Teach girls bravery, not perfection | Reshma Saujani

Summary

Reshma Saujani shares her personal journey of running for Congress in 2012, a bold but unsuccessful bid that taught her the value of bravery over perfection. She highlights how girls are often socialized to avoid risk and seek perfection, while boys are encouraged to be brave. Saujani's experience inspired her to found Girls Who Code, an organization aimed at teaching young women to embrace imperfection and persevere through challenges. She advocates for fostering bravery in girls, which can lead to innovation, leadership, and a better future for everyone.

Takeaways

• 🚀 Reshma Saujani ran for Congress in 2012, stepping out of her comfort zone after years of being behind the scenes in politics.
• 🏆 Despite raising $1.3 million and receiving major media attention, she lost the race with only 19% of the vote.
• 👩‍💻 Reshma highlights that girls are often socialized to seek perfection, while boys are encouraged to be brave and take risks.
• 🧠 Studies show that bright girls tend to give up more quickly on difficult tasks than boys, despite outperforming boys academically.
• 💼 Women tend to apply for jobs only when they meet 100% of qualifications, while men apply if they meet just 60%.
• 💡 Reshma argues that the 'bravery deficit' holds women back from excelling in fields like STEM, where risk-taking is crucial.
• 👩‍🎓 In 2012, she founded 'Girls Who Code' to teach girls to embrace bravery and imperfection through coding.
• ⚙️ Coding requires perseverance, trial and error, and learning from failure, which helps girls overcome their fear of imperfection.
• 🌍 Girls who have learned to be brave have gone on to create impactful projects, including apps for social good and innovative tech solutions.
• 🎯 Reshma stresses the need to raise girls to be brave early on, not to seek perfection, so they can help build a better world.

Q & A

What motivated the speaker to run for Congress despite the odds?

The speaker wanted to make a difference and disrupt the status quo. She felt running for Congress was her way to do that, even though pollsters and others thought it was a risky or foolish decision.

Why does the speaker believe women are often less likely to take risks in their careers?

The speaker argues that women are socialized to be perfect from a young age, while boys are encouraged to take risks. This results in women being overly cautious and avoiding situations where they might fail or not be perfect.

How does the speaker contrast the behavior of boys and girls in challenging situations?

The speaker mentions that girls often give up quickly when faced with difficulty, while boys see challenging situations as opportunities and tend to redouble their efforts.

What is the 'bravery deficit' the speaker refers to?

The 'bravery deficit' refers to the lack of encouragement for girls to be brave and take risks, which leads to underrepresentation of women in fields like STEM, leadership roles, and other areas where taking risks is essential.

How does coding help girls develop bravery, according to the speaker?

Coding involves trial and error, requiring perseverance and acceptance of imperfection. This process helps girls become comfortable with making mistakes and builds their bravery.

What example does the speaker give to illustrate girls’ fear of imperfection in coding?

The speaker shares a story of a student who deletes her code because it isn’t perfect. Instead of showing her progress, she would rather present a blank screen, illustrating the fear of not getting it right.

What surprising behavior does the speaker note in girls struggling with coding assignments compared to boys?

When boys struggle, they tend to say, 'There's something wrong with my code,' while girls say, 'There's something wrong with me,' reflecting a deeper sense of personal inadequacy.

What impact does the speaker believe teaching girls bravery will have on society?

The speaker believes that teaching girls to be brave will lead them to pursue their dreams and solve important problems, driving innovation and benefiting the economy and society as a whole.

What are some examples of projects created by girls in the speaker’s coding program?

Examples include a game called Tampon Run to challenge menstruation taboos, an app to help Americans get to the polls created by a Syrian refugee, and an algorithm to help detect cancer created by a 16-year-old girl.

How has the speaker’s program, Girls Who Code, grown since it started in 2012?

Girls Who Code started with 20 girls in 2012 and has grown to teach 40,000 girls across all 50 U.S. states, partnering with major tech companies to embed coding classes in their offices.

Outlines

00:00

🚀 A Brave Step into Politics

The speaker reflects on a bold decision made years ago to run for Congress, despite having previously stayed in the background of political organizing and fundraising. She recounts challenging the long-standing congresswoman of her district in a 2012 race, despite overwhelming odds against her. Despite endorsements from major news outlets and raising significant funds, she lost with only 19% of the vote. This experience, while humbling, was not about failure—it was the first time she had taken a truly courageous step without the fear of imperfection.

05:00

💡 The Bravery Deficit in Women

The speaker discusses how women are often conditioned to strive for perfection, while men are encouraged to take risks and embrace failure. This socialization contributes to a 'bravery deficit' in women, particularly in areas like STEM and leadership roles. The speaker highlights the psychological differences in how boys and girls handle challenges, noting that boys see them as energizing while girls, despite outperforming boys in school, are more likely to give up when faced with difficulty. She points out that this deficit has widespread economic consequences, as women are underrepresented in key industries.

10:01

👩‍💻 Teaching Girls to Be Brave Through Coding

In 2012, the speaker founded an organization to teach girls how to code, which also indirectly taught them bravery through the trial-and-error nature of programming. She observes that many girls struggle with the fear of imperfection, often erasing their progress instead of showing their mistakes. She emphasizes the importance of teaching girls that coding is about perseverance and failure, not about getting everything right the first time. She notes that male students in computer science tend to believe that issues lie in their code, while female students often think the problem lies within themselves.

🛠 Breaking Perfectionism and Building Sisterhood

The speaker calls for breaking the cycle of perfectionism in women by creating a supportive sisterhood where girls feel empowered to be imperfect and take risks. She shares stories of young girls who have created impactful projects, such as games and apps, addressing societal issues like menstruation taboos, voter participation, and even cancer detection. These examples illustrate the potential of girls when they are taught to embrace imperfection and persist through challenges. She stresses that empowering girls to be brave early in life will help them achieve their dreams and contribute significantly to society.

🌍 Empowering Girls to Change the World

The speaker concludes by emphasizing the importance of teaching girls to be comfortable with imperfection in order to build a movement of courageous women who will shape the future. She encourages everyone to support young women in embracing imperfection and courage, as this will lead to innovation and progress in society. The speaker also highlights the growth of her coding program, which has expanded from teaching 20 girls in 2012 to 40,000 girls in all 50 states. She advocates for tech companies to integrate such programs to create more gender-balanced and innovative teams.

Keywords

💡Bravery Deficit

The 'bravery deficit' refers to the societal gap in encouraging girls to take risks and embrace failure. In the video, this concept is used to explain why women are underrepresented in high-risk fields like STEM and leadership roles. The speaker argues that girls are socialized to be perfect rather than brave, and this deficit holds back innovation and economic progress.

💡Perfection

Perfection is described as the societal expectation placed on girls to be flawless in their pursuits. This pressure prevents girls from taking risks or trying new things, as they fear failure or not meeting 100% of the qualifications. The speaker highlights that perfectionism hinders girls from reaching their potential, contrasting it with boys who are socialized to take risks and accept imperfection.

💡Risk-taking

Risk-taking is a core theme that contrasts how boys and girls are raised. Boys are encouraged to take risks, from jumping off monkey bars to pursuing difficult challenges. Girls, on the other hand, are taught to avoid risks to maintain perfection. The speaker emphasizes the need to socialize girls to embrace risk as a pathway to success and innovation.

💡STEM

STEM stands for Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math, fields in which women are significantly underrepresented. The speaker points out that the bravery deficit contributes to this underrepresentation because women hesitate to enter or pursue these fields without feeling perfectly qualified. The need for more women in STEM is connected to fostering greater innovation.

💡Socialization

Socialization refers to the process by which society shapes behaviors and attitudes. In the video, it is used to describe how girls are conditioned to be perfect, cautious, and risk-averse, while boys are taught to be brave and take chances. The speaker argues that this gendered socialization limits girls' potential and holds back societal progress.

💡Coding

Coding, the practice of writing computer programs, serves as a metaphor for bravery and imperfection in the video. The speaker’s initiative, 'Girls Who Code,' teaches girls to embrace failure and keep trying through coding, where trial and error are integral to success. Coding helps girls learn perseverance and become comfortable with imperfection.

💡Imperfect Progress

Imperfect progress is a concept that encourages girls to show their work, even when it’s not perfect. The speaker describes how many girls delete their code if it’s not flawless, fearing judgment. Imperfect progress highlights the importance of showing effort and improvement rather than seeking unattainable perfection, helping to reframe failure as part of learning.

💡Sisterhood

Sisterhood in the video refers to the supportive network of women and girls that encourages bravery and perseverance. The speaker stresses the importance of building a community that helps girls feel less alone in their struggles, which counters the perfectionism and fear of failure they often experience. This sisterhood is vital for fostering confidence and risk-taking.

💡Innovation

Innovation is tied to the idea that diverse perspectives, particularly from women, are essential for solving complex problems and driving economic growth. The speaker argues that by socializing girls to be brave rather than perfect, society will benefit from their contributions in fields like technology and science, leading to greater advancements.

💡Failure

Failure is framed as a natural and necessary part of learning and success, especially in high-risk fields like coding. The speaker challenges the stigma around failure, especially for girls, who are often taught to avoid it. By redefining failure as a step toward achievement, the speaker promotes a shift in how girls approach challenges and setbacks.

Highlights

The speaker ran for Congress in 2012, challenging a long-standing incumbent in New York City.

Despite predictions of failure from pollsters, she pursued the campaign to disrupt the status quo.

Although she only received 19 percent of the vote, the experience marked her first act of true bravery.

The speaker reflects on how girls are socialized to avoid risks and strive for perfection, while boys are encouraged to be brave.

The 'bravery deficit' is why women are underrepresented in fields like STEM, leadership roles, and Congress.

Research from psychologist Carol Dweck found that bright girls give up more easily when faced with difficult challenges compared to boys.

An HP study showed that men apply for jobs when they meet only 60% of the qualifications, but women apply only if they meet 100%.

The speaker believes women are socialized to seek perfection, making them more cautious and risk-averse in their careers.

In 2012, she founded 'Girls Who Code' to teach girls to be brave and learn from the trial-and-error process of coding.

Girls in coding programs often delete imperfect code rather than showing their progress, fearing imperfection.

Teaching girls to code helps them become more comfortable with failure and persistence.

Many women express fear of being the only one who struggles or doesn't understand something, reinforcing the need for supportive networks.

Girls from 'Girls Who Code' have built impactful projects, including a game addressing menstruation taboos and an app helping voters.

The speaker emphasizes that bravery, not perfection, is what will help women make significant contributions to society and innovation.

By 2018, 'Girls Who Code' had grown to teach 40,000 girls across all 50 U.S. states, supported by partnerships with leading tech companies.

Transcripts

So a few years ago,

I did something really brave,

or some would say really stupid.

I ran for Congress.

For years, I had existed safely behind the scenes in politics

as a fundraiser, as an organizer,

but in my heart, I always wanted to run.

The sitting congresswoman had been in my district since 1992.

She had never lost a race,

and no one had really even run against her in a Democratic primary.

But in my mind, this was my way

to make a difference,

to disrupt the status quo.

The polls, however, told a very different story.

My pollsters told me that I was crazy to run,

that there was no way that I could win.

But I ran anyway,

and in 2012, I became an upstart in a New York City congressional race.

I swore I was going to win.

I had the endorsement from the New York Daily News,

the Wall Street Journal snapped pictures of me on election day,

and CNBC called it one of the hottest races in the country.

I raised money from everyone I knew,

including Indian aunties

that were just so happy an Indian girl was running.

But on election day, the polls were right,

and I only got 19 percent of the vote,

and the same papers that said I was a rising political star

now said I wasted 1.3 million dollars

on 6,321 votes.

Don't do the math.

It was humiliating.

Now, before you get the wrong idea,

this is not a talk about the importance of failure.

Nor is it about leaning in.

I tell you the story of how I ran for Congress

because I was 33 years old

and it was the first time in my entire life

that I had done something that was truly brave,

where I didn't worry about being perfect.

And I'm not alone:

so many women I talk to tell me

that they gravitate towards careers and professions

that they know they're going to be great in,

that they know they're going to be perfect in,

and it's no wonder why.

Most girls are taught to avoid risk and failure.

We're taught to smile pretty,

play it safe, get all A's.

Boys, on the other hand,

are taught to play rough, swing high,

crawl to the top of the monkey bars and then just jump off headfirst.

And by the time they're adults,

whether they're negotiating a raise or even asking someone out on a date,

they're habituated to take risk after risk.

They're rewarded for it.

It's often said in Silicon Valley,

no one even takes you seriously unless you've had two failed start-ups.

In other words,

we're raising our girls to be perfect,

and we're raising our boys to be brave.

Some people worry about our federal deficit,

but I, I worry about our bravery deficit.

Our economy, our society, we're just losing out

because we're not raising our girls to be brave.

The bravery deficit is why women are underrepresented in STEM,

in C-suites, in boardrooms, in Congress,

and pretty much everywhere you look.

In the 1980s, psychologist Carol Dweck

looked at how bright fifth graders handled an assignment

that was too difficult for them.

She found that bright girls were quick to give up.

The higher the IQ, the more likely they were to give up.

Bright boys, on the other hand,

found the difficult material to be a challenge.

They found it energizing.

They were more likely to redouble their efforts.

What's going on?

Well, at the fifth grade level,

girls routinely outperform boys in every subject,

including math and science,

so it's not a question of ability.

The difference is in how boys and girls approach a challenge.

And it doesn't just end in fifth grade.

An HP report found that men will apply for a job

if they meet only 60 percent of the qualifications,

but women, women will apply

only if they meet 100 percent of the qualifications.

100 percent.

This study is usually invoked as evidence that, well,

women need a little more confidence.

But I think it's evidence

that women have been socialized to aspire to perfection,

and they're overly cautious.

(Applause)

And even when we're ambitious,

even when we're leaning in,

that socialization of perfection

has caused us to take less risks in our careers.

And so those 600,000 jobs that are open right now

in computing and tech,

women are being left behind,

and it means our economy is being left behind

on all the innovation and problems women would solve

if they were socialized to be brave

instead of socialized to be perfect.

(Applause)

So in 2012, I started a company to teach girls to code,

and what I found is that by teaching them to code

I had socialized them to be brave.

Coding, it's an endless process of trial and error,

of trying to get the right command in the right place,

with sometimes just a semicolon

making the difference between success and failure.

Code breaks and then it falls apart,

and it often takes many, many tries

until that magical moment

when what you're trying to build comes to life.

It requires perseverance.

It requires imperfection.

We immediately see in our program

our girls' fear of not getting it right,

of not being perfect.

Every Girls Who Code teacher tells me the same story.

During the first week, when the girls are learning how to code,

a student will call her over and she'll say,

"I don't know what code to write."

The teacher will look at her screen,

and she'll see a blank text editor.

If she didn't know any better, she'd think that her student

spent the past 20 minutes just staring at the screen.

But if she presses undo a few times,

she'll see that her student wrote code and then deleted it.

She tried, she came close,

but she didn't get it exactly right.

Instead of showing the progress that she made,

she'd rather show nothing at all.

Perfection or bust.

It turns out that our girls are really good at coding,

but it's not enough just to teach them to code.

My friend Lev Brie, who is a professor at the University of Columbia

and teaches intro to Java

tells me about his office hours with computer science students.

When the guys are struggling with an assignment,

they'll come in and they'll say,

"Professor, there's something wrong with my code."

The girls will come in and say,

"Professor, there's something wrong with me."

We have to begin to undo the socialization of perfection,

but we've got to combine it with building a sisterhood

that lets girls know that they are not alone.

Because trying harder is not going to fix a broken system.

I can't tell you how many women tell me,

"I'm afraid to raise my hand,

I'm afraid to ask a question,

because I don't want to be the only one

who doesn't understand,

the only one who is struggling.

When we teach girls to be brave

and we have a supportive network cheering them on,

they will build incredible things,

and I see this every day.

Take, for instance, two of our high school students

who built a game called Tampon Run --

yes, Tampon Run --

to fight against the menstruation taboo

and sexism in gaming.

Or the Syrian refugee

who dared show her love for her new country

by building an app to help Americans get to the polls.

Or a 16-year-old girl who built an algorithm

to help detect whether a cancer is benign or malignant

in the off chance that she can save her daddy's life

because he has cancer.

These are just three examples of thousands,

thousands of girls who have been socialized to be imperfect,

who have learned to keep trying, who have learned perseverance.

And whether they become coders

or the next Hillary Clinton or Beyoncé,

they will not defer their dreams.

And those dreams have never been more important for our country.

For the American economy, for any economy to grow,

to truly innovate,

we cannot leave behind half our population.

We have to socialize our girls to be comfortable with imperfection,

and we've got to do it now.

We cannot wait for them to learn how to be brave like I did

when I was 33 years old.

We have to teach them to be brave in schools

and early in their careers,

when it has the most potential to impact their lives

and the lives of others,

and we have to show them that they will be loved and accepted

not for being perfect

but for being courageous.

And so I need each of you to tell every young woman you know --

your sister, your niece, your employee, your colleague --

to be comfortable with imperfection,

because when we teach girls to be imperfect,

and we help them leverage it,

we will build a movement of young women who are brave

and who will build a better world for themselves

and for each and every one of us.

Thank you.

(Applause)

Thank you.

Chris Anderson: Reshma, thank you.

It's such a powerful vision you have. You have a vision.

Tell me how it's going.

How many girls are involved now in your program?

Reshma Saujani: Yeah. So in 2012, we taught 20 girls.

This year we'll teach 40,000 in all 50 states.

(Applause)

And that number is really powerful,

because last year we only graduated 7,500 women in computer science.

Like, the problem is so bad

that we can make that type of change quickly.

CA: And you're working with some of the companies in this room even,

who are welcoming graduates from your program?

RS: Yeah, we have about 80 partners,

from Twitter to Facebook

to Adobe to IBM to Microsoft to Pixar to Disney,

I mean, every single company out there.

And if you're not signed up, I'm going to find you,

because we need every single tech company

to embed a Girls Who Code classroom in their office.

CA: And you have some stories back from some of those companies

that when you mix in more gender balance

in the engineering teams, good things happen.

RS: Great things happen.

I mean, I think that it's crazy to me to think about the fact

that right now 85 percent of all consumer purchases are made by women.

Women use social media at a rate of 600 percent more than men.

We own the Internet,

and we should be building the companies of tomorrow.

And I think when companies have diverse teams,

and they have incredible women that are part of their engineering teams,

they build awesome things, and we see it every day.

CA: Reshma, you saw the reaction there. You're doing incredibly important work.

This whole community is cheering you on. More power to you. Thank you.

RS: Thank you.

(Applause)