7 Methods of Killing Racial Gaslighting
Summary
TLDRDieses Videodiskussionsskript beleuchtet das Phänomen der rassistischen Gaslighting, eine Form der psychologischen Misshandlung, die verwendet wird, um Personen dazu zu bringen, ihre Wahrnehmung von Realität oder Erinnerungen zu hinterfragen. Es untersucht, wie diese Praxis, die oft als Werkzeug der weißen Vormachtstellung dient, die Selbstwahrnehmung und das Wohlbefinden von Menschen mit afroamerikanischem, einheimischem oder anderweitigem Hintergrund untergräbt. Die GesprächspartnerInnen, Dr. Kathomigaturi und Rudy Milnor, diskutieren die Auswirkungen von rassistischer Gaslighting auf das psychologische Wohlbefinden und geben Empfehlungen, wie man sich selbst in solchen Situationen behaupten und seine rassische Würde bewahren kann.
Takeaways
- 😌 Gaslighting ist eine Form der psychologischen Misshandlung, bei der Personen in Zweifel über ihre Wahrnehmung und Erinnerungen gebracht werden.
- 🌐 Racial Gaslighting bezieht sich auf die Ableugnung oder Erklärung von Rassismuserfahrungen von Menschen mit Migrationshintergrund oder Farbe durch andere.
- 🏛️ Es dient als Werkzeug von weißer Überlegenheit, um eine Rassenhierarchie beizubehalten, die Weißsein als Ideal aufstellt.
- 🔗 Racial Gaslighting und Mikroaggressionen sind eng verbunden und beide sind Werkzeuge der weißen Suprematie.
- 👩🔬 Rudy Milnor, eine Afroamerikanerin und Doktorandin, erlebt Racial Gaslighting häufig in ihrem akademischen Umfeld und als Modell.
- 🗣️ In professionellen Umgebungen ist es oft schwierig, über Racial Gaslighting zu sprechen, da es von Kollegen abgetan oder ignoriert wird.
- 🤝 Um sich vor Gaslighting zu schützen, kann es hilfreich sein, mit vertrauenswürdigen Personen über die Erfahrungen zu sprechen und diese aufzuzeichnen.
- 🧘♀️ Es ist wichtig, die eigene Rassenwürde zu bewahren und nicht die Verantwortung zu übernehmen, Racial Gaslighting zu stoppen, da es ein Produkt von Systemrassismus ist.
- 👥 Auch Schwarze und Menschen anderer Farben können einander Racial Gaslighting betreiben, was auf die Internalisierung von weißer Hegemonie zurückzuführen ist.
- 🌱 Um gegen Racial Gaslighting vorzugehen, sollte man aufklären, über Rassismus und seine Geschichte informieren und die Notwendigkeit der Solidarität und des gegenseitigen Verständnisses betonen.
Q & A
Was ist Gaslighting?
-Gaslighting ist eine Form der psychologischen Misshandlung, bei der eine Person oder Gruppe jemanden dazu bringt, seine Wahrnehmung von Realität oder Erinnerungen in Frage zu stellen, was zu Verunsicherung, Angst und dem Gefühl führt, verrückt oder überreagiert zu sein.
Woher kommt der Begriff 'Gaslighting'?
-Der Begriff stammt aus dem Film 'Gaslight', in dem ein Mann seine Frau manipuliert, indem er ihr sagt, sie hätte eine psychische Erkrankung, indem er die Gaslichter in ihrem Haus dimmern lässt und ihr sagt, sie würde sich das alles nur einbilden.
Was ist racial gaslighting?
-Racial gaslighting ist eine Form von Gaslighting, bei der Schwarze, Indigene oder andere Menschen mit einer anderen Hautfarbe ihre Erfahrungen von Rassismus in Frage gestellt oder als unrealistisch dargestellt werden, um ihre Rassenerfahrungen zu leugnen oder zu erklären.
Wie ist racial gaslighting mit Mikroaggressionen verbunden?
-Racial gaslighting und Mikroaggressionen sind beide Werkzeuge von weißer Überlegenheit und haben denselben Zweck, nämlich die Erfahrungen von rassifizierten Menschen zu minimieren und Respektlosigkeit zu kommunizieren.
Wie kann man erkennen, ob man Opfer von racial gaslighting ist?
-Man kann racial gaslighting erkennen, wenn man nach einer Interaktion unerhört, verwirrt, wütend oder respektlos behandelt fühlt, ohne jedoch genau sagen zu können, was passiert ist.
Was ist die beste Strategie, um sich selbst vor racial gaslighting zu schützen?
-Es ist wichtig, sich an Vertrauenspersonen zu wenden, die eine externe Perspektive auf die Situation bieten, und diese Interaktionen zu dokumentieren, um zu beweisen, dass man nicht die Dinge aus der Luft greift.
Wie kann man racial gaslighting bekämpfen?
-Um racial gaslighting zu bekämpfen, sollte man seine eigene Rassiewürde bewahren, indem man sich nicht von der Leugnung seiner Erfahrungen durch andere unterkriegt und sich auf die eigenen Erfahrungen und die Gemeinschaften konzentriert, die seine Erfahrungen bestätigen.
Was sind die langfristigen Auswirkungen von racial gaslighting auf die psychische Gesundheit?
-Langfristige Auswirkungen von racial gaslighting können Isolation, Internierung von Rassismus, vermindertes Selbstwertgefühl, Angst, Schuld und Wut sowie physische Symptome wie chronische Krankheiten und Stress haben.
Wie kann man racial gaslighting auflösen?
-Um racial gaslighting aufzulösen, sollte man sich selbst und anderen über die Geschichte und die Auswirkungen von Rassismus aufklären, Verantwortung übernehmen und lernen, wie man ohne Rassismus lebt, und die eigene und anderer Würde achten.
Was ist die Botschaft hinter dem Konzept der 'ubuntu' in Bezug auf racial gaslighting?
-Das Konzept der 'ubuntu' besagt, dass wir durch die Humanisierung anderer selbst menschlicher werden. Es betont die Bedeutung der Anerkennung und Wertschätzung der Würde anderer, um eine gesunde und respektvolle Gesellschaft zu schaffen.
Outlines
🔍 Gaslighting und rassistische Gaslighting
Dr. Kathomigaturi und Rudy Milnor, eine Doktorandin der Universität von Sydney, erklären Gaslighting als eine Form der psychologischen Misshandlung, bei der eine Person oder Gruppe jemanden dazu bringt, ihre Wahrnehmung von Realität oder Erinnerungen zu bezweifeln. Sie diskutieren rassistische Gaslighting als eine Form von emotionaler Misshandlung, bei der Rassismuserfahrungen von Menschen mit dunkler Hautfarbe oder indigenen Völkern bestritten oder als unwichtig abgetan werden. Dies dient dazu, die Macht und Kontrolle von Weißsein oder Weißer Suprematie aufrechtzuerhalten.
👩💼 Persönliche Erfahrungen mit rassistischem Gaslighting
Die Sprecherin, eine schwarze Frau, erzählt von ihren täglichen Erfahrungen mit rassistischem Gaslighting in ihrem Forschungsinstitut, wo sie als einzige Person ihrer Gruppe steht. Sie beschreibt, wie ihre Kolleginnen und Kollegen ihre Gefühle und Erfahrungen abwerten und ignorieren, was wiederum zu einer Zweifel an ihrer eigenen Wahrnehmung führt. Sie spricht auch von ihren Erfahrungen als Model, wo sie als laut und aggressiv wahrgenommen wird, wenn sie sich für ihre Rechte einsetzt.
🤔 Wie man seine rassische Würde bewahrt
Die Sprecherin reflektiert über die Herausforderungen, die Schwarze, Indigene und andere Menschen mit dunkler Hautfarbe in einer Welt mit rassistischer Hierarchie und Weißsein als Standard bewältigen müssen. Sie betont, dass es nicht die Aufgabe dieser Personen ist, rassistische Gaslighting zu stoppen, sondern ihre eigene Würde und Identität zu bewahren. Sie spricht darüber, wie wichtig es ist, diese Erfahrungen nicht persönlich zu nehmen und sich auf die Strukturen zu konzentrieren, die diese Missachtung erzeugen.
🙅♀️ Gegen rassistische Gaslighting vorgehen
Die Sprecherin teilt Strategien, wie man sich gegen rassistische Gaslighting wehren kann, indem man sein Gefühl vertraut, nicht davor zurückschreckt, über das Erlebnis zu sprechen, und nicht die Schuld für das Auftreten von Gaslighting übernimmt. Sie zitiert Jacqueline Yama, die drei Schlüsselempfehlungen gibt, um sich selbst zu schützen: Nicht jemandem glauben, der nicht die gleichen Erfahrungen hat, nicht sich mit Leuten auseinandersetzen, die sich mehr um ihren 'guten' Ruf als um Anti-Rassismus kümmern, und nicht darauf bestehen, dass jemand anerkennt, dass etwas rassistisch war.
👥 Gemeinschaftliche Verantwortung und Lösungsansätze
Die Sprecherin fordert dazu auf, rassistische Gaslighting nicht als individuelles Problem zu sehen, sondern als eine Struktur, die von der Gesellschaft unterstützt wird. Sie betont die Notwendigkeit, über Rassismus zu lernen, die Geschichte von Rassismus zu verstehen und sich aktiv gegen rassistische Praktiken einzusetzen. Sie gibt Empfehlungen, wie man sich selbst und andere von rassistischen Vorurteilen und Gaslighting befreien kann, und betont die Bedeutung der Solidarität und des gegenseitigen Verständnisses.
🌐 Bildung und Verständnis als Schlüssel zur Befreiung
Die Sprecherin schlägt vor, rassistische Gaslighting zu bekämpfen, indem man sich durch Bildung und das Anerkennen der Geschichte von Rassismus stärkt. Sie betont, dass es wichtig ist, über die Auswirkungen von Rassismus zu sprechen und zu lernen, um zu verstehen, wie man sich gegen diese Form von Missachtung und Misshandlung wehren kann. Sie fordert dazu auf, sich nicht von der Schuld oder dem Defensivsein ablenken zu lassen, sondern sich auf die Verbesserung und den Aufbau einer gerechteren Gesellschaft zu konzentrieren.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Gaslighting
💡Rassengaslighting
💡Mikroaggressionen
💡Rassenspezifische Anfeindungen
💡Rassenspezifische Gleichgültigkeit
💡Rassenspezifische Erschöpfung
💡Rassenspezifische Würde
💡Anti-Rassismus
💡Interne Rassismus
💡Rassenspezifische Gleichheit
Highlights
Dr. Kathomigaturi introduces herself as a psychotherapist and founder of Healing Together Psychotherapy.
Rudy Milnor identifies as a PhD candidate at the University of Sydney, focusing on colorectal cancer research.
Gaslighting is defined as a form of psychological abuse that manipulates one's perception of reality.
The term 'gaslighting' originates from a movie where a husband manipulates his wife into doubting her sanity.
Racial gaslighting is experienced when people of color are told their experiences of racism are not valid.
Racial gaslighting is described as a tool of white supremacy used to maintain racial hierarchy.
Rudy discusses the similarity between racial gaslighting and microaggressions, both stemming from white supremacy.
Personal experience of racial gaslighting as the only black woman in a research institute.
The dismissal of racial gaslighting by colleagues is highlighted as a form of gaslighting itself.
Racial gaslighting's impact on mental health, including feelings of isolation and internalized racism.
Strategies for coping with racial gaslighting, such as seeking support from trusted individuals.
The importance of not taking on the responsibility for stopping racial gaslighting, but maintaining racial dignity.
The concept of racial battle fatigue and its long-term impacts on the mental health of black people.
Advice from Jacqueline Yama on how black, indigenous, and people of color should respond to racial gaslighting.
The role of education in addressing racial gaslighting and the history of racism.
Personal recommendations for combating racial gaslighting, including listening without defensiveness and acknowledging consequences.
Transcripts
[Music]
my name is dr kathomigaturi
i am a senior academic and a
psychotherapist
and the founder of healing together
psychotherapy
everyone my name is rudy milnor my
pronouns
are she and her i am a phd candidate at
the university of sydney
focused on colorectal cancer research
hey bobby
let the face go gaslighting
is a form of psychological abuse where
a person or a group makes
someone or members of another group
question their perception of reality
or memories so these experiences leave
people
feeling you know confused anxious
unable to trust themselves or feeling
like
they're crazy or overreacting
so the time gas lighting actually is a
pop culture reference
which comes from a movie called gaslight
where
a husband manipulates his wife into
thinking that she has a mental illness
by dimming their blood and their
gas-filled lights and telling her that
she's imagining it
and she starts to think that she's
actually hallucinating
and that she's crazy racial gas
lighting um is when black indigenous or
other people of color who experience
institutional um or interpersonal racism
are told that their experiences
are not true that it's in their heads
that they're making a fuss off of
something that is not
a big deal um so
this is when ratio experiences are
denied or explained away by others
so it's a form of emotional
abuse and it's actually an insidious
tool that is used to manipulate
people into that doubting their own
racial experiences
in order for whiteness or white
supremacy to maintain its power and
control
so the way that i think about racial gas
lighting is almost
to think of it as a tool of white
supremacy
that functions to maintain a way of
racial hierarchy
that defaults to whiteness as an ideal
so the more black indigenous and people
of color resist
this default standard of whiteness as
the norm
the more they are faced with resistance
with backlash with denial
and with more violence because whiteness
as as the standard is trying to protect
itself
and retain its power in that ratio
hierarchy platform
[Music]
i don't think there's a huge difference
between ratio gas lighting
and microaggressions because i think
they're
born from the same platform
they are both tools of white supremacy
and they function to play the same role
which is to minimize um
and to communicate a pattern of put
downs and disrespect towards
racially minoritized people so
you know ratio gas lighting might look
like microaggressions it might look like
micro invalidations
it might look like micro insults it
might look like
micro assaults it might look like micro
suspicions and it might also look like
micro you know burdens of the things
that black people have to wear
and to carry just by existing with a
black body
so i think these two are you know two
sides of the same coin but really they
have the same parent
and the same parent is why supremacy
they just function to minoritize
and they function to invalidate
and to communicate very subtle
but hostile ratio slides
so i don't know how i can separate them
rather than see them
basically as twins in this conversation
[Music]
experience racial gaslighting almost
every day
to start off i am the only black
person black woman specifically
in my research institute so
i already stick out like a sore thumb
anytime i'll rock up with a new
hairstyle or
looking a little bit you know you know
colorful or what have you
i get comments here and there about it
the people in my professional field
always try to dismiss
the way i feel and i don't think they
realize it
it's just that you know they're not
black they don't understand my struggles
so
if i want to talk to a colleague about
some sort of microaggression or
an instance where i've been gaslit they
don't understand and they dismiss it and
that in itself
is gaslighting me making me question
whether
or not i am justified and feeling the
way that i feel
and it's not just in you know my
professional field
where i have an extensive body of work
to support who i am and why i deserve to
be there but
i also am assigned model and
that's where i really experience a lot
of racial gas lighting
people expect models to be
timid and quiet but the second i
speak up and you know
let's call out what's wrong i'm seen as
loud and aggressive and ungrateful when
i'm just asking for the
bare minimum
[Music]
so to save myself from situations like
this it
depends on what the situation is if i'm
at work
i'm around academics and people who
have you know degrees and doctorates and
what have you
i have to bite my tongue it
really sucks that i have to bite my
tongue but i have no choice because
like i previously said people look at
black women in a certain kind of way if
i'm calling out
racial gaslighting or any form of
discrimination
i'm the one who's problematic
[Music]
so when i'm in the lab and
you know something's bothering me and i
want to talk about it i just can't
it's a shame because i don't
find friends in that industry
all my friends come from outside
you know in creative environments
because they
are like me they look like me they have
similar struggles
and that's not to say that there aren't
black people or people of color in
the medical industry it's just that i
don't get to interact with them
so i have to bite my tongue when it
comes to that
in social settings it's different i'm
the first to pop off because
i know that there's nothing really at a
stake there
and the fact that i can't really speak
out
in my work environment is upsetting
if i'm out at an event for a party with
people and
there is something that isn't sitting
right with me i am the first to speak up
about it
and i'm almost disappointed in myself
for
not allowing myself to
be vocal and to stand up against any
racial discrimination or gaslighting
at work but i can't afford to
and most black people can't afford to do
so either
[Music]
often you can tell you're being ghastly
if you leave an exchange or an
interaction feeling completely unheard
confused angry disrespected
but really not being able to still put a
finger on it you just
live there feeling completely dissented
not really knowing whether you're
imagining it
or whether it's in your head so talking
to a trusted person
with an outside perspective on the
situation will help to validate that
you're not imagining things
um it might also help if you can create
an
external or record these interactions so
that
um as soon as they happen so that you
know that you're not imagining them
but having said that i
don't think you can stop stop
being ghastly in a collective context
where
racism is the bedrock that unconsciously
informs so many organizational
institutional
and the ordering of things what i think
is a better
question to ask in my opinion is how can
you retain your ratio
dignity in the face of constant
denial that your experiences your racial
experiences
are um are true
so um so that's the question to think
about is how do you retain your racial
dignity in the face of so much denial
and so much minimization of your
experience
so i guess what i want to say here and
particularly speaking to black
indigenous and people of color
is to know that it's not necessarily
their responsibility to
stop bus lighting from happening it's
not
really a problem that you created
and it's not really your responsibility
to stop it per se
in fact feeling like it's your
responsibility to stop this
creates um an unnecessary racial burden
ratio fatigue of having to think
constantly about how you navigate this
dynamics it's almost like
you have to learn the skills of putting
out a fire that you didn't
ignite instead what i want you to think
about this is
is de personalize it and think about it
more contextually which is
black people indigenous people and other
people of color
are more likely to experience this um
as a reality of their lives and
due to the structuring of whiteness as
the default
the standard way of being there is an
assumption
an unspoken assumption that black people
are overly emotional sensitive
irrational about race
or make everything about race when
actually
black people didn't create the
structures of racial hierarchy
that harm them so when the people who
benefit from this hierarchy
turn around and say it's the people who
didn't create this hierarchy that are
overreacting i want you to see that
for what it is that you're being
gaslighted
um and these assumptions that black
people
and people of color are sensitive about
race
provides an excuse to dismiss their
feelings and experiences of racism
so i don't think it's your
responsibility to stop it but i think
it's your responsibility
to maintain your racial dignity in the
face of it
oh black people and people color can
absolutely gaslight each other have you
heard of
candace owens that woman
is something different but um
yes black people people of color can
gaslight each other
it's funny because i almost i i see
gaslighting
i i experience gaslighting more with
people of color
rather than black people because there's
a very very
big difference between being black and
being a person of color
um society is built well society has
been structured in a way where people of
color
can benefit from whiteness or are you
know they're closer in proximity to
being white
so when i try to explain to a person of
color that
something has made me feel uncomfortable
the
more more often than not the response
that i get is well
are you sure well did you say something
that could have
maybe resulted in this so
yeah it's very much possible and i can
get that from black people as well
um and it comes from this fear of trying
to fit in
black people people of color have to
pipe down and make themselves feel small
and mold themselves
to make white people feel comfortable
that's where where you can see racial
gaslighting yeah so sometimes um
you know black people or people of color
can ask you well are you sure it was
about race
are you sure that you're feeling this
way because you're black and it's not
because of something else that you did
no it's most definitely because i'm
black
yes and it's the same you know can
women have misogynistic views you know
can women perpetrate the ideals of
patriarchy
can women have views
that are destructive to other women yes
and it's the same when it comes to
racism
as well when you live in a society that
constantly tells you
you're less than when it constantly
views and locates
black people as dangerous as
unattractive
as something to be aware of as um
a problem that needs to be fixed if
you're a black person and you're looking
at these images and these
narratives over and over and over again
just imagine the sense of impact that it
might have on your own sense of worth
and racial dignity so i believe that
when black people and people of color
gas light it is they're just
you know parroting and they're just
perpetuating
the same tools of white supremacy
that they've learned to to adopt and to
internalize
so everybody is affected by this ocean
that we are swimming in
and black people and people of color are
not insulated or isolated from it
they are just they can be victims of it
just as much as they can be perpetrators
of this
so
[Music]
well for starters um
i'm always going to trust my gut when
i'm being gaslit
i'm not going to be apologetic
for that or for speaking up about it and
no one should either
and if me speaking up or anyone else
speaking up
makes other people feel comfortable then
that's not my problem
if you do something wrong and you cross
the line you need to know
and i shouldn't be the only one having
to tell you
everyone else should call you out for
your behavior
look i think that's the purpose of
gaslighting is to make you
question your experience is to make you
think you're overreacting
and oversensitive and question your
judgment when you start to feel
like you're double guessing your
experience you just know
yep that experience has produced exactly
the same results that it was hoping to
to have so to answer this i want to
quote
um an incredible woman jacqueline yama
who
um wrote um a viral instagram post
on this topic and she advises black
indigenous and people of color
to follow these three key things which
i'll also share with you today
one is don't let anyone tell you how to
feel about something that they've never
had
the experience of in their body
your lived experience is your expertise
so don't let anybody explain away
your experience when you know it to be
true
number two don't exhaust yourself
arguing with someone who is more
concerned about not being called a
racist
rather than doing the work of
being anti-racist if they're more
concerned about their feelings
of goodness and their you know centering
themselves as being good people rather
than
looking inward um
and looking at how their intentions
might have caused
unintended consequences then it's not
really
you know done don't exhaust yourself you
know
centering those feelings instead go
inside and look at your
own experience and again stay grounded
on your own racial dignity
number three don't spend time trying to
prove why something is racist
you know a lot of people are just so
over committed
to misunderstanding you it is not your
job to be an unpaid anti-racist
educator okay your experience is your
expertise divest from
having to be every person's educator
about your experience and the fourth
thing that i would like to add to this
is don't re-traumatize yourself
by having to recount your own traumatic
experience of racism
so that people can believe you alright
not everybody has earned the right to
hear your story
another form of protecting your racial
dignity
is to know who and why to share your
story
and if it's not safe if you feel you're
not going to be believed
just go to communities and places where
you know your experience is going to be
affirmed
and validated
of course that's why we are talking
about these conversations because
their impact is manifold their impact
is long term and damaging
the processes of racialization which
produce
microaggressions and racial gas lighting
have significant impacts on people's
psychological safety you know so black
people and people of color
just do not enjoy the protection of
living in a social environment that
cushions them
from the stresses and the micro injuries
of racialization the burden of not being
believed
tiptoeing around your experiences so you
don't upset
others sitting with an experience
you know by yourself because you know
that other people
are just not going to get it catering to
white feelings so that you're not
accused of being an aggressor
is really difficult it is difficult when
your most
important lived experience is not
believed
and this is what culminates in what
william smith refers to as
racial battle fatigue racial battle
fatigue
makes visible the burden of bearing a
body
that is constantly assaulted by racism
and it highlights the profound
psychological and physiological and
emotional burden
of living in a body that is constantly
assaulted by these experiences
so this battle of course has significant
health
outcomes for black people you know and
some of these outcomes include
chronic diseases dying young indigestion
and gastric distress
apathy irritability a profound sense of
helplessness
powerlessness and hopelessness mood
dysregulation
issues such as rage and anger you know
into generation of trauma that lead to
all these things such as substance abuse
and
you know a sense of you know chronic
powerlessness
you know poor school or job performance
all these things
culminates when you're living in an
environment
that is not safe you know
and this is what i say
that racial battle fatigue has
not only immediate impacts but long-term
impacts that can lead to
intergenerational trauma to people who
are not into our children who are not
even here yet
so the impact of racial gaslighting of
course has severe mental health
implications
you know um some of these
implications in the here and now can
look like just feeling isolated feeling
the same franchise feeling disconnected
from
people your community it might also lead
to
internalized racism which is
um you know just that sense of starting
to believe the narrative
you know if you're constantly
misbelieved if you're constantly
misunderstood if you're constantly told
you are the problem maybe
you might start believing that wow maybe
i'm the issue maybe i am the problem and
of course this has
such significant impact on black
people's sense of worth
sense of self-esteem sense of confidence
which generates a lot of sadness and
fear and guilt
and anger you know you know coming to
that
sense of maybe it's my fault
maybe i caused this maybe i'm too
sensitive maybe i'm overreacting
leads to a sense of internalization
which then
you know leads to a lot of
self-destructive
um impacts on your sense of racial
dignity
so i would kill racial gaslighting by
building a damn time machine
going back a couple hundred years you
know
stopping white people from colonizing
black and brown
people and their lands give them
something better to do i don't know give
them a rubik's cube or something
something
and then come back
[Music]
educating everyone whether you're white
black a person of color on what racial
gaslighting is and how you can partake
in racial gaslighting without even
knowing it
educating people on the history
of racism period because
people just don't know they might
understand racism but they don't know
where it stems from
and education is the key to solving so
many of these issues
[Music]
how would i kill racial gaslighting um
one i would say don't be defensive
listen
listen to what other people are telling
you showing you
don't aim to be i'm not a racist
aim to be anti-racist you know not being
racist
is not enough you know how can we be in
a world where everybody
claims not to be a racist yet we are
filled with
experiences of people dying
you know because of racism and every
almost every person of color has a
situation and an experience
where they have been a victim so i don't
get that like called for me in that
paradox
number two you know just realize that
your intentions
have consequences and on that just
because you didn't
intend to hurt someone doesn't mean that
they were not hurt
um number three i would say two things
can be true
at the same time you can be a good
person and you can still perpetuate
stereotypes that hurt black indigenous
in people
of color the the intention
is to learn not to sink in shame or
guilt
um another thing that i would say is
don't rely on black people or people of
color to teach you about racism that's a
burden that shouldn't be carried by
anybody who has to live through these
experiences
it's also a form of white centering
i the other point is accountability
feels like an attack when you're not
ready to acknowledge how your behavior
harms others so if you're told that
you've done something and you're not
and you find yourself feeling really
defensive and it feels like an attack
just sit down and ask why am i feeling
this mean why am i reacting this way
the other thing that i would like to say
is people
gaslight others when they have their own
realities
denied by others so don't discharge your
pain
by gaslighting others address it maybe
go to therapy
and finally i would say the inner voice
that says that you're better than others
is just
as disempowering as the inner voice that
says that you're lesser than
others the goal is ubuntu
i am because you are and because you are
we are we humanize ourselves by
humanizing others
and that's the essence of being human
[Music]
call me an eater call me a nominee
[Music]
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[Music]
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