The Most Important Thing Cannot be Said: Eddie Calasanz at TEDxADMU

Summary

In this inspiring talk, the speaker addresses the question 'What do I do with my life?' by sharing three stories. The first emphasizes starting small and governing oneself, as advised by Confucius. The second story illustrates the importance of dreaming big while starting small, as told by a wise man observing stone workers with different visions. The third story, from Mencius, warns against impatience in growth. The speaker concludes with a Spanish mystic's reflection on love being the ultimate judge of our lives, urging us to start with small actions towards grand visions and to be patient with the pace of growth.

Takeaways

• 🤔 Start with self: The speaker suggests starting with oneself to make an impact, drawing a parallel to Confucius' philosophy about governing a nation starting with oneself.
• 🌟 Dream big: Despite starting small, it's crucial to have a grand vision and to dream big, as illustrated by the story of the three stonecutters with different perspectives on their work.
• 🕰️ Patience is key: The story of the farmer and the rice seedlings emphasizes the importance of patience in growth and development, cautioning against rushing the process.
• 🏗️ Building takes time: The speaker stresses that significant endeavors such as nation-building and community creation are long-term processes that require a lifetime commitment.
• 🌱 The unseen is vital: Changu's wheel maker story highlights that the most important aspects of life and work often cannot be expressed in words and are learned through experience.
• 📚 Learning from history: The emperor's reading of historical deeds points to the value of learning from the past, but also acknowledges that the most significant lessons are often unspoken.
• 💡 The power of small actions: The speaker encourages the audience to recognize that even small, everyday actions can contribute to something larger and lasting over time.
• 🌐 The impact of community: The talk touches on the collective impact of individual efforts and how they can contribute to the bigger picture of society.
• 👥 The importance of relationships: The final story about being judged on love underscores the significance of how we interact with and care for others throughout our lives.
• 🔍 Reflect on your legacy: The speaker invites the audience to consider their legacy and the impact they will have, suggesting that love and contribution are the most enduring aspects of our lives.

Q & A

Question 1: What prompted the speaker to give this talk?

The speaker was asked by a former student's father, Jav Alp Pasa, to share a few ideas. The speaker agreed and decided to reflect on an experience he had with a student who asked for life advice.

Question 2: What was the central question posed by a student that inspired the speaker's message?

The student asked, 'Sir, what do I do with my life?' This question led the speaker to contemplate and share broader insights about personal growth and life purpose.

Question 3: What lesson does the speaker convey from the Chinese philosopher Confucius?

Confucius' lesson is that to govern a nation, one must first learn to govern oneself. Personal self-management and character development are the foundation for larger responsibilities, like governing a family, friends, or a nation.

Question 4: How does the speaker connect Socrates’ philosophy to Confucius’ teachings?

The speaker mentions that, similar to Confucius, Socrates emphasized the importance of 'caring for the soul.' Both philosophers highlight the need for self-care and personal development before contributing to others or society.

Question 5: What is the significance of 'starting small' according to the speaker?

The speaker stresses that it’s important to start with small, everyday actions, even though they may seem insignificant, as these small efforts are the foundation for larger contributions over time.

Question 6: What lesson is conveyed in the story of the three stonecutters?

The story illustrates the importance of perspective and ambition. While all three workers were cutting stones, the one who envisioned 'building a cathedral' showed the importance of dreaming big and seeing one’s work as part of a larger, meaningful vision.

Question 7: What does the farmer's impatience with the growth of rice teach us?

The story warns against impatience in the process of growth. Real, meaningful progress—whether in building a nation, raising a family, or personal development—takes time, and rushing or forcing results can lead to failure.

Question 8: What does the Wheel Maker’s story convey about the limitations of knowledge?

The Wheel Maker’s story highlights that there are things which cannot be fully expressed through words. True mastery and deep knowledge often surpass what can be articulated, and some of the most important insights must be experienced rather than taught.

Question 9: How does the speaker connect personal contributions to larger societal goals?

The speaker encourages starting small but dreaming big, noting that individual contributions—though humble—are essential for the long-term development of society. Personal efforts, when connected to a larger vision, help build something lasting and meaningful.

Question 10: What is the final message of the speaker regarding life’s ultimate judgment?

The speaker concludes with the idea that, in the end, we will be judged on love—how we have given ourselves to others and how we have received others into our lives. This aligns with a quote from the Spanish mystic, Juan de la Cruz.