Are you NEWLY SOBER??? Beware of THESE 10 THINGS in early sobriety!!! - (Episode 176)

Summary

In this 'Getting Sober' episode, Jay discusses 10 crucial aspects to be mindful of during early sobriety. He warns against underestimating the struggle, the temptation of old drinking companions, and the danger of premature declarations of success. Jay emphasizes the importance of avoiding familiar drinking environments, managing boredom, and dealing with stress without resorting to alcohol. He also advises against developing new bad habits and encourages viewers to seek support and stay committed to their sobriety journey, offering bonus tips for maintaining progress.

Takeaways

• 😀 Early sobriety can be deceptive; feeling better might lead to overconfidence and relapse.
• 👫 Be cautious with friends who still drink, as their habits can influence you to return to old behaviors.
• 🌟 Avoid 'jinxing' your sobriety by prematurely announcing it or assuming you're in complete control.
• 🏠 Sobriety involves a lifestyle change; avoid places and situations that remind you of alcohol.
• 🍷 Beware of thinking you can drink 'responsibly' after a period of sobriety; it's a slippery slope.
• ⚠️ Watch out for cross-addictions, where you might pick up other harmful habits to cope with cravings.
• 🏋️‍♂️ Pair sobriety with healthy habits like exercise, better diet, and new hobbies to support your mental and physical health.
• 🥱 Combat boredom by engaging in activities that keep your mind off alcohol and provide a sense of purpose.
• 😓 Manage stress proactively, using it as an opportunity to learn new coping mechanisms instead of turning to alcohol.
• 🚫 Avoid the victim mentality and focus on the positive aspects of sobriety, like financial savings and improved health.
• 💪 Be prepared for social situations where you might be pressured to drink and have a response ready to maintain your sobriety.

Q & A

What is the first thing to be aware of in early sobriety according to the video?

The first thing to be aware of in early sobriety is the feeling of getting better and becoming overconfident, which might lead to thoughts of drinking in moderation or on specific occasions, potentially causing a relapse.

Why is it important to be cautious about hanging out with friends who still drink during early sobriety?

Hanging out with friends who still drink can contribute to more wild times and expose you to temptations, which can lead you back to your old habits of daily binge drinking.

What is the significance of not jinxing your sobriety in the early stages?

Not jinxing your sobriety means not prematurely celebrating or announcing it too early, as this might lead to overconfidence and a false sense of control over alcohol cravings, which can result in relapse.

How does the video suggest changing your environment can impact your sobriety?

The video suggests that changing your environment by avoiding places and situations associated with alcohol can help maintain sobriety, similar to how one would avoid a toxic ex-partner's environment after a breakup.

What is the potential danger of thinking that having one drink will be different after a period of sobriety?

The danger lies in underestimating the power of alcohol and the potential to quickly become addicted again, as the desire for alcohol often stems from the feelings it provides rather than the taste.

Why should one be cautious about picking up other bad habits as a way to cope in early sobriety?

Picking up other bad habits, or cross-addictions, can be a misguided attempt to feel better, which might lead to new dependencies and unhealthy coping mechanisms instead of addressing the root causes of the initial addiction.

What role do hobbies and activities play in maintaining sobriety according to the video?

Hobbies and activities play a crucial role in maintaining sobriety by providing healthy outlets for energy and focus, helping to build new associations in the brain, and preventing boredom, which can be a trigger for relapse.

How does the video address the issue of boredom in early sobriety?

The video suggests that boredom can be a significant issue in early sobriety and encourages finding activities that keep the mind and body engaged, such as exercise, new hobbies, or re-engaging with old ones.

What is the advice given in the video regarding stress management during early sobriety?

The video advises not to turn to alcohol at the first sign of stress or anxiety, but instead to view these situations as opportunities to learn new solutions and to work on controlling one's emotions and responses.

Why is it important to avoid a victim mentality during early sobriety?

A victim mentality can hinder progress by focusing on what one perceives as unfair or limiting, rather than on the positive aspects of sobriety and the opportunities it presents for personal growth and better decision-making.

What are some bonus tips provided in the video for maintaining early sobriety?

Bonus tips include not expecting sobriety alone to solve all problems, not struggling in silence by seeking support, not taking on too many new changes at once to avoid added stress, and not quitting the journey even if progress seems slow or challenging.

Outlines

00:00

🍀 Early Sobriety: Pitfalls and Awareness

The paragraph discusses the initial phase of sobriety, highlighting the common misconceptions and challenges faced by individuals. It emphasizes the importance of not underestimating the struggle by thinking that feeling better means sobriety is easy. It warns against the temptation of returning to old habits, such as drinking in moderation, which can quickly lead back to addiction. The speaker also advises against socializing with friends who still drink, as it can jeopardize sobriety. The idea of 'jinxing' sobriety by prematurely celebrating milestones is cautioned against, as it might lead to overconfidence and relapse. Lastly, the paragraph stresses the need for a complete lifestyle change, suggesting that one should avoid places and situations that are strongly associated with alcohol consumption.

05:01

🌟 Pairing Sobriety with Healthy Habits

This section of the script focuses on the idea of combining sobriety with positive lifestyle changes. It suggests that just as alcohol was once a constant in one's life, now is the time to introduce healthy habits like diet and exercise. The speaker encourages viewers to keep busy with new hobbies or revisit old ones, as part of the process of rebuilding a life without alcohol. The aim is to not only maintain sobriety but to also improve physical and mental well-being, potentially inspiring others in the process. The paragraph also addresses the issue of boredom, which can be a trigger for relapse, and invites viewers to share activities that help them stay busy and focused, thereby supporting each other in the community.

10:03

🚫 Navigating Early Sobriety: Challenges and Tips

The final paragraph of the script offers additional advice for maintaining sobriety. It tackles the issue of stress, which is identified as a common trigger for relapse. The speaker advises using stress as an opportunity to find solutions rather than reaching for alcohol. The concept of a 'victim mentality' is also addressed, encouraging individuals to take control of their lives and make healthier decisions. The paragraph concludes with practical tips for new sober individuals, such as being prepared for questions about not drinking, and the importance of not struggling alone. It suggests seeking support through meetings, online groups, and educational resources. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of not taking on too much at once, to avoid overwhelming stress, and to keep going even when progress seems slow, framing sobriety as a tool for life improvement rather than a complete solution to all problems.

Keywords

💡Sobriety

Sobriety refers to the state of not being under the influence of alcohol or drugs and maintaining a clear mind. In the context of the video, it is the main theme as the speaker discusses the challenges and strategies for maintaining sobriety. The speaker mentions various aspects of early sobriety, such as avoiding triggers and developing new habits, to illustrate the importance of sobriety in one's life.

💡Cross Addictions

Cross addictions are tendencies to substitute one addictive substance or behavior for another. The speaker warns about picking up other bad habits to feel better, which can lead to cross addictions. This is a critical concept in the video as it highlights the need for awareness of how individuals might replace one addiction with another, such as turning to sugar, caffeine, nicotine, or even weed after quitting alcohol.

💡Toxic Relationships

A toxic relationship is one that is harmful to one's mental, emotional, or physical well-being. The video uses the analogy of a toxic ex-partner to explain the need to avoid places and situations associated with alcohol, just as one would avoid reminders of a toxic relationship. This analogy helps to convey the idea that sobriety involves a complete lifestyle change and distancing oneself from the 'toxic ex' of alcohol.

💡Binge Drinking

Binge drinking is a pattern of alcohol consumption that involves drinking large amounts of alcohol in a short period of time, usually with the intention of becoming intoxicated. The video discusses the cycle of sobriety and relapse, where individuals may fall back into binge drinking after a period of sobriety, illustrating the challenges of maintaining long-term sobriety.

💡Victim Mentality

Victim mentality is a mindset where an individual perceives themselves as a victim of their circumstances and lacks personal responsibility. The speaker advises against falling into a victim mentality in sobriety, emphasizing the importance of taking control of one's life and decisions. This concept is used to encourage individuals to take an active role in their recovery and not to feel sorry for themselves.

💡Stress and Anxiety

Stress and anxiety are emotional and physiological responses to perceived threats or challenges. The video identifies stress and anxiety as potential triggers for relapse, suggesting that individuals in early sobriety should learn to manage these feelings without resorting to alcohol. The speaker encourages finding healthy coping mechanisms to deal with stress and anxiety.

💡Boredom

Boredom is a state of being weary or uninterested due to a lack of stimulation. The video script mentions boredom as a potential pitfall for those in early sobriety, suggesting that individuals should find activities to keep themselves engaged and avoid the temptation to drink out of boredom. The speaker invites viewers to share their activities that help beat cravings and stay busy.

💡Lifestyle Change

A lifestyle change refers to making significant alterations in one's daily habits and routines. In the video, the speaker emphasizes that sobriety is not just about abstaining from alcohol but involves a total lifestyle change. This includes changing social circles, habits, and environments to support and maintain a sober life.

💡Overconfidence

Overconfidence is an excessive belief in one's own abilities or judgment. The video warns against overconfidence in early sobriety, as it can lead to a false sense of security and potentially result in relapse. The speaker shares examples of individuals who thought they could handle alcohol in moderation after a period of sobriety, only to end up back in the cycle of addiction.

💡Healthy Habits

Healthy habits are practices that contribute to physical, mental, and emotional well-being. The video encourages pairing sobriety with healthy habits such as exercise, a better diet, and new hobbies. These habits are presented as supportive tools for individuals to experience life soberly and to maintain their sobriety in the long term.

💡Relapse

Relapse refers to a return to addictive behavior after a period of abstinence. The video discusses the importance of being aware of the risk of relapse in early sobriety and provides strategies to avoid it. The speaker uses examples from the community's experiences to illustrate how even small steps towards sobriety can be undermined by a single moment of relapse.

Highlights

The importance of recognizing the early days of sobriety and the challenges that come with it.

The misconception that feeling better means sobriety was easy and the potential for relapse.

The influence of friends who still drink and the risk of returning to old habits.

The danger of jinxing sobriety by prematurely celebrating and announcing it.

The need to avoid places associated with drinking to prevent triggers.

The temptation to believe that having 'just one drink' will be different after a period of sobriety.

The risk of developing cross-addictions as a substitute for alcohol.

The value of pairing sobriety with healthy activities to create new, positive associations.

The challenge of boredom and the need for engaging activities to maintain focus away from alcohol.

The impact of stress on sobriety and the importance of finding healthy ways to cope.

The pitfalls of adopting a victim mentality and the empowerment of personal responsibility.

The importance of being prepared for social situations where alcohol is present.

The realization that sobriety alone does not solve all life's problems and the need for additional self-improvement.

The advice against struggling in silence and the benefits of joining support groups or online communities.

The warning against taking on too many new changes at once, which can lead to stress and potential relapse.

The encouragement to persevere in sobriety, even when progress seems slow or challenges arise.

Transcripts

all right welcome back to getting sober

again my name is Jay and today we're

going to talk about 10 things to be

aware of in early sobriety but first if

you haven't yet don't forget to give

this video a thumbs up and if you care

about your sobriety as much as we do

then make sure that you're subscribed to

this channel alright let's get started

if you're anything like me you probably

thought about getting sober at least 100

times but once you finally did get the

ball rolling you didn't know what or who

to look out for or exactly how to

maintain your sobriety so to help launch

you in the right direction let's go over

10 things to be aware of in early

sobriety the first thing to be aware of

an early sobriety is feeling better I

know that sounds weird but here's what

happens

we all get a few days sober and we start

thinking that we're feeling better and

maybe that sobriety was maybe a little

too easy or maybe that we were worried

over nothing then the thought starts

creeping back in such as maybe we'll

just drink in moderation or maybe we can

just drink on Friday night then you wind

up drinking all weekend and waking up

Monday morning hungover and counting the

seconds until it's five o'clock dot dot

dot again and slowly but surely you're

back to daily binge drinking the second

thing to be aware of in early sobriety

is your friends that still drink hanging

out with the same people that

contributed to your wild times will most

likely contribute to more wild times

your friends have no reason to cut back

on their bad habits and exposing

yourself to them too early will most

likely leave you right back to where you

started which is daily binge drinking

but the good news is that in time when

you lead by example in sobriety you

might just motivate and Inspire some of

these same friends to get sober too or

at least to maybe cut back on their own

alcohol use if they want to that is the

third thing to be aware of an early

sobriety is jinxing it don't start

thinking that after a couple of days or

even after a couple of weeks a sobriety

that you're completely sober and now

it's time to announce it to the world I

I've done it I'm sober once and for all

it's great to be proud of yourself and

you should be and you will be but

celebrating too early may lead to

thoughts that you're in complete control

of alcohol cravings and that you can

overcome any and all Temptations too

quickly I keep reading comments from

people saying things like hey I'm a two

weeks sober and I went to the bar and I

didn't drink it was really easy and

guess who I never end up hearing from

ever again I see it too often when

people get overconfident and put

themselves directly in the path of

Temptation of alcohol and the party

lifestyle remember this if you roll the

dice enough eventually You're Gonna Lose

the fourth thing to be aware of in early

sobriety is hanging out at the same

places

sobriety isn't just removing a beer can

or glass of wine from your hand it's a

total lifestyle change

alcohol is toxic and alcohol is now your

toxic EX

think about your last toxic relationship

after you broke up did you keep going to

their house did you keep going to all

the same places that you knew you were

going to see them just keep hanging out

with their friends and keep looking at

old pictures of the two of you together

no or at least I hope not some of you

definitely did

so why do the same thing with alcohol

get it out of the house stop sitting in

the parking lot at the liquor store stop

driving past the gas station that you

always grab the six pack after workout

repeat after me alcohol is my toxic X

and we broke up for a reason the fifth

thing to be aware of in early sobriety

is thinking that maybe it'll be

different now if I have a drink after

about a month of sobriety you may start

thinking that you could have a drink and

maybe it'll be different this time maybe

I can have one drink with dinner that's

responsible right having a drink with

dinner but why did you drink in the

first place because of the flavor or

because of the feeling you can convince

yourself all you want that the red Zen

pairs well with the lamb but you know

damn well that you drank it because of

the feeling and we can easily become

addicted again to anything that can give

us good feelings on demand face it we

all want to feel good but when we give

the power of feeling good over to

alcohol we are in turn power less to

create our own Joy and our own happiness

the sixth thing to be aware of in early

sobriety is other bad habits as in

picking up other bad habits to feel

better we call that cross addictions

there'll be a link to that video in the

video description down below we just

talked about wanting to feel better and

again there's nothing wrong with wanting

to feel better but be aware that feeling

better is one of the two main reasons

why people drink the first reason is to

feel better and the second reason is to

escape a lot of people that get sober

end up consuming more sugar caffeine

nicotine and even weed and then justify

it because well at least it's not

alcohol in whatever road that you take

to getting sober is up to you and always

remember that this community is no

judgment sobriety we always like to say

to give sobriety a healthy buddy or a

healthy friend like Diet exercise and

new hobbies your brain is learning how

to experience life sober I'm going to

say that again your brain is learning

how to experience life sober and why

while it's building these new

associations a great plan of action is

to pair sobriety with say exercise with

eating better staying busy starting new

hobbies or even getting back into Old

Hobbies preferably healthy ones quitting

drinking is gonna add years to your life

and wouldn't it be awesome that if

during your next family reunion or

during the holidays if you are looking

better and feeling better so much so

that you wound up inspiring your friends

and family to become the best that they

can be the seventh thing to be aware of

in early sobriety is boredom so let's do

a fun activity in the comment section

down below so you know pause the video

right now and comment down below your

own list of 10 activities that help you

to beat the Cravings stay busy and keep

your mind off of alcohol there's

definitely going to be somebody that's

new to our community and are going to be

looking for inspiration down in the

comment section down below so this will

be your opportunity to inspire them just

as maybe you have been inspired by the

Community alright pause the video right

now

all right we're back

so don't start thinking that sobriety is

going to be so hectic and dramatic as

all the dumb stuff that we did when we

were drunk it's not supposed to be and

you're not the same person anymore the

reason why getting drunk isn't fun

anymore is because you're maturing into

a better version of yourself after

reading over 10 000 comments here in

this community I've learned that some

people just don't push themselves or

challenge themselves to do more or to be

more if your life is just eat sleep work

repeat you're probably going to drive

yourself crazy who wouldn't we just

talked about giving sobriety a healthy

buddy like sports exercise a better diet

picking up new healthy Hobbies but it's

our job so remember that Idle Hands are

the enemy sitting around and watching TV

or just flipping through the news and

social media on your phone is a recipe

for extreme boredom and disaster I know

that life can seem hard at times but we

only have one life to live so make sure

that it's a life worth living and stop

saying that you're bored the eighth

thing to be aware of in early sobriety

is stress this is a huge one do not give

in to alcohol at the first sign of

Stress and Anxiety remember that Stress

and Anxiety are opportunities to learn

new Solutions other than grabbing a

bottle which then ends up just leading

to drinking yourself to the point that

you don't care anymore does that sound

familiar we always say that the gateway

to addiction is stress from whatever

pain and Trauma that you maybe had as

say a child or in a previous

relationship or maybe at your job it's

our job to find the silver linings to

look for the positives and to work on

controlling what we can control which is

our feelings our emotions and how we

respond to them and if you agree with

that don't forget to give this video a

thumbs up the ninth thing to be aware of

an early sobriety is the victim

mentality do not get caught up in the

victim mentality saying things like

everybody else gets to have fun except

for me maybe think of it this way how

come nobody else is making healthier

decisions for themselves except you

think of the money saved the

opportunities to do bigger and better

things to inspire your friends to

inspire your family to take those

vacations that you always said that you

wanted to take but could never afford

remember how you never had money to do

anything that really mattered but you

always somehow had money to get drunk

every day didn't you I know me too I'm

willing to bet that the money that you

could save in one year from alcohol and

alcohol related expenses could be enough

money for you and your family to spend a

whole week in Hawaii or maybe to go on a

cruise or to start that business that

you always talked about when you were

drunk but never did anything about it

because you're always too hungover and

tired the next day to care remember you

get sober for yourself and the bonus is

everyone else in your life gets to

benefit from your sobriety too and

before we get to the 10th and final

thing to be aware of in early sobriety

stick around because we have four extra

bonus tips for those of you in early

sobriety all right the tenth and final

thing to be aware of in early sobriety

is getting caught off guard don't get

caught off guard when people ask you how

come you're not drinking come on one

drink's not gonna hurt you can go back

to being good tomorrow own up to it

don't feel the need to dance around the

subject or feel like you're being judged

you're doing something that takes

strength and most people don't have that

strength which is why you probably don't

know anyone else who's sober take pride

in this lifestyle change that you are

making for yourself personally whenever

I feel awkward about going out to eat

and the server or the bartender asking

me if I want a beer or some wine I

always like to say this feel free to

write it down

I'm not drinking tonight so that means

more money for the tip

trust me your waiter's gonna laugh every

single time and you're probably gonna

get even better service now speaking of

tips here's a few more bonus tips for

those of you out there in early sobriety

and by the way when I say early sobriety

I mean for those of you out there that

are still like in the first three months

or so of sobriety so bonus tip number

one for early sobriety is sobriety alone

doesn't solve everything don't think

that just because you started

eliminating alcohol from your life that

everything else will be fixed too you've

made some mistakes you've probably

ruffled some feathers and I'm guessing

that you've gotten yourself probably way

off track but when we get lost we don't

stay lost when we fall down we don't do

what we don't stay down and when we get

sober it's our job to do all that we can

do to stay sober bonus tip number two

for early sobriety is don't struggle in

silence

don't have so much pride that you

wouldn't consider going to an AAA meet

or joining an online sobriety group you

could download the I am sober app for

free and find online meetings all

throughout the week and sometimes even

multiple Meetings online per day also

too we have hundreds of free sobriety

videos right here on YouTube that you

could binge watch anytime anywhere did I

mention that they're free and if you're

looking for a great book on quitting

alcohol we have a whole page on our

website with over 50 of the top books on

the topic of sobriety if you want to

browse that selection click on the link

at the top corner of this video and tip

number three for early sobriety is don't

bite off more than you can chew meaning

don't put so much on your plate yes

healthy habits included that you end up

stressing yourself out think of it like

this you need to budget for stress every

day is going to cost you a little bit of

stress and when you're stressed out

guess what happens just like a credit

card you start borrowing from energy and

from patients that you don't have and I

don't know about you but how do you act

when you're out of energy and out of

patience probably like a brat you

probably make a ton of bad decisions and

when we're maxed out on stress what do

we do we look for easy solutions like

alcohol this is especially relevant

during New Year's resolutions sobriety

is simply a tool to help you better

navigate your life but in this job of

rebuilding your own house you're going

to need more than a hammer and sobriety

will definitely be the hammer that'll

help you to nail down some of those

loose ends in your life and last but not

least bonus tip number four for those of

you in early sobriety is don't quit if

you're not where you want to be in your

sobriety Journey or any Journey keep

going if you're not seeing the physical

health benefits and the mental health

benefits then keep going if you're still

having alcohol cravings every day then

keep going they definitely become less

and less trust me be mindful of your

feelings be mindful of what's in your

control learn to let go of what's not in

your control because you are your

responsibility your health and your

emotional well-being are your

responsibility if it means limiting who

you hang out with do it if it means

passing up on what sounds like a risky

but good time definitely do it or even

if it means changing jobs or moving to a

different city then do it this is your

Montage moment in your life where you

get to be the hero of your own story and

write the next chapter word for word and

day by day are you feeling inspired yet

if so don't forget to give this video a

thumbs up and we always love hearing

from you so don't forget to leave a

comment in the comment section down

below so if you haven't done that yet

make sure that you comment down below

what your top 10 activities are to keep

your mind off of alcohol and with that I

want to wish you good luck on your

self-improvement journey and I will see

you in the next video if you want to see

another one of our videos click here

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