The Desire to Not Exist

Summary

Ce script explore le désir d'inexistence, un sentiment complexe et méconnu, souvent lié à la souffrance et à l'isolement existentiel. Il cite des œuvres littéraires et philosophiques, notamment 'Les Frères Karamazov' de Dostoïevski et 'La Maladie de la mort' de Kierkegaard, pour discuter de cette aspiration à l'absence de soi. L'analyse s'étend aux théories de Schopenhauer et de Lacan sur le désir humain et la douleur de l'individu, en se concentrant sur le personnage de Shinji de l'anime 'Neon Genesis Evangelion'. Le script examine également la relation entre le désir, la honte et la recherche d'acceptation, suggérant que l'acceptation de soi et la confiance dans les relations humaines peuvent aider à surmonter le désir d'inexistence.

Takeaways

• 🌌 Le désir de ne pas exister est un sentiment partagé par des millions de personnes, souvent lié à une évasion de la réalité plutôt qu'un souhait de mort.
• 📚 La scène du frère Karamazov illustre le débat sur l'existence de Dieu et la souffrance humaine, où l'existence dans un monde cruel pose question à la bonté de Dieu.
• 🤔 L'idée de ne pas exister est distincte de la pensée que la vie est sans sens et insoutenable; c'est un souhait psychologique complexe plutôt qu'une croyance logique.
• 🚫 Le désir de ne pas exister est influencé par la prohibition et la fantaisie, où l'impossible est souhaité davantage pour sa nature interdite.
• 🤯 Le philosophe Kierkegaard décrit la souffrance de ne pas exister comme un espoir d'éviter l'éternité, où le moi reste inchangé et la désespérance règne.
• 🎭 L'anime Neon Genesis Evangelion explore le désir de ne pas exister à travers le personnage de Shinji, qui lutte avec sa solitude existentielle et son désir d'évitement.
• 🧠 Schopenhauer soutient que la souffrance découle de l'individu distinct du monde unifié, où chaque personne a ses propres désirs et souffrances.
• 🔮 Lacan propose que le désir est une réponse au manque, où le 'Grand Autre' est un symbole de ce que nous ne pouvons jamais vraiment connaître ou satisfaire.
• 💔 La honte est liée au désir et à la perception de soi comme indigne ou non désirable, ce qui peut conduire au désir de ne pas exister.
• 🌱 Le vide et le non-être peuvent être sources de paix et de réflexion sur la valeur de l'existence, plutôt que simplement un échec à accepter la vie telle qu'elle est.
• 🛡️ Accepter le conflit entre nos désirs et ceux des autres, ainsi que la douleur potentielle du désir, est un pas en avant vers l'acceptation de soi et au-delà du désir de ne pas exister.

Q & A

Quelle est la différence entre le désir de ne pas exister et le désir de mourir?

Le désir de ne pas exister est le souhait de disparaître sans tristesse, violence ou mort, contrairement au désir de mourir qui implique la fin de la vie par la mort.

Comment le personnage Ivan Karamazov de 'Les Frères Karamazov' perçoit-il l'existence de Dieu?

Ivan Karamazov rejette la bonté de Dieu et estime que la question cruciale est de savoir si l'on veut exister dans un monde comme celui-ci, plutôt que de contempler l'existence de Dieu.

Quelle remarque célèbre d'Albert Camus est mentionnée dans le script?

Albert Camus a remarqué que, pour décider si l'on doit se tuer ou non, on répond à la question fondamentale de la philosophie.

Qu'est-ce que la dissonance cognitive et comment est-elle liée au désir de ne pas exister?

La dissonance cognitive se produit lorsqu'une personne a deux croyances contradictoires mais ne peut en incarner qu'une seule. Dans le cas du désir de ne pas exister, les gens continuent à vivre leur vie car la mort est trop difficile et finale à accepter.

Quel est l'argument de Soren Kierkegaard concernant le désir de ne pas exister?

Kierkegaard soutient que le tourment du désir de ne pas exister est le désespoir de ne même pas pouvoir mourir, la mort étant perçue comme une fin à la vie, une forme de rien.

Comment 'Neon Genesis Evangelion' traite-t-il du désir de ne pas exister?

Le personnage principal, Shinji, lutte contre son désir de ne pas exister, et l'anime explore profondément ce thème à travers les influences philosophiques d'Arthur Schopenhauer et d'autres penseurs.

Quelle est l'idée principale d'Arthur Schopenhauer concernant la souffrance et l'individualité?

Schopenhauer argue que l'individualité cause la souffrance car chaque personne a une volonté distincte et n'expérimente qu'un échantillon limité de l'univers, ce qui crée des perspectives, des désirs et des douleurs uniques.

Comment Jacques Lacan explique-t-il la formation du désir?

Lacan explique que le désir se forme en réponse à une séparation initiale et au manque. Il parle du 'grand Autre', une entité symbolique dont on cherche à comprendre les désirs pour valider notre propre désir.

Quelle est la critique d'Evangelion sur le désir et la honte?

Evangelion montre que l'obsession du désir de l'autre peut introduire des sentiments de honte et de désir de ne pas exister, car on ressent une déception profonde envers soi-même pour ne pas être désiré.

Quelle leçon peut-on tirer de l'expérience de privation sensorielle pour comprendre le désir de ne pas exister?

L'expérience de privation sensorielle peut aider à comprendre que, même si l'on ressent une paix temporaire dans un état de 'rien', il est possible de trouver du contentement dans l'existence en apprenant à accepter et à créer à partir de ce vide intérieur.

Outlines

00:00

🔮 Le désir d'inexistence

Le premier paragraphe explore le désir d'inexistence, qui est distinct de la mort ou du suicide. Il s'agit d'un état de non-expérience psychologique complexe et contradictoire, où les individus peuvent ne pas vouloir mourir mais souhaiter simplement ne pas exister. L'auteur mentionne 'Le Crime et le Châtiment' de Dostoïevski et la réflexion d'Ivan Karamazov sur l'existence de Dieu et la souffrance humaine. Il souligne également que ce désir est rarement discuté, bien qu'il soit ressenti par de nombreuses personnes. L'idée est également abordée par Albert Camus et est liée à la notion de cognitif dissonance, où les gens choisissent la croyance la plus facile à vivre, dans ce cas, la poursuite de la vie plutôt que la mort.

05:00

🤖 L'inexistence dans Neon Genesis Evangelion

Le deuxième paragraphe se concentre sur l'anime 'Neon Genesis Evangelion', qui est à première vue sur des jeunes pilotant des robots géants, mais qui est en réalité une exploration de la solitude existentielle et du désir d'inexistence du protagoniste, Shinji. L'influence du philosophe Arthur Schopenhauer est évidente, avec l'idée que l'individuité et la volonté distincte des êtres humains causent de la souffrance. L'organisation mystérieuse SEELE cherche à unifier l'humanité à travers le 'Projet d'Harmonisation Humaine', qui vise à supprimer les limites de l'ego et à créer une harmonie totale. L'auteur discute également de la théorie de Jacques Lacan sur le désir et le 'Grand Autre', qui influencent nos désirs et notre sentiment de valeur personnelle.

10:02

🧘‍♂️ L'expérience de la déprivation sensorielle

Dans le troisième paragraphe, l'auteur partage son expérience personnelle dans une baignoire de déprivation sensorielle, un environnement contrôlé où les cinq sens sont éliminés pour ressentir l'absence de sensation. Cette expérience a permis à l'auteur de comprendre le désir d'inexistence à un niveau plus profond, en se sentant comme dissous dans un espace originel sans limites. L'auteur compare cette expérience à celle de Shinji dans 'Evangelion', où il doit contempler sa valeur d'existence et son désir d'être reconnu par les autres, avant de décider de revenir dans le monde physique.

15:04

🌟 Acceptation de soi et désir d'existence

Le quatrième et dernier paragraphe aborde la question de la solution au désir d'inexistence. L'auteur suggère que l'acceptation de soi et la compréhension de nos désirs sont cruciales pour surmonter ce désir. Il insiste sur l'importance de ne pas se laisser définir par l'urgence de notre existence et de créer à partir du vide. L'auteur encourage à apprendre à décider comment nous nous sentons par rapport à nos désirs et à ce qui les cause, plutôt que de nous soumettre au jugement de ce qu'on peut appeler le 'Grand Autre'. Il met en avant l'idée que l'existence est en constante évolution et que l'acceptation mutuelle et la prise de risques pour être soi-même peuvent nous aider à dépasser le désir d'inexistence.

Keywords

💡Désir de ne pas exister

Le désir de ne pas exister est un sentiment complexe et profond qui peut être ressenti par de nombreuses personnes. Dans le script, il est décrit comme un souhait de disparaître de manière magique, sans douleur, violence ou mort, plutôt que de souhaiter la mort proprement dite. Cela illustre le thème central de la recherche de sens et la lutte contre l'absurdité de l'existence.

💡Existentialisme

L'existentialisme est une école philosophique qui se concentre sur l'existence humaine et la liberté individuelle. Dans le script, des références à des penseurs existentialistes comme Albert Camus et Søren Kierkegaard sont utilisées pour explorer les questions de l'existence et du désir de ne pas exister, soulignant comment ces idées peuvent influencer notre compréhension de la vie et de la mort.

💡Cognitive Dissonance

La cognitive dissonance est un concept psychologique qui décrit le conflit entre deux croyances ou comportements contradictoires. Le script mentionne cette notion pour expliquer pourquoi les gens qui souhaitent ne pas exister continuent de vivre, car la mort est considérée comme trop définitive et chaotique, et le désir de ne pas exister est un choix plus facile à incarner.

💡Éternité

L'éternité est un thème récurrent dans le script, notamment dans la discussion sur le désir de ne pas exister et la souffrance de l'immuable self. Kierkegaard utilise l'idée d'une éternité après la mort pour explorer le désespoir, et le script suggère que l'expérience de l'éternité dans la vie, comme dans la dépression ou la nostalgie, peut conduire à un désir de ne pas exister.

💡Neon Genesis Evangelion

Neon Genesis Evangelion est une série d'anime qui sert d'exemple dans le script pour explorer le désir de ne pas exister. Le personnage principal, Shinji, fait face à un sentiment d'isolement existentiel et doit affronter son propre désir de ne pas exister, ce qui reflète les thèmes plus larges du désir de ne pas exister et de la quête de sens.

💡Arthur Schopenhauer

Arthur Schopenhauer est un philosophe dont les idées sont discutées dans le script. Il est connu pour sa théorie selon laquelle l'individu et le monde sont séparés par leur volonté, ce qui cause de la souffrance. Cette notion est utilisée pour analyser les relations entre les personnages dans Neon Genesis Evangelion et la difficulté de surmonter la souffrance individuelle.

💡Human Instrumentality Project

Le Human Instrumentality Project est un concept clé dans Neon Genesis Evangelion, où l'objectif est de fusionner tous les êtres humains en une seule entité pour éliminer la souffrance causée par l'individualité. Le script utilise ce projet pour explorer les implications de la suppression de l'ego et la quête de l'harmonie absolue.

💡Jacques Lacan

Jacques Lacan est un psychanalyste et philosophe mentionné dans le script pour son approche de la désir et de l'Autre. Il soutient que le désir est toujours en réponse à un manque, et que le désir de l'Autre (le Big Other) influence profondément notre perception de nous-mêmes et de notre désirabilité.

💡Shame

La honte est un sentiment complexe lié au désir de ne pas exister, décrit dans le script comme une déception profonde envers soi-même pour ne pas être désiré. La honte est présente dans les expériences de Shinji dans Neon Genesis Evangelion, où il ressent de la honte pour ne pas être en accord avec les attentes et les désirs des autres.

💡Désir

Le désir est un concept central dans le script, qui est étroitement lié à la honte, à l'Autre et au désir de ne pas exister. Le script explore comment le désir peut être une source de souffrance, mais aussi comment il peut être un moteur pour la croissance et l'acceptation de soi, en dépassant le désir de ne pas exister.

Highlights

Millions or billions of people have felt the desire to not exist, which is rarely discussed.

The desire to not exist is a yearning to disappear without causing sadness, violence, or death.

Ivan Karamazov from Dostoyevsky's novel rejects notions of God's goodness and questions the desire to exist in a world full of suffering.

Albert Camus suggests that contemplating suicide answers the fundamental question of philosophy.

The desire to not exist is not about death but experiencing non-experience, a complex psychological wish.

Cognitive dissonance may lead people who wish to not exist to continue living due to the finality of death.

Søren Kierkegaard discusses the torment of the desire to not exist in 'The Sickness Unto Death'.

Desire for nothingness may be a response to the prohibition of achieving it, making the impossible more desirable.

In 'Neon Genesis Evangelion', the main character Shinji struggles with his desire to not exist.

Arthur Schopenhauer's philosophy is used to explain individual suffering due to separate wills.

The 'Human Instrumentality Project' in Evangelion aims to unify all human consciousness to eliminate suffering.

Jacques Lacan's concept of 'the big other' explains how desire forms in response to separation from others.

Desire and shame are closely linked, with shame arising from not being desired or from the fear of rejection.

Shinji's struggle in Evangelion is a reflection of the conflict between his desires and the desires of the 'big other'.

The desire to not exist can be seen as a frustration at one's individual existence and the pain of unmet desires.

Sensory deprivation tanks offer an experience of nothingness, providing insight into the desire to not exist.

Accepting oneself and one's desires, rather than seeking validation from the 'big other', can help overcome the desire to not exist.

Transcripts

it's likely that millions perhaps even

billions of people have at one point or

another felt the desire to not exist

now when i say not exist i'm not talking

about the way some people wish they had

never been born or even somebody's

self-destructive fantasies no the desire

to not exist is the yearning to

magically disappear preferably in a way

that doesn't require any sadness

violence or death

you may know it as the wish to fall

asleep and never wake up again

as often as this desire is felt it's

mysteriously rarely discussed

what i found surrounding why we

sometimes feel this way says a lot about

the nature of our existence desires and

how we interpret the existence of others

and one of the most memorable scenes

from dostoyevsky's novel the brothers

karamazov a monk and an atheist walk

into a bar

their brothers qaramazov to be exact

what ensues is a debate about the

existence of god albeit an

unconventional one

in our world nobody escapes the torture

of daily pains and disappointment even

children suffer in horrific extremes

thus god the elder of the two brothers

maintains must be evil to have

introduced us to such a world any

promises of paradise after this life are

just taunts

life is about a cruel angel's thesis

it's not that i don't accept god

i just most respectfully return him the

ticket he says

ivan karmaza rejects all notions of

god's goodness but even further than

that we can interpret that for ivan it

is not so important to contemplate

whether or not god exists the question

that must be asked is whether or not we

want to exist in a world like this one

this idea would be repeated by albert

camus who famously made the remark that

in deciding whether or not one should

kill oneself one answers the fundamental

question of philosophy

when we think of the desire to not exist

we usually imagine something akin to

this kind of thinking the idea that life

is meaningless and insufferable is a

popular one

however when compared to these outlooks

the desire to not exist is unique

what these individuals desire is not

death but to experience non-experience

the desire is not a logical set of

beliefs about the characteristics of

life but a complex psychological wish

furthermore not everyone who longs for

nothingness thinks existence is entirely

unbearable

to not want to die but also wanting to

simply not exist implies a contradictory

hope that one might continue to go on

living

i think the most tempting way to explain

this is to bring up what is called

cognitive dissonance when a person has

two contradictory beliefs but can only

embody one of them they will pick the

one that is easier to exhibit in this

case it's easy to suggest that the

people who would like to not exist

continue to live their lives because

death is much too messy and final it

takes a certain dedication to accept

death

of course there is something to be said

for this idea after all most people

would hesitate to see death as a

solution to their problems but this

outlook of cognitive dissonance ignores

the intense feeling these individuals

still experience

not to mention the ways they'll still

attempt to replicate nothingness in

their own lives

one way of reading this contradiction is

that it is prohibition that leads to

fantasy we desire that which we cannot

have

not only is nothingness impossible we're

told that we must not achieve it

we might therefore desire nothingness

simply as a way to exert our freedom

the impossible is desired all the more

for its impossibility

one of the best references to the desire

to not exist can be found in the

philosopher soren kierkegaard's book the

sickness unto death

kierkegaard's argument is that the

torment of the desire to not exist is

the hopelessness of not even being able

to die

death means an end to life a perceived

nothingness though not a sickness that

will literally end in death once a more

horrifying reality than death is

encountered one will wish they could die

when even this last respite is taken

from them the desire to disappear will

consume them in an act that kierkegaard

calls despair

but as we've already discussed those

that suffer from the desire to not exist

don't exactly want to die kierkegaard a

deeply religious thinker thought of

despair as a response to the eternity

that lies after death

by replacing his mentions of death with

the idea of nothingness we lose

something from his writings but even if

we disassemble this part of his argument

the most fascinating portion still

remains

there exists even in life simulated

perceptions of eternity when time is

slowed to a crawl and every monotonous

day bleeds out in unity we are held a

hostage of eternity

boredom depression and nostalgia all

linger here

but some of the less familiar residents

of non-time also deserve a mention the

delirious ache of desire is felt here

and it is also in the silence of

eternity that we catch our glimpse of

nothingness eternity is important to

kierkegaard's argument because it

preserves everything he says a

despairing person wishes they could be

freed from

it's an eternity that the self remains

immutable that's exactly what can be so

dreadful about it

a self is a heavy burden

during the total cease fire of time the

inability to escape from ourselves grows

ever more prominent under the right

conditions that can be its own form of

suffering

[Music]

at a first glance the anime neon genesis

evangelion appears to be about angsty

teens piloting giant robots as they

fight otherworldly entities referred to

as angels

but in reality the show is about one 14

year old boy's fight with his desire to

not exist

of course spoilers ahead

each of the main characters suffers from

an intense existential loneliness

however it's in shinji a character

modeled after the anime's creator that

we find the show's depiction of this

desire

episode 16 is even titled the sickness

unto death in reference to kierkegaard

ava isn't shy about naming its

philosophical influences by explicitly

using philosophy neon genesis evangelion

presents us with an interesting

existential argument

in order to understand that argument we

need to take a look at the ideas of the

philosopher arthur schopenhauer another

one of the anime's major influences

in his book the world as will and

representation schopenhauer describes

the way individuality can cause

suffering he argues that the world is

made up of will and representation while

the total universe is in fact one thing

operating in unity human beings each

have their own will distinct from that

of the universe and each other

furthermore each person only experiences

a limited sample of the total universe

causing them to have their own unique

perspectives longings and pains

deschopenhauer as long as human beings

exist separately from one another there

will be suffering this dilemma is

portrayed countless times in evangelion

as the main cast of characters

repeatedly struggled to deal with the

pain inherent to the process of becoming

close to another person

ava doesn't just stop here though the

shadowy organization zela german for

soul seeks the literal unification of

all human life through what is called

the human instrumentality project

the project is intended to destroy the

boundaries of our egos and allow for

total harmony as each person's

consciousness is merged into one total

unit

don't leave me

don't ignore me

don't kill me

what the hell is this

this apocalyptic event will unite all

minds hearts and bodies as one in the

movie end of evangelion after the human

instrumentality project is unwittingly

put into motion by shinji we're

presented with a surreal commentary on

the psychology of those who desire

nothingness

help me

please oscar you're the only one for me

you're lying

you know you are you'd run up to anyone

you're afraid of misato and rey you're

afraid of your father and your mother

it's just that now you're only running

to me

it's the easiest and late painful thing

to do come on oscar help me the truth is

you've never really loved anybody the

psychoanalyst and philosopher jacques

lacroix suggested that her desires form

in response to our separation from one

another

le cor often discussed the existence of

something called the other

we can understand his mentions of the

other in two ways first as someone who

is not you

second as the big other a more ignomatic

character

the big others essential feature is that

we struggle to know what it desires

despite our persistent efforts to find

out

the big other is not a person parser

it is a symbol a category

all desire forms in response to some

lack in our lives

all desire fundamentally presupposes

other desires

and all desire craves recognition the

khan's argument is that your desire

comes from your best guess as to what

the big other lacks or desires

the big other is always present in the

mind it's imagined presence leading you

to wonder if your desire is acceptable

and more importantly if you as you

define yourself are a desirable person

schopenhauer saw the individual will of

the self as a pointless striving with no

end

to him only suffering arises from our

wants because our wants can only stem

from an initial dissatisfaction

this also applies to what lacal is

saying here about desire

there are many ways one's desire might

repel others and it is always a fact

that we never truly comprehend what the

other desires from us

the burden of desire easily finds itself

implicated alongside pain

evangelion makes a very important point

that obsessing over the desire of the

other can introduce feelings of shame

ending and the desire to not exist

shame is a deep disappointment with

oneself for not being desired a feeling

that the whole self isn't valid

yet it can only be felt before something

of an audience even if it's an imagined

one

in shame we view ourselves from an

exterior perspective that of the big

other

the desire of the big other isn't as

simple a matter as merely doing what

other people want from us it's about

wanting the thing other people want

shinji is afraid that he has no

desirable qualities other than being the

pilot of his eva and to be fair he's not

so far off he's let the demands of other

people dominate him demands that stem

from their own unresolved issues

visado wants shinji to be what she could

never be asaka wants him to be less

apologetic in pursuing her and by the

end of it all it's still not really

clear what his father desires of him

notorious is the dynamic that plays out

as a result

shinji thrashes about an indecision

hesitant to pilot his eva knowing the

pain it will cause him but nonetheless

wanting to please others

he's told to only do it if he wants to

which is really just a more severe way

of being told to do it and enjoy it

the presentation of a choice here is

really an illusion

all this culminates into the conflict of

shinji's own desires as they bite and

cower at the desire of the big other

in certain scenes and through certain

responses we see that shinji is a shame

that his desires are not those of the

others

one can think life is full of good and

still not want to fully take part in it

rebelling against all existence he

thinks he has acquired evidence against

existence against its goodness the

despairer thinks that he himself is this

evidence

acting against what we desire or feeling

disgust at what we desire both lead to

shame

both involve a sensitivity to the big

other desire always plays some sort of a

role in shame because the true nature of

our wants constitutes a fundamental part

of the self

despair over something such as rejection

really is despair over having a self

rights kierkegaard i believe the desire

to not exist can be understood as an

expression of frustration at one's

individual existence

despair rages in each of us as we

acknowledge the truth that we are not

one but rejection especially bruises

those who desperately want to be desired

these persons who suffer from the desire

to not exist really want to have no

desires to experience the freedom and

peace of a complete dissolution of the

self as it is known

we will never be one but after i cease

all striving forward perhaps i can numb

the pain inflicted on me by my neglected

desires

everything that matters to me matters in

this world and that's the precise reason

i find it all so tiring

the cold anesthesia of nothingness is

the nuclear option for desire

this attitude of distance is fully

displayed in the behaviors tied to the

desire to not exist

there's just one more thing i wanted to

understand

what's the solution

in order to figure that out i first

thought it necessary to get as close as

possible to actually experiencing

nothingness myself

sensory deprivation tanks are pods of

saltwater that work to eliminate each of

the five senses

in them there's no light sound or

gravity in order to experience what

nothing this is like i decided to jump

into one of these things

after setting up an appointment at a

place that offered these i step in and

begin to float

the lights turn off and slowly my world

is ending

finally only i remain

there is nothing

only warm primordial blackness

my body is sleek from the salt the water

feels as if it expands out infinitely

my limbs grow heavy in the darkness my

eyes project forth the after images of

meaningless shapes and colors that i

spend some time assembling into coherent

objects

my time in that pod felt both

instantaneous and infinite almost like a

dream

when it did end stepping out of the

darkness i felt as if i was emerging

from an imaginary space deep within

myself

and yet i found that the peace i

experienced there did not make me hate

existence

i rather felt content with it

in episode 20 of evangelion shinji is

dissolved into a primordial soup inside

of his mecca with only his consciousness

remaining

kind of like me here

given the choice to remain in the state

of nothingness or to return to the

physical world he contemplates his

self-worth

we're again introduced here to the fact

that shinji determines the value of his

existence through how desirable he is to

others

we are to understand however the

solution that is proposed here as it is

this that ultimately influences shinji

desire to return to the real world

it's your future only you can decide

shinji

you must make a choice

off philosophy is in some way an

interpretation of the philosopher's own

experiences

sensory deprivation although not as

surreal an experience as to what shinji

goes through here helped me to

understand that there is yet another way

to imagine ourselves returning life the

ticket

we do not need to allow the immediacy of

our existence to define us

we can learn to create out of the void

that we yearn to return to

we all have the ability to go from

feeling a mixture of pleasure and guilt

in our desire to feeling secure in the

thing that propels our desire

i believe that part of this process is

learning to decide for ourselves how we

feel about our desires and what causes

them instead of presenting ourselves to

be judged by a jury of our own conjuring

we must understand that everything in

this life is in the constant state of

becoming

all people will continue to grow closer

and farther from each other in an

endless a variety of ways

in our simulated eternities we fear that

we will always be prone to repeat the

same mistakes to desire the same things

and to always be the disgusting person

we are now

if we trust in the idea that even the

absurd is possible we can instead push

forward to carve out opportunities for

our acceptance

shame arises when we trust in the big

other to decide what is acceptable for

us

but the actual people in our lives while

they might not always agree with what we

desire still have the chance to accept

us if we trust them

friction will always exist between what

they want and what we want

accept that and you can take the risk to

be accepted yourself

in taking that risk and accepting the

potential pains of desire you'll already

have made steps towards accepting

yourself

and moved beyond the desire to not exist

if you enjoyed this video you'll

absolutely love my video on the game

with a perfect portrayal of trauma