What the Church Won’t Tell You about M*sturbation…

Summary

This video script addresses the sensitive topic of masturbation from a Christian perspective, emphasizing its conflict with God's design for sexuality within marriage. The speaker discusses the importance of understanding the heart's intent and the potential for guilt and shame associated with the act. Drawing from 'Sexual Detox' by Tim Challis, the script explores the psychological reasons behind the act and its impact on future relationships. It concludes with practical steps for overcoming this struggle through Christ, seeking accountability, and using tools like Covenant Eyes for internet monitoring.

Takeaways

• 🚨 The video discusses sensitive topics like sexuality, physical intimacy, and pornography, and advises viewers to pause if uncomfortable.
• 🌟 The speaker is supported by Patreon, allowing for open discussions without fear of video suppression on platforms like YouTube.
• 📚 A book recommendation is made: 'Sexual Detox' by Tim Challis, for those seeking deeper understanding on the issue of masturbation.
• 💔 Jesus' teachings emphasize the importance of heart intent over physical acts, as lustful thoughts are equated to adultery in spirit.
• 🧐 The script encourages introspection to understand the root causes of the urge to masturbate, such as loneliness, hopelessness, or anxiety.
• 🛑 It argues that masturbation is contrary to God's design for sexuality, which is meant to be shared within the covenant of marriage.
• 🤔 The video highlights the potential for masturbation to create unrealistic expectations for future sexual relationships.
• 🌱 God's design for sexuality is described as fruitful, bonding individuals relationally and leading to pleasure and reproduction.
• 🙏 Overcoming the cycle of masturbation is possible through Christ, with the recognition of forgiveness and righteousness in Jesus.
• 📲 Practical steps are suggested, such as reaching out to a trusted individual for accountability and using tools like Covenant Eyes to monitor internet usage.
• 🔗 The importance of community and support is emphasized for those struggling with the issue, encouraging viewers to seek help and not face it alone.

Q & A

What is the main topic discussed in the video?

The main topic discussed in the video is the issue of masturbation, its relation to spirituality, and its impact on one's life from a Christian perspective.

What is the purpose of the 'Sexual Detox' book mentioned in the video?

The 'Sexual Detox' book by Tim Challis is recommended as a resource to delve deeper into the issue of lust and masturbation, offering insights and guidance on overcoming these issues.

How does the video relate Jesus' teachings to the issue of lust and masturbation?

The video references Jesus' teachings in Matthew 5, where he speaks about the heart's intent and desire, not just the physical act, to highlight that lustful thoughts are considered as sinful as the act itself.

What is the significance of the 'one flesh' concept in the context of the video?

The 'one flesh' concept signifies God's design for sexual expression to occur within the covenantal bond of marriage, emphasizing the self-giving aspect of sexuality that is contrary to the self-pleasure of masturbation.

Why does the video suggest that masturbation can lead to unrealistic expectations in future relationships?

The video suggests that masturbation, often accompanied by fantasies, can create unrealistic expectations for future sexual relationships, potentially leading to dissatisfaction and misunderstanding of God's design for sex within marriage.

What are some of the negative emotional effects of masturbation discussed in the video?

The video discusses feelings of guilt, shame, sadness, and isolation as potential negative emotional effects of masturbation, especially for Christians who feel convicted by the Holy Spirit.

How does the video propose to overcome the cycle of masturbation?

The video suggests overcoming the cycle of masturbation through Christ, understanding the gospel, seeking forgiveness, and recognizing that one's shame has been washed away through faith in Jesus.

What practical steps does the video recommend for someone struggling with masturbation?

The video recommends two practical steps: 1) Reach out to a trusted individual for accountability and support, and 2) Sign up for Covenant Eyes, an internet accountability service, to help break free from the cycle of pornography that often fuels masturbation.

What role does the Holy Spirit play in the context of the video's discussion on masturbation?

The Holy Spirit is portrayed as a convicting force, leading individuals to recognize that masturbation is contrary to God's design and prompting feelings of guilt and the need for repentance.

How does the video address the issue of pornography in relation to masturbation?

The video acknowledges that masturbation is often fueled by pornography and suggests using Covenant Eyes to create an accountability structure that can help individuals resist the temptation of pornography.

Outlines

00:00

🚨 Addressing the Unspoken: Sexuality and Masturbation 🚨

The speaker begins by warning viewers about the sensitive nature of the topic, which includes discussions on sexuality, physical intimacy, and pornography. They express gratitude for the support of their Patreon community, which allows them to tackle such challenging subjects without fear of video suppression on YouTube. The main focus is on the Christian perspective on masturbation, referencing Jesus' teachings from Matthew 5 about lust and the heart's intentions. The speaker recommends 'Sexual Detox' by Tim Challies for further exploration and emphasizes the importance of understanding God's design for sexual expression within marriage, as opposed to the self-pleasure and isolation associated with masturbation.

05:01

🌱 God's Design for Sexuality: Fruitfulness and Selflessness 🌱

In the second paragraph, the speaker delves deeper into God's intended design for sexuality, highlighting its purpose to be fruitful relationally, sexually, and physically. They discuss the relational bond and pleasure that comes from sexual intimacy within marriage, as well as the physical aspect of reproduction. The paragraph contrasts this with the act of masturbation, which is described as unfruitful, isolating, and contrary to God's design. The speaker also touches on the feelings of guilt and shame that can accompany masturbation, especially for Christians, and the importance of overcoming these struggles through Christ, not by willpower alone.

10:02

🛡 Overcoming the Cycle: Accountability and Spiritual Growth 🛡

The final paragraph offers practical advice for those struggling with masturbation. The speaker encourages viewers to reach out to a trusted individual in their life for accountability and to share their struggles openly. They also recommend signing up for Covenant Eyes, a service that provides internet accountability by sharing browsing history with a designated person. The speaker emphasizes the importance of overcoming the cycle of masturbation through Christ's power and the support of the community, concluding with an invitation to subscribe and follow on other platforms for more content.

Keywords

💡Sin

In the context of the video, 'sin' refers to actions or behaviors that go against the moral and ethical standards as defined by the speaker's religious beliefs. The video discusses masturbation as a sin, which is an act that the speaker believes is contrary to God's design for sexuality. The term is used to highlight the moral dilemma faced by individuals who struggle with this behavior.

💡Sexuality

Sexuality in the video is discussed as a complex aspect of human identity that involves emotional, physical, and social components. The speaker addresses the topic of sexuality in relation to physical intimacy and pornography, emphasizing the importance of understanding and addressing it within a moral framework.

💡Pornography

Pornography is mentioned as a harmful influence that can distort one's perception of sexuality and intimacy. The speaker warns of its potential to create unrealistic expectations and to contribute to feelings of guilt and shame, particularly within the context of Christian beliefs.

💡Masturbation

Masturbation is a central theme in the video, where it is presented as an act that is considered sinful by the speaker's religious standards. The speaker discusses it as an act done for self-pleasure, which is seen as contrary to the self-giving sexuality that God calls for in marriage.

💡Heart Intent

The concept of 'heart intent' is introduced when discussing Jesus' words in Matthew 5, emphasizing the importance of one's inner desires and motivations rather than just the physical act. It is used to argue that the desire for lustful thoughts is as significant as the act itself in the context of sin.

💡Sexual Detox

Sexual Detox is a book by Tim Challis recommended in the video for those seeking to understand and overcome issues related to lust and sexual immorality. The term is used to suggest a process of purifying one's thoughts and behaviors related to sexuality.

💡Covenantal Relationship

A 'covenantal relationship' is a term used to describe the sacred bond between a husband and wife as intended by God, where sexual expression is meant to take place. The video contrasts this with the act of masturbation, which is seen as an isolated and self-centered act.

💡Fruitful

In the context of the video, 'fruitful' is used to describe the intended outcomes of God's design for sexuality, which includes relational, sexual, and physical fruitfulness. The speaker argues that masturbation is not fruitful in any of these aspects, as it does not contribute to a healthy relationship or physical reproduction.

💡Guilt and Shame

Guilt and shame are emotions that the speaker associates with the act of masturbation, particularly from a Christian perspective. These feelings arise from the belief that such acts go against God's design and can lead to a sense of moral failure.

💡Gospel

The 'gospel' is presented as the good news of Jesus overcoming sin and providing forgiveness through faith in Him. The speaker encourages viewers to understand the gospel as a source of hope and strength to overcome the cycle of masturbation and associated guilt.

💡Accountability

Accountability is a key concept in the video, where the speaker suggests practical steps for overcoming the habit of masturbation, such as sharing one's struggles with a trusted individual and using tools like Covenant Eyes to monitor internet history. This concept is integral to the speaker's message of overcoming sin through transparency and support.

Highlights

The video addresses the sensitive topic of masturbation from a Christian perspective, emphasizing the importance of discussing it openly.

The speaker acknowledges the support from Patreon, which allows for honest discussions without fear of video suppression on YouTube.

The video references Jesus' teachings in Matthew 5, highlighting the importance of heart intent over physical acts.

Sexual Detox by Tim Challis is recommended for those seeking deeper understanding of the issue.

The absence of direct biblical references to masturbation is compared to the indirect teachings on abortion, suggesting a broader application of biblical principles.

Masturbation is considered contrary to God's design for sexuality within the covenant of marriage.

The video encourages introspection on why individuals may be drawn to masturbation, citing potential reasons such as loneliness, hopelessness, or anxiety.

Guilt and shame associated with masturbation are discussed as a result of the Holy Spirit's conviction.

The damaging effects of masturbation on future relationships and unrealistic expectations are explored.

The video explains how God designed sexuality to be fruitful relationally, sexually, and physically within marriage.

Masturbation is contrasted with the biblical design of sex, highlighting its lack of fruitfulness.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of overcoming masturbation through Christ, not just by willpower or pragmatic beliefs.

The gospel is presented as the key to overcoming sin, including masturbation, by understanding God's forgiveness and the power of Jesus.

Practical steps are suggested, such as finding an accountable person to share struggles with and seeking their support.

Covenant Eyes is recommended as a tool for internet accountability to help break free from the cycle of pornography and masturbation.

The video concludes with a call to action for viewers to take steps towards overcoming masturbation and finding support in their faith community.

Transcripts

this is the sin that nobody wants to

talk about you won't hear about it in

church but it's so important that we

address it just a fair warning in this

video we're going to be talking about

sexuality physical intimacy pornography

if that's going to be a problem for you

put this video on hold and come back to

it later when you're ready one of the

reasons we can have such honest and

Frank conversations on this channel here

one of the reasons that I don't shy away

from these tough topics is because I

have the base of people that support me

on patreon so I don't have to worry too

much about this video getting suppressed

on YouTube we're not getting passed

around as much or monetization being

suppressed because I have you guys on

there that support me if you want to get

behind what I'm doing and create a

sustainable Ministry where I can

continue to make this content head on

over to patreon you can get access to

all sorts of rewards and we do video

streams bi-weekly we also have exclusive

videos on there in our Discord so if

that interests you check it out it will

be a huge blessing now without further

Ado let's dive in so some people say

that masturbation is just Norm normal

and it's natural you'll even hear this

from people that call themselves

Christians as well they say Jesus didn't

really say anything about masturbation

so we're good but I want to hone in on

something that Jesus said in Matthew 5.

when he talks about if you look at a

woman to lust after her you've already

committed adultery with her in your

heart we need to understand there that

Jesus is honing Into the Heart intent

the heart desire and not just the

physical act one of the resources that I

utilized for this video is a book by Tim

Challis called sexual detox I want to

recommend it for you guys because it is

very very beneficial if you want to go

deeper in on this issue one of the

things he points out in the book is just

as abortion specifically isn't mentioned

in the bible we have many verses about

the value of human life of the Dignity

of being knitted together in our

mother's womb and how we are fearfully

and wonderfully made and how that has

direct application to the issue of

abortion today similarly when we look at

this issue of lust and and from our

hearts and this desire the sexual

immorality we can apply this to directly

to masturbation as well something where

we're looking and we're trying to gain

sexual gratification instant

gratification outside of the context of

marriage of that covenantal relationship

and so we can see okay that's not part

of God's design in Genesis we learn

about the first man Adam and how God

said hey it's not good that man should

be alone and he created a help meet for

him in Eve and that the The man shall

leave his father and his mother and

become one flesh with his wife that was

God's design from the beginning that is

the outflowing of aware sexual

expression should take place in that

covenantal Bond and so if we're looking

at masturbation we're seeing okay this

is an isolated act done for

self-pleasure it is a selfish act it is

contrary to kind of the self-giving

sexuality that God calls us to in

marriage I know I can say all this to

you and you're saying okay I get it

Isaac it's not good that I'm doing this

um but I think it's also important that

we understand okay why are we so drawn

to masturbation for you ask yourself

some introspective questions like why is

your heart so drawn to it why do you

want to go to this place again and again

is it loneliness do you feel this deep

sense of lack of connection in your life

maybe it's a sense of hopelessness I'll

never find a partner I'll never get

married and so this is kind of the only

sexual relief that I'll ever get and so

there's there's this lack of Hope there

maybe it's anxiety where you're like I

just my life isn't going well I'm just

anxious about all these different things

I have this kind of sense of I need to

get control but I don't have control

because my life is out of control in a

lot of ways and this is a sense of of

peace and relief that I can find that is

that I can be in control of now when you

masturbate there's going to be a deep

sense of guilt or shame at least as a

Christian because our conscience we're

being convicted by the Holy Spirit

saying hey this isn't what's best for

you this isn't what God wants for you

this is this kind of counter to God's

design it isn't just kind of counter to

God's design it is counter to God's

design and so you're being convicted in

this way but it's important to know that

it's not just about the act itself

that's the sin there's a deeper issue

going on and that's why I want you to be

a little bit introspective here about

what are these kind of core beliefs or

core fears or core anxieties or core

desires that are leading you continually

to to keep on this cycle one of the

really damaging aspects of masturbation

that I hadn't thought about too much

until reading that book by Tim Charlie's

was that it creates kind of a

unrealistic expectations for your future

partner so when you're having these

fantasies in the midst of masturbation

you're having these sexual fantasies

you're creating these expectations of

what you want your future sex life to be

like and and that's just ridiculous

that's just that that can't happen and

you also are training yourself to only

be able to gain sexual satisfaction

based on those fantasies similarly to

pornography when you're fueling yourself

with more and more intense and extreme

scenarios you're putting that

expectation on your future partner in

order for you to feel that sexual

fulfillment which is obviously just

messed up now back to the topic at hand

when God designed sexuality he designed

it to be a fruitful Endeavor when we

talk about fruitful we talk about

fruitful relationally sexually and

physically like in reproduction so

relationally fruitful in that it bonds

two to become one that they are united

that that relationship is bolstered by

that kind of intimacy then when we talk

about sexually fruitful it is

pleasureful that's part of God's design

it's not just kind of mechanical this is

only for having children no the pleasure

aspect is a big part in it and that's

where the self-less component becomes

really prominent because you're not

going into this relationship this

physical Intimacy in order to merely get

but rather to give you're looking to

selflessly fulfill their desires above

your own then physically fruitful your

reproduction you're having children

obviously not every couple is able to

have children but this is kind of a core

element to how God designs sex in

marriage when we talk about masturbation

then is that fruitful relationally no

not at all it's an isolated it act done

with your own fantasies or maybe you're

watching pornography you're bonding to

your screen you're bonding to your

fantasies you're bonding to yourself and

your own desires is it fruitful sexually

well some might see it that way it's

instant gratification you can get off

when you want to but truly if it's not

the way that God designed it it's just

such a small taste of what God had

actually invited us into in proper

context like if sex is inside of

marriage how beautiful and how

life-giving that is as opposed to the

shame and the guilt that comes after

after masturbating it feels good for a

moment but ultimately leads you to guilt

into shame and it definitely doesn't

lead to being fruitful physically if

anything it actually inhibits your

motivation as a man specifically to

pursue the calling that God has on your

life to take responsibility to

ultimately find a woman and to marry her

and to have kids and provide for them

like you're being pacified by

masturbation to this low level of

achievement and and into thinking that

that's okay and that's good so it's not

fruitful at all in that context and you

stay isolated now I want to be honest

with you here if you've been caught in a

cycle of masturbation and you've

experienced guilt or shame or sadness or

isolation I want you to know that this

isn't something that you can't overcome

through Christ notice I put the through

Christ there because if you're doing

this on your own if you're just trying

to overcome this by willpower or just

pragmatic beliefs that my life will

become just better if I stop doing this

so I should just stop it won't work it

won't be enough ultimately what we need

to do is understand the gospel what is

the gospel the gospel is the fact and

the the reality that God through Jesus

has overcome sin that the power of sin

in our life that we have been forgiven

when we put our faith in Jesus that we

have been our shame has been washed away

that we are no longer guilty before him

and that rather now as Christians as

those who have repented for our sin we

can turn to Christ boldly asking for

forgiveness confessing our sins but

recognizing that we are clothed in Jesus

righteousness and that nothing could

separate us from the love of God as his

children the evil one wants to use

masturbation in your life for you to

question your salvation to get you off

of the battlefield this was the game

changer for me realizing that God's

power and presence is with me all the

time as his child I have his power and

his presence with me so that means even

in those moments of isolation God is

present he is not distant and he wants

to meet us even in the midst of our pain

or anxiety or our loneliness he wants to

meet us there and also after you sin he

wants to meet us in the midst of our

shame and our guilt to provide

forgiveness and and lift us off of the

ground to point us ultimately to the

Forgiveness that he has enabled and also

just walking with him in the spirit that

we would not gratify the desires of the

flesh two practical steps before we go

today and I want you to follow through

on these the first one is go through

your phone contact tax who is it in your

life that you trust that you can share

this with I want you to send them a text

now to say hey I've been struggling with

this maybe even a phone call but I know

that can be a lot for somebody so even

just begin with a text say hey I've been

struggling with this it's a problem in

my life I need to be honest and open

about this to get it out of just my

isolated State and can you keep me

accountable on this can you ask me about

this is it okay if I phone you or text

you when I'm tempted is that all right

and maybe they say no but most likely if

it's somebody you trust in your life

there's been some sort of a spiritual

Mentor or just an encouragement in your

life they're going to be more than

willing to say hey yeah of course thank

you for being honest and open and

vulnerable enough with me to share this

and just do it today do not delay on

this it is going to be the most

important step to getting you to helping

you break free from this the second

thing is that masturbation is often

fueled by pornography and so we want to

put up some accountability in order to

make that step a lot lot more

challenging what I want you to do is

click the link in my description and

sign up for Covenant eyes it will send a

report of your internet history to

somebody in your life that can keep you

accountable I've heard it's been a

tremendous help to many men and women

that have helped them break free from

pornography so click the link in my

description and sign up for that as well

thanks so much for watching this video

guys if you enjoyed it subscribe because

I'm putting out new videos every single

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platforms as well like Instagram and

Tick Tock at it's Isaac David until next

time I will see you later God bless