Our primordial drive for sex and love | Helen Fisher

Summary

Anthropologist Helen Fisher explores the biological underpinnings of love and marriage, challenging the 'tabula rasa' view of human behavior. She identifies three distinct brain systems for sex drive, romantic love, and attachment, each with evolutionary purposes. Fisher's research, including brain scans of those in love and those rejected, reveals that romantic love is akin to an addiction, with significant implications for understanding and respecting the intense emotions involved in love and relationships.

Takeaways

• 🧠 The mind is not a 'tabula rasa' but has inherent biological influences, particularly in love and marriage patterns.
• 💡 Helen Fisher, an anthropologist, argues that love and marriage behaviors have biological origins, contrary to the academic view of her graduate school days.
• ❤️ Romantic love, sex drive, and attachment are not just phases but are distinct brain systems with evolutionary purposes.
• 🔍 Fisher's research involved using brain scanners to identify the neural pathways associated with romantic love, revealing activity in the ventral tegmental area (VTA) which is linked to dopamine production.
• 💔 Rejection in love activates the same brain regions associated with addiction and pain, suggesting that the intense feelings of love persist even after a breakup.
• 🧬 Fisher's work challenges the notion that romantic love is supernatural, highlighting its universality and biological basis.
• 👥 Long-term love involves activity in the VTA, hypothalamus, and regions linked to calm and security, indicating a mix of romantic love and attachment.
• 🤔 Fisher ponders the biological reasons behind why individuals are naturally drawn to specific partners, suggesting it's more than just cultural factors.
• 🌟 To sustain a long-term, happy partnership, it's important to maintain all three brain systems: sex drive, romantic love, and attachment.
• 🚀 Novel experiences can help sustain feelings of romantic love, while physical touch and closeness can strengthen feelings of attachment.
• 🌱 Fisher's ultimate goal is to use her understanding of these brain circuits to help people find the right partner and sustain a long-term, happy relationship.

Q & A

What was the initial belief about the mind in graduate school as mentioned by Helen Fisher?

The initial belief about the mind in graduate school was that it was an empty slate, a 'tabula rasa,' filled by the environment to shape who you are.

What does Helen Fisher believe has a biological origin in human behavior?

Helen Fisher believes that patterns of love and marriage have a biological origin, as they are crucial for the continuation of the species.

What are the three different brain systems Helen Fisher identifies in her first academic paper?

The three brain systems Helen Fisher identifies are sex drive, feelings of intense romantic love, and feelings of deep attachment.

What role does the ventral tegmental area (VTA) play in romantic love according to the script?

The ventral tegmental area (VTA) is responsible for producing dopamine, which gives individuals the focus, motivation, craving, and elation associated with intense romantic love.

What was the criticism Helen Fisher received from a peer reviewer regarding her study on love?

One of the peer reviewers criticized her study by suggesting that romantic love is part of the supernatural and therefore not a suitable subject for scientific study.

How did Helen Fisher respond to the criticism that romantic love is part of the supernatural?

Helen Fisher questioned why the same logic wouldn't apply to other basic emotions like anger, fear, disgust, or joy, and argued that romantic love is a universal and powerful brain system.

What did Helen Fisher discover when she scanned the brains of people who had been rejected in love?

She discovered activity in the ventral tegmental area (VTA), a region linked with pain, and three brain regions associated with craving and addiction, indicating that romantic love can be an addiction.

What is the significance of the nucleus accumbens in the context of the study?

The nucleus accumbens is significant because it becomes active during addiction to substances like cocaine, heroin, alcohol, cigarettes, and gambling, and it was found to be active in the context of rejected love.

What advice does Helen Fisher give for maintaining a long-term, happy partnership?

To maintain a long-term, happy partnership, Helen Fisher advises sustaining all three brain systems: having regular sex to drive up testosterone, introducing novelty to maintain romantic love, and continuing pleasant touch to increase oxytocin levels for deep attachment.

What does Helen Fisher believe about the future of romantic love?

Helen Fisher believes that romantic love is primordial, adaptable, and eternal, and it will survive as long as humans do as a species.