Talk To Strangers. It Will Change Your Life.

Summary

In this video, the host addresses the challenge of talking to strangers and overcoming social anxiety. By sharing personal experiences and practical tips, the host demonstrates how to initiate conversations and build connections. With the help of a friend, they show various approaches to interacting with strangers, from simple questions to more daring requests like asking for a hug or a free item from a restaurant. The video emphasizes the importance of social connections and the need to push past fear of rejection to open new doors in life.

Takeaways

• 😅 Social anxiety is a common barrier that prevents people from talking to strangers and can even affect personal and professional growth.
• 📚 The book 'Quiet' by Susan Cain was instrumental in helping the speaker understand introversion and inspired him to become more extroverted.
• 🌐 The importance of social connections in human life is often overlooked, and the fear of rejection leads to missed opportunities for connection.
• 🚀 Overcoming social anxiety involves stepping out of one's comfort zone, which can lead to personal growth and new experiences.
• 🗣️ Approaching strangers with a friendly and polite demeanor can be an effective way to initiate conversations.
• 🎯 Having a clear goal in mind before starting a conversation with a stranger can help guide the interaction and make it more meaningful.
• 👫 Treating strangers as potential friends can change the perspective on social interactions and reduce the fear of rejection.
• 🌟 Rejection is not personal; it's often a quick judgment based on limited information, and it's important to not take it to heart.
• 📈 Practice makes it easier to talk to strangers; the more one does it, the more comfortable and natural it becomes.
• 🌱 Learning to talk to strangers is about rebuilding essential human traits that have been lost in recent years due to increased reliance on digital connections.

Q & A

What is the main skill discussed in the video script?

The main skill discussed in the video script is learning how to talk to strangers.

Why is talking to strangers considered a difficult thing to do?

Talking to strangers is considered difficult because it requires putting one's ego aside and potentially facing rejection, which can trigger social anxiety.

What book did the English teacher give to the speaker, and why?

The English teacher gave the speaker the book 'Quiet' by Susan Cain because they saw the speaker was struggling and having a hard time, and the book is devoted to helping introverts make real-life changes in the world.

How did the speaker change their approach to social interactions after receiving the book?

After receiving the book 'Quiet', the speaker took it as a challenge to become more extroverted, started talking to more people, and got out of their comfort zone.

What is the fundamental lesson the speaker shares about strangers?

The fundamental lesson shared is that a stranger is just a friend that you haven't met yet.

What is the speaker's advice for starting a conversation with a stranger?

The speaker advises having a goal in mind before entering the conversation, being friendly and polite, and starting with a simple question to ease into the conversation.

What is the importance of being complimentary and nice during a conversation with a stranger?

Being complimentary and nice during a conversation with a stranger can encourage reciprocation of kindness and make the interaction more positive.

How does the speaker demonstrate the process of talking to strangers in the video?

The speaker demonstrates the process by showing different approaches to starting conversations, from simple questions to more challenging social experiments like asking for free items from restaurants.

What is the main message of the video regarding overcoming fear of rejection?

The main message is that rejection is not personal and should not deter one from trying. The speaker emphasizes that the worst that can happen is a negative response, but that should not stop one from attempting to connect with others.

How does the speaker relate talking to strangers to personal growth and success?

The speaker relates talking to strangers to personal growth and success by stating that being able to talk to more people and open up more doors can help achieve one's goals in life, whether it involves social media, personal relationships, or career advancement.

Outlines

00:00

🗣️ Overcoming Social Anxiety to Talk to Strangers

The speaker begins by discussing the importance of learning to talk to strangers, a skill that can be challenging due to the fear of rejection and social anxiety. They share personal experiences of how social anxiety prevented them from approaching people they were interested in or even starting their YouTube channel. The video aims to teach viewers how to overcome this fear and start conversations with strangers. The speaker also humorously demonstrates poor approaches to starting conversations and emphasizes the need to show genuine interest and friendliness when initiating a conversation.

05:02

🌐 Engaging Strangers in Conversations

This section of the script details the process of approaching strangers and starting conversations. The speaker and their friend Joe engage in various interactions, from simple greetings to asking for life advice and even requesting hugs. They explore different scenarios, such as approaching people on the street, in restaurants, and other public places. The goal is to demonstrate that rejection is not personal and that persistence can lead to positive outcomes. The speaker also introduces a social experiment where they ask for free items from various establishments, showcasing the power of simply asking.

10:02

🌱 Rebuilding Human Connection Through Conversations

In the final paragraph, the speaker reflects on the broader implications of talking to strangers. They argue that this skill is about more than just making small talk; it's about reestablishing a sense of human connection that has been lost in the digital age. The speaker shares their personal journey from being introverted to becoming more extroverted and the impact it had on their personal and professional life. They emphasize the importance of self-confidence and the willingness to face rejection as key to achieving one's goals. The video concludes with a reminder that talking to strangers is a valuable skill that can open doors and enrich one's life experiences.

Keywords

💡Social Anxiety

Social anxiety is a mental health condition characterized by an intense fear of social situations, leading to self-consciousness, feelings of being judged, and avoidance of social interactions. In the video, the speaker mentions that social anxiety has prevented him from approaching people he finds interesting or asking out girls he finds cute, illustrating how it can hinder personal growth and social connections.

💡Rejection

Rejection refers to the act of being turned down or dismissed, often leading to feelings of disappointment or hurt. The video emphasizes the fear of rejection as a significant barrier to initiating conversations with strangers. The speaker encourages viewers to move past this fear, suggesting that rejection is not personal and is a part of life that should be embraced to grow.

💡Introvert

An introvert is someone who tends to be more focused on their inner thoughts and feelings rather than seeking external stimulation. In the context of the video, the speaker reflects on being an introvert and how it limited his social interactions. He challenges this by pushing himself to engage more with others, highlighting the importance of stepping out of one's comfort zone.

💡Extrovert

An extrovert is someone who gains energy from interacting with others and tends to be more outgoing. The video discusses the speaker's journey from being an introvert to adopting extroverted behaviors to enhance his social skills. This transformation is portrayed as a way to overcome social anxiety and to make a positive impact in the world.

💡Comfort Zone

A comfort zone is a behavioral state within which a person operates in an environment where they feel at ease and in control. The video encourages viewers to step out of their comfort zones to engage with strangers, suggesting that this is essential for personal growth and overcoming social anxiety.

💡Ego

Ego refers to a person's sense of self-importance or self-esteem. In the video, the speaker mentions the need to 'put your ego in your pocket' when approaching strangers, meaning one should be willing to set aside personal pride and be open to potential rejection or criticism.

💡Connection

Connection refers to the relationship or link between people, often in terms of emotional or social bonding. The video discusses the loss of real-life connections due to increased reliance on online interactions and the importance of talking to strangers to rebuild these human connections.

💡Fear

Fear is an emotional response to a perceived threat or danger. The video addresses the fear of approaching strangers and the fear of rejection as obstacles that must be overcome to improve social skills and interpersonal relationships.

💡Confidence

Confidence is the belief in one's own abilities and the courage to face challenges. The speaker in the video talks about building confidence by approaching strangers, framing it as a skill that can be developed through practice and positive mindset.

💡Rejection

Rejection is the act of refusing to accept, regard favorably, or interact with someone. The video script uses the concept of rejection to highlight the fear that many people have when it comes to initiating conversations with strangers. It suggests that viewing rejection as a normal part of social interaction can help in overcoming this fear.

💡Strangers

Strangers are people one does not know, especially those with whom one has no social or friendly relationship. The video's central theme revolves around the concept of talking to strangers, emphasizing it as a skill that can be learned and practiced to improve social interactions and potentially form new friendships.

Highlights

The importance of learning how to talk to strangers is emphasized as a fundamental life skill.

Overcoming social anxiety and fear of rejection is key to initiating conversations with strangers.

The speaker's personal journey from social anxiety to starting a YouTube channel is shared.

A book recommendation 'Quiet' by Susan Cain influenced the speaker's approach to social interactions.

The concept that strangers are just friends we haven't met yet is introduced.

Having a goal in mind before starting a conversation with a stranger is suggested.

Being polite and friendly when initiating a conversation is highlighted as effective.

The speaker demonstrates how to ask strangers for recommendations in a city.

Rejection is presented as a normal part of social interaction and not a personal attack.

The video includes a social experiment where the speaker and a friend approach strangers for hugs.

A challenge is undertaken to request free items from different businesses by talking to strangers.

The video showcases the success of the social experiment with multiple 'yeses' and one 'no'.

True Earth's eco-friendly laundry strips are introduced as a product to reduce plastic use.

The video concludes with a reflection on the importance of rebuilding human connection in a digital age.

The speaker shares insights on how to approach strangers with confidence, drawing from personal experience.

The video ends with a call to action to not be afraid of rejection and to embrace social interactions.

Transcripts

[Music]

hey how's it going

where are you going

[Music]

learning how to talk to strangers is one

of the most fundamentally important

skills that you can learn in your

lifetime no matter how old or young you

are here's the problem though talking to

strangers fundamentally is a very

difficult thing to do because it

requires you to put your ego in your

pocket and allow yourself to potentially

get rejected social anxiety has

prevented me from asking out a lot of

girls that i thought were cute walking

up to people who seemed interesting and

honestly putting myself out there more

it even took me a long time to start my

youtube channel because i was afraid to

put my face onto this camera and

potentially find out what my friends

really thought of me now i know that a

lot of us have that same problem so in

this video i'm going to be teaching you

how to talk to strangers how to move

past that fear of rejection and learn

how to put yourself out there and open

up every single door before i teach you

how to talk to strangers i think it's

best i show you how not to talk to

strangers ask you a quick question can i

continue the conversation for you with

your friend

just take over the phone

yeah yeah don't say who it is though

sorry

quick question what are you listening to

a podcast oh cool can i listen

cool hi i'm just a random stranger but i

wanted to say hi

oh language spanish spanish

espanol

[Music]

is your name john by chance

[Music]

i thought i recognized you from cesar uh

no i'm sorry

can i get a hug can i have a hug

a hug

yeah why not nice to meet you that's how

not to ask but now let's get into how to

talk to strangers

so this is a video that i've been

wanting to make for a long time because

it's a problem that has been impacting

me since high school i used to be an

extremely introverted person so much so

that in my final year of high school i

won an award and any time that you win

an award you get a trophy but you also

get a book and the book was picked by my

english teacher who saw that i was

struggling and having a really hard time

and the book was called quiet by susan

kane it's a book entirely devoted to how

introverts can still use their powers to

make real-life long-lasting change in

the world what's funny is i had never

considered myself an introvert or an

extrovert i didn't even understand both

of those concepts until she gave me that

book i couldn't believe that that was

the book that she gave me because i

thought introverts are never gonna make

big changes in the world because they're

too afraid to talk to people so i took

her giving me that book as a as a shot

or as a challenge let's say to become

more of an extroverted human being and

at that exact point i flipped the switch

started trying to talk to more people

get out of my comfort zone more and

become more of an extroverted human

being most of us know that a fundamental

part of human life is our social

connections as much as you might not

want to think so or you might be willing

to just sit on instagram and scroll

through social media for the rest of

your life talking to people is a very

important part of life and we all forget

to do it or choose not to do it because

it's scary because we don't want to get

rejected we don't want to get our egos

bruised in a very short amount of time

we have stopped going up to each other

on the streets and instead just resorted

to staring at our phones and i find that

we've lost this certain connection where

it looks like we're more connected

online but at the same time we're

becoming increasingly disconnected in

reality now to help me film this portion

of the video where we're gonna go talk

to strangers this is joe what's up i

made an instagram story asking someone

if they wanted to to help me film he

answered like literally 60 seconds later

actually i saw it at that moment i'm

like what am i doing i'm not training

gotta come help him out wanted to do it

for a while so perfect timing i knew

william from hockey was kind of an

[ __ ] in hockey like he wasn't that

inspirational guy the idea i had of

william was like

an [ __ ] i don't know one day my

friend showed me he's like oh look at

this guy like i'm like oh [ __ ] i know

him he's an [ __ ] he's like no no

look at this bro then i started

listening to his goddamn like

interesting okay whatever i'll give him

follow and it's actually pretty great

content and he's a nice guy i think

we'll find out we'll find out after

today so when it comes to actually

developing the confidence to go and

approach a stranger you really just have

to remember the fundamental lesson which

is a stranger is just a friend that you

haven't yet met now in my experience of

talking to a lot of people and going up

to them on the street and getting over

my own version of social anxiety the

best way to talk to a stranger is to

have a goal in mind before you enter the

conversation once you've gone that it's

really important to just be friendly

when you enter the conversation so one

way that i really like to use which

honestly works all the time is you just

say excuse me sorry to bother you do you

mind if i ask you a quick question very

canadian he's very friendly it's very

polite but it really works once you're

in the conversation you're in like the

hardest part is actually just getting

the conversation started and once you

know that the person is interested in

you and has given you the time to speak

then you just gotta do your thing be

very complimentary people be very nice

and and people will be nice in return so

what we're gonna do right now is i'm

gonna show you a few different ways that

you can actually walk up to strangers

and talk to them i'm just going to give

you the entire rundown from not speaking

to them to getting into a full-blown

conversation so we're just going to

start off with an ask and not a request

this is a really easy way to ease

yourself into a conversation and just

get the adrenaline pumping after maybe

two or three conversations with a

stranger you'll see when you try it

things get a lot easier hi how are you

how's it going

good good

okay all right that wasn't part of it

but excuse me guys i might have to ask

you a quick question okay we're filming

a video we're from out of town but we

want to know what is one thing that we

can do in montreal that's really fun

that you recommend

go for a good routine okay cool all

right thank you excuse me sir how's it

going can i ask you a quick question

we're not from montreal but we're uh

we're trying to figure out cool things

to do so we're asking strangers if they

can recommend anything

there's a good nightlife where are you

from

brazil nice excuse me

sorry

what are you listening to drilled drill

by who what's up dude how are you

good to see you filming a video or

talking to strangers

learning how to talk to children not a

stranger though how's it going man

it's been a while

like i feel like i know everyone who's

walking on the street

every time i see someone in the distance

i'm like i think i know you can ask you

guys a quick question

you mind if i ask you guys a quick

question

no one speaks any language

excuse me guys can i ask you a quick

question

can i ask you a quick question no all

right excuse me do you mind if i ask you

guys a quick question

okay

first rejection first rejection see

what's the worst case that happens like

my feet are still moving their feet are

still moving it's all good the thing

about rejection is that most of us think

it's personal but the reality is it's

not personal no one knows you they don't

know who i am they're just making a

judgment and they're basing it off that

so we can get past that

and we're good all right so part number

two i'm going to take one of my

extroverted friends which is joe joe

supposedly claims that he's not afraid

of anything i am not afraid and we're

going to walk him through how to start

random conversations taking random

characters the hardest part yeah it's

taking you the most busy straight in

montreal excuse me do you mind if i ask

a quick question what's your best piece

of life advice

can i issue a challenge to you yeah go

for it can can i get you to walk up to a

stranger and ask them if you can give

them the hug yeah okay go for it i love

this

hi i'm so sorry

okay better question can i also get a

hug for sure

that's it bro just out of curiosity

why'd you say yes so fast is that your

vlogging i am vlogging yeah why not give

love to people you should always say yes

more often you'll have more stories two

future motivational speakers right here

sir we just want to say you're doing a

great job thank you you're awesome

really very much we needed someone

intelligent part of the organization so

you'd be the only person in my family

yeah that's why i'm here have a good one

that was the gm of the halves that was

can't those can't use it there's a gm of

the house okay last step in the

progression of trying to talk to

strangers is we're gonna go out with a

little bit of an extreme challenge and

walk up to different restaurants and ask

them if we can get a free item hey how

are you

i'm good we're doing a social experiment

for youtube so for the last part of the

video we're going up to different

restaurants and asking if we can get one

free item

we got the no at starbucks two scoops

free garlic potatoes from amir we just

got a free drink and a free cheeseburger

from mcdonald's success success so we

went to ask at five places and we got

four

yeses and one note we got a black coffee

from java you a cheeseburger for

mcdonald's two full scoops of protein

powder from liquid nutrition some garlic

roasted potatoes from amir if you know

montreal you know that lebanese garlic

potatoes these are like the bomb and

then last but not least we got six mini

donuts from mr puffs we got all of this

for absolutely no cost

just because we asked now talking to

strangers is really nerve-wracking and

that makes me at least sweat a lot and

it makes my clothes pretty stinky so the

sponsor of today's video true earth is a

perfect remedy for that true earth is a

canadian company that makes eco-friendly

products to help you reduce the amount

of plastic that you use in your

household and that you use when you

travel they have a lot of products but

the one that i'm going to show you today

is their eco-friendly laundry strips and

these are actually really amazing both

if you have a laundry machine but also

if you don't have one available at your

disposal in my case all i have is this

sink that i filled with water and i'm

going to show you how you can use these

on the go the first thing that you're

gonna do is you're gonna fill up your

sink with some water and then you're

gonna tear open the true earth packet

take out one laundry strip and then all

you're gonna do is throw it into the

water it will dissolve itself from there

on you just put your clothes in and let

it soak for about 15 or 30 minutes then

take it out rinse it off and voila and

get anywhere you need to now if you want

to try any of their products out then

make sure to hit the link in the

description below and use my discount

code sprout on checkout for 10 off thank

you true earth for continuing to support

me now let's get back to this video

funny enough learning how to talk to

strangers is about everything except for

learning how to talk to strangers it's

about rebuilding one of the most

essential human traits that the human

race has lost in the last 15 years and

after high school i started figuring out

more and more of what i wanted to do in

life and i realized that if i wanted to

have a big brand and be on social media

then there's no way that i could do that

and still be introverted and achieve the

same success that i have planned for

myself in my head and i know for a lot

of you watching it's the same thing even

if you don't necessarily want to be on

social media and running a brand like me

just being able to talk to more people

and open up more doors is probably going

to get you to where you want to be in

life it comes back to you if you're

comfortable with you and you know

yourself do you go up and ask either

they're going to say leave me alone or

nothing that's the bottom line you have

to try in life pretend that you're

abroad no one knows you you know just

asking for some little things you know

what you like about city like what's

what's i don't know where to eat and

everything just like not not not

thinking too far just like hey i just

wanted to tell someone today you know

just asking how they're doing on stuff i

did just have gags for five years so i

know how to go up to strangers i did

this for five years before i used to be

shy when i was younger when i would

prime people i'm like okay what's the

worst that could happen the worst thing

for example right now is that they don't

hug me you know we can't be afraid of

rejection it's important and it's part

of life so yeah you just gotta ask

that is how not to walk up to a stranger

[Music]