Why Salome Salvi Did Porn and Became An Adult Content Creator | Toni Talks

Summary

In this poignant and introspective dialogue, Salome, a sex worker and adult content creator, opens up about her journey into the industry and her personal growth. She discusses the distinction between physical and emotional connections in her work, emphasizing the importance of companionship and empathy. Salome reveals her entry into the field through the Alter community and her transition to monetizing her online presence via platforms like OnlyFans and Pornhub. She speaks candidly about her creative fulfillment in adult content creation, her aspirations in mainstream entertainment, and the impact of her upbringing in a narcissistic household on her self-esteem and personal relationships. The conversation delves into her experiences with verbal and physical abuse, her struggle with body dysmorphia, and her path to self-love and self-parenting. Salome's narrative is a testament to resilience, self-discovery, and the power of embracing one's identity.

Takeaways

• 🌟 Salome, also known as Sal, is a sex worker who views her job as providing companionship and addressing the loneliness of her clients.
• 🔍 Salome distinguishes between the physical and emotional aspects of her work, emphasizing the importance of empathy and separation of work from personal life.
• 🎨 She entered the adult industry through the Alter community, a platform for sexual self-expression, and later monetized her content on platforms like OnlyFans and Pornhub.
• 📈 Salome's income primarily comes from adult content creation, with Pornhub being a significant source, and she also works in mainstream entertainment like TV series.
• 🤝 She collaborates with other content creators in the industry, often connecting through social media platforms like Twitter.
• 💖 Salome finds joy and fulfillment in her work, relating it to her background in Fine Arts and her creative expression.
• 🧘‍♀️ She is not currently in a relationship and is focused on self-love and personal growth, acknowledging the trauma and work she needs to unlearn from past experiences.
• 🏠 Salome comes from a narcissistic household where she experienced verbal abuse and a lack of positive reinforcement, which has affected her self-esteem and body image.
• 🌱 Her journey of self-love involves acknowledging her inner child's needs and healing from the emotional wounds inflicted during her upbringing.
• 🎓 Despite the challenges, Salome is proud of her academic achievements and her ability to parent herself, providing the emotional support and validation she needs.
• 💍 She does not see marriage in her future, valuing her independence and the self-love she has cultivated over time.

Q & A

What is the name the speaker prefers to be called by?

The speaker prefers to be called Salome or Sal.

What does the speaker do to maintain their physical health?

The speaker visits a clinic every week, gets tested regularly, and tries to eat healthily due to the physical demands of their job.

How does the speaker describe the emotional aspect of their work?

The speaker views their work as providing companionship and empathizing with the loneliness of their clients, which involves an emotional connection.

How did the speaker initially start monetizing their online presence?

The speaker started by joining the Alter community, then moved to OnlyFans, and later focused on directing traffic from Twitter to OnlyFans.

What platform did the speaker eventually focus on for their adult content?

The speaker eventually focused on Pornhub to post videos and earn money based on the number of views.

What is the speaker's educational background?

The speaker has a degree in Fine Arts from the University of the Philippines.

What is the speaker's current relationship status?

The speaker is not in a relationship and is not interested in one at the moment, focusing instead on self-love and personal growth.

How does the speaker feel about their work in the adult entertainment industry?

The speaker feels happy with their work, believing it to be something they are good at and that it fulfills their creative desires.

What was the speaker's childhood like, and how has it influenced their adult life?

The speaker grew up in a narcissistic household where they experienced verbal and, at times, physical abuse, leading to a journey of self-discovery and self-love.

How does the speaker view the concept of marriage?

The speaker is not against marriage but does not see it as a necessity for their own happiness, valuing self-love and independence.

What message would the speaker give to their younger self?

The speaker would tell their younger self to hold on, dream big, and know that they are beautiful, loved, and valued.

How does the speaker cope with negative comments on social media?

The speaker acknowledges that there will be negative comments but emphasizes the importance of self-love and not letting negativity win.

Outlines

00:00

💬 Introduction and Discussion on Sex Work

The conversation begins with a friendly greeting and an introduction of the interviewee, Salome. It delves into her daily routine, including her commitment to maintaining her health and appearance for her physically demanding job as a sex worker. Salome explains the emotional and physical aspects of her work, emphasizing the companionship aspect and the empathy required to connect with clients. She shares her journey into the industry, starting with her involvement in the Alter community, a group expressing their sexual identity, which led to monetizing her online presence through platforms like OnlyFans and Pornhub. The paragraph concludes with Salome's reflections on her work, her creative fulfillment, and her current and past employment status.

05:02

🎨 Self-Discovery and Healing Through Art

In this segment, Salome discusses her personal journey of self-love and the realization that she is still on a path of self-discovery and healing. She acknowledges her lack of interest in relationships due to past failures and her focus on personal growth. Salome shares her goal of improving her skills as an actress in mainstream entertainment, having recently entered the TV and film industry. She also reflects on her childhood, growing up in a narcissistic household where she received constant negative reinforcement, leading to issues like body dysmorphia and self-hatred. The conversation touches on her healing process and her understanding that she needs to love herself before she can love others.

10:03

😢 Overcoming Trauma and Seeking Accountability

Salome opens up about the verbal and physical abuse she suffered during her childhood, which deeply affected her self-esteem and mental health. She talks about her parents' lack of initiative to change and their refusal to acknowledge her past experiences of abuse. Despite this, she credits her parents for encouraging her academic and artistic talents. Salome also discusses a specific incident of sexual abuse and her parents' dismissive response, which led to feelings of betrayal and the development of her strong facade. She emphasizes the importance of self-accountability and the challenges she faces in being her own parent and guide.

15:05

💍 Reflections on Independence and Self-Love

In the final paragraph, Salome contemplates her views on marriage and relationships, expressing her desire for independence and her belief in the importance of self-love. She shares her journey of transforming her self-perception from feeling ugly to recognizing her own beauty and worth. Salome talks about the challenges of dealing with negative comments on social media and the importance of self-affirmation. She concludes with a message to her younger self, offering reassurance and encouragement to dream big and believe in herself, highlighting the power of self-love and self-belief.

Keywords

💡Sex work

Sex work refers to the occupation of engaging in sexual activities for payment. In the video's context, it is presented as a legitimate form of labor that involves not only sexual services but also companionship. The speaker discusses their experience as a sex worker, emphasizing the emotional connection and empathy involved in their work, as well as the physical aspects.

💡Companionship work

Companionship work is a term used to describe a service where individuals provide company and emotional support to clients, often beyond just sexual services. The script mentions that the speaker sees their work as providing companionship to clients who lack intimacy, highlighting the emotional aspect of their job.

💡OnlyFans

OnlyFans is a content subscription service where creators can earn money from users who subscribe to their content. The speaker mentions using OnlyFans as a platform to monetize their content, indicating a shift from traditional employment to digital platforms for income generation.

💡PornHub

PornHub is a popular website for sharing and viewing adult content. The speaker discusses using Pornhub as a platform to post videos and earn money based on views, illustrating the intersection of technology and the adult entertainment industry.

💡Alter community

The Alter community is described as a group of individuals who express themselves sexually. The speaker joined this community as a way to express their sexuality and identity, indicating a search for self-expression and acceptance.

💡Narcissistic household

A narcissistic household refers to a family environment where one or more family members exhibit narcissistic personality traits, often leading to negative behaviors such as bullying and belittling others. The speaker describes their upbringing in a narcissistic household, which involved constant criticism and emotional abuse.

💡Imposter syndrome

Imposter syndrome is a psychological pattern where individuals doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent fear of being exposed as a 'fraud'. The speaker mentions experiencing imposter syndrome, suggesting a struggle with self-worth and recognition despite their achievements.

💡Body dysmorphia

Body dysmorphia is a mental disorder where a person obsesses over perceived flaws in their physical appearance. The speaker discusses their struggle with body dysmorphia, which is linked to the negative self-image they developed from their upbringing.

💡Self-love

Self-love is the act of having a deep affection for oneself, valuing one's own well-being and happiness. The speaker's journey of learning to love themselves is a central theme of the video, as they work to overcome past traumas and negative self-perceptions.

💡Fine Arts

Fine Arts refers to a field of study that encompasses creative disciplines such as painting, sculpture, and performing arts. The speaker mentions having a degree in Fine Arts, which connects their background in creativity to their current work in the adult entertainment industry.

💡Inner child

The term 'inner child' refers to the part of an individual's psyche that represents their childlike qualities and early life experiences. The speaker reflects on acknowledging and honoring their inner child as part of their personal growth and healing process.

Highlights

Salome discusses her work in the adult entertainment industry, emphasizing the importance of companionship alongside physical services.

Salome explains how she manages to separate the physical and emotional aspects of her work, attributing it to the professional nature of her job.

Her journey into the adult industry began with joining the Alter community, a group for sexual self-expression.

Salome's transition to monetizing her online presence started in 2020, initially through OnlyFans and later focusing on Pornhub.

She describes her work on platforms like Viva and GMA as her closest equivalent to a day job, alongside her adult content creation.

Salome's main source of income is now from adult content on Pornhub, reflecting a shift from traditional employment.

She collaborates with other content creators in her videos, often connecting through social media platforms like Twitter.

Salome sees her career in adult entertainment as a long-term pursuit, deeply tied to her personal enjoyment and creative fulfillment.

Her educational background in Fine Arts and a natural inclination towards creativity are expressed through her work in the adult industry.

Salome feels a strong connection to her body and her sexual partners, which she attributes to her high empathy level.

Despite past relationship failures, Salome is currently uninterested in pursuing romantic relationships, focusing instead on self-improvement and personal growth.

She discusses her goal of improving her skills in the mainstream entertainment industry, with a dream of becoming a successful actress.

Salome acknowledges the impact of her childhood, particularly the lack of positive reinforcement and the presence of narcissistic behavior in her family.

She shares her experience of being verbally and emotionally abused by her family, which has contributed to her struggles with self-worth and body image.

Salome recounts an incident of sexual abuse during her childhood and her family's dismissive response, which deepened her feelings of betrayal and mistrust.

Despite the hardships, she has learned to become her own parent, providing herself with the emotional support, validation, and guidance she needs.

Salome has developed a strong sense of self-love and self-worth, overcoming the negative messages she received during her upbringing.

She expresses her belief in not needing a partner to be happy, having learned the importance and power of self-love.

Salome shares a heartfelt message to her younger self, offering reassurance and encouragement to dream big and believe in her own worth.

She acknowledges the ongoing challenge of maintaining self-love and positivity in the face of negative comments and societal pressures.

Transcripts

Hello!

Hi!

What shall I call you?

You may call me Salome or Sal.

Okay, okay.

Hello, hello, hello.

Hi, so nice to meet you.

So nice to meet you.

Sit here. We are too far from each other.

We are too far from each other.

Okay, so here we go.

Because I'm meeting a new person.

Yeah.

Did you work today?

No, no, no.

Yesterday?

I had some errands that are related to my work.

Like for example, like I go to a clinic every week

maintaining my looks and my body.

How about healthwise?

Yeah, like I have some measures to help maintain that.

Like for example, I get tested very often.

And you know, like I try to eat healthy and maintain my body

Because our job requires a lot of physical labor.

People say that

when two people do it

Mhmm. it's like two pieces of paper pasted together.

And then once you tear it apart.

There is residue.

A part of that person stays with you.

Yes, yes.

That is what having sex or

Mhmm.

doing it with someone.

Mhmm.

So, how it is in your case?

How do you separate the physical and the emotional connection?

Because it's work.

Yes, it is.

So how?

I think that is definitely part of sex work.

Because another term for sex work that we can use

is companionship work.

Because sex is not the only service we provide to our customers.

It's mostly companionship.

Because these people, because of the lack

of intimacy that they get

they will seek sex work providers.

And I just want that emotional involvement

is also a part of our service.

You have to empathize with the loneliness

that your clients feel.

But, I also believe that

it's possible to compartmentalize and separate.

How did you become a sex worker?

And how did you enter the porn industry?

How did it start?

I started as an Alter, as a member of the Alter community.

Alter community is?

It was this community filled with people

who need to express themselves sexually.

There's that need for some people.

Like, "I want to tell the world and live my truth that I am a sexual person."

Some people need an outlet for that.

And at that time in my life, I felt like I needed that also.

So I was like, "I want to join this community."

"I want to be a part of it."

"I want to make my own account, post my own nudes."

When did you start getting paid to do it?

So yeah, like in 2020, like I didn't have a job.

I realized that this might be the best time

for me to start monetizing the platform that I built.

How did you get monetized?

At first, I entered OnlyFans.

And then on Twitter, since I had 30,000 followers

I would just post on Twitter

"Hey, if you want more content, go on OnlyFans."

So I was redirecting the traffic

to where people can actually

pay me for my content.

So that's how I started monetizing it.

But eventually I left OnlyFans

and then I started to focus on Pornhub.

So I would post my videos there

and the more views that they get

the more money that I'll have for myself.

There is no day job anymore?

-Yeah, yeah, yeah. -This is what you do for a living.

May be the closest thing that I have to a day job

would be my work for Viva and my work for GMA.

Your TV series.

Yeah, the TV series.

Yeah.

So, but yeah, I think I would consider

my main source of income comes from PornHub

and you know the adult content.

Who are the people you're with in the videos?

Sometimes it's other content creators

that I got connected to on Twitter.

How long do you see yourself doing it?

Indefinitely.

Because it's something that is really, really close to my heart.

It's something that I really enjoy doing.

And, you know, I have a degree in Fine Arts.

Because I have a background in art.

Even as a kid, I've always been creative.

I've always been into visual art.

So, my love for visual art and the creative hunger that I feel

it's being fulfilled by porn.

And making porn and making content

being on social media, like all of that

like really scratches my creative itch.

How does it make you feel

when you watch the video?

For me, personally, I am happy with what I do.

And, I know within myself

that have a lot of skills.

I can do so many things, but I think

sex is what I am best at.

Because I'm really in tune with my body.

I have a high empathy level.

So, I connect really well with my sexual partners

And I have that kind of relationship with sex work

and I don't see myself leaving it anytime soon.

Because it's something that gives me a lot of joy.

Are you in a relationship right now?

No, and I'm not interested.

Ahh.

-Yeah. -Why?

I just realized that over time-

because I had one relationship to date in my life.

And that relationship failed.

And, after the failure of that relationship

I realized that, "Maybe it's not for me right now."

Because there's a lot of work and a lot of trauma

that I have to unlearn within myself.

And I believe that you cannot love until you love yourself first.

And I am still on that journey.

That you are loving yourself?

Mhmm. Learning to love myself

and learning to really take care of myself

and be kind to myself.

Because I learned that

If you hate yourself

if there's nothing but hate inside you for yourself

it will spill out.

It will affect your other relationships.

Let's focus on myself first.

And then, if I'm ready

Who knows?

Maybe I'll be open to it in the future.

But right now, I have my goals.

Relationship is not yet in the picture.

What is your goal now?

It's really work.

Like, I want to get better at my job

especially now that I entered the mainstream entertainment industry.

-I'm doing TV now and film. -Yes.

So, I'm focusing on how to get better at that.

Because it's always been my dream to be

-An actress? -in film.

Yeah, an actress to be in film.

So, now, that it's here.

The opportunity is in front of me.

We'll d our best, right?

Because we believe that

a big part of who we are today is based

on what happened to us in our childhood.

Yes.

I think a big part of the growth that

I'm experiencing right now is acknowledging that inner child

and honoring what that child has wanted

that wasn't given to her.

What wasn't given to young Sal?

I think that she missed out on a lot of positive attention and reinforcement.

Because I came from a narcissistic household.

I learned quite recently

that it's possible for a narcissist to gather

and exist in the same family.

What happens with narcissists, is that they feel terrible about themselves.

They want everyone around them to feel terrible as well.

So, what happens in a narcissistic households with narcissistic parents

they bully their children.

They tell them, "You're ugly. You have no future."

You know, like, "All of your decisions are wrong."

"You don't know what's best for yourself."

I grew up hearing that every day.

They scold and humiliate me in front of our guests.

My mom and her siblings would gather around

and then they will talk--

Can I swear?

-Can I swear here? -Yeah.

Yeah, they would talk shit.

How old were you that time?

The earliest I can remember was 5-8 years old.

How do they talk about you?

Like they would make fun of my clothes.

They would make fun of my gums.

-They would make fun of-- -Your mother?

My own mother.

That was the most painful part.

Like, you're a mother.

I'm tearing up.

Then you're-- No, it's okay.

I'll let you know.

Sometimes it's for me.

But yeah, like you're not supposed to tell your kid that.

I really believe that for people who grew up in narcissistic households.

Their parents were their first bullies.

I realized it when I started visiting my friend's houses

I would stay over with them.

I see them like

They're all treating each other in a civil way

in a kind way.

And I'm like, "Why is it not like this at home?"

"Why am I just receiving criticism?"

So there is no positive affirmation at all?

There is but it was mostly negative.

Because that's what stuck to me.

If what I received are mostly positive

why am I broken now?

Why do I have body dysmorphia issues?

Why do I hate myself so much?

I believed that I would die a virgin and no one will love me

because everyday they keep on telling me that

I don't deserve that because I'm ugly.

So when you look at yourself in the mirror?

-Do you find yourself ugly that time? -Very ugly.

I would see nothing that I would like, you know?

Because nobody told me that that's what you were supposed to do.

I had to break all of my beliefs about myself that are ugly

in order for me to move forward.

Have you forgiven your parents?

I'm open to that happening

but they have to put in the work.

Because I put in the work

of like trying to heal

from the damage that they cause.

So I know that people can change.

And I know they can do it if they just put in the work.

But I couldn't see that initiative from them.

So, why should I forgive them if they're not going through that?

I need an accountability from them.

-Because you were abused verbally growing up. -Mhmm. Yeah.

Physically you were abused?

Yes, there are moments like that.

But the physical abuse wasn't as damaging

or as prevalent as the verbal abuse.

And I think that's what broke me.

In fairness to my parents, I know now I've been talking shit about them.

But when it comes to like academic achievements

they really like encouraged me

to work on the many talents that I was blessed with.

Because when I was a kid, I loved doing math.

I loved acting.

I loved singing and writing and drawing.

Like I was able to do all of those things.

But, in retrospect, I think that they were doing that

because it looks good for the family

when they have a gifted child, right?

That is the only time

I experienced positive reinforcement.

Whenever I see that my parents are proud of me

because I was good for their image.

There was a physical abuse when you were eight years old.

There was.

But not from within my family.

Sexual abuse?

Mhmm.

Because when I told them, that this happened to me.

They didn't believe me.

What was done to you?

I was touched in a way that made me feel--

Inappropriately?

Very inappropriate.

It was like, "We were just playing."

Because he was my playmate.

That's when I first experienced that

I don't have control over my body in this situation.

And then, yeah, when I told my parents

at first, they acknowledged it.

And then the subsequent times that I brought it up

they were like, "That didn't happen."

That's the most painful part that

they blamed it on my existing mental health issues.

"No. Why are you throwing a tantrum?"

Why are you acting like a crazy person?

That's what--

It's like...

They labeled you as crazy?

They labeled me as crazy.

They know the person who did that to me.

And they allowed that person to be part of their lives.

Drinking with that person, receiving him as a guest.

At our place.

So, whenever they would do that, I would feel betrayed.

As an adult, of course I would tell my parents that

-"Hey, I don't--" -"He did something to me."

"He did something to me."

"I don't like them to be around me."

"I don't feel safe."

And then one of the incidents where I brought it up

that person was a guest in our house.

They were like, "Don't throw a tantrum. You're embarrassing us."

And I kept repeating it to them

"No, he did something to me."

And they were like, "No, you're just imagining that."

"That never happened. That's not true."

And they wonder, "Why are you hiding so much from us?"

"Why are you always lying about where you are and what's going on?"

"Because based on experience, whenever I tell the truth, you punish me."

So, of course, as a kid you grow up telling lies

because all you want is not to get hurt

and to save your ass.

You're so strong.

Very.

It's like you build a facade.

"You can't hurt me anymore, I am strong."

Because you have experienced so much inner pain as a kid.

-Yeah. -Until now, right?

-Yeah. -Has anyone told you how strong you are?

Or you realized it yourself?

I think, like the people around me didn't forget

in telling me that.

And I have a habit of discrediting myself.

Of not giving myself enough credit for what I've achieved.

I have a slight imposter syndrome.

"You don't deserve it."

Yeah, yeah, I have a slight imposter syndrome.

She graduated in UP (University of the Philippines) with a degree in Fine Arts.

Yeah, I learned eventually that I cannot count on my parents

to be the parents that I deserve as a child.

It's now up to me to parent myself.

And that is the hardest thing that I've had

to do for myself.

To be a parent to yourself.

That if I needed anybody.

I cannot ask my parents for money, for emotional support

for validation.

No, I have to give that all to myself.

Because there is no one else.

Who teaches the difference between right and wrong?

Yeah, yeah.

Who guides you?

Who gives wisdom and the right---

I think as adults, we are the most

accountable to our future selves.

That's what I always keep in mind.

Everything that I do, always go back

and it will help

future Salome to be better.

You know, like, you know, I work hard now.

So that future Salome would not have financial problems.

That's how I think now.

It would be nice if I had my parents to guide me

and, you know, to be with me

while I'm going through this.

But, if it's not possible,

I have to learn how to

give everything to myself.

And that's my main struggle now.

Do you see yourself getting married in the future?

No.

No.

Why?

Because it's just funny that--

You don't believe in marriage?

It's not that I don't believe in marriage.

I'm not gonna say that they don't last, because they do.

Sometimes it works out really well for people.

But for a lot of people, like, the relationship will work.

maybe for five years, ten years.

But after that there's gonna be a certain point that they'll part ways.

So I don't want to be stuck in a position

where I'm not gonna be able to, like, separate from the person.

Especially now that I'm learning how to love myself

and now, I can see how it is like to truly love yourself.

And what that entails

and how difficult that really is.

Now that I'm learning what that is

I feel like once I learn how to get there

I wouldn't need the partner to make myself happy.

I know now that nobody's gonna love me better than I love myself.

So when you look at yourself in the mirror now, what do you see?

Oh.

I'm pretty happy.

I remember there was a person that I hooked up with.

He was an artist.

He told me that

It's insane that

I had to make a Twitter, gain 30,000 followers

show my body and have people

tell me that I make them horny.

That I had to become Salome.

I had to become a different person.

Just so I can tell myself that

what my parents told me was all wrong

when I was growing up, that I was ugly.

You know?

And having gone through all of that

having gone through that process

it culminated in a moment

where I can look at myself in the mirror

and feel nothing but love.

So, if you have something to say to your inner child, the young Sal?

I will tell her that

"You're gonna be okay."

That you will eventually fulfill all of your dreams.

Like all of the attention that you wanted, you'll get there.

All of the love that you didn't get from your parents

you'll get it from other people and you'll get it from yourself.

Just hold on and dream.

Dream as big as you want.

Dream big because that's all I did when I was young.

And I didn't know that I'll be here.

I didn't know that I'll be here with you.

And it's a huge deal for me that---

"My story is worth listening to."

Yeah, and that's definitely what little Salome used to believe about herself.

So I just want to like come from the future and tell her

"You know what? Just dream."

"Be a kid."

"Do whatever you want."

"Because if it's for you, it's gonna come for you."

That's what they always say that the blessings will not come

the blessings will not enter, your dreams will not come true

if you don't make way in your life for them to come in.

That's what I'll tell her.

You are beautiful.

You are loved.

-Sometimes it's really hard to believe. -You are valued.

You are worth loving.

Yeah.

This is how you love yourself.

You need to be with yourself at the times when your soul feels lonely.

Something like that.

-It's like that. -You became your own friend.

Yeah, yeah.

Of course there are days when I look at myself and I'm like, "Ugh."

Yeah, I gained weight.

I don't like my teeth.

I don't like this.

I don't like that.

Because there are still mean people on Facebook

that would tell you that, "Oh, you have nasty gums."

"You look like you smell."

"You're worn out."

"You're too old." or whatever.

Of course there are gonna be times that that's gonna get to you.

And it's up to me to not let that side win.

It's up to me to let love always win when I look at myself.