How To Improve Your Decision Making
Summary
TLDRIn this insightful video, Rob Dial Jr. shares five strategies for making better decisions amidst life's overwhelming choices. He emphasizes finding your 'North Star'—a clear life plan to align your choices with your long-term goals. Dial also advocates trusting your gut, backed by neuroscience showing our 'second brain' in the gut influences cognition. He suggests embracing the power of pause, using the 10110 Rule for perspective, and recognizing the paradox of too many choices. These techniques aim to bolster confidence in decision-making and reduce the fatigue of constant choosing.
Takeaways
- 🌟 Identify Your North Star: Create a clear vision for your life to guide your decisions and actions towards what you truly want to achieve.
- 🧭 Align Actions with Your Goals: Ensure every decision aligns with your North Star to maintain direction and purpose in life.
- 💰 Money as a Byproduct: Recognize that wealth is often a byproduct of pursuing your passion rather than the primary goal.
- 🔋 Follow Your Energy: Pay attention to where your energy is drawn; it can indicate what you are genuinely passionate about.
- 🚫 Practice Saying No: Develop the skill of declining opportunities that do not align with your North Star to stay focused on your path.
- 🤔 Trust Your Gut: Intuition, backed by neuroscience, can be a powerful tool in decision-making, especially in assessing situations or people.
- 🧘♂️ Embrace the Power of Pause: Take moments of reflection to allow your brain to shift from a reactive to a more logical state before making decisions.
- 🗓️ Apply the 10/10/10 Rule: Gain perspective by considering how you will feel about a decision in 10 minutes, 10 months, and 10 years.
- 💆♀️ Listen to Your Emotions: Emotions and instincts are not unreliable; they can provide valuable insights into your decisions.
- 🏋️♂️ Strengthen Decision-Making Confidence: Use the strategies discussed to bolster confidence in your choices and reduce second-guessing.
- 📚 The Paradox of Choice: Recognize that too many options can lead to decision fatigue and paralysis by analysis, and sometimes less is more.
Q & A
What are the five simple strategies mentioned in the video for making better decisions?
-The video does not explicitly list five strategies, but it emphasizes finding your North Star, trusting your gut feeling, embracing the power of the pause, using the 10/10/10 rule, and understanding the Paradox of Choice as key approaches to improve decision-making.
What is the significance of finding your North Star in decision-making?
-Your North Star represents your long-term goals and values. It helps you align every decision with what you truly want in life, providing a clear direction and making it easier to say 'no' to things that don't align with your vision.
Why is it important to create a plan for what you want your life to be?
-Creating a life plan helps you to filter your decisions through your long-term goals and aspirations, ensuring that your choices are consistent with the life you are trying to create.
What does the term 'gut feeling' refer to in the context of the video?
-In the video, 'gut feeling' refers to intuition, which is supported by recent neuroscience research showing that it might be a powerful tool in decision-making, especially in assessing situations or people.
How does the speaker suggest using your gut feeling in conjunction with your intellect?
-The speaker suggests not blindly following your gut but using it in tandem with your intellect. It implies taking a moment to breathe, reflect on how a decision feels, and then making a decision that is informed by both your emotions and rational thinking.
What is the '10/10/10 rule' and how can it help with decision-making?
-The '10/10/10 rule' is a method to gain perspective by asking how you will feel about a decision in 10 minutes, 10 months, and 10 years. It helps to break the immediate emotional response and encourages long-term thinking.
What is the Paradox of Choice and how does it relate to decision-making?
-The Paradox of Choice suggests that an abundance of options can lead to decision paralysis and analysis. It implies that having fewer choices can sometimes lead to better decision-making by reducing decision fatigue.
How does the speaker describe the relationship between the gut and the brain?
-The speaker describes the gut as having a complex system that can influence both physiological and psychological processes in the brain. There is a bidirectional communication between the gut and the brain, allowing them to influence each other.
What is the role of the inter-nervous system (ENS) in decision-making according to the video?
-The ENS, often referred to as the 'second brain,' is a network of neurons in the digestive tract. It can influence cognitive function and memory, making it a significant factor in how our gut feelings can affect decision-making.
How does the speaker suggest using the power of the pause in decision-making?
-The speaker suggests taking a moment of reflection, such as a few minutes or deep breaths, before making a decision. This pause allows the brain to shift from a reactive state to a more logical and reasoned state, leading to better decision-making.
What is the mindset Mentor plus and how does it relate to the podcast?
-Mindset Mentor plus is an additional resource designed by the speaker to help listeners actively integrate the podcast's teachings into their lives. It includes detailed worksheets, journaling questions, challenges, assignments, and monthly Q&A sessions.
Outlines
🌟 Finding Your North Star for Decision Making
The speaker introduces five strategies to improve decision-making, starting with the concept of finding your 'North Star'—a guiding vision for life that aligns all decisions with one's long-term goals. This involves creating a plan for what you want your life to look like in the future and filtering decisions through this vision. The speaker emphasizes that a North Star is not just about making more money but about what you are passionate about and want to dedicate your life to. They share personal examples, such as shutting down an Amazon business to focus on podcasting and coaching, illustrating how following one's passion can lead to fulfillment and success.
🤔 Trusting Your Gut for Better Decisions
The second strategy discussed is the importance of trusting one's gut feelings in decision-making. The speaker explains that gut feelings are not just mystical but have a scientific basis, rooted in the enteric nervous system (ENS), which is often referred to as our 'second brain.' The ENS communicates with the brain and can influence cognitive function and memory. Studies show that trusting gut instincts can lead to better predictions and judgments compared to relying solely on facts. The speaker encourages listeners to pay attention to their gut feelings and use them in conjunction with intellect to make informed decisions.
🧘 Embracing the Power of the Pause
The speaker introduces the concept of 'the power of the pause,' which involves taking a moment of reflection before making a decision. This pause allows the brain to shift from a reactive state, driven by the amygdala, to a more logical state governed by the prefrontal cortex. The speaker suggests that even a brief pause can help in making better decisions by reducing decision fatigue and allowing for clearer, more rational thought processes. They also mention the 10110 Rule, created by Susan Welch, as a method for gaining perspective by considering how one will feel about a decision in 10 minutes, 10 months, and 10 years, thus promoting long-term thinking over immediate reactions.
🔮 The 10110 Rule for Decision Perspective
This paragraph delves deeper into the 10110 Rule, a technique for evaluating decisions by considering their impact at different time frames. The speaker provides examples of how to apply this rule, such as evaluating a job decision's effect on family time and financial status in the short and long term. By projecting feelings and outcomes into the future, the 10110 Rule helps to break the immediate emotional response and encourages a more thoughtful, long-term approach to decision-making.
🏋️♂️ Understanding the Paradox of Choice and Decision Fatigue
The final strategy presented is understanding the 'Paradox of Choice,' which suggests that having too many options can lead to decision paralysis and reduced satisfaction. The speaker references interviews with older individuals who express that modern abundance of choices can be overwhelming. They mention Jeff Bezos' approach to limit the number of important decisions made per day to maintain decision quality. The speaker concludes by reiterating the importance of identifying one's North Star and using the discussed techniques to filter decisions effectively, thus improving overall life choices.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Decision Making
💡North Star
💡Gut Feeling
💡Intuition
💡Emotional Compass
💡Paradox of Choice
💡Decision Fatigue
💡Pause
💡10110 Rule
💡Mindset
💡Perspective
Highlights
The importance of finding your North Star, a guiding plan for life, to align decisions with your life goals.
Creating a North Star involves envisioning what you want your life to look like in 5 or 20 years and dedicating your life to it.
The misconception that making more money should be the North Star, when it's actually a byproduct of pursuing your true passion.
The value of following your energy and passion, like the speaker's preference for teaching mindset over other potentially lucrative activities.
Practicing the art of saying 'no' to opportunities that do not align with your North Star.
The story of the speaker's life-changing decision to close his Amazon business and pursue podcasting and coaching, illustrating the power of aligning with one's North Star.
The concept of trusting your gut as a tool for decision making, backed by neuroscience.
The role of the enteric nervous system (ENS) as our 'second brain' in the gut, influencing cognitive function and memory.
The bidirectional communication between the gut and the brain, and its impact on decision making.
The paradox of choice, where too many options can lead to decision paralysis and reduced decision quality.
The 10/10/10 rule as a method for gaining perspective on decisions by considering short-term and long-term feelings.
The benefits of embracing the power of the pause, allowing the brain to shift from reactive to logical reasoning.
The recommendation to limit daily decisions to focus on the most important ones, as practiced by successful individuals like Jeff Bezos.
The introduction of Mindset Mentor Plus, a program designed to help integrate podcast lessons into listeners' lives with additional resources.
The emphasis on improving decision-making by understanding and applying the discussed strategies to align with one's North Star.
A call to action for listeners to share the podcast and join the Mindset Mentor Plus community for further growth and connection.
Transcripts
welcome to today's video today I'm going
to give you five simple strategies to
help you make better decisions let's
dive in as a human especially now we
have so many choices what do we do
what's the right choice and so what we
need to do is we need to figure out how
can we make choices that are better for
what we want for the life we're trying
to create and after we make those
choices how do we stand firmly in those
choices versus getting like buyers were
more or oh my god did I make the wrong
decision you start questioning yourself
okay so I'm going to give you a couple
different tips to help you with that the
first one is to find your North Star I
think this is really important and this
is something that people don't speak
about enough and I think it might be one
of the most important things that you
ever do which is actually create a plan
of what you want your life to be so that
you can find every single action that
you take every decision that you make if
it is in alignment with what it is that
you're trying to create and so what you
want to do is you want to find your
fourth star of what it is that you're
doing where you're going what you're
trying to create and then filter all of
your decisions through that so like
where do you want to be in your life if
you fast forward 5 years or 20 years
what do you want your life to look like
maybe most important is what do you want
to dedicate your life to you want to
create this North Star and then all
decisions filter through that North Star
and if it's just I want to make more
money that's not what you want that's
not a North star that's just you know
money is just just a byproduct of what
you do along the way of this this
journey to your Northstar cuz there's a
million ways to make a million dollars I
always say like for me like I'm I'm good
at a few things like I'm really good in
sales because I've been in sales for a
long time I've trained over 2,000 sales
reps I know a lot about watches I love
watches uh I know a lot about sports I
know a lot about these things and I
could sure I could probably start a
podcast on Sports if I wanted to I could
probably go buy and resell watches and
make a lot of money doing that I could
probably be a sales coach if I wanted to
do that I could probably make great
money doing any of those things but I
don't want to do that that's just not
what I want to do like many times people
have been like Rob you've been
podcasting for so long why don't you
create a course on podcasting it's
because like I don't want to that's not
I'm not I'm not passionate about
teaching other people to grow a podcast
nothing else makes me come alive as much
as mindset and understanding what makes
people tick and then teaching that to
other people that is the thing that I
love the most and so what you want to do
is you want to follow your energy for
that when I look at like teaching people
sales is that what I want to do uh not
really what does my energy say my energy
saying
no do I want to buy and resell watches
no not really follow my energy my energy
is not rich in that one do I want to
start a sports podcast or a sports blog
H not really much energy there do I want
to help people with their mindset B yes
that's what it is okay cool I'm
following my energy and I'm going to
limit my choices based off of what it is
that I think I might want to do you know
and and then what it comes down to is if
it's not in my North Star it's a no it's
a no it's just easy and get better at
saying no like back in the day it was
actually crazy yesterday we ended up
getting a new house and on the way back
from getting the keys to the house I
stopped in at a Starbucks that I haven't
been in in a very long time I Haven been
there probably 8 years and the last time
I was there was when I made the decision
to shut down my Amazon company this was
8 and a half years ago I made the
decision to shut down my Amazon business
and to go fully 100% into podcasting
into
coaching and it was crazy to think oh my
God I just closed on this house which I
absolutely love it's my dream housee
I'll probably never leave that place and
I was able to purchase it because I
followed my passion and I followed the
thing and I was in the Starbucks where I
made the decision to go 100% into
coaching into podcast casting and to get
out of running an Amazon business it was
just a great it was like the time kind
of warped and I was sitting there I was
like man this is wild I'm so glad that I
made that decision because it's created
the life that I have now and so maybe
for you like being a great parent is
your North Star being the best parent
you could possibly be as your North Star
will then filter all of your decisions
through that maybe you get a job offer
making double what you're making right
now oh my God that's amazing amazing but
you have to travel for half of the
month okay you'd be away from your
children in their early years does that
line up with your North Star you might
make more money but you be away from
your children in their formative years
would you rather have more money or
would you rather have more time with
your children okay well that makes it
really easy well I guess maybe not
really easy it makes it easier if you're
North Stars I want to be the best parent
that I possibly can be and if if you
think okay well being the best parent I
possibly can be means I want to be with
my children as much as possible okay
well then even though I'm going to make
twice as much as I am now I'm going to
have half the amount of time that I have
right now with my children I don't know
if this lines up with my
Northstar that will help you make better
decisions but it will also give you more
confidence in your decision making after
you make them so you don't constantly go
back to oh did I make the right choice
did I screw up did I do the wrong thing
it's like no my Northstar is being the
best parent spend as much time as I
possibly kid can with my children in
their formative years I made the right
choice if it lines up with your North
Star you made the right choice so that's
the first thing find your Northstar the
second thing is to check in with your
gut you've probably heard the phrase
before trusting your gut right your gut
feeling has you get a gut feeling about
something or you get a gut feeling about
someone trusting your gut feeling can
seem like oo woo wooy and mystical and
very unscientific in decision decision
making but you know I love science and
going into it and I also love studies
about this stuff Recent research in
Neuroscience show that this isn't just a
theory it's actually a fact it turns out
that your gut feeling or your intuition
might actually be a really powerful tool
when you make decisions especially when
it comes to assessing situations or
people and so we're often taught like
hey we need to rely on facts we need to
rely on your intellect and we need to
make rational decisions right as if our
emotions and our instincts are something
we shouldn't pay attention to oh yeah
our emotions those are unreliable our
instincts are unreliable you can't trust
those things but there's a PHA there's a
a phrase that says the heart knows what
the Mind cannot understand sometimes we
can't fully comprehend how we feel about
a certain person or a situation it's
just a feeling we get that feeling and
that feeling is really important it's
worth your
consideration hey real quick I want to
introduce you to something called
mindset mentor plus if you love this
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you improve much faster I also do
monthly Q&A sessions in there and much
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click the link that's down in the
description and so research actually
shows that our gut feeling or intuition
is actually rooted in our physical
bodies and there's actually a part of
your your nervous system it's actually
called the inter nervous system enss and
it's a network of neurons that are
located in the walls of your digestive
tract huh holy this is real and
neurologists refer to the ens the inter
nervous system as your gut or your
second brain because there's so many
neurons in it and there's a study that
was published in the Journal of American
scientist in 1999 by Michael D Gerson
who's a professor of anatomy and cell
biology at Columbia University and he
actually found that the gut functions as
a separate and independent nervous
system from your central nervous system
and your gut has over 500 million
neurons your gut can also influence your
cognitive function and your memory as
well so your gut is a complex system
that's capable of influence both both
your influencing both your physiological
and your psychological processes in your
brain and so there's a communication
that happens between the ens and the
brain and its bidirectional which means
they can both kind of talk to each other
this basically means that your gut can
influence your brain and there's a ton
of studies that are coming out now about
how much your gut and your gut uh you
know system and everything that's in it
actually influences your brain and your
brain can then also influence your gut
so this is why you often experience uh
physical Sensations in your stomach when
you're nervous or you're anxious right
what do they call that you got
butterflies so what's interesting about
the gut is also connected to the amydala
which is the part of your brain that
processes all of your fear and so the
part of the brain that processes your
your fear and all of that um when you
look at it you can look at it and it's
actually your your fight or flight
response and so that means that our gut
is not just this this vague sense of
unease or uncertainty that we feel but
it's actually a physi uh not
physiological it's a physical response
to a perceived threat in your life or
even an opportunity and so when you do
get I'm saying all this just to
hopefully for those of you guys that are
very analytical to go huh maybe I should
pay attention to my gut feeling maybe I
should pay attention my my intuition
when you get a gut feeling about someone
or something you should probably pay
some attention to it maybe just maybe
it's because your body's trying to alert
you to maybe a danger that's coming up
maybe a opportunity that maybe your
conscious mind just hasn't been able to
register yet and so Studies have shown
that people who trust their gut
instincts are often able to predict
outcomes and make better accurate
judgments than people who just go solely
off of facts and figures so even if you
don't have all the information just take
a step back take a second and just think
about it and feel into it how does it
feel you know okay yeah this makes sense
for me to go and take a job that pays me
twice as much how do I feel though it
doesn't feel right I don't know why it
doesn't feel right okay well maybe your
brain's going to catch up and go that
means less time with my children yeah I
guess maybe that's maybe that's why I
didn't feel so right and so it doesn't
mean that you should just blindly follow
your gut that's not what I'm trying to
say and just ah just blindly follow your
gut but you can also use your gut and
you can use your intellect together and
make the best decisions you possibly can
and so it's the it's just really like I
always say your gut and the feelings of
your gut is your emotional compass and
you should always take a step back to
look at it and follow it if it feels
right so take six deep breaths I've got
a really big decision I'm going to take
six deep breaths and then close your
eyes and just feel what is it what do I
feel like I should do and see if that's
something that you can trust okay the
next thing is to embrace the power of
the pause and what does that mean you
know we live in a really fastpaced life
sometimes it's really good instead of
like always making decisions immediately
take a step back Sometimes the best
decisions come from a pause a moment of
reflection and neurologically taking a
step back allows the brain to shift it's
processing from a more reactive amydala
to the prefrontal cortex which is you
know so that the amydala is the fear so
it can immediately make a decision out
of fear let me take a step back let me
think about this for a minute it doesn't
have to be you know you don't always
have to sleep on it or take three days
to think about it let me take three
minutes real quick and what happens is
your brain shifts from the amydala A lot
of times to the prefrontal cortex which
is the part where you have logical
reasoning and you have planning and so
you know for significant decisions don't
immediately make a decision just say hey
I'm just going to take a couple minutes
I'm just going to take a real quick
break take two minutes do six deep
breaths see how you feel about it just a
little bit of that pause will help you
as well next thing that you can do to
help you make better decisions is to use
the What's called the 10110 Rule and so
it was created by a woman named Susan
Susan Welch and the 10110 rule is a way
to help you gain perspective in your
life and so it involves what it what it
it involves is that you sit there and
you start to think about the decision in
the immediate future then you push it a
little bit further out and then you push
it way out into the distant future
and so what you do is this is you ask
yourself three questions how will I feel
about this decision in 10
minutes and you Journal through it or
you allow yourself to answer it talk to
yourself out loud if there's no one else
around so you don't look cooky right
just how do I how I feel about this
decision in 10 minutes okay let's let's
talk about the let's talk about the the
child the being around your children and
the the job we've been talking about
right okay how will I feel about this
decision in 10 minutes if I take this
job and I spend way less time with my
children but I make a whole lot more
money well I might be excited in about
10 minutes okay cool how will I be
feeling in how will I feel about this in
10 months hm okay well in 10 months I'll
be with the company for about n and a
half months at that point I'll probably
be maybe excited because I'm making more
money I might be a little bit stressed
because I'm not spending much time with
my children I don't know I might I might
be kind of stressed because you know in
10 months from now Stacy's going to
start soccer and I might not be around
for soccer as much as I want to be okay
well that's probably how I feel in about
10 months my wife might be a little bit
stressed out cuz I'm not around the kids
as much as I used to be and I might not
be able to help them with homework so I
might put a lot more weight on her
shoulders so it might be stressful for
her I might be feeling that stress as
well okay how will I feel about it in 10
years oh well in 10 years two of
the kids are going to be out of this
house I'm not they might be out of the
house it might be at College at that
point damn I don't know if I'm going to
be happy about this decision in 10 years
because I'm going to think to myself I
shouldn't have taken that job because I
wish I had more time with the children
and now they're out of the house so it's
how will I feel about it in 10 minutes
how will I feel about it in 10 months
how will I feel about it in 10 years and
the method helps breaking the immediate
emotional response to something and
allow you to kind of really think a
little bit more long term towards
something and so that might be really
perfect for you to kind of take a step
back another example be like let's say
you want to end a long-term relationship
and so you know you have a a fiveyear
relationship that you've been in it's
had its ups and its downs and you think
how will I feel in 10 minutes okay right
after making decision I might feel a
mixture of relief I might actually feel
like oh man this is this is good I might
be sad that I'm not with them anymore I
but also at the same time I don't have
to deal with their BS anymore what about
10 months how am I going to feel well
I'm going to have to get used to being
single again I'm going to have to go on
those dating apps I'm going to have to
ReDiscover
myself uh I might love my choice of
being single I might miss them okay how
am I going to feel in 10 years 10 years
from
today will I feel that this led to a
happier more fulfilling life uh would I
feel like I made the right choice so
that I could pursue personal happiness
and growth or do I feel like there be
regrets about like things not working
out and so what happens is you start to
look at this and you break it down in 10
minutes 10 months 10 years and you can
kind of put yourself into the future and
start to see what it might be and then
the last thing I'm going to tell you
guys is to understand that there's a
really big Paradox of choice too many
options can be overwhelming I love
watching interviews with people who are
like in their their 70s their 80s their
'90s and what they they always say the
same thing they're like oh children now
and Kids now and people now like it'd be
really hard for me to be in their their
circumstance cuz they've got so many
options they got so many choices like
when I married my wife you know 65 years
ago I lived in a town of 400 people now
they have these dating apps where they
can get 400 choices of women to date and
they're like it's too much or like
there's so many things to watch there's
so many things to do there's so much
things to to occupy your time with it
seems like when it was simpler people
were happier a lot of times and that's
the the Paradox of choice you know a
book that's actually called the Paradox
of choice and it suggests that all of
this abundance of choices can actually
lead to paralysis by analysis and so
sometimes it's better to limit your
choices have less choices because it's
going to limit your decision fatigue is
what they call it so as far as decision
fatigue is as there's too many decisions
you have to make at one time it can be
really toxic on your brain and Jeff
Bezos who's you know always going
between number one and number two and
number three the richest men in the
world he owns Amazon he he says that he
only makes three important decisions per
business day and so he puts all of his
mind into those three big decisions
instead of saying hey let's go to a
meeting and ask me as many questions you
possibly can I'll help you make
decisions the more choices that you're
forced to make in a shorter amount of
time the less quality of your decisions
as well so maybe you just say hey I'm
going to make less decisions I'm going
to make less decisions but I'm going to
concentrate on the most important
decisions and so that's really what it
comes down to all tips to make better
choices because ultimately and I think
the most important one is before you do
any of them is figure out what your
North Star is who do you want to be what
do you want to be what you what do you
what do you want your life to be and
then try to filter all of your decisions
through that and then also use the rest
these techniques to help you make better
decisions as well so that's what I got
for you for today's episode if you love
this episode please share it on
Instagram stories tag me at Rob dial Jr
r o b d a ljr this podcast only grows
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