can't
girls are all different you can't you
can't really do that i think
are they able to if you guys are not
held down and
you're just hanging out do y'all tend to
talk to multiple people at once until
you kind of have one that you like
solidify or
no it's too much work for me yeah you're
never the only guy that she's talking to
in the dating stage but what do women do
remember to play mind games with you to
make it seem like you're the only one
and when you feel like you're only one
your ego is being stroked
that's all it is it's the ego stroking
tactic that you cannot let her get to
you
mentally game is all mental it's not
physicality if
here is not right you will not succeed
bruh i think he's making
dating like this huge game like it's
actually really complicated he's doing
way too many rules
like can we just like say what's up
straightforward and go from there in
each particular instance
does mj get right how to get her to
think about you non-stop quick
disclaimer if you haven't killed joe
bader and if you got a problem with
manipulating women this ain't for you
she wants to get to know more about you
she's like
well i want to know i want to figure out
more things about him she's asking these
questions you're putting them off or
you're
you know you're you're short answering
them that type of sh
and on top of that she's seeing you with
other women that actually causes her to
go on an
emotional roller coaster do not feel bad
about that because secretly all women
crave that
is that true a guy being mysterious
giving
shorter text messages not really giving
you a whole lot to work with
no i don't entertain that if you seem
like you're bored with me
then i'm gonna get bored with you i need
to feel like someone's invested
what about like the pullback method he
was talking about earlier where all
right you get the girl
attached to you and then ghost her i
feel like that creates
trauma yeah for all these girls like
yeah
all these issues with guys that's why
girls don't want to do stuff with guys
those guys just always want to play
games
so you think only guys wasn't playing
the games i didn't say that
okay i think girls play games too not
all of them some
do you don't see a goofy side of you she
sees
a nice masculine frame from you not evil
not
mad not angry a nice cool calm collected
frame and she sees
sexual desire that's what she has to see
around you
every single time so that's why you
flake
that's why you do all this stuff that
gives them okay
what is he doing instead of he must have
other person he must be with other girls
the guy you like now he's hanging other
girls
he's not texting back and you're
thinking what's he doing what
is that how gonna make you desire them
no
no no no no no no it just shows lack of
interest yeah and then it's like okay
so any guys that you've dated in the
past or anything they're bet they've
been more like i guess you could say
gentlemanly and didn't
uh do any pullback methods or any sort
of mysterious
i'd say so you're saying with you or not
um like the guy oh you don't know what
he's doing
oh where is he he's not hitting me back
why is he
that's just immaturity i feel like men
don't do that
and i don't look for boys it just hit me
i tried to look for maturity and like a
man that sums it up
that was it yeah you're two favorite
guys mj get right and
you know they're annoying i like putting
the batman who'd you like better stuff
is cold or nj
so the end-all be-all best way to get a
girl to like you
you know what my whole thing is how can
guys answer that question i think if
guys really want to know the answer to
why
or to how to get a girl or whatever ask
a girl
yeah because the girl's gonna tell you
straight up how to get uh
like they're gonna tell you what they're
looking for it's all these hurt
like bothered guys that have been broken
by girls
that are making these videos what do you
think about the concept
of if you want to learn how to catch a
gazelle don't ask a gazelle ask a lion
do you what do you think about that
phrase
i think that has nothing to do with
dating i think that has to do with
hunting and killing someone
so like if i there's a guy who gets a
lot of girls
and then there's a beautiful girl you
think the girl will give better advice
for how to get girls than the guy would
i think maybe you should just read your
woman's brain book and
maybe you'll figure it out well no that
was the quest i mean the other
what do you think about that i can't
answer these questions any longer
like you seem to think one way and
that's and that's fine
but good luck finding a girl who will
agree with that hey yo what the [ __ ]
yeah i don't i don't think it's very
common these videos are very popular
how do you think they do with women with
all these tests why do we put so much
effort into doing that i know you don't
think they
hurt yeah listen yeah let me repeat
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