5 Signs of Sociopathic Charm, Not Genuine

Psych2Go
5 Aug 202405:16

Summary

TLDRThis video script delves into the misconceptions about sociopaths, emphasizing they are not all malicious but use life skills to improve themselves. It highlights six signs of sociopathic charm: always saying what's correct, faking emotions, lacking real attachment, being charming with strangers, keeping others talking to learn about them, and using love bombing. The script clarifies that while sociopaths can be charming, it's essential not to jump to conclusions based on single traits and to consider other conditions that might affect social behavior.

Takeaways

  • 🧐 Socipaths are often misunderstood; they are people who use life skills to improve their lives, similar to anyone else.
  • 🔍 The term 'sociopath' is commonly used interchangeably with 'psychopath' due to shared characteristics, though it technically refers to those with antisocial personality disorder.
  • 🗣️ Sociopaths may appear charming by always saying what is correct, but this is a learned behavior rather than a genuine expression of empathy.
  • 🎭 Sociopaths can mimic emotions effectively, making them appear indistinguishable from neurotypical individuals in their emotional responses.
  • 🤔 A lack of real attachment is typical of sociopaths; they can be charming with anyone at any time, regardless of their actual feelings.
  • 💬 Sociopaths may keep the conversation focused on you, learning what you need to hear while appearing mysterious and engaging.
  • 🌟 They are adept at using compliments, or 'love bombing,' as a tool to make others feel good and open up to them.
  • 🔥💧 Sociopaths can play 'hot and cold' to manipulate your feelings, creating a sense of infatuation and need to prove your value to them.
  • 🤝 Charm is a tool sociopaths use to achieve their goals, whether in relationships or professional settings.
  • 👀 It's important not to jump to conclusions about someone being a sociopath based on a single trait or observation; other conditions can also cause performative behavior.
  • 👍 The video encourages viewers to reflect on their own behaviors and relationships, and to consider the possibility of sociopathic traits in a thoughtful manner.

Q & A

  • What is the common misconception about sociopaths according to the transcript?

    -The common misconception is that sociopaths are all ambitious, manipulative, and cruel. However, the transcript suggests that sociopaths are still just people who use their skills and life lessons to improve their lives, similar to anyone else.

  • How does the transcript describe the typical approach of sociopaths in interpersonal relationships?

    -The transcript describes sociopaths as having a unique way of navigating interpersonal relationships and socializing, which isn't always malicious but rather a way they have adapted.

  • What is the difference between a sociopath and a psychopath as mentioned in the transcript?

    -The term 'sociopath' usually applies to people with antisocial personality disorder, but it has been used interchangeably with 'psychopath' over time due to the many features they share.

  • What does the transcript say about the capacity for empathy in sociopaths?

    -The transcript cites a study that found sociopaths do have the capacity for empathy, but it isn't used automatically. Instead, their empathy has to be consciously turned on, which they rarely do because it usually isn't advantageous.

  • According to the transcript, how can one identify if someone's charm might be sociopathic?

    -The transcript suggests that if someone is always agreeing with you or appealing to your emotions without any counterargument, they may be using their sociopathic charm.

  • Why do sociopaths fake emotions, and how do they do it?

    -Sociopaths fake emotions because they lack a wellspring of emotions to draw from. They mirror other people and learn to apply the right emotion at the right time, becoming extremely adept at it.

  • What is the significance of the term 'love bombing' in the context of the transcript?

    -In the context of the transcript, 'love bombing' refers to the tactic sociopaths use where they shower someone with compliments and flattery to make them open up and feel endeared to the sociopath.

  • How does the transcript describe the 'hot and cold' behavior of sociopaths?

    -The 'hot and cold' behavior is described as a tactic where sociopaths, after hooking someone, may alternate between being very supportive and caring to being distant and unresponsive, to make the person more infatuated with them.

  • Why do sociopaths keep people talking about themselves?

    -Sociopaths keep people talking about themselves to learn what they need to hear or see in order to charm them. It also helps them come across as mysterious, which many people find attractive.

  • What is the importance of not assuming someone is a sociopath based on a single trait or observation, as per the transcript?

    -The importance lies in the fact that any disorder that might make someone struggle with social situations may give off a performative feeling. For example, people with Autism might also seem like they're performing, so it's crucial not to jump to conclusions based on limited information.

  • How can the charm of sociopaths be beneficial to them, according to the transcript?

    -The charm that sociopaths wield often helps them get what they want, whether it's relationships or promotions. They know how to use their charm to achieve their goals.

Outlines

00:00

🧐 Understanding Sociopaths: Beyond the Stereotype

This paragraph explores the misconceptions about sociopaths, emphasizing that they are individuals who adapt their behaviors based on life experiences, much like anyone else. It clarifies that sociopaths, often associated with antisocial personality disorder, may not always exhibit malicious intent in their social interactions. The paragraph delves into the unique way sociopaths navigate interpersonal relationships, which can sometimes be misinterpreted as charm. It also mentions the interchangeable use of the terms 'sociopath' and 'psychopath' due to shared characteristics. Key signs of sociopathic charm include saying what is correct without genuine empathy, as demonstrated by a study by Haron Maford, and the ability to mimic emotions effectively, which can make them appear indistinguishable from neurotypical individuals.

05:00

🤔 Recognizing Sociopathic Behavior: Charm or Calculus?

The second paragraph focuses on identifying the manipulative charm of sociopaths, who may not form genuine emotional attachments but instead use practiced behaviors to their advantage. It discusses the lack of a real attachment system in sociopaths, their ability to turn on charm at will, and their tendency to keep others talking to learn and charm them. The paragraph also highlights 'love bombing' as a tactic used by sociopaths to make people feel valued and open up. Additionally, it touches on the 'hot and cold' behavior pattern sociopaths may employ to increase their allure and control over others. The paragraph concludes by questioning the viewer if they have encountered such behaviors, inviting them to reflect on their own experiences and to engage with the content by liking and subscribing for more.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Sociopaths

Sociopaths are individuals with antisocial personality disorder characterized by a disregard for social norms and the rights of others. In the video, the term is used to explore the misconceptions and realities about sociopaths, emphasizing that they are not all malicious but use their skills to navigate social situations, which is central to the video's theme of challenging stereotypes.

💡Manipulative

Manipulative refers to the act of influencing someone by indirect or covert means, often for one's own advantage. The video discusses how sociopaths are often assumed to be manipulative, but it also points out that their behavior can be a result of adaptation rather than inherent malevolence.

💡Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. The script mentions that sociopaths have the capacity for empathy but do not use it automatically, which is a key point in understanding their social interactions and the video's exploration of their emotional capabilities.

💡Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD)

ASPD is a mental disorder characterized by a pervasive pattern of disregard for, and violation of, the rights of others. The video script uses this term to define the clinical background of what is commonly referred to as sociopathy, providing a basis for the discussion on sociopaths' behavior.

💡Charm

Charm, in this context, refers to the ability to influence or persuade others through pleasant or attractive traits. The video discusses how sociopaths may use charm in a calculated way, which is a central theme in understanding their social strategies.

💡Patrick Bateman

Patrick Bateman is a fictional character from the novel and film 'American Psycho,' known for his manipulative and psychopathic traits. The script uses him as an exaggerated example of a sociopath who can say the right things without genuine feeling, illustrating the concept of insincere charm.

💡Faking Emotions

Faking emotions refers to the act of displaying feelings that are not genuinely felt. The video explains that sociopaths may fake emotions to mirror others, which is a key part of their adaptability in social situations and a significant aspect of the video's message about their behavior.

💡Attachment System

An attachment system in the context of the video refers to the emotional bonds formed with others over time. It is mentioned that sociopaths do not form such bonds in the same way as others, which affects their ability to charm and connect with people.

💡Love Bombing

Love bombing is a manipulative tactic where someone showers another with excessive affection or attention to make them feel special and loved. The video describes how sociopaths may use this technique to endear themselves to others, which is a specific example of their manipulative charm.

💡Hot and Cold

The term 'hot and cold' describes a behavior pattern where someone alternates between being very attentive and then distant. The video explains that sociopaths may use this tactic to create a sense of uncertainty and infatuation in others, which is a part of their charm strategy.

💡Psychopathy

Psychopathy is a personality disorder characterized by persistent antisocial behavior, impaired empathy, and bold, disinhibited, and egotistical traits. The video script mentions psychopathy to highlight the shared features with sociopathy and to discuss the common misconceptions about these individuals.

Highlights

Sociopaths are often misunderstood and presumed to be ambitious, manipulative, and cruel, but they are still people who adapt and improve their lives like everyone else.

Sociopaths have a unique way of navigating interpersonal relationships and socializing, which isn't always malicious but a result of their adaptation.

The term 'sociopath' is often used interchangeably with 'psychopath' due to shared features, despite originally referring to antisocial personality disorder.

Sociopaths can consciously turn on empathy, but they rarely do as it's not usually advantageous for them.

They may say what is correct and agree with you to use their charm, as seen in the exaggerated example of Patrick Bateman's monologue in 'American Psycho'.

Sociopaths can fake emotions effectively, mirroring others and appearing indistinguishable from neurotypical people in their emotional responses.

A lack of a real attachment system is a sign of sociopathic charm; they can turn on charm with anyone at any time, unlike typical attachment-building.

Sociopaths benefit from keeping you talking, as it allows them to study and charm you while maintaining an air of mystery.

Love bombing, or excessive compliments, is a tool sociopaths use to make people open up and feel endeared to them.

The hot and cold game is a tactic sociopaths may use to make someone more infatuated, by alternating between support and withdrawal.

Sociopaths' charm is often a means to an end, helping them get what they want, whether it's relationships or promotions.

It's important not to assume someone is a sociopath based on a single trait or observation, as other disorders can also present performative behaviors.

People with Autism, for example, might also seem like they're performing in social situations, so it's crucial not to jump to conclusions.

Sociopaths may use their charm to seem invested in a conversation, even if they're carrying the conversation to learn more about you.

The video encourages viewers to reflect on whether they know someone who might be a sociopath or if they recognize some of these traits in themselves.

The video concludes by inviting viewers to like and subscribe for more content on psychological topics.

Transcripts

play00:00

there are a lot of presumptions we make

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about sociopaths many people assume

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they're all ambitious manipulative and

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cruel the truth is that sociopaths are

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still just people and like all other

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people they use the skills and lessons

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they learn in life to improve their

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lives that's a really simple way of

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looking at it but it applies to everyone

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whether you a sociopath or not when it

play00:20

comes to interpersonal relationships and

play00:22

socializing sociopaths have a unique way

play00:25

of navigating that landscape sometimes

play00:27

it isn't always malicious it's just the

play00:29

way they have adapted the term sociopath

play00:31

usually applies to people with

play00:33

antisocial personality disorder but over

play00:35

time it's been used interchangeably with

play00:38

Psychopaths because of the many features

play00:39

they share so these are the signs that

play00:41

someone's charm is not genuine but

play00:44

sociopathic number one they always say

play00:46

what is correct sociopaths don't always

play00:48

have robust social intelligence

play00:50

researcher Haron maford and colleagues

play00:52

published a study in brain that found

play00:54

sociopaths do have the capacity for

play00:56

empathy but it isn't used automatically

play00:59

their empathy has to be consciously

play01:00

turned on for them to use it which they

play01:02

rarely do because it usually isn't

play01:04

advantageous instead of empathizing

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sociopaths will know what they're

play01:08

supposed to say and we'll say what you

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want to hear what is correct if you find

play01:11

that someone is always agreeing with you

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or appealing to your emotions without

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any counterargument they may be using

play01:17

their sociopathic charm if you want an

play01:19

exaggerated example think of Patrick

play01:21

Batman's monologue in American Psycho

play01:23

where he describes how important it is

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to end world hunger and apartheid even

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though we know he doesn't actually care

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about any of the noble causes he talks

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about he knows it's the right thing to

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say in front of the people he Associates

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himself with most Psychopaths and

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sociopaths aren't murderous monsters

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like Patrick baitman but it's hard to

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find examples of sociopaths in books TV

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shows and movies that don't involve

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murder number two fake emotions they

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don't just say the right things they

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have to fake emotions too without a

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Wellspring of emotions to draw from they

play01:53

have to mirror other people they learn

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this from a young age and become

play01:56

extremely adapt at applying the right

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emotion at the right time they can

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pretend to be riled up over something

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they say they aren't passionate about

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and they can cry over something they

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couldn't care less about they might act

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like they're completely infatuated with

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you if they think that's what will charm

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you or they'll act disinterested if they

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think that will Intrigue you more

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despite not truly feeling emotions

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sociopaths are able to respond to

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emotion so effectively that they are

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indistinguishable from neurotypical

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people a study measuring the facial

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responsiveness of psychopaths to the

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emotional responsiveness of others found

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that there is almost no difference in

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how people with aspd respond compared to

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NE typical people if you get the feeling

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that what someone is saying or doing

play02:33

feels performed they might have

play02:34

sociopathic traits but sociopaths are

play02:37

relatively rare any disorder that might

play02:39

make someone struggle with social

play02:40

situations may give off a performative

play02:42

feeling people with Autism for example

play02:45

might also seem like they're performing

play02:47

therefore it's important not to assume

play02:48

that someone is a sociopath based on a

play02:50

single trait or

play02:52

observation number three a lack of a

play02:54

real attachment system usually we build

play02:56

an attachment system with our friends

play02:58

and family over time we can be more

play03:00

Charming in front of people we're

play03:01

comfortable with sociopaths don't form

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attachment systems like that because

play03:05

their charm is practiced and

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performative they can turn on the charm

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with anyone at any time if someone is

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weirdly Charming with you even though

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you don't know them they could be trying

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to use a learn type of charm it's

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important to keep in mind that not

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everyone is naturally charming and

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people can learn how to use their hands

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and body language when they speak to

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come across as more charismatic

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sociopaths may do it constantly and

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consciously number four they keep you

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talking a sociopath can benefit from

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allowing you to do all the Talking it

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gives them something to play off of and

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study they will learn what you need to

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hear or see in order for them to charm

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you but it has the added benefit of

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making them come across as mysterious

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which many people find attractive they

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keep information about themselves to

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themselves if you find yourself doing

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all of the talking you might start to

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feel annoyed that you're carrying the

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conversation but sociopaths know how to

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keep you talking and how to seem

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invested one way they can keep you

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talking is through number five love

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bombing everyone knows compliments feel

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really good when I say everyone I mean

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everyone including sociopaths they know

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that compliments and flattery can make

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people open up to them for neurotypical

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people receiving compliments make us

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want to share compliments we understand

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how warm it makes us feel inside and it

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encourages us to get along with the

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people that compliment us for sociopaths

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Compliments are just another tool that

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they can use to endear themselves to

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whoever they're speaking to so if you

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feel like you're being Pand or to the

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person you're talking to may be trying

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to get you to warm up to them in a

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calculated soci cathic way number six

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hot and cold once a sociopath knows that

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they have you hooked they might play the

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hot and cold game with you to make you

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more infatuated with them sometimes

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they'll be the best person ever

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supporting you through whatever you need

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inviting you out and making you feel

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like they care about you then out of

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nowhere they won't answer your messages

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and you're worried that they don't like

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you anymore now you feel as though you

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have to prove your value to them this

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isn't real charm they've just tricked

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you into seeing them as something they

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aren't the charm that sociopaths can

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wield often helps them get what they

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want whether it's relationships or

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promotions they know how to get it is

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there someone in your life that you

play05:05

suspect might be a sociopath have you

play05:07

caught yourself doing some of these if

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you enjoyed this video let us know by

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leaving a like remember to subscribe to

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psych to go for more videos like this

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Etiquetas Relacionadas
SociopathyManipulationEmpathySocial SkillsPsychopathyInterpersonalCharm TacticsEmotional MimicryPersonality DisorderBehavioral Traits
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