Grief Counselling: 3 Techniques Therapists Can Use

Summary

Matt Terrell from Uncommon Knowledge discusses three techniques for grief counseling. He emphasizes the importance of allowing bereaved individuals to talk about their deceased loved ones, distinguishing grief from trauma, and addressing guilt associated with the grieving process. Terrell suggests using the rewind technique to help clients process traumatic memories and proposes the idea of 'grieving days' as a structured way to honor the deceased, ultimately guiding clients towards a fulfilling future.

Takeaways

• 😢 **Grief is Natural**: Grieving the death of a loved one is a natural process and not pathological.
• 🤔 **Individual Grief Experiences**: People experience grief differently, and there's no set order for the emotions they feel.
• 🗣️ **Encourage Open Discussion**: Allowing clients to talk about the deceased can be therapeutic and help them process their grief.
• 🧠 **Distinguish Grief from Trauma**: It's crucial to help clients separate their grief from any traumatic memories associated with the death.
• ⏮️ **Rewind Technique**: Using the rewind technique can assist in desensitizing traumatic memories to allow for healthy grieving.
• 🚫 **Addressing Guilt**: Guilt is common in grief; counselors should help clients navigate this and understand it's okay to live fully.
• 🏋️‍♂️ **Rest as Part of Healing**: Resting and taking breaks from grieving can improve the quality of one's ability to grieve and remember.
• 📅 **Grieving Rituals**: Establishing rituals or designated grieving days can provide structured outlets for grief.
• 🔄 **Transitioning to the Future**: Helping clients to look towards the future and embrace the present is an important part of grief counseling.
• 👋 **Client Support**: The role of a counselor is to support clients in their grief journey without pathologizing their experiences.

Q & A

What is the main theme of the video script by Matt Terrell?

The main theme of the video script is providing guidance on how to approach grief counseling effectively, offering techniques to support individuals who are grieving.

Why does Matt Terrell quote Ralph Waldo Emerson in the script?

Matt Terrell quotes Ralph Waldo Emerson to emphasize that death makes everyone equal and can bring out the child in all of us, highlighting the universality of grief and the importance of not avoiding discussions about death.

What is the societal issue Matt Terrell addresses regarding grief?

Matt Terrell addresses the societal issue that death is often a taboo subject, leading to people feeling awkward or avoiding those who are grieving, which can exacerbate their feelings of isolation.

How does Matt Terrell define grief in the context of the video?

Matt Terrell defines grief as a natural part of life, not a pathological condition, and emphasizes that it should not be pathologized. He suggests that grief only becomes a concern if it does not start to diminish after some months.

What is the first grief counseling technique Matt Terrell suggests?

The first grief counseling technique Matt Terrell suggests is to let the bereaved talk about the deceased, encouraging them to share memories, likes, dislikes, and even weaknesses of the person they've lost.

Why is it important to distinguish grief from trauma according to Matt Terrell?

Matt Terrell emphasizes distinguishing grief from trauma because if someone is stuck in the trauma stage, the natural processes of grief cannot begin. He suggests helping clients by de-traumatizing memories associated with the death.

What is the rewind technique mentioned by Matt Terrell?

The rewind technique is a method Matt Terrell suggests to help clients deal with traumatic memories of the deceased's death, allowing them to move past the trauma and begin the grieving process.

How does Matt Terrell address the issue of guilt in the grieving process?

Matt Terrell addresses guilt by suggesting that the best way to honor a deceased person's life is to live fully oneself and by explaining that it's natural and necessary to have breaks from grieving to remember the person better at other times.

What is the concept of a 'grieving day' as proposed by Matt Terrell?

A 'grieving day' is a concept where individuals set aside a predetermined date or part of a day to focus on their lost loved one, looking at pictures or honoring their life in a meaningful way, which can help organize and control the grieving process.

What is the final message Matt Terrell conveys to viewers about grief counseling?

Matt Terrell's final message is that grief counseling should help individuals find a balance, allowing them to honor their past while also embracing the present and looking towards a productive and fulfilling future.