Being Human in a Digital Age | Joel Comm | TEDxMileHigh

Summary

The speaker shares a personal journey of pain and addiction stemming from his parents' divorce, leading to the breakdown of his marriage. He discusses the paradox of connection and isolation in the digital age, highlighting the importance of authenticity and conscientiousness in social media interactions. The talk emphasizes the impact of honesty and vulnerability in building real connections and the potential of technology as a tool for positive change.

Takeaways

• 😢 The speaker shares a personal story of pain and loss from his parents' divorce and subsequent addictions, highlighting the impact of unresolved emotional trauma.
• 🔒 The concept of shame and the power of secrets are discussed, showing how keeping secrets can both empower and burden individuals.
• 🌐 The speaker introduces the idea of sharing secrets through platforms like postsecret.com, emphasizing the human desire to share and be heard.
• 😂 Humor is used to illustrate the disconnect between online personas and real-life behaviors, as seen in the shared postcards and social media antics.
• 📱 The paradox of being more connected yet less genuinely connected due to social media is explored, questioning the authenticity of online interactions.
• 🎭 The role of technology in allowing people to create and curate their online identities is examined, noting the potential for both positive and negative impacts.
• 🐾 The speaker uses dogshaming.com as an example of a platform that encourages honesty and vulnerability, suggesting a lesson for humans on authenticity.
• 👓 Robert Scoble's courageous act of sharing his past trauma on social media and the positive response he received is highlighted, demonstrating the power of authenticity in connecting with others.
• 📱 The speaker discusses the misuse of technology and social media due to a lack of understanding and the potential harm caused by online aggression and judgment.
• 👐 The importance of conscientiousness and awareness in using technology and social media authentically is emphasized, as well as the impact this has on future generations.
• 🤳 In conclusion, the speaker calls for authenticity in the digital age, urging the audience to embrace their humanity and use technology to connect genuinely with others.

Q & A

What significant event in the speaker's life led to a lot of pain and concern?

The speaker's parents getting divorced when they were 12 years old led to a lot of pain, concern, and loss.

How did the speaker cope with the emotional turmoil from their parents' divorce?

The speaker coped by finding both healthy and unhealthy ways to manage their emotions, with the unhealthy ways leading to various addictions.

What addictions did the speaker develop as a result of their emotional struggles?

The speaker developed addictions to workaholism, food, video games, drugs, and pornography.

How did the speaker's addictions and emotional struggles affect their marriage?

The speaker's addictions and emotional struggles contributed to dysfunction in their marriage, ultimately leading to their wife leaving after 22 years.

What does the speaker suggest about the power of secrets and shame?

The speaker suggests that there is power in keeping secrets and that shame is associated with the secrets we carry, which can be a barrier to sharing and healing.

What is the purpose of the website postsecret.com mentioned in the script?

Postsecret.com is a website where people can anonymously share their secrets and pain by submitting postcards, providing an opportunity for them to express themselves without revealing their identity.

How does the speaker describe the paradox of being more connected yet feeling disconnected in the digital age?

The speaker describes the paradox by pointing out that despite being more connected through technology, people often put up a good front and share only positive aspects of their lives, which can lead to a lack of genuine connection and understanding.

What is the significance of the story about Elan Gale and the fake Twitter story during a flight?

The story of Elan Gale illustrates how easily people can be misled by stories on social media, and it raises questions about the authenticity of content online.

What lesson does the speaker draw from the website dogshaming.com?

The speaker suggests that the honesty and vulnerability displayed by the dog owners on dogshaming.com can serve as a lesson for humans to be more authentic and open about their own mistakes and flaws.

What personal revelation did Robert Scoble share with his social media followers, and what was the impact?

Robert Scoble shared that he was sexually molested as a child, which led to a connection with his followers and an understanding of his adult dependencies. It also inspired him to join an AA program and remain sober.

How does the speaker define conscientiousness as a key to success in various aspects of life?

Conscientiousness is defined as being aware of who you are, acknowledging your past mistakes and flaws, knowing your boundaries, having the grit to persist, and respecting others, which contributes to success in life, relationships, and personal growth.

What is the speaker's final call to action regarding the use of technology and social media?

The speaker calls for authenticity in the use of technology and social media, encouraging individuals to show up as their real, raw selves to maintain humanity and avoid losing connection with others.