Be Easy to Be With BUT Hard to Get.

Summary

In this intimate video, the creator candidly discusses various aspects of life, from parenting to self-love and relationships, all while her daughter naps in the car. She shares how becoming a parent has deepened her respect and connection with her husband and emphasizes the importance of self-care for mothers. The video also touches on maintaining feminine energy post-children, the challenges of finding reliable help, and the dynamics of attraction in relationships. Sponsored by BetterHelp, the creator highlights the benefits of online therapy for those facing life's uncertainties, including the fear of motherhood and relationship issues.

Takeaways

• 👨‍👧 Parenting has a profound impact on relationships, often leading to a deeper respect and appreciation for one's partner as a parent.
• 🤔 The concept of 'black cat energy' refers to being independent and desirable, which can coexist with motherhood and femininity.
• 💕 Self-love can manifest in various forms throughout life, such as prioritizing oneself and one's ambitions, especially in the context of work and personal growth.
• 👶 Having children can lead to personal transformation, including increased career success and self-awareness, contrary to societal fears of losing oneself.
• 🏠 The desire for a better living situation can be motivated by redirecting one's ambitions and celebrating achievements, making the partner feel valued and appreciated.
• 📚 The speaker believes in astrology as it relates to astronomy and planetary movements, but not in the generalizations found in horoscopes.
• 👫 Men test women to ascertain their value and boundaries, seeking a partner who is 'hard to get' as it signifies a sense of achievement.
• 💌 To convey the seriousness of a situation to a partner, actions speak louder than words; disengagement and lack of reaction can be more impactful than lengthy messages.
• 🏡 Breaking the cycle of generational poverty involves leveraging one's strengths, possibly through content creation or teaching, and adopting an abundant mindset.
• 👩‍❤️‍👨 The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-love and authenticity in romantic relationships, suggesting that being a 'golden retriever' or chaser is unattractive.
• 👀 The fear of motherhood is a common concern, but overcoming it requires personal experience, as societal worries often don't reflect the reality of parenthood.

Q & A

How has parenting impacted the speaker's relationship with her husband?

Parenting has deepened the speaker's respect and appreciation for her husband. She admires his fatherly qualities and feels healed from her own childhood experiences without a father figure. However, it has also led to less time together as they both focus on raising their children.

What is the speaker's current form of self-love?

The speaker's current form of self-love is prioritizing herself in her work, particularly in writing her book and doing her job. It's not about indulgent activities like bubble baths or manicures, but about putting herself first in her professional pursuits.

What does the speaker mean by 'black cat energy'?

The 'black cat energy' refers to a woman being independent and desirable, akin to being chased by a man. The speaker argues that having children doesn't diminish one's feminine energy or desirability, and one can still embody the essence of a 'black cat' even after becoming a mother.

How long did the speaker date her husband before getting married?

The speaker met her husband in 2012 and got engaged in 2013, indicating a relatively short period of dating before deciding to marry.

What challenges does the speaker face in finding help around the house?

The speaker finds it difficult to find someone she trusts with her children and who is also available and reliable. She emphasizes the importance of finding someone of sound mind and good character, which she finds more challenging than finding a romantic partner.

What advice does the speaker give for maintaining a woman's attractiveness when she likes a man?

The speaker advises women to avoid behaving like a 'golden retriever', or being overly eager and chasing after a man, as it can be unattractive. Instead, she suggests maintaining 'black cat energy', being hard to get but easy to be around, which she believes is more appealing to men.

How does the speaker feel about her body after having children?

Contrary to her pre-motherhood worries, the speaker likes her body more now than before. She feels more connected and appreciative of her body post-pregnancy.

What is the speaker's perspective on career success post-motherhood?

The speaker has experienced more career success after becoming a mother. She attributes this to having more to say and a grounded energy, as well as being motivated by the need to provide for her children.

What is the speaker's view on BetterHelp and its role in sponsoring her content?

The speaker is grateful to BetterHelp for sponsoring her content, as it allows her to create more material and support her family. She appreciates BetterHelp's platform for its convenience and the ease of switching therapists if needed.

How does the speaker suggest getting someone to understand that it's their last chance with you?

The speaker recommends showing through actions rather than words. She suggests disengaging, not giving energy or reactions to the person's behavior, and making them feel that they will lose you if they continue with their actions.

What advice does the speaker offer for dealing with a man who teases you like a brother?

The speaker advises trying to genuinely show hurt feelings if the teasing continues after attempts to ignore or politely ask for it to stop. She suggests expressing genuine upset without yelling, to make the person aware of the impact of their words.

How can a person motivate their spouse to have more ambition and desire for life achievements?

The speaker suggests redirecting the spouse's ambitions towards shared goals, making them feel appreciated for what they've already achieved, and subtly inspiring them by making them think it's their idea to pursue more.

What is the speaker's stance on astrology?

The speaker believes in the science behind astronomy and planetary movements but does not believe in the personalized predictions found in newspapers or horoscopes, especially considering the complexities of tropical and sidereal signs.

How does the speaker define femininity and its power?

The speaker defines femininity as a source of power that goes beyond traditional 9-to-5 jobs or becoming a lawyer. She believes in the ability of women to create and monetize their skills, especially through content creation and teaching.

What advice does the speaker give for dealing with codependency and learning to love spending time alone?

The speaker recommends her own book, 'The New Rules', as a resource for learning to fall in love with oneself. She suggests treating oneself as one would treat a loved one or a child, which can be a pivotal and life-changing approach.

Why do men test women according to the speaker?

Men test women to determine their value and boundaries. The speaker believes that men want a valuable partner and testing is a way for them to feel like winners in life, having acquired the best they could get.

How can a single mother from a family with a history of poverty build sustainable wealth?

The speaker suggests leveraging one's femininity and talents to create content and offer courses or teaching. She also emphasizes the importance of breaking down barriers and adopting an abundant mindset, emulating the behaviors of wealthy individuals.

Outlines

00:00

👨‍👧 Parenting and Relationship Dynamics

The speaker discusses how becoming a parent in 2020 and again in 2023 significantly changed her relationship with her partner. She expresses newfound respect and appreciation for her husband's parenting skills, which have healed parts of her that she didn't grow up with her father around. Despite the busy nature of their lives, she feels a deeper connection with her husband, especially in their shared love and excitement for their children. The speaker emphasizes the beauty of a couple loving a child together and wanting the best for them.

05:03

💆‍♀️ Self-Love Practices and Feminine Energy

The speaker shares her current self-love practices, which revolve around prioritizing herself and her work, including writing a book. She explains that self-love is not always about indulgent activities but can be about making sure one's needs are met, especially in the context of being a mother. She also addresses the concept of 'black cat energy,' which is about being independent and desirable, and argues that having children does not diminish one's feminine energy. Instead, she believes that femininity and motherhood can coexist, and having children can even enhance one's desirability.

10:03

👶 Overcoming Fear of Motherhood and Life Changes

The speaker talks about her own fears of becoming a mother and how those fears were both valid and unfounded. She explains that the experience of motherhood is life-changing and cannot be fully understood until one goes through it. She encourages those who are afraid of the changes motherhood might bring, such as loss of free time or body changes, to face their fears head-on. The speaker shares her personal growth since becoming a mother, including career success and a deeper understanding of herself, and advises that life is short and should be experienced to the fullest.

15:03

🔄 Addressing Relationship Concerns and Behaviors

The speaker provides advice on various relationship issues. She suggests that to get a man to understand that it's the last chance, one should disengage rather than sending long paragraphs. She also addresses how to handle a man who teases like a brother, recommending expressing genuine hurt rather than trying to control his behavior. Additionally, she discusses strategies for motivating a husband to have more ambition and dreams, emphasizing the importance of redirecting his ambitions to align with shared goals and celebrating his achievements.

20:05

🌟 Embracing Femininity, Astrology, and Personal Growth

The speaker discusses her belief in astrology and astronomy, acknowledging the influence of planetary movements but expressing skepticism about daily horoscopes. She encourages women to embrace their femininity and not to compare themselves to men in terms of work and capabilities. The speaker also touches on the topic of generational poverty and building sustainable wealth, suggesting that single mothers can use their time and talents to create income through content creation and teaching. She ends with advice on becoming comfortable with spending time alone and the importance of self-love, recommending her book 'The New Rules' for those struggling with codependency.

Keywords

💡Feminine Energy

Feminine energy in the context of the video refers to the inherent qualities traditionally associated with women, such as nurturing, sensitivity, and intuition. The video discusses how having children can enhance a woman's feminine energy, rather than diminish it. For example, the speaker mentions that being a mother can make one more desirable and feminine, challenging the notion that having kids reduces one's feminine appeal.

💡Parenting

Parenting is a central theme in the video, where it is described as a transformative experience that has positively impacted the speaker's relationship with her husband. It is portrayed as a journey that brings couples closer together and deepens their mutual respect and excitement for their shared family life. The speaker shares how witnessing her husband as a father has healed parts of her and strengthened their bond.

💡Self-Love

Self-love in the video is presented as a practice that evolves throughout one's life and is currently manifested through the speaker's dedication to her work and the publication of her book. It is not about superficial self-care like manicures or bubble baths, but rather about prioritizing one's own needs and happiness, especially in the context of being a mother. The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-love as a means to avoid depletion and resentment in relationships.

💡Black Cat Energy

The term 'Black Cat Energy' is used metaphorically in the script to describe a woman's allure and independence, qualities that make her sought after by men. The video challenges the idea that having children diminishes this energy, asserting that femininity and desirability can coexist with motherhood. The speaker encourages maintaining this energy by being 'hard to get but easy to be around,' even after having children.

💡BetterHelp

BetterHelp is mentioned as the sponsor of the video content. It is an online platform that connects individuals with therapists, facilitating access to mental health support. The video highlights the convenience of BetterHelp's services, such as the ability to switch therapists seamlessly and engage in therapy from the comfort of one's home, which is particularly beneficial for busy parents.

💡Golden Retriever

In the video, 'Golden Retriever' is used as a metaphor to describe a person who is overly eager to please or impress someone they are attracted to, often at the expense of their own authenticity. The speaker advises against this behavior, suggesting that it is more attractive to maintain one's independence and allure ('Black Cat Energy') rather than becoming too available or desperate.

💡Fear of Motherhood

The fear of motherhood is addressed as a common concern that the speaker encourages overcoming by actually embracing the experience of becoming a mother. The video emphasizes that fears are unfounded until one faces them and that motherhood can lead to personal growth, career success, and a deeper understanding of oneself, contrary to societal fears and misconceptions.

💡Codependency

Codependency is discussed in the context of being uncomfortable with spending time alone and the need to develop self-love and independence. The speaker suggests that codependent individuals can benefit from learning to enjoy their own company, which is a key theme in her book 'The New Rules.' The video encourages self-reflection and self-improvement as a means to overcome codependency.

💡Astrology

Astrology is briefly touched upon in the video, with the speaker expressing a belief in the influence of planetary movements and astronomy, but not in the typical horoscope readings found in newspapers. The speaker questions the accuracy of sun sign-based predictions, given the existence of tropical and sidereal zodiac systems, and the additional layer of moon signs.

💡Generational Poverty

Generational poverty is discussed as a challenge that the speaker has personal experience with, being from a family of single mothers. The video suggests that breaking the cycle of poverty involves creating an abundant mindset and leveraging one's strengths and talents to generate income. The speaker hints at the idea of monetizing skills through content creation and teaching others.

Highlights

Parenting has deepened the speaker's respect and appreciation for her partner, enhancing their relationship.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-love and prioritizing oneself, especially in the context of being a working mother.

Maintaining feminine energy and the 'black cat' allure is possible even after having children, challenging traditional perceptions.

The speaker shares her journey of meeting her husband, getting engaged, and married, providing insight into their relationship timeline.

Finding reliable help for childcare and household tasks is a significant challenge the speaker has faced.

The analogy of being a 'golden retriever' versus a 'black cat' in romantic relationships to illustrate the importance of maintaining one's authenticity and allure.

Overcoming the fear of becoming a mother by embracing the experience and understanding its life-changing impact.

The speaker's personal growth and career success after becoming a mother, contradicting common societal worries about motherhood.

BetterHelp's sponsorship of the video allows the speaker to create content and emphasizes the importance of therapy in personal development.

The effectiveness of non-verbal communication and disengagement in conveying the seriousness of one's intentions in a relationship.

Addressing the issue of a partner's teasing by expressing genuine hurt and setting boundaries.

Inspiring and redirecting a partner's ambitions to align with shared goals, such as moving out of an apartment to a home.

The speaker's belief in astrology as it relates to astronomy and the influence of planetary movements on human life.

Encouraging single mothers to leverage their femininity and talents to create sustainable wealth and break the cycle of poverty.

The importance of developing an abundant mindset and emulating the behaviors of wealthy individuals to achieve financial success.

Men's tendency to test women to gauge their value and establish their own sense of achievement in a relationship.

The speaker's commitment to creating content that celebrates femininity and empowers women to embrace their unique strengths.

Transcripts

here we are in my garage my car is here

my daughter is asleep inside so it's a

perfect opportunity for us to have our

deep and meaningful one of our dnm's one

of our amazing videos that are luckily

sponsored by better help which I will

mention more as we go on but the reason

I can bring you this content is better

help sponsors it and they are lovely for

doing so right let's get into the video

this video is about your questions

feminine energy relationships all of it

is going to be addressed in this video

the reason I'm on my phone is because I

am pulling up my questions from

you which we need to answer here they

are let's go through

them and see how long my daughter sleeps

in the car she always falls asleep in

the car now she used to hate the car but

here we are we

moved we feel better about life in

general cheers how has parenting changed

your

relationship parenting has changed my

relationship first in 2020 and then it

changed my relationship again in

2023

parenting

look it changes your relationship in the

form of the fact that you start to

really respect I respect my partner my

husband so much more than I did before

him as a father is everything that I've

ever dreamed about having as a child

I didn't grow up with my father as a

child and just watching him parent has

healed so many parts of me that I knew

needed it but it's just been an

incredible journey to watch him as a

parent I respect him more I value him

more but we have very little time

together we are not like passing ships

in the night but we are like both

running like hamsters on Wheels trying

to look after the two children trying to

make it all happen so but but there is

something about it that's you know

people always romanticize romance but I

like to romanticize life because this is

a very short period of time that we are

going to be in the situation together

him and I I think the most beautiful

thing is to have a husband or a wife or

whoever it is for you and both equally

love a child together and want the best

thing for them and when you call them

and you're like oh my God little Timmy

said something you know they're equally

as excited and there's no one in this

world who's as excited as

you so if anything it's heightened my

relationship with him I know a lot of

people experience the opposite of you

know feeling like they're not connected

to their partner anymore but I don't I

don't feel that I feel quite the

opposite so that's nice how do you

incorporate self- Lov practices in

day-to-day

life your life and your self-love is

going to change at different times in

your life okay for me at the moment

self- l is the publication of my book

selflove is putting myself first when it

comes to doing things I want to do for

work it does not come in in the form of

I don't know nails and a spray tan

although that would be nice to have a

spray tan wouldn't it but self love for

me comes in the form of putting myself

first when it comes to work I've always

wanted to do the job I do and as much as

I know that it would be beneficial for

my children to have their mom 247 I give

myself time to do my job and to write my

book and to do the launch event and to

do all these things and create product

for things I believe in because I

believe what I'm creating is important

so that's my form of self- Lov my form

of self- Lov is not bubble baths or

manicures at the moment it was that at a

certain time but not right now so it

just depends what it is and if you need

that selflove you need to prioritize it

but understand it's not always the

frilly and fluffy things how to keep the

black cat energy going after kids this

is a really funny one because everybody

asks me about this black cat energy but

some people have a response in saying oh

we don't like the black cat energy

Theory but anyway black cat energy is

being chased by your man okay because

you're black cat you're like you know

independent you're doing your own thing

I don't really understand why people

confuse having kids as something that

makes your feminine energy go down if

anything we need to understand and

celebrate the fact that femininity and

being a feminine woman and being a black

cat or being a woman that men Chase is

partially to do with having kids too

like you can have children and be

feminine the two go together if you

think about it it's not like it stops

and I think maybe I come from an Eastern

European culture and back when my mom

had kids she had me at 20 kids one kid

20 and everybody did at the time so

there's something to be said about the

fact that having a child and being

desirable weren't mutually exclusive so

for me being a black cat and being a

mama cat is not different like you can

still be sexy or sensual or the essence

of being a black cat and I would put it

this way is being hard to get but being

easy to be around so if you prioritize

yourself if you put yourself first if

you make yourself happy first then you

can put into other people never go out

of your way especially as a mother you

need to replenish yourself first to make

other people happy because what makes us

feel really cornered and what makes us

feel really unhappy in life is when we

put our family first and we become so

depleted so energetically drained and

then we resent them and hate them for it

that is the big problem so make sure

that you're putting yourself first even

with kids how long did you date your

husband before marriage I met him in

2012

in September and I got engaged in

2013 yeah and we got married pretty soon

after so yeah do you have a helper

around the house listen you know how you

guys watch my content or listen to my

stuff because you feel I've got a handle

on maybe interpersonal relationships

male and female Dynamics I have read and

listened about male female Dynamics a

lot I feel like like I've got something

to give if there was a channel on

finding helpers nannies and help in

general I would be watching that I I

think it's it's easier to find a man

that it is to find a nanny I've had it's

really hard I find it really hard to one

of two things find somebody who I feel

confident in leaving my children around

because who is that person like how do

you know them how do you know that

they're of sound mind that they're nice

like you know how do you know from just

meeting them but secondly availability

timings can they can they not when you

do find someone then they can't it's

just hot mess Express somebody said

having a child is like having your heart

walk outside your body and the question

is it's like who would you trust your

heart with it's like a vital organ you

know so I have somebody who I really

really like unfortunately she can only

do it once a week but that is when

unlike today I

usually record my podcast but you know

my kids still want me primarily why when

you like someone you're the golden

retriever and when you don't you're the

black cat I think when you like somebody

you are the golden retriever because you

start going outside of your authenticity

in order to impress them and that is why

the the golden retriever is unattractive

when it's a woman being the golden

retriever or the Chaser we are

unattractive as the Chaser because we

have a lot of desperate and anxious

energy when we like someone and we start

to chase them it's much better to let

him be the Chaser because it brings out

positive masculine energy traits like

pursuing you like planning dates like

creating things and we find that

attractive whilst when you like a guy

and you start doing your masculine

traits which is the golden retriever

traits it makes you unattractive to him

that is why you must wrestle yourself

emotionally and not be the golden

retriever and keep being the black cap

because what is attractive about a woman

is her feminine essence which she must

maintain to keep being attractive to him

so it is annoying but it is the truth

that you must maintain your black cat

chased energy when you like a guy

because he's going to want to win you

over and if you close the gap it's going

to ruin it how can I lose the fear of

becoming a

mother you can lose the fear of becoming

a mother by having a child that is the

only way you can lose your fear of

anything you can't lose a fear of

anything until you walk through it

straight through the fear and into the

unknown I was if you speak to my closest

friend uh petrified of becoming a mom

before I became one and I will tell you

that it was both valid and completely

invalid at the same time in terms of the

fact that I was worried about the wrong

things it's not something that you can

experience until you experience it it's

the most pivotal life-changing

experience and I'm not saying that if

you don't have children you can't have

pivotal life-changing experiences but

this is one that you have to do to

understand it's one of the three pivotal

relationships in life you as a child to

your parents that formly shapes you you

know no matter what that relationship

was even if you never had Parents

growing up or even if you were very

close to your parents it shapes you you

always refer to your parental

relationship in some way then it's your

spouse or relationship or the partner

that you might have or partners that you

might have and then it's you as the

parent to your children so it's one of

those three formative relationships and

it changes you as a human being also a

friend who's close can change you too so

the fears you have are not founded

because you have no idea what that

experience is like it's like being

scared to have parents yes it's scary to

love and it's scary to like I said it's

like your heart walking outside your

body but if you are scared of of

motherhood in terms of free time in

terms

of body change es in terms of all that

jazz if that's what you mean the

societal uh worries about motherhood I

will tell you this me personally I have

had more Career Success uh more

knowledge of myself more connectedness

to who I am after having children but

that might not be you I'm just saying me

so if you feel like you're going to lose

yourself or lose some part of you or

lose something then that might happen I

don't know but I was worried about that

I was worried about body changes not

that I even had like a body that I was

like so in love with like oh I've got

the perfect body and it's going to get

ruined but you just get worried I like

my body now more than I did before I'm

not saying it's better but I like it

more

now I my career is 500 times better than

it was I'm a person who I've decided

gets motivated by these tiny beings who

I need to take care of I will move

mountains trust and believe I will move

mountains to make these people happy I

don't feel the same way about myself you

need to look back onto how you were

raised and what motivational aspects you

have me I do a lot for other people in

terms of not in a not in a martydom way

not like me I do a lot for other people

but what motivates me is others some

people are motivated by self I'm

motivated by others so career-wise I've

done way more since having my son

because he came first in

2020 I have more grounded energy I feel

I've got more to

say it's hard I would like to go to the

bathroom by

myself it's

scary but it's worth it life in general

here I go getting real and dark again

life in general is

scary it's so fleeting and so quick but

I want to experience it to the fullest

so don't be scared if you want it do it

and if you don't don't brings me on to

the sponsor of this video I am so

grateful for better heal for sponsoring

this video because it allows me to

create more content and feed these

children that I'm passionately in love

with but honestly thank you better help

if you want to check out better help

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for sponsoring this video ooh I love

this one how to get him to understand

that this is the last chance without

sending him

paragraphs literally the opposite of

what you just said the way you get

somebody to understand that this is the

last chance with you is not by sending

paragraphs it's what you do not what you

say if you truly felt this was the last

chance and you are bored by someone

which I told you 100 times again and

again and again if you really want him

to change you need to be bored of him as

opposed to engaged by his behavior

enraged by his behavior and like

reactive to his behavior you need to get

bored that's what makes men change okay

lack of energy towards them lack of

interaction with them disregard to them

that's what makes them change okay

because wherever energy flows they feel

it's still worth it sometimes men do

things just to get a reaction out of you

trust and believe

okay and what I'm saying is if you want

him to know that this is the last chance

you need to disengage no long paragraphs

you need to say look this behavior is

really made me feel put off by you I'm

pretty much done happens again I'm

completely done and you need to not

engage in that you need to not interact

with him much you need to not give him

more than he's giving you he needs to

know that he's going to lose you if he

keeps doing it energetically but we as

women do the opposite we get engaged we

really get attached to this idea of what

he's doing we start micromanaging him

controlling him mothering him he's

sitting there rubbing his hands I've

really got her now because he has got

you if you're writing paragraphs you're

not done you're very much not done he's

very much winning what to do if a guy

constantly teases you like a brother

I've tried ignoring and asking nicely

okay

listen if it's hurting your feelings

genuinely and I always say be honest to

your feelings if you're in the feminine

and he says look at you you tell tubby

right let's say he's teasing you like a

brother maybe that's the dynamic he has

with a sister you've tried ignoring it

which is what I would advise first but

you've done that you tried asking nicely

I wouldn't advise that but you've tried

that the next thing is to get genuinely

hurt oh look at you Telly tubby you look

at him and you look down and you're hurt

maybe you

cry whatever it takes get very upset get

upset don't yell at him but go go sit in

the corner for a while be like I don't

want to go out today you said I look

like a chubby and now it's upset

me be genuine to your feelings if he's

just somebody who likes to do brother

Jabs and you don't like it he'll stop

and if he's a mean mean mama jamama then

maybe he's not the one for you how to

motivate my husband to want more in life

Ambitions dream dreams

achievement ready to move out same

person to an actual home tired of

apartment life how to make it happen if

you are married to someone you like and

you want to motivate them you need to

redirect their Ambitions to yours so if

they're an ambitious person and they've

got

ideas you need to question why they have

those ideas as opposed to going no I

don't want you to buy this car I want

this car or I don't want that apartment

I want a home like she

mentions you need to start inspiring

them how to inspire somebody you need to

make him think it's his idea you need to

think you need to be like what kind of

home would you want You' always seemed

like a guy who would buy a home you

would be so amazing as the man of the

house I don't know as as corny as that

sounds to you it sounds corny but it's

not corny to men they buy that stuff

they really believe it you need to start

saying oh remember you said you wanted

that didn't you mean you actually wanted

a home you need to start redirecting his

ideas you need to also start celebrating

what he does do oh my God I can't

believe you got this apartment for us I

love this apartment so much I feel so

lucky to have someone who's such an

amazing provider corny he'll buy it if

you make him feel loved and appreciated

for what he's already done he's going to

want to do more K we're back in the

house because she had it with the car

I'm going to answer you a few more and

then we're going to go and play and have

lunch do you want cauliflower or

something cauliflower

soup do you believe in astrology and

what can you say about it I believe in

astrology in terms of I believe in the

solar system and I believe in planetary

movement and I believe that you know the

moon controls the water so it controls

our bod so there's some like movement in

the planets and all that stuff I believe

in astronomy I believe that there's a

science to everything I don't believe

that when you open a newspaper and you

see Leo it says anything about you

especially about the fact that there's

the tropical signs in which I'm a Virgo

and then the siderial in which I'm a Leo

so am I a Virgo or or a Leo you tell me

then there is the moon sign in the

siderial my moon sign is

Aquarius in the tropical it is Pisces

which one am I am I a Virgo Pisces am I

a Leo Aquarius what am I you know what I

mean

you know what I mean little baby I was

coming up here and I just wanted to tell

you that question about being fearful of

motherhood don't be Society has made you

fearful and it is bloody hard but all

things that are worth it are hard okay

you can do it you can do it I I wanted

to make this whole platform the being

her platform my book everything to

celebrate femininity and what it means

to be a woman and yes you might not be

able to work an 9 to five like a man but

you are different than a man and better

than a man in some ways how to be okay

with spending time alone when you're

codependent honey the irony of

this and you also asked how to fall in

love with yourself number one and I

don't mean to say this in any kind of

UPS sales marketing way at all it's only

because I put a bloody year of my life

into writing my book exactly about this

subject but read my book the new rules

and you should read my book to the new

rules as a bedtime

story but um I read it because

literally that is what it's about when

you're anxious when you're codependent

it's vital to fall in love with yourself

and I used to be that that used to be me

I completely understand where you're

coming from it's such a painful position

to be in because you have time and

you've got free time and you're there

and you're like I don't want to be with

myself I get joy from being with other

people but trust and believe that there

are ways and there are processes to do

it uh I can't possibly go into it in

this video but watch my videos on anous

attachment and and read that book

because it will help you you need to

fall in love with yourself and spend

time with yourself as if there's two of

you as if you're spending time with

yourself as the child version of you it

will be pivotal and life-changing way is

men test women and why why they do so

men test women because they're they want

to be with someone who is hard to get

because that gives them as a man value

in the fact that they acquired you and

the acquisition has happened and they've

got the best of what they could get okay

so they test to see if you've got

boundaries because if you don't have any

then you are low value to them

ironically they test to see how valuable

you are because they want someone who is

valuable because then they feel like a

winner in life they want the fast car

they want the big house they want the

valuable woman and they test you to see

how valuable you are how to absolve

generational poverty and build

sustainable wealth I'm a single mother I

come from a single mother family my mom

my mom was my grandma was my grandfather

tragically died my mom divorced so I get

you we didn't grow up wealthy at all I

didn't grow up wealthy at all far from

it my daughter is rolling what is

happening you understand that your power

lies in your femininity it's not a 9

to-5 it's not becoming a lawyer because

you are a single mother you don't have

the time for that but there are and I

feel like I want to make more content

about it there are ways in which you can

use your time to create money

essentially it will probably be

something that you're good at monetizing

it via creating content around it and

then creating uh courses or teaching

other people because your femininity

lies in the fact that you can create so

you also need to break down barriers

that and and ideas you have around

poverty and the fact that you will be

poor you need to create an abundant

mindset you need to do things that you

see as rich people doing

like honestly look at

this would you like a video about

abundance and creating abundance if so

let me know I'll see you on the next one

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