Why do we lie? - CrowdScience podcast, BBC World Service

Summary

This episode of *CrowdScience* explores the complexities of lying across different cultures. It highlights how deception serves various social purposes, from protecting feelings in the UK to modesty in China. Experts discuss cultural norms, such as Japan’s distinction between honne (true feelings) and tatemae (public behavior). The show also delves into psychological reasons behind why we lie and how societal trust functions despite our tendency to deceive. With a humorous ending, the interview emphasizes that while lying can be useful, trust remains essential for social harmony.

Takeaways

• 😀 Lying is a universal human behavior, but its motivations vary across cultures and situations.
• 😀 Different cultures have different norms and expectations when it comes to truth-telling. For example, the Netherlands is generally considered more honest than the UK, which values white lies to protect feelings.
• 😀 In Japan, the concept of 'honne' (true feelings) and 'tatemae' (publicly displayed behavior) captures the complex relationship between honesty and social expectations.
• 😀 In China, 'purple lies' are common, where people tell modest lies to downplay achievements or avoid appearing boastful.
• 😀 Psychologist Ian Leslie suggests that the amount of truth-telling depends on cultural norms and the context of the relationship or social group.
• 😀 The concept of lying is seen as not inherently negative—it's often a tool for maintaining social harmony, as opposed to pure deception.
• 😀 Lying can be beneficial in certain situations, such as avoiding trouble or maintaining personal privacy, but excessive dishonesty can create chaos in society.
• 😀 Cultural differences influence how people navigate the tension between honesty and social politeness. For example, British people may lie to be kind or avoid conflict, while others may prioritize truth more directly.
• 😀 A major takeaway is that society's default trust in others is important to avoid chaos, but occasional white lies or modesty-based lies can be part of normal interaction.
• 😀 The interview segment with Derek highlights how some individuals may resist the idea of 'polite lying,' suggesting that what some consider a lie, others see as a necessary social nicety.
• 😀 Despite differing attitudes toward lying, there is a shared understanding that truth-telling is generally preferred, but that the line between politeness and deception can be subjective depending on cultural expectations.

Q & A

What is the main topic of the episode discussed in the transcript?

The main topic of the episode is about lying, including its cultural variations and psychological reasons behind why people lie.

What are the cultural differences in lying mentioned in the episode?

The episode discusses how different cultures have varying attitudes towards honesty. For example, the Netherlands is considered more honest, the UK tends to tell white lies to protect feelings, Japan distinguishes between 'Honne' (true feelings) and 'Tatemae' (public behavior), and in China, 'purple lies' are used to show modesty.

What is the concept of 'Honne' and 'Tatemae' in Japanese culture?

'Honne' refers to a person's true feelings or desires, while 'Tatemae' refers to the behavior and opinions that are publicly displayed, often to maintain social harmony.

How does the episode relate the concept of 'lying' to social and cultural benefits?

The episode explains that lying can benefit individuals by helping them avoid trouble or protect relationships. However, it also emphasizes that lying should be used sparingly and not be the norm, as a balance between trust and honesty is crucial for society.

What does Ian Leslie say about the varying standards of truth-telling across cultures?

Ian Leslie points out that different cultures have different norms for how much truth should be told. For instance, British culture may involve more indirectness or 'white lies' than Dutch culture, which is generally more straightforward.

What is the psychological reason people lie according to the experts in the show?

According to the psychologists interviewed, people lie for personal gain, such as avoiding punishment, protecting their reputation, or minimizing social discomfort. Lying can also be used to protect relationships or maintain social norms.

What is the term 'purple lies' and where is it commonly found?

'Purple lies' are a type of lie commonly found in China, where people lie out of modesty, such as downplaying achievements to appear humble or avoid seeming boastful.

How does Derek's experience contrast with Caroline’s view of the interview process?

Derek expresses frustration with the scientific nature of the interview and implies he didn’t enjoy it, while Caroline maintains a polite demeanor, saying that even if Derek didn’t enjoy the experience, it was still a meaningful conversation.

What does Caroline Steel conclude about the role of lying in society?

Caroline concludes that lying, when used in moderation, is beneficial for individuals and society, as long as it doesn’t undermine trust. She suggests that while we don’t want to lie too much, a certain amount of deception is acceptable in maintaining social harmony.

How does the episode's humor tie into the discussion of lying?

The humor comes through Derek's blunt honesty about not enjoying the interview, which contrasts with Caroline’s polite responses. Their playful exchange at the end highlights the complexities of truth-telling and social politeness, blurring the lines between truth and lie in everyday interactions.