Do THIS to SHUT DOWN Narcissists’ Flying Monkeys and Smear Campaigns For Good

Summary

In this engaging conversation, Rebecca Zang, a top trial attorney and author, discusses her high conflict negotiation training program with a recent graduate, Dorothy Vaugh. The program equips coaches with strategies to handle high-conflict individuals, focusing on emotional strength and strategic goals. Dorothy shares her experiences dealing with a narcissist, and Rebecca offers insights on maintaining boundaries and leveraging one's authentic power. They explore coexisting with such individuals and the importance of mental strength in negotiation.

Takeaways

• 🌟 Rebecca Zang is a top trial attorney and author who has developed a program to train coaches in high conflict negotiation.
• 🎓 The program is designed with an online module and weekly classes, focusing on emotional strength and strategic goals for dealing with high conflict individuals.
• 🧠 Emotional strategies include teaching emotional regulation, setting healthy boundaries, mindfulness, and managing triggers.
• 🎯 The program emphasizes the importance of setting clear goals and strategies for negotiation, including communication techniques and maintaining leverage.
• 💡 A key concept is 'fluff for favor vomit later', which suggests managing the ego of high-conflict individuals while prioritizing emotional reactions afterward.
• 📉 Dorothy Vaugh, a graduate of the program, discusses her experiences dealing with a narcissist and the challenges of coexisting with their slander campaign.
• 🛡️ The importance of establishing an 'invisible shield' is highlighted to protect oneself from the emotional manipulation of high conflict individuals.
• 🌱 The program encourages letting go of the need for approval from those who are not aligned with one's energy, focusing on attracting like-minded, higher vibrational people.
• 🌐 Rebecca Zang's approach to negotiation involves understanding the psychological makeup of narcissists to ethically manipulate them using their own behaviors.
• 🔗 The program offers opportunities for graduates to become high conflict negotiation coaches, with potential applications in various fields including legal, personal, and workplace settings.
• 💼 Rebecca Zang also promotes her Shopify store and her book 'Outsmart the Narcissist', providing resources for individuals to deal with narcissistic behaviors.

Q & A

What is the main focus of the high conflict negotiation training program discussed in the script?

The program focuses on teaching coaches how to work with high conflict individuals, particularly those with narcissistic traits. It includes strategies for emotional strength and regulation, setting healthy boundaries, mindfulness, and controlling triggers. Additionally, it covers strategic goals, communication strategies, and negotiation tactics.

Who is Dorothy Vaugh and what is her role in the conversation?

Dorothy Vaugh is described as a 'gorgeous beautiful high conflict negotiation coach' and a recent graduate of the high conflict negotiation training program led by Rebecca. She is participating in a discussion to showcase her skills and share her experiences from the program.

What is the significance of the phrase 'fluff for favor vomit later' mentioned in the script?

The phrase 'fluff for favor vomit later' is a strategy for dealing with high-conflict individuals, suggesting that one should manage their ego and not immediately react to their provocations. The idea is to handle the situation tactfully at first and deal with one's emotional response later.

How does the script suggest dealing with a smear campaign initiated by a narcissist?

The script suggests putting up an 'invisible shield' around oneself and not engaging with the smear campaign. It emphasizes focusing on one's own emotional strength and letting go of the need to convince others of the truth, as the truth will eventually reveal itself.

What is the 'discard phase' mentioned in the script, and how does it relate to narcissists?

The 'discard phase' is a term used to describe the period when a person removes themselves from a relationship with a narcissist. During this phase, the narcissist often starts a smear campaign, spreading lies and untruths about the person who has left them.

What is the importance of having a high vibrational state when dealing with high-conflict individuals, as mentioned in the script?

Having a high vibrational state is important because it helps one maintain a positive and strong mental space, which can attract like-minded people and repel negative influences. It allows individuals to rise above the negativity of high-conflict individuals and not be affected by their attempts to provoke or manipulate.

How does Rebecca suggest one should react when people are playing both sides in a conflict involving a narcissist?

Rebecca advises that one should not try to be friends or friendly with people who are jealous or smaller than them. She suggests letting go of those who are not aligned with one's energy and focusing on maintaining a high vibrational state.

What is the 'slay method' mentioned in the script, and who is Rebecca Zang?

The 'slay method' is a proven strategy developed by Rebecca Zang, a top 1% trial attorney and USA Today best-selling author, to help people defeat narcissists in negotiations. Rebecca Zang has dedicated her career to helping people slay narcissists and take back control in high-conflict situations.

What are some of the potential applications of the high conflict negotiation training program discussed in the script?

The program can be applied in various settings such as personal life, legal negotiations, workplace conflicts, and community groups. It can be used to start a coaching business, assist attorneys in understanding high-conflict dynamics, or help navigate political toxicity in the workplace.

How can one book a call to learn more about becoming a high conflict negotiation coach according to the script?

Interested individuals can book a call by visiting rebecca.com/slaycoach or by signing up for a training session at highconsearch.com.

What is the significance of the Shopify mention at the end of the script?

The mention of Shopify is a promotional note indicating that Rebecca's business, like many others, uses Shopify as a platform to sell products online. It highlights the ease of use and global accessibility of Shopify for businesses.

Outlines

00:00

🎓 Introduction to High Conflict Negotiation Training

The speaker, Rebecca, warmly welcomes Dorothy Vaugh, a graduate of the High Conflict Negotiation Coach Training program. This program is designed to equip coaches with skills to handle high-conflict individuals, particularly focusing on emotional strength and strategic goals. The training includes online modules and weekly classes led by Rebecca. Dorothy appreciates the program's structure, which emphasizes emotional regulation, setting boundaries, mindfulness, and managing triggers. The second part of the program focuses on strategic negotiation strategies, including communication and staying on the offensive. Dorothy also highlights Rebecca's advice on dealing with high-conflict individuals, which involves not immediately reacting to their provocations but rather focusing on one's own emotional response later.

05:01

🛡️ Dealing with Smear Campaigns and Emotional Boundaries

Dorothy shares her personal experience of dealing with a narcissist who engaged in a smear campaign after she removed them from her life. She discusses the challenges of coexisting with people who believe the narcissist's lies and the emotional toll it takes. Rebecca advises on putting up an 'invisible shield' to protect oneself emotionally and not to fear putting up boundaries, even if it might upset others. The conversation emphasizes the importance of letting go of the need for approval from those who are not genuinely supportive and focusing on those who are truly on one's side.

10:02

🌟 Maintaining Personal Energy and Authenticity

The discussion continues with strategies for maintaining one's energy and authenticity when dealing with people who might be playing both sides. Rebecca suggests that one should not try to convince others of their truth but instead let their authentic self speak for them. The analogy of a clean hot tub versus a dirty pool is used to illustrate the importance of not allowing negative energy into one's personal space. The conversation emphasizes the idea that one should not engage with those who are not aligned with their energy and should focus on being in their own 'zone', unaffected by the negativity of others.

15:04

🌱 Growth and Opportunities in High Conflict Negotiation Coaching

Rebecca and Dorothy discuss the benefits of the High Conflict Negotiation Coach Training program, including personal growth and the ability to help others. They mention the upcoming training session and encourage interested individuals to book a call to learn more. Dorothy expresses her gratitude for the program and shares her plans to use her new skills in various settings, such as the workplace, to help navigate political toxicity. The conversation highlights the versatility of the skills learned in the program and the potential for a lucrative career.

20:06

💸 Outsmarting Narcissists and the Power of Shopify

In the final paragraph, Rebecca reveals her expertise in dealing with narcissists, particularly in legal settings. She shares her journey of studying narcissism to help her clients and announces a live event where she will share her four-part proven plan to help people take back their power. Additionally, Rebecca promotes Shopify as a platform that has helped her and many others sell products worldwide, offering a $1 trial period for interested users.

Keywords

💡High Conflict Negotiation

High Conflict Negotiation refers to the process of resolving disputes or reaching agreements in situations where the parties involved have strong, opposing views and emotions are high. In the video, Dorothy Vaugh, a coach trained by Rebecca Zang, discusses her experience with the High Conflict Negotiation Coach Training program, which aims to equip individuals with the skills to navigate and resolve such conflicts effectively.

💡Narcissist

A narcissist is someone with an inflated sense of self-importance, often requiring admiration from others and lacking empathy for people around them. In the script, the discussion revolves around dealing with narcissists, particularly in the context of high-conflict situations. The term is used to describe individuals who spread untruthful lies and engage in slander campaigns.

💡Coaching

Coaching, in this context, refers to a form of professional development that aims to enhance an individual's skills or performance in a specific area. The video discusses a coaching program designed to train individuals to handle high-conflict situations, particularly those involving narcissistic individuals.

💡Emotional Strength

Emotional strength pertains to an individual's ability to manage their emotions effectively, especially in challenging situations. The script mentions that the training program focuses on building emotional strength, such as emotional regulation and mindfulness, which are crucial for dealing with high-conflict individuals.

💡Strategic Goals

Strategic goals are objectives that are part of a broader plan or strategy. In the video, Rebecca Zang discusses the importance of setting strategic goals in negotiations, which involves determining the steps and strategies to achieve a desired outcome when dealing with high-conflict individuals.

💡Flying Monkeys

In the context of the video, 'flying monkeys' is a term used to describe individuals who are manipulated or recruited by narcissists to spread their negative narratives or engage in harmful behaviors. The script discusses how narcissists find 'flying monkeys' to perpetuate their lies and slander.

💡Slander Campaign

A slander campaign involves the deliberate spreading of false information or rumors about someone to damage their reputation. The script mentions that after removing a narcissist from one's life, they often engage in a slander campaign, spreading untruthful lies to harm the person's standing in the community.

💡Invisible Shield

The 'invisible shield' is a metaphor used in the video to describe the psychological or emotional barrier one must create to protect themselves from the negative influence of high-conflict individuals. It is mentioned as a strategy to prevent being affected by the smear campaigns initiated by narcissists.

💡Authentic Power

Authentic power refers to the genuine influence one has that comes from being true to oneself and one's values. In the script, Rebecca Zang emphasizes the importance of standing in one's authentic power when dealing with narcissists and high-conflict situations, suggesting that this approach can lead to more effective negotiation and personal growth.

💡Vibrational Energy

Vibrational energy, as discussed in the video, refers to the concept that individuals emit a certain 'vibe' or energy level, which can attract similar energies. The script suggests that maintaining a high vibrational energy can help attract positive influences and repel negative ones, such as those associated with narcissists.

💡Coherence Meditation

Coherence meditation is a type of meditation aimed at achieving a state of inner harmony and balance. The video script mentions coherence meditation as a tool to help individuals maintain a high vibrational state, which can be beneficial when dealing with the challenges posed by high-conflict individuals.

Highlights

Introduction of Dorothy Vaugh as a high conflict negotiation coach.

Description of the high conflict negotiation training program.

Mention of the program's online module for learning coaching techniques.

Emphasis on emotional strength training within the program.

Discussion on setting strategic goals as part of the program.

Highlight of a key program quote: 'fluff for favor vomit later'.

Dorothy's personal experience dealing with a narcissist and slander campaign.

Rebecca's introduction of her SLAY method for dealing with narcissists.

Explanation of the 'discard phase' and smear campaign in dealing with narcissists.

Advice on creating an 'invisible shield' to protect oneself.

Importance of letting go and not trying to convince others of one's truth.

Discussion on the inevitability of narcissists' behavior and the need to rise above it.

Analogies comparing energy levels and the need to maintain a high vibration.

Rebecca's advice on not being friends with those who are jealous or smaller than you.

The concept of 'ethically manipulating' narcissists using their own behavior.

Recommendation to focus on personal growth and authentic power.

Invitation to book a call to learn more about becoming a high conflict negotiation coach.

Promotion of the next training session for potential coaches.

Dorothy's endorsement of the program and its applicability in various settings.

Rebecca's offer for a $1 trial period for her Shopify store.

Rebecca's confession about her motivation for studying narcissism to help people.

Introduction of Rebecca's four-part proven blueprint for dealing with narcissists.

Transcripts

I'm so there she

is beautiful and I see people here from

South Jersey and

Maine and hi Dorothy I'm so glad you're

here and Dorothy vaugh is one of our

gorgeous beautiful um high conflict

negotiation coaches and I'm g go back

because feel like now all of a sudden my

head is cut

off um but it is great to see you it is

great to see you too

Rebecca

so I am was just talking about you and

our program which is the high conflict

negotiation training the coach training

and you are one of our recent

graduates yay

yeah so um talk a little bit about the

program and then we're going to just do

a little bit of coaching and then um I

was gonna have you showcase some of your

skills as well yes so Rebecca the the

the training program is so wonderful

because the way that you've designed it

is you have an online module where you

go through all of the steps to learn how

to coach high conflict individuals and

then you have these um online classes

that you um lead and teach us different

strategies and steps and so it's like a

weekly training program that gets you

towards the end and um and what I like

so much about the program is you're you

kind of split it up into two components

where you're you're teaching coaches how

to um help their clients um with their

emotional strength like there's a lot of

emotional strategies like um emotional

regulation you know healthy boundaries

mindfulness controlling triggers like

when you're dealing with high conflict

individuals you have to be mentally

strong and then the second part I love

that you have is about the Strategic

goals so how what is your goal what are

the strategies and the steps to get

there building that leverage um

determining how to communicate with

these high conflict individuals and

um you know staying on the offensive you

know these are all the the strategies on

how to negotiate which are is is very

brilliant how you designed the program

one of my favorite quotes that you do is

fluff for favor vomit later and I love

that because when you're dealing with

the high-c conflict individual it's all

about groping their ego and letting it

go and then you know worrying about your

emotional uh reaction to that later on

so these are just some of the things

that I love how you designed the program

and um I I'm so grateful that that you

offer this to so many people out there

that want to help others that have gone

through um challenges with high conflict

individuals yeah thank you well I know

you you have done a great job I've seen

such amazing growth in you thank you

since we started the program and um

today you were going to uh bring me a

little issue for me to coach you on so

talk about what you've been dealing with

a little something yes so um dealing

with high conflict individuals

specifically narcissist um I had a

narcissist that um that that I removed

from my life about five years ago and

usually when you remove them they go on

a slander campaign um you know spreading

untruthful lies about you um you know

saying things that you're doing or

actions that are taking place that

really aren't taking place and so I've

had challenges in the community you know

through my children's school um even in

some you know women's groups that I

attend where you know this narcissist

has a way of finding others like flying

monkeys or other narcissists to kind of

get their way in there and and this

narrative about you and it's very

challenging and I just how do you

coexist with people that believe their

story fed up with narcissist walking all

over you sick of everyone believing

their lies while you're paying through

the nose and attorney's fees what if you

could hold all the cards for a change

hey I'm Rebecca Zang I'm a top one%

trial attorney a USA Today best-selling

author and I've spent my entire career

helping people people slay narcissists

in negotiations most recently through my

proven slay method what if your

suffering could become your superpower

imagine turning all that pain into Power

not just for you but for others too this

is your chance to Take Back Control you

can finally win become a high conflict

negotiation certified coach help others

while transforming your own life and do

good for the world

this is your chance go to rebecca.com

slapp and I'll show you how to turn the

tables for good starting today so as you

know when you go into the discard phase

there's always the smear campaign right

that's always the birth of the smear

campaign and so there's always going to

be getting more and more Supply from you

and they're going to try to get more

Supply from you I was would say it's

sort of like at the bottom of the peanut

butter jar like they're going to look to

see is there more down there can I

scrape a little bit more down there from

the bottom of that peanut butter jar

right and um the you know I always say

as you guys know that the very first

thing that you have to do is put that

invisible shield down around you and um

as empaths we always want to um you know

we don't want to make people mad we

don't want to get people upset we don't

want to oh you know I don't want that

person to to not like me or whatever and

so we end up trying to keep the peace

and um and so and it ends up eating Us

Alive inside because we don't want to

put the boundaries up because we're

afraid people are going to get mad at us

if we do that or we're going to we're

afraid people are going to think that

we're not like able if we put the

boundaries up um and I know that

happened with me when um I ended up um

having a a Business Partnership that

didn't go the way I wanted it to um and

and the more that I tried to not have it

be a um a uh you know I wanted it to be

an amicable uh situation where we split

um it it just wasn't going to be

amicable because when you're trying to

remove yourself from that situation it's

never going to be amicable because your

supply the supply is going out the door

and so everybody in their world is going

to

be um part of that what I have found

honestly is you have to just let it go

and the people who are going to be your

people are going to be your people and

the people who are not your people are

not your people and you just have to say

stop trying to make not your people your

people and they they were going to be at

a low vibration and they're going to say

whatever they're going to say and you

just have to let that go and the people

who are your people are your

people and that's that and the higher

vibrational people will will end up

being attracted to you because that like

attracts like and lower vibrational

people will find each other and they're

gonna say whatever they're gonna say and

you're never going to be able to stop

them from saying what they're going to

say I mean you're just not

but the light comes out in the end the

truth comes out in the end and you know

I I have a saying that I I've said to

you guys in our groups that um you

know I I said to myself you know

whatever and the

whatever right and you just have to like

go not give them a thought

because you know I and you guys know

that I've often talked about Glinda the

Good Witch and the Wicked Witch and you

know she said to the wicked witch in The

Wizard of Oz go away you have no power

here right go away you have no power

here well I'm sure the wicked witch was

sitting around with the Flying Monkey

saying oh that Glenda she's awful or

whatever and you know like talking crap

about

Glenda well was Glinda worried about

what wicked witch was saying no she was

like been her she's in her power so you

just got to go whatever you know

you got to be in your Zone and be like

Teflon because they're going to do and

say whatever they're going to do and

you're not going to be able to stop them

but if you just have your coherence you

know do that coherence meditation that I

talked about and have your zone of

vibration so high

that it's like okay whatever um you know

Wayne Dyer talked about that uh at one

point where he was like talking about

how somebody was asking him about

um something when he went on a

television show and um they were going

to ask him about did you know proving if

he had done something or didn't do

something or I'm going to bring in

medical records or whatever remember

that and and he was like I don't need to

prove it whatever I'm not doing that at

this point like he didn't care because

he was here here and they were there

there and he wasn't even even going to

speak to it because he just didn't he

was over here right and it was like so

beyond him at that point that he just

didn't

even doesn't he wanted to talk about his

own other higher level things at that

point and and that's where you have have

to get to because they're going to say

whatever they're gonna say yeah and you

can't control The Narrative of one of

the things that I've learned through and

and then I will help to

is that you always want to try convince

people that you're in the truth and

they're in the wrong and it's exhausting

to do that and like you said it's like

the truth will be

revealed um and you just have to let the

forces be and let be authentic self and

that and let that speak truth and um and

I think one of the questions I do have

for you that I'm that some may not

figure out but have some answers is can

you co coexist with a community of

people that are playing on both sides

like they are friendly with you but

they're also friendly with the

narcissist you can't ever be friends or

friendly with people who are jealous of

you or smaller than you yeah you can't

that you just want to get that energy

out of you um and away from you um you

know I heard a

um a story one time and I thought it was

such a it was kind of like uh a little

bit vulgar but

so

um such a great way of putting it it's

like if you invited people over to to if

let's say you went over to somebody's

house and um it was like the best

invitation you've ever heard of like to

go to somebody's house let's say it's

Oprah's house or whatever to go swim in

their pool and and the pool was like

green and gross and whatever and you

would you'd be like I'm not getting in

that pool right but then you invited

people to your house and let's say it's

your hot tub and you like maintained it

perfectly and you had the PA and you had

like the measuring thing and you had it

pristine and you had all the whatever um

to make sure that it's perfect clean

gorgeous and then you you you let people

in and then they what do they do they

peed in it right you'd be like get the

hell out of my my hot tub oh my God but

it's the same thing because energy is

like that potent

right I mean we have we are vibrating

beings that's what we are and we are

beings of energy and so if we let that

energy in our space it can't help but

permeate us it can't help but that uh

make it make make us vibrate

lower and and

like radio waves can't join hands with

light waves and travel in the universe

together together so if you want to be a

light wave you got to let go of the of

the radio waves and move on that makes

sense yeah total sense

yeah so just wish them well but over

there

yeah you have great

analogies I

love yeah I mean you just you

don't I don't I always say you know when

it when it comes to negotiating with

narcissists that you want to look at it

agnostically you know we talk about in

the program how they were formed and

what's going on with their brain and so

we create strategies and leverage to

ethically manipulate them using their

own

behavior yeah right and and then you

move on it's really focusing on you and

your authentic power and becoming the

best version of yourself and

authentically standing in yourself it's

really not about them because they're

going to be who they are yeah yes they

will and and that's why I like your

program so because you give that that

piece of the mental strength that goes

with it to make the smart decisions so

that you're strong enough to get to that

strategy you know and that's so

important because you have you can't

have the mental strength with strategy

and you can't have the strategy without

the mental strength right so that's

what's so great about the high Contra um

training program that you

offer thank you yeah so for anybody

who's interested in becoming a high

conflict negotiation coach

the link to uh book a call with us is

rebecca.com

slay coach and um I highly recommend

that you book a call with us uh

rebecca.com

coach or we are having a uh a training

next week to learn more about it that is

next Tuesday at 10 a.m. Pacific and the

link to sign up for that is

highcon ct.com highcon

search.com I would love for you guys to

come join me on that and learn more

about the program just come learn more

about the program and um just you find

out if it's something that you want to

do um you know if you are interested in

um becoming a coach having a career that

you think might help you yourself

personally and also U be a lucrative uh

career for you then come join us next

Tuesday at 10: am or go ahead and book a

call right now so thank you Dorothy oh

this is great and I highly recommend the

program I can't wait to use it um you

know in my life life to help others with

either a career or like there's so many

things you can do with it you can have

own business you can help attorneys that

don't understand it or as you know have

it in the workplace like some of the

that I'm doing is I'm using it in the

workplace helping others navigate

through the political um toxicity that

goes on there with high conflict so

there's so many ways to use it and I'm

just so grateful for the thank you M

thank you thank you Dorothy this is so

great thank you guys all right I will

see you all super soon all right thank

you bye bye

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have a confession to make and that is

that they are way more afraid of you

than you are of them especially in court

cases mediation cases or any kind of

cases where you have to negotiate with

them but you know what I have a

confession to make too I'm sick and

tired of these people bullying you and

making you feel exhausted and paying way

too much in attorney's fees and dragging

you through the mud my name is Rebecca

zung and I'm an attorney I've been

recognized by US News as one of the best

lawyers in America and in fact I was so

syn tired of these people bullying you

that I started studying narcissism so

that I could beat them in the courtroom

and now I'm here to make the case so

that you can win too I developed a

four-part proven blueprint that has

helped tens of thousands of people take

back their freedom win and get back

their power and now I'm sharing it with

you in a special live event outsmart the

narcissist The four-part Proven Plan to

take back your power four simple steps

one free live event one free hour of

your life that's what stands between you

being in hell and you being free join me

click the link for outsmart the

narcissist the four step proven plan to

take back your power just click the link

and let's go