Your phone is (way) worse than you think it is...
Summary
TLDRThe speaker reflects on their unconscious habit of using their phone excessively, even during mundane activities like using the toilet. They discuss the negative impact of smartphones on mental health, dopamine regulation, and how they contribute to societal polarization. The script highlights the addictive nature of social media algorithms, which push content to incite strong reactions and deepen divisions. The speaker encourages viewers to reduce phone usage to regain focus, motivation, and enjoyment of real-life experiences.
Takeaways
- 📱 We often mindlessly use our phones, even when we are against doing so, like on the toilet.
- 🧠 Using our phones excessively damages our dopamine systems and prevents us from truly enjoying life.
- 😩 Phones have made us forget how to be bored and focus on real tasks without constant distractions.
- 👀 Social media can lead us down harmful rabbit holes, like relapsing into bad habits, even when we had no intention to do so.
- 💔 Algorithms polarize us, deepening divisions by feeding us content that reinforces our biases and even fostering hate.
- 😞 Social media comparisons make us feel inadequate, as we often see exaggerated or fake portrayals of others' lives.
- 🚶♂️ Without phones, we would likely be more driven to pursue meaningful goals, relationships, and experiences in real life.
- 🎮 Activities that used to bring us joy, like gaming or spending time with loved ones, now feel less satisfying due to overstimulation from phones.
- 💡 We can choose to limit phone use and regain control over our attention, motivation, and happiness.
- 🌱 Putting down the phone allows us to reconnect with real-life experiences and reduce feelings of depression, anxiety, and division.
Q & A
What realization did the speaker have while in the bathroom?
-The speaker realized they were about to mindlessly scroll through apps like TikTok or Instagram on their phone, despite regularly advising others not to use their phones excessively, especially in the bathroom.
Why does the speaker compare the phone to other time-wasting activities like video games?
-The speaker believes that while activities like playing video games can waste time and affect dopamine levels, the phone is even more harmful because it is accessible all the time, leading to constant distraction and loss of focus.
How does the speaker describe the impact of using phones on the brain's dopamine system?
-The speaker claims that constant phone use numbs the brain's dopamine system, making it harder to enjoy real-life activities and causing a dependency on the phone for instant gratification.
What effect does the speaker believe social media algorithms have on people's political views?
-The speaker argues that social media algorithms amplify political polarization by repeatedly showing content that aligns with a user's slight leanings, eventually making them more extreme in their views and potentially fostering hate for people with opposing beliefs.
What problem does the speaker highlight regarding social comparisons on social media?
-The speaker suggests that social media fosters unhealthy comparisons, making users feel inadequate when they see others' seemingly better lives, which can lead to feelings of failure or dissatisfaction.
How does the speaker believe constant phone use affects the ability to enjoy real-life fun?
-The speaker feels that overuse of phones ruins the ability to enjoy real-life fun because the phone overloads the brain with easy dopamine hits, making more meaningful activities, like spending time with friends or achieving goals, less enjoyable.
What does the speaker say about people's ability to handle boredom today?
-The speaker claims that people have 'unlearned' how to be bored due to constant phone use. Even a brief moment without something to do leads them to pick up their phones instead of allowing their minds to rest or focus.
How does the speaker describe the effect of seeing certain content, like attractive people, on social media?
-The speaker explains that seeing attractive people or suggestive content on social media can trigger unintended reactions, such as visiting pornographic sites, even when the user wasn’t originally seeking that kind of content.
What example does the speaker give about how social media can influence relationships with others?
-The speaker mentions how disagreements over political figures or opinions, often fueled by social media algorithms, can cause family members or friends to stop talking to each other, deepening divides over issues like 'the orange man.'
What solution does the speaker propose for reducing the negative effects of phone use?
-The speaker suggests being more mindful of phone use, choosing to put the phone down in situations where it isn’t needed, such as social settings, and breaking the habit of constantly turning to the phone for entertainment.
Outlines
📱 Mindless Phone Use on the Toilet
In this paragraph, the speaker describes a personal experience where they brought their phone to the toilet and realized how mindless scrolling has become second nature. They reflect on the contradiction of advocating against excessive phone use while falling into the same habit themselves. The speaker highlights how phones numb the dopamine system and distract people from simple tasks, like going to the bathroom, and laments the loss of our ability to be bored.
🤳 The Downside of Constant Phone Distraction
This section delves into how phones have eroded our ability to be present and live in the moment. The speaker explains that people often turn to their phones to fill even short moments of inactivity, which gradually numbs the brain and reduces the ability to focus. They also warn that this compulsive use can lead to relapses into habits like watching pornography, as the constant flow of stimulating content pushes us toward unhealthy behavior.
🚨 Social Media's Polarizing Effect on Society
Here, the speaker argues that social media algorithms are contributing to societal polarization. They explain how algorithms exploit people's preferences and subtly push them toward extreme viewpoints. The example given is how slightly right-leaning individuals are bombarded with content that gradually pushes them further to the right. This manipulation extends to various aspects, such as politics and diet, ultimately creating divisions and fostering hate between groups.
⚠️ Growing Hostility Between Genders
This paragraph focuses on how online content exacerbates negative stereotypes and attitudes, particularly towards women. The speaker notes that many young men are exposed to videos that portray women in a negative light, which fuels resentment and hostility toward the opposite gender. The speaker even admits to feeling this influence personally, despite being aware of it, illustrating how powerful these online narratives can be in shaping behavior and beliefs.
💔 How Algorithms Tear Families Apart
The speaker emphasizes the destructive impact of polarization, giving real-world examples of how families have been torn apart over political disagreements. They mention how social media algorithms intensify these divides, creating extreme camps that stop communicating altogether. The speaker highlights how this constant exposure to polarizing content is deepening hatred between people with differing views and disrupting family bonds.
🏞️ How Phones Steal Our Ability to Enjoy Life
In this section, the speaker laments how excessive phone use has stolen people's ability to enjoy real-life activities. They argue that the constant dopamine hits from phones have fried our brains, making it hard to experience joy from simple things like playing games or spending time with friends. The speaker imagines a world without phones, where people would be driven to pursue meaningful activities, meet friends, and work towards goals. This contrast highlights how phones have dulled our drive to engage with the real world.
🚪 Escaping Real Life with Instant Distractions
This paragraph discusses how phones allow people to escape uncomfortable feelings, such as fear of rejection or boredom. The speaker describes how easy it is to turn to the phone whenever discomfort arises, numbing emotions and avoiding real life. They note that even engaging in activities like gaming has lost its appeal because our dopamine systems are so overstimulated by phone use.
🔄 Falling into Mindless Scrolling, Even Unconsciously
Here, the speaker admits that even they occasionally fall into the trap of mindless scrolling, despite their awareness and discipline. They recount how, while doing something productive on their phone, they end up pressing Instagram or TikTok buttons without realizing it. This paragraph underlines how ingrained this habit has become for most people and encourages self-awareness and discipline to break free from it.
🛑 Choosing to Put Down the Phone
The speaker stresses that, despite the challenges, it's possible to put the phone down and regain control. They argue that people often overestimate the importance of having their phone with them at all times, defending it with arguments like missing important calls. However, the speaker suggests that in most situations, the phone isn’t necessary, and leaving it behind can be liberating and improve one's quality of life.
💪 Regaining Fun and Enjoyment by Using Phones Less
In this final paragraph, the speaker encourages the audience to realize that reducing phone use will actually increase the overall amount of fun in life. They argue that stepping away from the constant digital distractions will not only reduce feelings of depression and hatred but also reignite people's ability to enjoy real-life activities, like games and social interactions. The speaker emphasizes that this small change can lead to more motivation, better relationships, and a more fulfilling life overall.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Dopamine System
💡Mindless Scrolling
💡Polarization
💡Instant Distraction
💡Comparing Yourself to Others
💡Numbing
💡Relapse to Porn
💡Unlearning to be Bored
💡Attention Economy
💡Losing Real Fun
Highlights
Realization of mindlessly using the phone: The speaker realizes they are about to mindlessly scroll through their phone, even though they usually advise against it.
Phones numbing our dopamine system: The speaker highlights how phones constantly stimulate our dopamine system, numbing us and removing the ability to be bored or focus.
Lack of focus and need for constant distraction: People have unlearned how to be bored and constantly distract themselves using their phones.
Impact of social media leading to porn addiction: The speaker points out how mindless scrolling on social media can lead to triggers like sexy images, which can escalate to pornography consumption.
Social media comparison and self-esteem: People often compare themselves to others on social media, leading to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.
Polarization through algorithms: The speaker mentions how social media algorithms push people towards extremes, amplifying political divisions and reinforcing biases.
Negative emotions towards women from online content: Exposure to specific types of online content has led some men to develop negative feelings towards women.
Social media's role in polarizing society: The algorithms are polarizing us on various issues, from politics to lifestyle choices, leading to more hatred between groups.
Lack of real-life engagement: Phones and social media prevent people from truly enjoying real-life experiences like playing games, spending time with family, or working toward goals.
Loss of motivation due to dopamine overload: The overstimulation of the brain's dopamine system by phone usage has drained people's motivation to pursue meaningful goals.
Inability to enjoy life's simple pleasures: Phones have desensitized us to the joy of simple, fun activities, making it difficult to enjoy even traditional hobbies.
Escaping discomfort through instant distraction: Whenever we feel discomfort, we immediately turn to our phones to escape, preventing personal growth and real-world action.
Regaining control by reducing phone use: The speaker emphasizes that we have the power to choose not to use our phones all the time, which would lead to improved well-being.
Reduced hatred and polarization with less phone usage: By using our phones less, we can reduce the anger and hate we feel toward people with different opinions or lifestyles.
Improved life satisfaction and fun with less phone usage: Putting the phone down leads to a better quality of life, more enjoyment of fun activities, and increased social engagement.
Transcripts
it was yesterday that I went to the
toilet for a number two I lowered the
lid I sat down I was ready to do my
thing and suddenly I thought to myself
holy
crap I have my phone in my hand right
now and I was about to just mindlessly
open up some app like Tik Tok or
Instagram and just starts crawling like
a zombie to numb my brain and to just
keep myself entertained while while I'm
on the toilet me I literally make videos
telling people to not take their phone
with them to the toilet and to not use
your phone too much and subconsciously
without even really knowing it without
even really thinking about it I had
brought my phone with me to the toilet
and I was about to just mindlessly
scroll on that
thing and I thought to
myself
wow this thing really is that bad isn't
it I mean there are other things that
are bad for us yeah when we play too
much video games and it numbs our
dopamine system and it wastes our time
sure but I don't think many other things
have the potential to really really mess
up our life like this thing has right
here our
phone cuz first of all there's the sheer
fact that we can use our phone all the
time right when we have nothing to do
for a single minute maybe not even a
minute maybe like like literally 10 or
20 seconds whenever we have nothing to
do we pick up our phone and boom we
start numbing our dopamine system again
right we've literally unlearned to be
bored we've unlearned to focus on
something we cannot do nothing anymore
for a single minute we start distracting
ourselves again maybe you go to the
toilet and you bring your phone with you
because you just want to entertain
yourself and you're bored you know you
just you just want some dopamine you
would just want to see some funny videos
so you go over to Instagram while you
sit on on the toilet but then you see a
sexy girl on Instagram and that sexy
girl triggers you so you click on the
profile of the sexy girl and then you
get triggered even more and then you
head over to the pee Hub and then before
you know it you just relapse to porn
again you weren't even horny were you
you just wanted to see some funny videos
while you were taken a [ __ ] you weren't
even horny but because of the way that
everything is set up on this thing for
like maximum stimul relation and
distraction and just you know steal your
attention you just ended up relapsing to
porn again and the things that it shows
us so on social media you compare
yourself to other people you might see
someone that is more successful than you
are you might see someone that is better
looking than you are that has a better
body and then you feel like [ __ ] about
yourself because you think I down I'm
I'm not as good as these people are or I
should have been farther ahead had in
life right now I should have achieved
some of my goals already I'm such a
loser because you compare yourself to
these other people but a lot of the time
what you see from these other people
isn't that great at all you know it's
like semif fake pictures that you see
these people might not even be happy but
that's what you think that they are you
always think that people are happy and
that people are better than you so you
start to feel like [ __ ] about yourself
the algorithms are always pushing you in
One Direction and it's making you hate
people who are being pushed in the other
direction it's polarizing us it's
pushing us apart and it's making people
hate each other so for example maybe you
have like a certain interest or a
certain political opinion right maybe
you are like slightly leaning to the
right on the political Spectrum you've
never cared that much about politics you
never really even thought about it but
if you really have to choose with a gun
on your hat you'd probably say okay yeah
I'll pick right because I believe in
biological facts in these days if you
believe in biological facts then you're
automatically a right-wing person so I
I'll I'll pick right-wing
okay but then the algorithms they are
smart enough to pick up on the fact that
you are leaning right-winged and so the
algorithms think
hahaa I could milk this guy's feelings
for some money so the algorithms start
showing you more and more right-winged
political content they start showing you
more videos of how left-wing people are
absolutely crazy and they start showing
you debate videos of how right-wing
people are owning the left-wing people
and subconsciously without even
realizing it or without even wanting it
you automatically start to become more
and more right-winged until eventually
you kind of start to dislike or even
hate people who are left wait or maybe
it's something else you know like Diet
maybe it's vegans versus the carnivores
or maybe it's the feminists versus the
black pillars or whatever it is it's
happening right we're being polarized on
every possible aspect that we can be
polarized on and we start to hate entire
groups of other people because of it I
see so many young guys right now and I I
even see this in myself to a certain
extent who started develop somewhat
negative feelings about women because
you see so many videos on the internet
of like how women are being superficial
right oh these women are all hoes and
they're all superficial oh and they only
date Super Chat and oh my God look at
them cheating right you see all these
videos about women doing bad things and
about cool rep pill people owning these
women and eventually without even really
wanting it you start to develop more
negative feelings towards women it
happens it happens to everyone even if
you're aware of it like I am there's
like some part inside of me that when I
see one of these videos I feel like a
little bit of frustration towards the
women that I'm seeing and sure yeah
there have always been people who had
different opinions there have always
been people with different political
preferences and there have always been
people who had certain morals who judged
people who didn't have those morals but
I don't think we've ever really been at
the point where we've been so polarized
that you literally have entire armies of
women who collectively hate all men that
exist in the world or entire armies of
angry black pillars who hate all women
who exist in the world we have families
that have fights and they break up and
they don't talk to each other anymore
right like parents who don't talk to
their children or brothers and sisters
they never speak to each other again
because they couldn't agree on whether
they liked the orange man or not they
think it's the end of the world right oh
he likes the orange man I don't like the
orange man so now we're never ever going
to speak to each other
again these are things that are
unironically happening in the world
right now and it's largely being caused
by the fact that the algorithms on the
social media apps on our phone are
polarizing us all day long you pick this
thing up whenever you have nothing to do
for one minute when you're on the toilet
you open up Instagram and boom there's a
video there's a video pushing you in One
Direction and making you hate people who
are being pushed in the other direction
and one of the worst things that it does
in my opinion is that it is preventing
us from having actual real fun in life
you know the things that were actually
supposed to be fun like playing a game
or hanging out with your friends
spending time with your family working
towards your goals productively and
feeling satisfied feeling a sense of
productivity and satisfaction in your
life those things we can no longer enjoy
those things anymore because our
dopamine system is cooked it it's fried
right it doesn't work
anymore and you know why you know why we
cannot enjoy the fun things in our life
anymore
it's because we spend up to several
hours a
day
doing
this this is what we're doing this is
the amount of fun that we're having
right here
this that is the reason why we can no
longer enjoy the fun things in our life
anymore I'd say it goes even further I'd
say it even prevents us from
actually going out and truly living Our
Lives cuz think about it think about how
this thing holds us back the extent to
which this thing holds us back just try
to imagine a world where would be no
phones at all okay it wouldn't exist
there would be no phone there would be
no alternative there would be no device
that you could just carry with you all
the time and use as an in instant
distraction
device in this world there would be so
many
opportunities where you just got bored
or you had nothing to do
whatever and you would just feel driven
to just go out and do something right
you would go out just go out in nature
you would just go out and touch some
grass you would feel driven to just meet
your friends right because you were born
you had nothing to do so you'd call up
your friends hey let's do something
let's go out and do something you would
feel driven to work towards your goals
because you had nothing to do
you'd actually have a fresh dopamine
system that gave you some motivation to
want to work toward a
your you'd feel driven to talk to your
crush to bring up the courage and talk
to your crush cuz you had nothing else
to do you could actually go out and live
your life
right but we don't have any of those
things anymore we don't have that drive
at all anymore because the very second
that we have nothing to do or we feel
slightly uncomfortable about the idea of
talking to our crush or doing some other
uncomfortable things the very second we
feel that
discomfort we escape the feeling and Bam
we start to numb our dopamine system
with our instant distraction device
right we temporarily make ourselves feel
better by escaping the feeling with this
name we've completely lost the drive to
actually go out and live our lives we've
completely numbs our dopamine system we
have no motivation anymore to go and do
things and even if we do things in the
comfort of our own home and try to play
a video game whatever we don't actually
have any fun anymore doing them because
we've used this thing so much and I
know that it's hard to put that thing
down and to not bring it with you all
the time and then not pick it up all the
time I know cuz like I said in the
beginning of this video sometimes it
even happens to me even with all the
experience and all the knowledge and all
the discipline that I have sometimes I
subconsciously take it with me and
sometimes I subconsciously without even
thinking about it when I'm on my phone
doing something that's actually useful
subconsciously I press that Instagram or
I press that Tik Tok button or when I'm
doing work things right when I'm
uploading a video to Instagram as soon
as the video is uploaded I scroll a few
times and then I catch myself and I
think hey whoa wait a second I was
scrolling through the rails right it
happens even to me so I know that is
hard but it's not
impossible we have the option to control
ourselves and to catch ourselves doing
it and then tell ourselves no I'm not
going to continue doing this we have the
option to put our phones down we have
the options to not take our phones with
us to the bathroom or wherever we have
the option to not put our phone on the
table when we're in the social setting
we have the option to not even have our
phone with us when we're at like a party
or something right leave your phone at
home or leave your phone in the car or
whatever some people are going to defend
this and then say oh yeah but then but
what if I get a phone call okay sure
there might be some situations where you
might expect an important phone call but
there are probably also a lot of other
situations where you don't need your
phone in that very moment right there
probably plenty of situations in your
life where you don't need to have your
phone with you all the time I have my
phone with me here right now at this
very moment because I'm recording this
video but if I would have been recording
another video where I wasn't talking
about phones then why would my phone be
here in the room lying on the desk right
now right why would it always have to be
with us it doesn't have to be that way
we have the power to choose not to use
it all the
time and thinking about it like this
like we're doing right here in this
video
it really helps you to get that
perspective of just how much that thing
is messing you up and that will give you
the strength to choose not to use it all
the time anymore and you will realize
that putting your phone down a little
more is going to massively massively
improve your life overall putting your
phone down doesn't mean that you're
giving up on fun things some people
might think this right they might think
oh but you know I have fun on my phone
phone and I don't want to have less fun
well guess what it doesn't work that way
putting your phone down doesn't mean
that you'll have less fun it means that
you'll start to have more fun in life it
means that the fun thing the actual fun
things like playing games become more
fun again the total amount of fun in
your life will go up if you don't use
that thing all the time you will become
less depressed and less hateful towards
other people yes you might still have
different opinions and other people have
and you might still have morals and
judge other people for not having the
same morals as you have but you'll
become less hateful towards these other
people you'll no longer be like the
angry blackpilled incel that hates all
women for for being women right you'll
no longer hate everyone that has a
different political opinion as you have
you might still disagree with them yes
but you will no longer hate them as much
you'll actually start to like other
people again and feel driven to actually
spend time with other people and you'll
actually be able to enjoy hanging out
with other people again even if these
old people aren't 100% exactly the same
as you are and you might even get back
motivation to actually start working
towards your goals the goals that you've
been having for so long but could never
bring up the motivation to work to our
you might actually get that motivation
right
now oh all you have to do is put down
that phone again it's not easy it's
going to be a little bit of a
journey but at the same time it's not
hard either with the right mindset the
mindset that we're creating right here
right now realizing just what that thing
does to
us you have the strength to put that
thing
down I think that's all I have to say
for now boys see you in the next video
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