Awkward Puritan Double Date - Studio C
Summary
TLDRIn a humorous double date scenario, Matt introduces his roommate Jedidiah, who has a starkly old-fashioned and chauvinistic view of women, to two modern women. Jedidiah's comical misunderstandings of contemporary dating norms lead to a series of awkward and antiquated comments, including comparing the women to livestock and his preference for a daughter due to the suffering it will cause him. The group's attempts to engage in typical date activities such as mini-golf and ice cream are met with Jedidiah's bizarre and outdated reactions, highlighting the cultural gap and providing a comedic take on dating across different eras.
Takeaways
- 😅 Matt organizes a double date and introduces his new roommate, Jedidiah, who has a very old-fashioned and peculiar personality.
- 🚗 Jedidiah is late because he encountered 'devil-worshipping motorcyclists' on the freeway, which he and his donkey, Tribulation, dealt with.
- 😳 Jedidiah's views on women are archaic, comparing them to livestock for their physical attributes and suitability for farming and childbearing.
- 😲 The concept of dating is foreign to Jedidiah, who thinks it's a waste of money and not the 'Devil's work'.
- 🌹 Jedidiah's attempt at romance is misguided, suggesting that women prefer practicality over romantic gestures like poetry.
- 🏌️♂️ A mini-golf game is suggested as a date activity, but Jedidiah misunderstands the concept, associating it with physical punishment.
- 🤔 Jedidiah's upbringing is extreme, leaving his parents at 7 months old and being raised with a strict 'no coddling' policy.
- 🧊 Jedidiah finds the concept of ice cream to be an 'abomination' due to its unnatural freezing of cream outside of winter months.
- 🌾 Instead of ice cream, Jedidiah offers oats and twigs with thorns as a treat, reflecting his unconventional tastes.
- 😑 Despite the oddities, the date ends on a somewhat positive note, with one of the characters reflecting that it wasn't their worst date.
Q & A
Who organized the double date?
-Matt organized the double date.
Why is Matt's roommate late?
-Matt's roommate, Jedidiah, was delayed because he encountered devil-worshipping motorcyclists on the freeway.
What does Jedidiah think about modern transportation?
-Jedidiah considers anything faster than a donkey to be the devil's work.
How does Jedidiah react to the concept of dating?
-Jedidiah is unfamiliar with the concept of dating and initially compares it to a livestock auction.
What does Jedidiah believe about raising a girl?
-Jedidiah believes that raising a girl is good for the soul because suffering is good for the soul, and a man raising a girl suffers more.
What does Jedidiah think about romantic gestures?
-Jedidiah doesn't understand or appreciate romantic gestures like poetry, considering them useless compared to practical things like planting wheat.
How old is Jedidiah and when did he leave his parents?
-Jedidiah is 29 years old, having left his parents' estate 29 years ago, which means he left at 7 months old.
What is Jedidiah's view on women's roles?
-Jedidiah's views on women are extremely antiquated; he initially evaluates women based on their physical attributes for farming and childbearing.
What does the group decide to do after realizing Jedidiah's views are not compatible with modern dating?
-The group decides to play mini golf to try and find a common ground and to avoid further conflict arising from Jedidiah's outdated views.
What does Jedidiah think about ice cream?
-Jedidiah considers the unnatural freezing of cream outside the winter months to be an abomination.
How does the date end for the characters?
-The date ends with the realization that Jedidiah's views are too outdated and incompatible with modern society, leading to a decision to simply get ice cream instead.
Outlines
😅 'Double Date Disaster'
The script begins with a group of friends preparing for a double date, but Matt's roommate, Jedidiah, is late. There's a humorous exchange suggesting that Jedidiah might have encountered trouble, but it's revealed he's averse to modern transportation. Jedidiah finally arrives and makes inappropriate comments about the women present, comparing them to livestock for their physical attributes suitable for farm work. He is corrected and introduced to the concept of dating as a social activity rather than a marriage auction. Despite his outdated views, he shows a preference for daughters over sons, believing suffering is good for the soul.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Double Date
💡Roommate
💡Tribulation
💡Devil's Work
💡Motorcyclists
💡Bride
💡Formalities
💡Livestock
💡Date (as in a social activity)
💡Romance
💡Mini Golf
💡Ice Cream
💡Oats and Twigs
Highlights
MATT organizes a double date and is excited to introduce his new roommate.
MATT's roommate is expected to arrive three hours prior but is delayed, causing concern.
MATT's roommate, JEDIDIAH, believes any vehicle faster than a donkey is the devil's work.
JEDIDIAH's donkey, Tribulation, is used as a mode of transport and has a humorous interaction.
JEDIDIAH had an encounter with 'devil-worshipping' motorcyclists on the freeway.
JEDIDIAH's response to the motorcyclists involved his donkey kicking them back to 'the fiery inferno'.
JEDIDIAH's introduction is met with surprise as he immediately asks which person will be his bride.
JEDIDIAH evaluates the women based on their physical attributes for farm work and childbearing.
The concept of a 'date' is explained to JEDIDIAH as an opportunity to get to know someone better.
JEDIDIAH's views on women and romance are criticized as archaic and offensive.
JEDIDIAH's poetry is a humorous take on traditional love poems, focusing on practicality over romance.
JEDIDIAH's views on women are called 'antediluvian', highlighting the cultural gap.
JEDIDIAH expresses a preference for a daughter, believing suffering is good for the soul.
A suggestion to play mini golf is made as a way to bond and have fun.
JEDIDIAH misunderstands the concept of mini golf, thinking it's a form of punishment.
JEDIDIAH's age is revealed to be 29, having left his parents' estate at 7 months old.
JEDIDIAH's upbringing is described as harsh, with no coddling from his parents.
The date ends with a suggestion to get ice cream, which JEDIDIAH also finds objectionable.
JEDIDIAH brings oats and twigs as an alternative to ice cream, showing his strict lifestyle.
The date is reflected upon as not the worst one had, indicating a sense of humor and resilience.
Transcripts
>>HEY, THANKS FOR PUTTING THIS
DOUBLE DATE TOGETHER MATT.
I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET YOUR NEW ROOMMATE.
>>YEAH, DON'T MENTION IT.
>>YEAH, ACTUALLY, WHERE IS HE?
I THOUGHT YOU SAID HE LEFT THREE HOURS BEFORE
YOU DID TO GET HERE.
>>OH NO!
DO YOU THINK HE HAD CAR TROUBLE?
>>I SERIOUSLY DOUBT THAT.
>>HOW COME?
>>OH, WELL.
>>BECAUSE ANYTHING FASTER THAN A DONKEY IS
CLEARLY THE DEVIL'S WORK.
TRIBULATION, YOU KNOW THE WAY HOME.
[DONKEY SOUND] >>[DONKEY WHINNIE]
>>I APOLOGIZE FOR ALL DELAY, BUT SOME DEVIL WORSHIPPING
MOTORCYCLISTS ATTEMPTED TO PASS US ON THE FREEWAY.
>>OH, DO I DARE ASK WHAT YOU DID TO HIM?
>>I TURNED THE OTHER CHEEK.
>>GOOD FOR YOU.
>>TRIBULATION HOWEVER DONKEY KICKED THEM BACK TO THE FIERY
INFERNO FROM WHICH HE SPRANG.
>>UH, HI.
YOU MUST BE JEDIDIAH.
I'VE-- >>ENOUGH WITH
THE FORMALITIES.
NOW WHICH OF YOU IS TO BE MY BRIDE?
>>OH.
>>AH, THIS ONE COMES FROM GOOD STALK.
HER STRONG LEGS WILL BE MOST USEFUL DURING THE FALL HARVEST.
>>ALL RIGHT, EXCUSE ME?
>>JEDIDIAH, PLEASE.
>>THIS ONE, HOWEVER, HAS PERFECT HIPS
FOR CHILD DELIVERY.
>>OH.
>>PLENTY OF WOMB FOR THE CHILD TO GROW,
BUT NOT ENOUGH TO SPOIL THE CHILD.
>>AH!
JEDIDIAH!
LISTEN TO ME.
THIS IS JUST A DATE NOT A WEDDING AUCTION.
>>WHAT'S A DATE?
>>IT'S WHERE YOU INVITE SOMEONE TO DO AN ACTIVITY SO YOU CAN
GET TO KNOW THEM BETTER.
>>YOU KNOW WHAT THAT SOUNDS LIKE?
IT SOUNDS LIKE-- >>IT'S NOT THE DEVIL'S WORK.
>>I WAS GOING TO SAY IT SOUNDS LIKE A WASTE OF MONEY.
>>IT OFTEN IS.
>>HEY!
>>JEDIDIAH, WOMEN LIKE ROMANCE,
NOT BEING COMPARED TO LIVESTOCK.
>>I SEE.
[CLEARS THROAT] ROSES ARE RED,
VIOLETS ARE BLUE, BOTH ARE USELESS.
PLANT SOME WHEAT!
>>OKAY.
YOU NEED TO WAKE UP AND STEP INTO THE 21ST CENTURY JEDIDIAH.
YOUR VIEWS ON WOMEN ARE EXTREMELY ATEQUATED.
>>YEAH.
LET ME GUESS, YOU'LL ONLY BE HAPPY IF YOUR
FUTURE WIFE BEARS YOU A SON.
>>YEAH.
>>ACTUALLY, I WOULD PREFER A DAUGHTER.
>>REALLY?
>>YES, BECAUSE SUFFERING
IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL.
AND NO ONE SUFFERS MORE THAN A MAN WHO RAISETH A GIRL.
>>OKAY JEDIDIAH.
WHY-- WHY DON'T WE--
WHY DON'T WE PLAY SOME MINI GOLF OKAY?
>>OH YES!
I WOULD BE HAPPY TO BEAT YOU UNTIL YOU ARE CLEANSED.
>>NO-- JEDIDIAH!
>>NOW REMEMBER, A SANCFITIFED PERSON
IS LIKE A SILVER BELL.
THE CLUB IS USED TO HIT THE BALL INTO THE WHOLE.
IT'S A GAME.
>>I HAVEN'T PLAYED A GAME SINCE I LEFT MY PARENT'S
ESTATE 29-YEARS AGO.
>>GROSS.
HOW OLD ARE YOU?
>>29.
I LEFT THEM AT 7-MONTHS.
>>7-MONTHS OLD?
>>DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.
7-MONTHS IN THE WOMB.
MY MOTHER WAS NOT ONE TO CODDLE HER CHILDREN.
>>WHAT?
>>IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING MY BIRTH THE MIDWIFE PROCEEDED
TO SLAP MY BUTTOCKS AND THEN MY FATHER BENT DOWN AND
WHISPERED INTO MY TINY EAR, "YOU CAN CRY NOW,
"AND OPEN UP YOUR LUNGS
OR "YOU CAN HAVE MY RESPECT.
THE CHOICE IS YOURS."
>>CLEARLY THIS WAS A MISTAKE.
LET'S JUST GO GET SOME ICE CREAM.
>>OKAY.
>>THE UNNATURAL FREEZING OF CREAM OUTSIDE THE WINTER
MONTHS IS AN ABOMINATION!
FORTUNATELY, I BROUGHT SOME OATS AND TWIG
THORNS FOR OUR DELIGHT.
>>OH.
>>YEAH, OKAY NO.
>>NO.
YEAH, THAT WASN'T MY WORST DATE.
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