KENDALL JENNER Opens Up About Anxiety, Insecurity, & How To Be Truly Happy! | Jay Shetty

On Purpose Podcast
12 Sept 202253:59

Summary

TLDRIn this heartfelt conversation, supermodel and entrepreneur Kendall Jenner joins Jay Shetty on the 'On Purpose' podcast to share personal insights and life experiences. They delve into topics ranging from the importance of self-care and mental health to the pursuit of happiness and personal growth. Kendall discusses her journey in the modeling industry, the challenges of fame, and her quest for a balanced life. She emphasizes the significance of setting boundaries, valuing personal well-being, and the power of self-love. The discussion highlights the universality of the human experience and the importance of empathy and understanding.

Takeaways

  • 🧘‍♀️ Kendall Jenner emphasizes the importance of self-care and finding happiness within oneself, rather than depending on the actions of others.
  • 🤝 The connection between Jay Shetty and Kendall Jenner was a natural fit, with mutual admiration and a shared desire to discuss mental health and personal growth.
  • 🔮 Kendall manifested her opportunity to connect with Jay Shetty after admiring his work on mental health advocacy and his openness in discussing personal experiences.
  • 💪 The value of determination and setting personal boundaries is highlighted, as Kendall speaks about her journey in the modeling industry and the importance of self-advocacy.
  • 💔 The impact of losing close friends like Virgil Abloh is deeply felt, with the conversation revealing the importance of cherishing relationships and the light they bring to our lives.
  • 💡 Kendall's purpose has evolved from a focus on career success to a deeper commitment to personal happiness and spiritual growth, aiming to connect with others authentically.
  • 🌱 The conversation underscores the significance of curiosity and the exploration of self, with Kendall expressing interest in delving deeper into meditation practices.
  • 🌼 Kendall's goal is to spread love and positivity, aiming to share her journey and insights to inspire others to find their own happiness and purpose.
  • 📵 In a world dominated by social media and constant connectivity, the idea of taking a digital detox or setting boundaries with technology is presented as a valuable practice for mental well-being.
  • 🤗 The power of self-compassion and the importance of being kind to oneself is evident, as Kendall shares personal strategies for fostering a positive self-image and self-talk.

Q & A

  • What was the initial connection between the host and Kendall Jenner that led to this interview?

    -The host and Kendall Jenner initially connected through a mutual friend, Simi and Hayes, and later a conversation with the host's social media manager about potential guests led to the idea of inviting Jay Shetty, which eventually manifested into this interview.

  • How does Kendall describe her experience of working in the modeling industry and the pressures she faced?

    -Kendall describes her experience in the modeling industry as one that required a lot of determination and hard work. She faced pressures and overwork, which led her to set boundaries for herself around the age of 23 to prioritize her happiness and well-being.

  • What personal practice does Kendall mention that she started to improve her mental health?

    -Kendall mentions starting cold plunges and ice baths as part of her personal practices to improve her mental health, as she finds comfort and joy in self-care and working on herself.

  • How does Kendall handle the negative aspects of social media and public perception?

    -Kendall handles negative aspects of social media and public perception by focusing on her 'higher goddess' or higher self, striving to live in a place of happiness that is not affected by external opinions, and using words of affirmation to reassure herself of her worth.

  • What is Kendall's perspective on the importance of self-care and setting boundaries in one's personal and professional life?

    -Kendall believes that self-care and setting boundaries are crucial for maintaining happiness and well-being. She emphasizes the importance of prioritizing oneself and being comfortable with saying no when necessary to avoid burnout.

  • How does Kendall approach the concept of happiness and personal fulfillment?

    -Kendall approaches happiness and personal fulfillment by focusing on her inner self, or 'higher goddess,' and ensuring that her happiness is not dependent on the actions of others. She also values the simple things in life and the time spent with loved ones.

  • What was Kendall's first job and how did it shape her early work ethic?

    -Kendall's first job was a dog walker. This job allowed her to be independent and responsible at a young age, shaping her disciplined work ethic and love for animals.

  • How does Kendall view the importance of authenticity and being true to oneself in the face of public scrutiny?

    -Kendall views authenticity as vital, emphasizing that knowing and staying true to who you are is important despite public scrutiny. She believes that self-awareness and self-love can help counteract false narratives about oneself.

  • What is Kendall's approach to dealing with grief and loss, as mentioned in the context of losing Virgil Abloh?

    -Kendall deals with grief and loss by honoring the memory of the person lost, focusing on their positive impact, and finding comfort in the shared emotions with others who were also affected by the loss.

  • How does Kendall define her 'higher goddess' and what qualities does she believe it encompasses?

    -Kendall defines her 'higher goddess' as a state of being where she is happy, positive, and not affected by external opinions. It encompasses qualities like self-love, authenticity, and emotional stability.

  • What is Kendall's current focus in terms of personal growth and self-improvement?

    -Kendall's current focus is on setting boundaries, managing stress, and not overthinking. She is working on being more present and allowing things to flow more naturally in her life.

Outlines

00:00

🤝 Connection and Manifestation

The paragraph discusses the serendipitous connection between the speaker and Jay Shetty, a best-selling author and host of a health and wellness podcast. The speaker shares how a desire to meet Jay manifested unexpectedly, leading to a deep and meaningful conversation. The discussion highlights the importance of trusting the universe, personal connections, and the joy of self-improvement. It also touches on the speaker's admiration for Jay's work in mental health advocacy and their shared values.

05:00

🌿 A Passion for Horses

This paragraph delves into the speaker's deep-rooted love for horses, which began in childhood and has continued into adulthood. The speaker describes the spiritual connection they feel with horses and the emotional impact it has on them. There's also a humorous anecdote about Jay's wife's allergic reaction to horses during a romantic carriage ride, illustrating the therapeutic nature of animals and the speaker's own experiences with different animals, including cows in India and gorillas in Rwanda.

10:01

👣 Early Jobs and Simple Pleasures

The speaker reflects on their first job as a dog walker and how it suited their introverted nature. They also share stories of their love for animals and the simple pleasures they enjoyed in their youth, such as playing video games and spending time with horses. The paragraph emphasizes the importance of finding joy in simple activities and the evolution of the speaker's appreciation for solitude and self-care, even amidst a busy and social adult life.

15:01

🏆 Achievements and the Journey Inward

The paragraph focuses on the speaker's journey of self-discovery and the realization of their dream to become a model. They recount their determination and the challenges they faced, including periods of overwork and burnout. The speaker shares their decision to set boundaries for their well-being, leading to a more balanced and fulfilling life. The conversation underscores the importance of personal boundaries and the courage to prioritize one's happiness.

20:03

🧘‍♀️ Embracing Self-Care and Mindfulness

The speaker discusses their exploration of self-care practices such as meditation and therapy, prompted by their newfound time and space. They emphasize the importance of personal happiness and not relying on external validation. The paragraph also highlights the speaker's commitment to living in their 'higher goddess' or higher self, a state of inner peace and self-assuredness, and their efforts to maintain this mindset despite occasional setbacks.

25:04

🌱 The Multi-Faceted Nature of Humanity

This paragraph explores the complexity of human nature and the danger of reducing people to singular perceptions. The speaker shares an exercise they use with clients to illustrate the difference between perception and reality, emphasizing the importance of understanding and accepting the multi-dimensional aspects of oneself and others. The discussion also touches on the impact of social media on self-perception and the collective need to focus on positivity.

30:05

💔 Grief and the Power of Connection

The speaker opens up about the loss of close friends, including the renowned designer Virgil Abloh, and the process of grieving. They discuss the shared experience of loss within the community and the importance of remembering and celebrating the positive impact these individuals had on others. The conversation is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the power of maintaining positive memories of loved ones who have passed.

35:06

🌟 The Evolution of Purpose and Self-Understanding

The speaker reflects on the evolution of their purpose from a career-driven individual to someone seeking deeper self-understanding and connection with others. They express a desire to spread love and positivity, especially through social media, and to be a source of inspiration for others. The paragraph highlights the speaker's commitment to personal growth and their aspiration to make a positive impact on the lives of those around them.

40:07

📚 Curiosity and Personal Growth

In this paragraph, the speaker shares their curiosity about meditation and personal growth, inspired by the journey of Michael Singer as described in his book 'The Surrender Experiment'. They discuss their own meditation practices and the desire to delve deeper into mindfulness. The conversation underscores the speaker's commitment to continuous learning and self-improvement.

45:08

🚀 Entrepreneurship and Creative Freedom

The speaker expresses their enthusiasm for founding 818 Tequila and the creative freedom it offers. They discuss the joy of being an entrepreneur and the opportunity to express their creativity without constraints. The paragraph highlights the speaker's passion for learning about the tequila industry and the cultural aspects associated with it.

50:10

🔄 Shifting Values and Priorities

The speaker shares their shift in values, moving away from seeking validation to focusing on personal growth and self-assurance. They emphasize the importance of letting go of external validation and finding peace within oneself. The paragraph reflects the speaker's journey towards self-reliance and inner strength.

📱 Disconnecting to Connect

In the final paragraph, the speaker proposes a hypothetical law that would require everyone to disconnect from their phones for part of the day, emphasizing the importance of taking a break from technology to reconnect with oneself and the world around us. The idea promotes mindfulness and the value of being present in the moment.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Happiness

Happiness in the context of the video is portrayed as a personal state of well-being that is not contingent on external validation or the actions of others. It is a central theme as the speakers discuss the importance of internalizing joy and not seeking it from external sources. For instance, the video emphasizes that true happiness comes from within and is closely tied to self-acceptance and self-love.

💡Manifestation

Manifestation is referenced as the process by which thoughts and desires are brought into reality through belief and positive energy. In the video, one of the speakers mentions having 'manifested' a meeting with the other speaker, suggesting that their intention and positive mindset led to the realization of a desired outcome.

💡Vulnerability

Vulnerability is discussed as the quality of being open about one's feelings, fears, and experiences without fear of judgment. The video highlights the importance of speaking openly about mental health and personal struggles, as demonstrated by the admiration one speaker has for the other's openness in discussing such topics.

💡Self-Care

Self-care is a recurring concept in the video, referring to the practice of taking actions to look after one's own well-being, both physically and mentally. Examples from the script include engaging in activities like cold plunges, journaling, and spending time alone to nurture one's health and happiness.

💡Boundaries

Boundaries are mentioned as essential for maintaining personal well-being and ensuring that one's needs are respected. The concept is illustrated by the speaker's realization of the need to set limits in their professional life to preserve their mental health and personal happiness.

💡Authenticity

Authenticity is the quality of being true to oneself, regardless of external pressures or expectations. The video emphasizes the importance of staying true to one's own values and beliefs, as reflected in the speakers' discussions about living in alignment with their 'higher goddess' or true selves.

💡Grief

Grief is explored as the deep emotional response to loss, particularly in the context of losing someone close. The speakers share personal experiences of grief, discussing the process of mourning and the impact such losses have on their lives, highlighting the shared human experience of loss and the profound effect it can have.

💡Empathy

Empathy is portrayed as the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. One of the speakers identifies as an empath and discusses the importance of being sensitive to the struggles and emotions of others, which is a key aspect of human connection and compassion.

💡Social Media

Social media is discussed in the video as a platform that can sometimes propagate negativity and false narratives about individuals. The speakers express the need for a more positive and balanced representation on social media, advocating for the sharing of uplifting and truthful content.

💡Inner Child

The concept of the 'inner child' is introduced as a therapeutic approach to reconnect with one's younger self and nurture self-love. The video describes a practice of placing a childhood photo on the bathroom mirror to remind oneself of the innocence and love that should be directed towards the self.

💡Validation

Validation is mentioned as something the speakers have learned to move beyond seeking from external sources. It is portrayed as a former concern that is no longer central to their sense of self-worth, illustrating a shift towards internal validation and self-acceptance.

Highlights

The importance of not relying on the actions of others for personal happiness and being in control of one's own well-being.

Jay Shetty and Kendall Jenner's organic connection and mutual admiration, leading to a natural and profound conversation.

Kendall's manifestation of opportunities and her belief in the universe's perfect timing.

The significance of personal connections and comfort in interviews and relationships.

Kendall's journey of self-discovery, mental health advocacy, and her openness in discussing these topics.

The impact of social media and the pressure it can exert on individuals and their self-image.

Kendall's experience with setting boundaries and prioritizing self-care in a demanding industry.

The value of taking time for self-reflection and the activities that bring personal joy.

Kendall's deep connection with horses and the therapeutic benefits of equine interactions.

Jay Shetty's insights on the importance of recognizing and embracing the multi-faceted nature of individuals.

The challenges of navigating the complexities of relationships and the value of honesty and communication.

Kendall's approach to dealing with grief and the importance of honoring the memory of loved ones.

The concept of 'higher goddess' or 'higher self' as a source of inner strength and happiness.

The power of self-affirmation and the practice of speaking positively to oneself.

Kendall's entrepreneurial journey with 818 tequila and the fulfillment of being her own boss.

The idea of disconnecting from technology to reconnect with oneself and the world around us.

Kendall's commitment to spreading love and positivity as a guiding principle in her life.

Transcripts

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if your happiness

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depends on the actions of others

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you know you're at mercy of things that

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you can't control the best-selling

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author and host the number one health

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and wellness podcast on purpose with jay

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shetty

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yeah i'm not even just saying this i

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literally

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think i manifested this like it's the

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after i saw you at simi and hayes house

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so that was a couple months ago and then

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a few weeks ago

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my i was talking to my social media girl

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randomly we were just talking about a

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bunch of stuff um and just kind of what

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i would love to represent just talking

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about a new chapter for me and whatever

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and i was she was like

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who would you really want to like talk

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to or whatever and i was like it'd be so

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cool to talk to jay and she was like

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that would be really cool and then we

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kind of just that was kind of the

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thought and whatever and then you hit me

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and i was like no freaking way he's

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hitting me right now so i was like

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absolutely this is like perfect it's the

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universe just putting it in perfect

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timing because that makes me so happy

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because it was exactly the opposite way

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so i've for a long time had people that

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i'd love to sit down with and every time

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i saw you do something with mental

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health and vogue or any of the segments

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that you ever did i was just like she's

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amazing like you know it's incredible

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the way you were talking about it when

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you'd post about it i'd be like oh this

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is incredible like to see see you

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speaking so openly about it vulnerably

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about it and so i've always wanted to do

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this yeah and then but we've never

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really crossed paths so i'm always just

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a bit like and i don't like asking

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friends of friends when i haven't met

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someone and right so i i was like that

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day i had to like pluck up the card

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i'm just gonna ask for myself no because

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it's easier when i asked and i know

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christy so yeah yeah yeah but i was like

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i it's nice to win this i told my team

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too i was like it's so much nicer when

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there's like a personal connection for

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sure and someone really feels

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comfortable rather than it's like a

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piano no it was it was so perfect like

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when i think back to it i'm like that

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was me just trusting the universe and

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not pushing for anything and i knew it

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was gonna kind of happen when it was

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supposed to and it literally didn't it

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did yeah you felt it too yeah i did that

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means a lot to me yeah and i hope that

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this is the start of spending more time

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together me too yeah off camera too

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i would love that because like i think

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also i don't know like i admire people

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like you i admire like

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you know the the michael pollins and

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michael singers and wim hofs of the

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world and i feel like you fit in that

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category for me of just people that are

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because you know i know a little bit

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about your story i'd like to actually

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know more which would be really cool to

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actually i know we're obviously not here

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next to for that exactly but for me just

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personally like i'd love to know more of

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your story i know that um you've had

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quite the experiences and i think that's

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so cool i'm like so intrigued by people

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with just that amount of curiosity and

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like determination determination and

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patience like that takes so much

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patience to be like you or like any of

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those people that i just listed it's so

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cool to me and i just i wish i wish for

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myself but i'm working on it no you're

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that curious too yeah

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i am it's just you know that that level

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of like i said patience and

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determination is like

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it's a gift like that is like a really

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really amazing gift and

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like i said like i'm just working on it

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all the time and i that's my goal in

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life i guess well i i think i feel the

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same way about you again that and by the

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way i love all these people you just

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mentioned too so yeah so feel very

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honoured to be put into that group of

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people and we've had women on the

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podcast before too so he's been a guest

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but with you

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i feel the same way back when it's like

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when you see someone who is so curious

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who

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could get away with not worrying about

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these things if you don't want to but

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then still being courageous enough to

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talk about these things and then using

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your platform as a space to open up

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these dialogues like that is

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as if not more important as well as as

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doing the work and doing the path yeah i

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mean i can see you doing the work it's

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fun watching you do the work and

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figuring it out i love working on myself

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like it is actually like a passion of

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mine and like i just

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i find so much comfort and joy and like

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actually

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finding where i think i could better

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myself and being like even if it's

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physical like physical as in like my

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physical health or working out or i just

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started doing speaking of wim hof i just

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started doing like cold plunges and ice

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baths and like even if i don't have the

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time to go outside i just got a cold

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plunger i did it right before i got here

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it's the best thing ever

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again it takes so much mental

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the whole thing of it is all mental so

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i don't know just stuff like that i

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really love so i'm always

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i'm always trying to just be the best

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version of me and so i just love that it

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like actually makes me feel really good

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i love self-care and i just love stuff

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like that so it's been really cool but

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it's cool for you

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to say

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that you enjoy seeing that from me

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because there's always been

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kind of this weird part of it for me

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where i'm like is this a pity party

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because i don't want it to be like i

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want this to feel very

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positive i want to connect with people

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and i guess that's that is my goal there

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is to be like there actually is this

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side of me that you might may not know

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of

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but

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the goal here is to connect and also not

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feel like i'm throwing some pity party

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for myself because i want this to be a

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learning experience for everyone i want

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this to be really positive and really

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really well received i want you to look

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at it and actually have a positive

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feeling towards it so i don't know

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you'll find like if i you know when i do

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kind of post about something or when i

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want to talk about something i'm usually

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sharing a tip or like sharing kind of

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like a little technique even if it's

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something so simple as like walking

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outside taking a few deep breaths and

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journaling like yeah it's just that kind

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of stuff that i really like um to share

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because i feel like i want to be helpful

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yeah more than anything absolutely and

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that's how that's at least how i see it

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yeah i see it not completely not as a

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pity party at all but so much more is

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just hey here's a reminder yeah that's

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something that i did yeah i feel like

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that positivity shines through too in

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the way you do it so at least if that

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helps whatever that's worth from the

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outside it definitely comes across that

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way cool and this is easily been the

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warmest introduction to a flower

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conversation i've ever experienced in my

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entire life i'm doing gonna say i was

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actually i was actually really nervous

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coming in here because this means so

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much to me like and i'm serious because

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you know i've done a lot of interviews

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in my life and

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when when thinking about this one or

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thinking about that i even wanted to do

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something like this it just it means a

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lot to me and so it made me a little

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nervous and i was like i just want to

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get this right this isn't like you know

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me going out and promoting something or

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talking about something this is you know

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something very real that um we all

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experience which is just you know

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ourselves and our well-being and just

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everything so yeah and this is this is a

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you know for me genuinely and i really

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do mean this like the podcast has been a

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great excuse or really from my side an

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intention to get to know people and i

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really admire yeah and so for me it's

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been a great way of building new

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friendships and relationships because if

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you can sit and talk to someone and

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really get along with each other you're

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like oh we should do this more often and

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so well i'm honored yeah so for me it's

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definitely been that and

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to me you know

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you saying that and you know taking it

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as intentionally as you are it's you

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know for me it's as important i i always

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share this before we start recording

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usually but we just flowed

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hey everyone welcome back to on purpose

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the number one health podcast in the

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world thanks to each and every single

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one of you that come back every week to

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listen learn and grow now it's very rare

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that i get to sit down with someone that

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i have admired for a very long time from

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afar someone that i believe has inspired

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me through the sharing of their story

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someone who speaks so vulnerably and

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openly about the things that i most care

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about mental health purpose uh the

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journey of life and discovery and

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curiosity and

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what i want to share about this person

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is when i bumped into them at a mutual

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friend's birthday party and i just want

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to give a big big shout out to simeon

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hayes because it wouldn't happen without

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them i love you simeones you've been

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amazing guests on the podcast before as

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well

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i wouldn't have bumped into this

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individual and had this opportunity to

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reach out to them and as soon as i

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reached out this has been the most

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flowing conversation and connection that

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i possibly had on the podcast to be

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honest so i just want to put that out

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i'm speaking about the one and only

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someone who needs no introduction but

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successful business founder

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international supermodel uh founder of

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the incredibly successful tequila brand

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818 and star on the hulu's the

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kardashians which premieres in second

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season on september 22nd the one and

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only kendall jenner kendall thank you so

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much for doing this thanks for having me

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that was a wonderful introduction oh

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well it's it's honestly such an honor

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getting to know someone who

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it's very rare that i find someone who

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functions in with very similar values in

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in a personal connection sense so when i

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reached out to you

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i i really meant everything i said and i

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could have written you an essay but i

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was like let's spare the details

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and then to get your response and then

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for us to be here within a couple of

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weeks of connecting yeah and even your

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message this morning i just want people

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to know i was like

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the the text you sent me this morning i

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was like

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this never like i was like this is

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amazing and i was like but and i was

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literally going to do the same thing and

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so to me i was like this is very rare

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and so i love the synergy and the flow

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that we're experiencing and me too i'm

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excited to get into it now it's funny

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because i called i called hayes before

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um the other day and i was just like oh

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my god i'm going on your friend's show

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and whatever and she was like he's the

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best it's good you're just gonna flow

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right into it he's so easy to talk to

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and that's literally what happened and

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like i told you i just feel like i

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manifested this moment for for both of

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us and for this just this whole

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experience and so i am really happy to

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be here and i'm honestly honored like i

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said i admire you and i there's so many

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people like you that i admire so i think

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sitting down here with you is just so

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cool for me and i get to talk about fun

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things with you

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amazing first of many and i wanted to

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start with because i always like to

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start with just things that i've seen

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more recently a couple of days ago i

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think you posted a beautiful picture of

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you hugging your horse

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and you were like you know like snuggle

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time or something like that and i was

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just like when when did horses become a

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part of your life and

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how did you get so close to them i think

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i've spent many lifetimes with horses i

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think this is very one of many lifetimes

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that i've had i grew up in a horse

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community so where we grew up horses

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everywhere more trails than there were

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homes really and so i was always around

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horses and i just was deeply in love

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with them and i have no explanation and

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that's why i say i feel like in past

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lives i have just been around horses

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yeah so since i was a really young kid

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loved them and

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continued to love them my whole life

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they're just the best they're the most

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majestic and gorgeous and

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spiritual they feel everything i just

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like it's such an honor to be in their

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presence and to be able to do what i can

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do with my horse i find

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so magical that i can stand in her stall

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with her and just like vibe out with her

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i like sometimes come to like a little

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get a little teary-eyed when i'm

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standing in my stall with her because

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i'm like this is so cool that you allow

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me to do this and we have this

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connection without any words it's just

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the best thing ever so i love them yeah

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that's so special i i have a different

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teary eyed story with horses but tell

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you i'll tell you the short version so

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when i proposed to my wife who i can't

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wait to introduce you to when i proposed

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to her which was eight years ago or

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something like that when i proposed to

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her i organized a very what i would

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consider like a very a very hollywood

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proposal it was it was too over the top

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and i would do it totally different

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today with all everything i've learned

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happens yeah it happens it happens and

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so we were walking by the thames in

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london which is where we're both born

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and raised and this acapella group jumps

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out and they're singing bruno mars and

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then like they give her a bouquet of

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flowers and then i get on one knee i

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propose we have dinner by the river and

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then we walk around the corner and

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there's a horse room and carriage to

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take us around

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to take us around london and so we're on

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this carriage we have this beautiful you

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know path through london and then we get

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into the train to get back home to her

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parents to tell them and they already

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knew

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she's got hives all over her face no way

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she was allergic she's allergic to

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horses

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i was like all right so then she was

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like she had tears and when we got back

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her parents were like what did you do to

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her at least you got to enjoy the moment

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but but no i don't i don't know

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no i love horses the same way you do

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like i used to go to india a lot when i

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was a kid and that's where i first

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learned to be with horses

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and i mean they're so therapeutic

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absolutely yeah there's a reason there's

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equine therapy it's the best exactly

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yeah they make me

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they make me when i'm with

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her i have a few but i'm most mostly

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with one of my horses right now because

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her name's delandra i didn't name her

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she came with her name but i call her

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dylan or dill um i love her so much but

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when i'm with her i i genuinely i speak

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of like i sp i spoke about how i've just

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loved horses my whole life i i feel like

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a kid around her like i feel like my 12

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year old self that would get up every

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morning throughout the entire summer at

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8 a.m to go just be at my trainer's

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facility and i would stay there from 8am

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to 8pm i'd ride all her horses i'd groom

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all her horses i would just sit in the

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stalls with all the horses like it just

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anytime i'm with her i just have that

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sense of like being a child again and

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it's a really really good feeling

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animals have that special ability don't

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they like so whichever animal you're

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attracted to and yeah i i never thought

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i would but when i lived as a monk the

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animal that's revered in india is cows

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and you would never think of cows

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being like majestic or you know in that

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way especially when you're not in india

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but the cows in india have these like

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lotus like eyes like their eyes are just

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like absolutely stunning yeah and

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they're so special and they're such

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gentle animals

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and recently radhi and i went uh

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trekking with gorillas in rwanda

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and gorillas are the we have to go that

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sounds unreal it was unbelievable and

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they're the animal that's revered in

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rwanda so whenever they have a new

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gorilla that's born they have a naming

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ceremony with the

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community love that it's so beautiful

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but and then i heard somewhere that you

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your first job was you were a dog walker

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yeah and so i was thinking like do you

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have any lessons or anything you learned

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by being a dog walker i think first jobs

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are so interesting yeah no i mean

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i was always a super disciplined child

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like meaning to my like i just loved i

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would put myself to bed at 7 00 p.m be

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like my mom would be like playing with

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me and my little sister and be like mom

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it's seven i gotta go to sleep like it's

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time for my bedtime she'd be like are

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you okay

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and so i was always that kid and so i i

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think i just was always really eager to

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like work i don't know why i just like

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wanted to always have something to do

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something that i felt passionate about

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that i really enjoyed and so yeah when i

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was young i put some flyers around our

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community and said i would walk dogs and

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i ended up getting people that would get

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let me have their dog for a few hours

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and take it for a walk so i loved

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animals and i liked having something to

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do so i spent i was a kid that liked to

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be by myself

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with animals so like i think that that

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was a cool

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very fitting thing for me because i got

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to be by myself walking but then also

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experience all these little dogs with

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yeah yeah i wish i did i used to deliver

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newspapers so that was my first job and

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it's not as glamorous in london because

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it's raining was that what you were

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desiring or was it no i was just 14

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years old and i wanted to make some

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money just like i need it i was like i

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need to make some money yeah and so i

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was like i'm gonna start doing this and

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you don't get to you know you'd see it

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in the movies

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where the paper boy just like chucks the

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paper at the door but i'd like to

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actually go and put it inside so my only

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interaction with dogs is they were on

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the inside grabbing the paper right and

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so yeah

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yeah and stuff but i always love knowing

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about people's first jobs and how things

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start for them because of you know

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obviously where you are today but

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what do you think it was in those early

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years where

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you just said you were very disciplined

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like it sounds like you were you were

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aware of certain habits that you built

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then

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what were some of the things that you

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feel confident about or

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how how did you look for validation in

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those early years and where did it come

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from for you i mean it's interesting so

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kylie my little sister she was always

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the social butterfly i was always

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i just liked being to myself

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i don't know if that's the scorpio in me

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so it just came naturally or whatever i

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had i had a group of friends who i loved

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but i just i i like can vividly remember

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just on the weekends not running to go

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be with my friends all the time during

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the summer i was with them but on the

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weekends in between school i would i was

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really just

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by myself i would love to like hang out

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in my room i like was kind of a nerd i

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loved video games and like sitting on

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the computer and playing sims all day

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like i just kind of liked being to

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myself and then all day long during the

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summer was with my horses and

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yeah i don't know i just it just brought

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me joy i don't think i have like

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a you know a super long explanation for

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that it was so simple for me as a kid

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like it was just as simple as that made

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me happy and that's just what i wanted

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and it explains i guess a lot of me now

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um i went through like a phase where i

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felt like i had to be around people i

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think i live a very social life and my

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job is very social

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so i was you know kind of conditioned to

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want to be around people a lot and then

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as you know the pandemic came around

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you're not around as many people anymore

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and now i'm just re-enjoying being by

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myself which is really cool yeah and um

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i had the most i had the best day on

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sunday all by myself i got up i went and

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rode my horses

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i like um took my niece to ride her pony

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just me and her was so nice brought her

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back home went to my house got in my

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cold plunge went in my pool laid out

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journaled like i was having the best day

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and i was just pretty much all by myself

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so i i enjoy it so much i love that i'm

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sure that's so refreshing for people to

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hear too because i feel like people may

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from the outside perceive a life which

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obviously like you said for work it's

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busy and it's social and of course you

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have wonderful friends but to know that

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you can feel comfortable in your own

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company and that's been a habit that

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you've developed i crave simple things

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like i i love my life and i love my job

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and i i

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feel so fortunate that i have been

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placed here that for some reason i was

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given this life like i feel

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immensely grateful for that and i have

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had so much fun and i like think back on

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just the experience that i've had the

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experiences that i've had this far and

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it's like it's like it's shocking to me

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i'm like this is so freaking cool that i

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live this life but at the end of the day

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like when i am home and when i'm alone

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like i crave the simple things i love a

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simple day i love just like a simple

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routine and

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being to myself and being around the

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people that i love my small core crew so

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yeah that's beautiful yeah i mean that's

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i think that's what we're all striving

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for is right that passion in our case

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and our work and then the simplicity at

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home what would you say i was thinking

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about this and i've watched so many of

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your interviews and read so much too but

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what would you say for you as being one

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of your like proudest moments or

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greatest achievements or something that

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you really feel like and internally i

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mean like for the basis of our

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conversation like something that really

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brings you joy internally when you think

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about it or when when you had it like i

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said i look back and the things that

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i've accomplished

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just even my job like i think i really

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at one point

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when i was younger decided i want to be

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a model and this is what i want to do

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and the fact that i executed because we

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talk about that determination like i

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really was i was 14 years old when i

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kind of made that decision and was like

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this is what i want to do and i went to

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my mom and i was like please help me do

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this

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and

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i didn't stop until i was 24

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that i was like okay i think i need to

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like take it back a notch which we can

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also get into because that's a very yeah

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kind of dramatic story but like i

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i just knew and i think i'm proud of

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myself for being that kid and being

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determined to do that and then executing

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and doing it to the to the level that i

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had done it and that i i guess i still

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do

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but i i also am proud of

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i think more so the self self-work that

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i've done within that process because

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there was a long period of time i'd say

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the core five years of it that i was

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extremely overworked

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not my happiest not because i wasn't

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doing what i loved but just because i

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was overwhelmed and i was i felt like i

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was saying yes to everything because i

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felt really really grateful and really

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honored to be in the position that i was

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in so i was always saying yes

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and it just took a lot out of me to the

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point where

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i just wasn't happy anymore

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and so i had to set those boundaries for

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myself when i was about 23 24 i'd say

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like what a year before the pandemic so

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yeah i was probably 23.

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i really set boundaries for myself and i

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was like i want to continue to do this

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because this is what i love

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but i need to start

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saying no when i can and prioritizing

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me and prioritizing like

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you know my happiness and my well-being

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yeah and it has done wonders for me like

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i

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feel like i can show up better for

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myself

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and i can show up a better person for

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the people that get to be around me that

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day and you know that i work with on

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that day so

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yeah

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yeah so that's what i'm proud of sorry

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to give you a long answer

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i won't say i was hoping for that

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because i i'm always open to wherever

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anyone's life experience goes but

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there's a part of me that loves hearing

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that like i really appreciate hearing

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that because when you've achieved so

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many incredible things in your career

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which you have to then say well this is

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the part like knowing how to navigate it

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or making the right choices at the right

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time healthy balance the healthy balance

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is so important it's important for all

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of us yeah like we have to this is what

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we're prioritizing you know yeah so how

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did you find the courage to do that at

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the 23 mark as you're saying you're in a

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competitive industry as you said it was

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overworking it's fast-paced i'm guessing

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there's comparison in that industry

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there's competition in that industry

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it's not an easy space to be you're of

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course you know you're in the top 0.01

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in your industry so it's hard

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and the reason i ask this is because i

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work with so many people in this space

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and to have the courage to say no i know

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that if i sort this out then all of this

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is going to be just fine that actually

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takes more courage than we recognize we

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realize that when you have nothing then

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there's nothing to lose you can actually

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have a lot of courage right but when you

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have everything and there's everything

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to lose and a lot of the time at least

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what i've heard in in town is

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you know older managers and agents and

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i'm not saying you have any of this but

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people that i know will be told well hey

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if you don't do this like you'll be

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forgotten next year or you know your

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career is only going to last another six

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months how did you have that courage to

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say no no i need to do this like where

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did that come from and i think that it's

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intere like i've never thought about it

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that way to be completely honest with

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you i just knew

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that if i had gone any further that i

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was going to lose myself i was at that

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very i was on the teeter-totter edge of

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that point where

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had i gone any further

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i was probably not going to be

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great

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it was so important to me

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to feel good that i just knew that it

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was something that i had to do and i

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can't say like

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you're absolutely right like

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there were so many people around me that

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had

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told me not to say no and told or told

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me yeah told me not to say no told me

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not to stop

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i fought my way out of it a little bit

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because there were people that had

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worked for me that you know didn't

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want me to stop because it might have

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benefited them of course um but

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i got to that point and i just knew i

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had to do it and i just i don't know i

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don't know how to explain it i guess

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it was just such an unbelievable

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sensation that i had where i knew that

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if i do this i'm going to be better for

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everyone and i'm going to be better for

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myself which means i'm going to be

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better for the people around me and i

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have to do this and so it wasn't really

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i want to be able to live

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with happiness god forbid any of this

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ever went away and i think that that was

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a big moment for me of being like i'm

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gonna be okay

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if i don't get this job tomorrow and i'm

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gonna be okay if i don't get that job in

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a month if i have to take this time to

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do whatever things will come

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everything's going to work out the way

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it's supposed to and i had to trust that

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yeah well to me on from the outside and

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it's it's beautiful that you didn't see

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it in yourself because that almost makes

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it even more wonderful but the idea that

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to me from the outset that's a lot of

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courage yeah it takes a lot of courage

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it takes a lot of vulnerability and

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openness and and it takes courage at

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every level whether

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someone's thinking about quitting their

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job to do something they love or whether

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someone's trying to relocate their

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family and doesn't know how or whether

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someone like you is feeling success but

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then going well wait wait a minute and i

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think in the past few years we've seen

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athletes and musicians and actors and

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people in all creative industries step

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back and say well i need to put me first

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yeah and i think that that's empowering

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because i think we hear about burnout in

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working culture and corporate culture so

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often for sure so

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what what was it that you started to do

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with that newfound time at that time

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like where was is that where the curio

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was the curiosity always there and now

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you could actually follow it it was it

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was it was always there and i had had a

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lot of people coming to me telling me

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about

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meditation and how it changed their life

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and therapy and so many different things

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and i was a bit overwhelmed because i

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was like oh my god what if this is gonna

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suit me i think it's a very personal

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experience i think everybody has a very

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different version of all of that stuff

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and so it was a little overwhelming so i

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think i really just took the time to be

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off for a second it was even the little

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things it was like being able to go to

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my friend's birthday party which i

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wouldn't have been able to go to before

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because i was working a lot i love

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hearing that because i think it is those

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simple things like

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you know giving yourself that space yeah

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whatever it is that you needed to do

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yeah when you needed it and and like you

play25:49

said sometimes it's like that's when all

play25:51

the subscribe buttons come up in front

play25:52

of you and it's like try this and try

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this and it's like well no no let me

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just take my time

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it was also now that i think about it

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yeah 23 i'm 26 i've had my horse for so

play26:03

around that time

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is when i bought the horse that i have

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now

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who

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is my like i i jump her and i like how i

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have two other horses but they're like

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retired so i don't really ride them the

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same way i ride her so yeah i guess it

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was around that time too that i was like

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i'm going to do this because i love this

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and like i want to get back into it and

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this is what i've loved my whole life so

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so it was around that time that i feel

play26:26

like all of that started happening and i

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bought my horse and i like started

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taking more time for things that made me

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really happy yeah what i what i'm

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noticing in you and observing or at

play26:36

least from

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i was just saying it's like it feels

play26:42

like no matter what's happening in your

play26:44

orbit

play26:45

there's this pillar of belief that

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it's important to be happy yeah like you

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know that's like this core center belief

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in your life where it's like it's

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important to be happy it's important to

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be happy it's

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that has to be the goal for sure and

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you know it's not always

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easy

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we live in such an interesting industry

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and in such an interesting time with

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social media that it can be very hard

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sometimes

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you can fall victim to so many things

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that

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don't serve you and that don't make you

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happy

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if your happiness

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depends on the actions of others

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you know you're at mercy of things that

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you can't control

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and that's never

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where i want to be so i i always want to

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live in like

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me and my therapist talk about like my

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higher goddess my higher self like i

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always want to live there

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knowing that

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you know when i'm there you can't take

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that away from me that that's mine and

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no matter what you can disagree with me

play27:46

you can agree with me that's not going

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my i'm not changing i'm not shifting i'm

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here i'm in my higher goddess so

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i kind of

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i always live by like

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holding my happiness and not letting

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anyone else affect it and though i fall

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victim to it at times of course we as we

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all probably do absolutely i um i strive

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every day to live in that place so what

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are what are some of the qualities of

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your higher goddess so that that kind of

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uh avatar like she's awesome

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like i said i don't love a pity party i

play28:18

also like you know sometimes it feels

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weird to like say good things about

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yourself but i've also learned a lot

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about talking to myself and a lot about

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looking in the mirror and being like

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you're great you're gorgeous you're

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amazing you're loyal you're positive

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you're so many like i love words of

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affirmation i love

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just sitting there and reassuring myself

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of who i am because

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that's another thing for me you know

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there's

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so many false narratives about me about

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all of us i'm sure like

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so many people think they have you

play28:51

figured out when they don't even know

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the half of it

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so sitting there and being like you know

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you get frustrated sometimes it could

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feel really unfair you could be reading

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something that someone is saying about

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you or hearing something that someone's

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saying about you and being like that is

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so unfair because that's not who i am

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and that really

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gets to me sometimes and that really

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sucks but then looking at myself in the

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mirror and being like but i know who i

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am and that's all why does anything else

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matter

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and my friends know who i am and my

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family knows who i am my dog knows who i

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am my horse knows who i am like why does

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any of everything else is just noise i i

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do this exercise i don't think i've

play29:28

shared this before but i do this

play29:30

exercise with some of my clients where

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we'll go on a walk and we'll be on a

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hike wherever we are

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and i'll ask them what they think a

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piece of you know maybe there's a little

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leaf or maybe there's some a flower or

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something that looks a little unique on

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the path

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and i'll say what do you think that

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feels like and what do you think it

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would feel like if you picked it up in

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your hand

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and they'll be like oh it looks really

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rough and like it might scratch me and

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like it looks like a bit you know like

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uneven or whatever and it looks kind of

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hard and strong and then i'll ask them

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to pick it up

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and nine times out of ten

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it's completely different like they'll

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pick it up and it'll just dissolve in

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their hands or they'll turn it over and

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the color is really soft

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and sorry the shape the shapes really

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soft and the color is totally different

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on the other side and i do that exercise

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to help us realize just how

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multi-faceted humans are yeah today i've

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got to meet you and and obviously we're

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spending a lot of deep intimate

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vulnerable time together so you learn

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faster about someone but if someone only

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follows someone on social media or only

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see someone at an event or only sees one

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interview it's so easy to create such a

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singular view of someone right and i

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think and i want to say this because i

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really think we all feel it i don't

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think anyone wants to be seen

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in a singular way

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if you had to choose one word

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that had to be you for the rest of your

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life i don't think anyone wants that of

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course you know that we're

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messy and complex

play30:55

and different of course but we like to

play30:58

put someone else in a box whoever that

play30:59

may be

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because it's easier then to live life

play31:03

and say okay well that's persons a b

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right yeah so

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there's this beautiful piece of wisdom

play31:09

that i always share from

play31:10

charles horton cooley and he wrote this

play31:12

in 1890 i think it was which just shows

play31:16

how true this has been for such a long

play31:17

time and obviously long before that as

play31:19

well

play31:20

and he said the challenge today is i'm

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not what i think i am i'm not what you

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think i am

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i am what i think you think i am

play31:30

and we'll let that blow everyone's mind

play31:32

it gives me chills every time i say it

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yeah charles walton cooley said the

play31:36

challenge today is i'm not what i think

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i am i'm not what you think i am

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i am what i think you think i am and

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what he's trying to say is that we live

play31:46

in a perception of a perception of

play31:49

ourselves so if i think

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you think i'm smart then i allow myself

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to feel smart right it's like we need

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that value we need that validation or if

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i think you think i'm not smart then i

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feel hurt yeah and and the challenge is

play32:04

i don't know what you're thinking at all

play32:05

especially outside in the world and so i

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find that what you're saying around like

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what do i think about myself like how do

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i feel about myself how do the people

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that actually know me feel about me i

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think that's really empowering i wanted

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to ask you because i feel like from from

play32:18

what i've seen and from what i've heard

play32:20

you have you have great friendships you

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have a great relationship with your

play32:22

families you said like

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what do you think have been really great

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habits or

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traits in relationships that have helped

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you build up good friendships and and

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family relations because i think for so

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many people sometimes their friendships

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and their family can often be the most

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difficult part but i feel like the way

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you communicate the way you're talking

play32:40

about it i'm like okay there's some

play32:41

really good habits in place here yeah

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have there been any principles or rules

play32:44

that you've learned along the way that

play32:46

have been

play32:46

helpful i mean of course honesty

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um i'm a big

play32:51

person on like keeping a really honest

play32:54

healthy communicative relationship

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um but i also think like

play32:59

i find it really important to have

play33:02

not feel like you're on top of each

play33:03

other when you have your family around

play33:05

or your friends around it's okay to like

play33:07

sometimes even if you're at like a

play33:09

family dinner running to the bathroom

play33:10

and just being like let me just take a

play33:11

couple breaths

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because this is getting overwhelming you

play33:14

know what i mean so i just love to like

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take a second my feelings are valid like

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sometimes my family's a lot which i bet

play33:22

everyone already knows

play33:24

everyone's families have a sense of

play33:26

crazy to them but but i think that i can

play33:29

get really overwhelmed really easily i

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am prone to just you know

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a good amount of anxiety and just being

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extremely overwhelmed and kind of taking

play33:38

everything too seriously sometimes so i

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like to just step away sometimes and

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just be like this is okay i'm allowed to

play33:44

feel this way it's valid i'm just going

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to take a deep breath and i'm not going

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to react and then i'm going to go back

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out there and i'm going to be fine

play33:49

sometimes i do that

play33:51

i love that i love how easy it is

play33:53

no one needs to learn a new meditation

play33:55

practice

play33:56

or a new thing sometimes

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it's as simple as that yeah it's as

play33:59

simple as that i love that i you know

play34:01

one of the things that you know which

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which really touched my heart when i saw

play34:05

this because i think when

play34:07

things happen in culture and and

play34:08

everyone talks about it but but

play34:09

sometimes you're like okay well i can

play34:11

tell that there's a real connection here

play34:12

like when when you lost virgil right

play34:15

like that when i when i saw your message

play34:17

and what you spoke about it i was like

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wow this is this is someone who had a

play34:20

really deep connection with this

play34:21

individual and going through grief is

play34:23

really really tough like you know people

play34:25

who lose and i lost uh two really close

play34:28

people to me during the pandemic i'm

play34:29

sorry uh one was thank you one was one

play34:32

was my spiritual teacher since i was 12

play34:33

years old and he died of stage four

play34:36

brain cancer and i hadn't seen him

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during the pandemic i couldn't go back

play34:40

for his because that was still when it

play34:41

was like yeah locked down yeah he

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couldn't go back for his funeral

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and

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you know he'd been the person who'd been

play34:47

such a key piece of my life

play34:49

and then the other person pretty much in

play34:51

the same year was my best friend as a

play34:55

monk so he was still a monk wow and he

play34:57

happened to get cancer and he passed

play34:59

away in the pandemic i couldn't see him

play35:00

either and he was my age and so to lose

play35:02

someone that was you know he was still

play35:04

there and so

play35:06

yeah and so and so when i saw your

play35:08

you know your

play35:09

wonderful tribute to virgil as well i

play35:11

was like you know how how do you process

play35:13

something like that when you know it's

play35:15

not only industry friends but genuine

play35:17

friendship beyond that and just how yeah

play35:20

well my first thought here is why is it

play35:22

always the best people like why is it

play35:24

always these people that are just such

play35:27

balls of light in everyone's life it's

play35:30

like so you just think about it and

play35:31

you're like this is so unfair and you're

play35:33

going through every emotion

play35:35

and

play35:36

to be honest it was really shocking

play35:38

because not everyone knew what he was um

play35:42

going through and suffering from so it

play35:44

was really shocking um i'll never forget

play35:47

the day i found out and

play35:50

it just

play35:51

absolutely obviously breaks your heart

play35:53

and

play35:55

you can't help but be like oh my god did

play35:58

i did i ever say enough did i ever tell

play36:01

him enough

play36:02

it's really interesting to share that

play36:04

feeling with so many people yeah it

play36:07

feels good in a way and you're just like

play36:09

everyone it makes you feel so human and

play36:12

you're sharing this emotion with people

play36:14

that knew him people that didn't know

play36:16

him people that just loved him from afar

play36:19

and it's just

play36:20

a really

play36:22

beautiful and incredible thing to a

play36:24

certain degree but then also just

play36:26

obviously the most

play36:28

devastating thing it hits so hard when

play36:31

so many people are talking about it and

play36:33

so many people are affected by it so

play36:35

it was definitely um

play36:37

a really shocking

play36:39

really sad time yeah it was yeah yeah

play36:43

and those and and it's really

play36:44

interesting what you said there it's

play36:45

like why and and i had that with my

play36:46

spiritual teacher for sure i was just

play36:48

like

play36:49

like he was you know and and what's

play36:52

really powerful about what i could at

play36:54

least remember from him at that time was

play36:56

that even though he had staged for brain

play36:58

cancer which means he'd lost his

play37:00

short-term memory and a lot of his

play37:02

long-term memory is impaired if you ever

play37:04

met him

play37:06

he would just thank you for your service

play37:07

to god like he would just say thank you

play37:09

for everything you're doing for other

play37:10

people and he would just be grateful

play37:13

and i was just like that's exactly how v

play37:15

was too he was the most

play37:17

positive

play37:19

lived life

play37:21

like

play37:21

appreciative wanted to say yes to

play37:24

everything wanted to just be there for

play37:27

everyone

play37:28

you could literally ask him to design a

play37:30

pencil for you and he would be like

play37:32

it'll be done tomorrow what do you what

play37:33

else do you need like he just had so

play37:37

much to give and he gave it

play37:39

and that wasn't that was pre his

play37:42

diagnosis that was like that was just

play37:44

who virgil was

play37:46

and so to then find out what he found

play37:49

out at a certain point in his life and

play37:50

still be that person and still like i'm

play37:52

gonna show up for everyone and like

play37:55

my time here is so special to all these

play37:57

other people and i'm going to like be

play37:59

here

play38:00

to make them feel amazing it's just like

play38:03

unreal like it makes you just be like

play38:05

what yeah like how you're saying how

play38:08

could you be that incredible and giving

play38:10

like that is so crazy there wasn't a

play38:12

selfish bone in that man's body like he

play38:15

was just the best yeah but i'm sorry to

play38:17

hear about your oh no no i i think it's

play38:19

it's actually

play38:20

nice speaking about people that we both

play38:22

love in in

play38:23

a in a similar way even though they're

play38:25

in such different places in life doing

play38:27

very different things yeah but to talk

play38:29

about someone's and i think that's a big

play38:30

part of it for me at least with grief

play38:32

that i feel like when i talk about the

play38:34

beautiful qualities of the people that i

play38:36

lost

play38:37

it gives me so much

play38:39

confidence that

play38:41

they want me to live it and they want me

play38:43

to try and embody it and that how

play38:45

fortunate we are to have experienced

play38:47

that type of humanity yeah like you know

play38:50

and those are my thoughts of him like

play38:52

i think all we ever really want as human

play38:54

beings is to be you know when we do

play38:56

leave this earth we want to be

play38:57

remembered so beautifully and positively

play39:00

positively i know at least i do of

play39:02

course but like you just want you of

play39:05

course want to make people feel

play39:06

something and he made so many people

play39:09

feel something and for that it is so

play39:11

special like they say that we you know

play39:13

we have our purpose here and i know that

play39:15

he fulfilled a purpose here that he was

play39:18

supposed to fulfill and i think that

play39:20

that's i think about it beautifully like

play39:23

i obviously it's a very very sad

play39:25

situation and it and it breaks my heart

play39:28

but

play39:29

i have nothing but beautiful thoughts of

play39:31

him and i think that's really cool and

play39:33

really special so yeah you thank you for

play39:35

sharing that too and i i had to ask you

play39:37

because

play39:38

yeah i just i feel i love hearing

play39:40

amazing things about amazing people that

play39:42

you know because i think so many of the

play39:44

most incredible people i grew up reading

play39:46

about people that i never met and i

play39:48

spent a lot of my life studying books

play39:50

about people that i never met so malcolm

play39:51

x and martin luther king and einstein

play39:54

and people that i really see as people

play39:56

that have directed so much of my life

play39:58

from how they lived

play40:00

and i feel like he was potentially one

play40:02

of those people that i never met him

play40:04

because whenever i hear about him i'm

play40:05

just like for sure oh this is someone

play40:07

that we could learn from you you spoke

play40:09

about purpose there i was wondering how

play40:11

has your purpose changed you had this

play40:13

very

play40:14

confident view of i want to be a model

play40:16

you know

play40:17

you've superseded exceeded and continue

play40:19

to flourish in that world and i always

play40:21

wish that you do

play40:23

how has your purpose evolved as that

play40:25

time's gone on

play40:26

i think i've learned a lot i've learned

play40:28

a lot about myself about what i want

play40:31

from my life and which is kind of what

play40:32

we've been talking about but um

play40:35

i'm actually really excited

play40:37

to get older and to learn so much more

play40:40

about not only myself but like

play40:43

the journey and the path that i i guess

play40:45

want to take and want to be on so

play40:48

i'd say you know my purpose has evolved

play40:51

from obviously

play40:53

within business doing what i want to do

play40:55

and

play40:56

making sure i'm happy and finding the

play40:58

thing that i love and all those things

play41:00

but i've kind of like i said really

play41:03

tuned in to me and i think my purpose at

play41:05

least at this very moment and what i've

play41:07

kind of evolved into is

play41:09

is my higher goddess like i am

play41:11

determined to tune into her at all times

play41:14

but also

play41:16

as i get older i have so much that i

play41:18

want to connect

play41:22

with other people and with

play41:24

you know aka social media and people

play41:26

that may not know me personally um and

play41:29

just you know the following like i said

play41:31

i i was given this life for some reason

play41:34

for whatever reason i was placed here

play41:36

and i do feel a purpose to

play41:39

share and connect and put a smile on

play41:42

people's faces or make someone feel a

play41:44

positive feeling and so i think that

play41:47

within me wanting to achieve

play41:49

me tuning into my higher goddess i think

play41:51

that also entails me being a great

play41:54

version of myself

play41:56

for other people to then

play41:58

experience and my tips and my tools and

play42:01

whatever i can share whatever help i can

play42:03

give i i really um you know as corny as

play42:06

it sounds i want to spread love like i

play42:08

want people to feel love i that's

play42:11

really i guess the purpose yeah that's

play42:14

that's beautiful i mean more can you ask

play42:15

for yeah right yeah and and it is funny

play42:18

that so much of the stuff that is corny

play42:20

or you know whatever that's the stuff

play42:21

that's true right

play42:22

that's the stuff it is like there's also

play42:25

just we all just like live in such a

play42:27

it's an interesting time obviously and

play42:30

it can feel really negative

play42:32

and

play42:33

i tend to stay off of

play42:35

platforms like social media platforms

play42:37

because it's hard to look at sometimes

play42:39

and it feels really negative so i feel

play42:41

like we all just need a little bit of a

play42:42

smile sometimes i agree i agree i i post

play42:46

these uh

play42:47

videos every day which are just these

play42:49

fun

play42:50

silly things that happen in the world

play42:51

that my my team will find i'll find and

play42:53

i post them every day literally for that

play42:55

reason and that reason only because i'm

play42:57

like i may or may say may or may not say

play42:59

something that makes someone smile right

play43:01

but this definitely works like this this

play43:04

without a doubt will bring some joy to

play43:05

someone's life and if if this is the

play43:07

only joy that someone experienced i want

play43:08

them to see good in the world and

play43:10

believe that there's good enough that's

play43:11

one of my favorite things to see on um

play43:14

tick tock when i sit in my bed at night

play43:15

and fall victim to tick-tock i love to

play43:17

see there's people that i'll post like

play43:20

um here's like five amazing facts that

play43:23

have happened in the world in the last

play43:24

couple weeks or whatever and it'll be

play43:25

like

play43:26

the you know pandas are not extinct

play43:28

anymore and like the great barrier reef

play43:31

is coming back and stuff like that and

play43:32

so i'm like that's so cool that's what i

play43:34

want to hear exactly and

play43:36

you know if it was like it's going down

play43:38

it's like it's going to get a lot of

play43:39

likes and hits but right if it's going

play43:41

up it doesn't get the same attention

play43:43

yeah why do we like gravitate towards

play43:45

the negative so much like no very

play43:47

interesting we have to retrain i i

play43:49

genuinely believe it's just a pattern

play43:51

it's a pattern and a habit that's been

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added absolutely for so long absolutely

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and we have to retrain ourselves the

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clickbait of it all and the whole thing

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and we're like

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that's going downhill i need to see

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what's happening and we're just like

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we do need to retrain our brains that's

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exactly what it is yeah and it starts

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with what you said earlier it starts

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with how we see ourselves

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it is all from that if someone looks in

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the mirror as you were saying earlier or

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if someone just reflects on themselves

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not in them physically but just

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internally yeah most of us will spot all

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the negative things about ourself and

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then we take that out into the world and

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spot all the negative things about

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everyone else and then we take that out

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into social media right so that just

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propels from

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if it's all a reflection it's all yeah

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if we ask someone to sit down and write

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down as you said we feel uncomfortable

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taking a compliment or we feel

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uncomfortable saying saying nice about

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herself exactly and so it all starts

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with our relationship with ourselves if

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we were able to find

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three good things about ourselves today

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i promise you you're gonna find three

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good things about the person sitting

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right

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and that will right exactly

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i

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do a lot of like inner inner child work

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with my um therapist and there's

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actually a trend on tick tock that was

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going around but um coincidentally

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enough we ended up naturally speaking

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about it in my session and it was like

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this trend on tick tock i guess that was

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like um

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like a girl being like anytime you're

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being mean to yourself just think this

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is who you're talking about and it

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flashes to like a photo of her as a kid

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and so i me and my therapist were

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talking about something similar and she

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was like why don't you find like a photo

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of yourself and put it on your bathroom

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mirror so that every morning every night

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every day when you walk into your

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bathroom mirror you're looking at her

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and you're remembering that if there's

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anything negative that you're ever

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saying about yourself if you're ever

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being mean to yourself you're talking

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about her and so i did that and i went

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into my um i went into like my

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memorabilia closet in my house and i was

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looking through old like photo books and

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i've seen these photo books my whole

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life i've literally seen every photo

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that's been in here

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and i like flipped to a page and there

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was a photo i'd never seen of myself

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ever it was a polaroid so it was the

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original photo and it was just me as a

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little girl with a bow in my hair and a

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dress on and i have like a little alien

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tattoo or something right here and i'm

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like have this big cheesy smile on my

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face and i was like that's the photo i'm

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putting on my thing i can show you the

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photo later i have a picture of it on my

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phone but um so i pasted it on my

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bathroom mirror and i talked to her and

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i'm always like if i'm ever looking in

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the mirror and being negative towards

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myself or anything i always look right

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over to her and i'm like she's dope i

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love her and so it's just another way of

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just self-love i love that that's such a

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great tool that's such a great tool my

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team found a kid picture of me and made

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an embarrassing version of that trend so

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i'll show you that too oh awesome okay

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so you know it yeah exactly i know

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exactly what you're talking

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you were saying earlier that you know

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you you wanted to come here and you you

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wanted to share and you manifested and

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you there were things you wanted to

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share what is it that's on your heart

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that

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you've wanted to share that maybe we

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didn't go there today already or is

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there something on your mind and heart

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as an experience or a any anything that

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really drew you here and made this

play46:59

happen right like

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i want to honor that i think we've

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obviously we've honestly touched a lot

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of what i felt like i would have loved

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to get off my heart i don't know i was

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really excited honestly to come here

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and

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share

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a little bit of me that i feel is very

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sometimes scary for me to share and like

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i said i came in here and i was a little

play47:22

nervous because this is important to me

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and like this part of

play47:27

you know everyone's journey and and what

play47:29

we're talking about today is it's so

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important i really that was i guess my

play47:33

intention here today was to come in and

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share a little bit of me and maybe for

play47:38

whoever's watching they find some

play47:40

comfort in this or some joy from this or

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they understand me a little bit more you

play47:45

know what i mean so i think that we've

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hit a lot of really cool points and

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yeah i mean i feel i feel really good

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good i wanted to honor that i i asked

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that because

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you know i think i think when

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when you feel you're in that flow with

play47:58

someone and yeah i feel like you know

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we've learned so many new things about

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you today and there's so many moments

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where i'm like i just feel like you're

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so comfortable and and you've been so

play48:07

open with us but i just wanted to honor

play48:09

that thank you and make sure that you

play48:10

feel that you've really felt heard and

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seen i appreciate that thank you so much

play48:15

so we all want to just be understood at

play48:17

the end of the day so

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i think the closer you get to

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people

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humans the closer you get to people of

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different backgrounds and different

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walks of life

play48:28

the more you start to recognize how

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similar we all are yeah exactly and how

play48:32

many challenges we all share

play48:35

despite how much money someone has in

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the bank despite how much fame someone

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has despite how much followers someone

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has

play48:40

and what we find is that everyone feels

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their own guilt for where they are and

play48:44

everyone feels their own pressure for

play48:46

where they are and everyone feels their

play48:48

own challenge for where they and you

play48:49

just start to realize that we all have

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the same emotions exactly in different

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mixes yeah we're all just having a human

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experience exactly we're all just going

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day by day

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i think we all need to be a little bit

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kinder to each other and just

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take it easy on some people so because

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we are

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we're all we all have our own struggles

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and um

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i don't know i'm an empath so i like

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feel for things and i feel for people

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and

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um

play49:17

yeah yeah and it starts with you the the

play49:20

person right yeah exactly i thought you

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meant me i was like i don't know i don't

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know

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i was just like thank you

play49:26

i went back to our listeners

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i found that the days i stopped judging

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myself i stopped judging others because

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it it changed how i

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saw humanities yeah uh kendall we end

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every on-purpose episode with a final

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five which is a fast five round i ask

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you a question and you answer it

play49:50

with a one word or one sentence maximum

play49:53

so it's super quick okay okay and we

play49:55

have to whisk you away because you need

play49:56

to you need to go to your next

play49:57

appointment uh but okay so the first

play50:00

question is what's something you're

play50:02

curious about right now

play50:03

oh um

play50:05

i am super curious about

play50:09

i was saying how i love um michael

play50:12

singer and i think what i really love

play50:14

i'm reading uh the surrender experiment

play50:16

right now and i'm only in the first

play50:17

couple chapters so he's basically this

play50:18

is not a quick answer it's great i love

play50:20

it though please please he's basically

play50:22

at the first part of the book where he's

play50:24

talking about how he was curious about

play50:26

meditation and how he got into

play50:28

meditation and how he really just was

play50:30

like on a trip with his friends and his

play50:32

girlfriend in the woods and like sat in

play50:33

a corner or sat at a tree and was like

play50:35

i'm gonna just really dive into this and

play50:36

see what happens

play50:38

that's what i'm curious about right now

play50:39

it's just actually like i meditate i do

play50:42

a lot of breathing work breathing

play50:43

exercises and i just really want to tap

play50:45

in

play50:46

yeah like michael singer did i love that

play50:48

that's beautiful that's a great answer

play50:49

that's a great answer uh second question

play50:52

if there's anything that you're working

play50:53

on personally right now what are you

play50:54

working on on yourself is there any yes

play50:56

um i'm working on

play50:59

i'm working on boundaries and i'm

play51:01

working on

play51:02

not

play51:03

i'm a stressor like i can stress about

play51:06

things in my mind and i overthink and i

play51:09

just so i'm really working on like

play51:11

calming down and just letting things

play51:14

flow better and not being so controlling

play51:17

over things especially that i can't

play51:18

control love

play51:20

question number three uh what's your

play51:22

favorite thing about founding 8-1-8 oh

play51:26

being an entrepreneur and being a

play51:27

founder probably that like i

play51:29

i

play51:30

you know was a model and i worked for

play51:33

people a lot i kind of love being my own

play51:35

boss and really being able to

play51:38

have my own creative

play51:40

a place where i can

play51:41

be creative and just really express my

play51:44

creativity and have so much fun doing

play51:46

all of that creative stuff and i've

play51:48

learned so much and learning about the

play51:50

culture and learning about the tequila

play51:52

and everything like i've just had the

play51:53

best time so i love that uh question

play51:56

number four what's something you used to

play51:57

value but you don't value anymore

play52:00

validation

play52:03

great honestly i don't care anymore

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great lens at least i'm telling myself

play52:07

that yes yeah well we have to make it a

play52:09

thought first right yeah no but it's

play52:11

true like i used to care so much more

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about validation i really don't care

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anymore at least i'm happy to thank you

play52:18

fifth and final question if you could

play52:20

create one law that everyone in the

play52:22

world had to follow what would it be

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oh

play52:25

i would do like

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on like a sunday you have to take half

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the day and like not look at your phone

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or something great i love that that's a

play52:33

legit look that's great right yeah kind

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of nice or the full day for being really

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crazy i love that idea i love that uh

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ken jenner everyone this was amazing

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kind of this

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honestly uh and i'm excited to catch up

play52:47

afterwards too yeah there's there's just

play52:49

so much flow and synergy in this whole

play52:51

thing happening and i can thank you more

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for

play52:53

doing this with me here on on purpose

play52:56

and i hope that this is the first of

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many times that we'll do this but i hope

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it's the beginning of a beautiful

play53:01

friendship for sure in relationship and

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uh for sure i wanna everyone who's been

play53:05

listening or watching back at home

play53:06

please let me and kendall know tag us

play53:08

letting us know what resonated with you

play53:10

what connected with you like what was it

play53:12

that you've got curious about or what

play53:14

was something she said that just shifted

play53:16

your perspective or where you learned

play53:18

something new i'd love to hear it i know

play53:19

there were tons of moments for me where

play53:22

i was listening going this is amazing

play53:24

this is incredible this is awesome so

play53:25

any wisdom nuggets that stuck out to you

play53:28

please let us know because i love seeing

play53:30

uh what made a difference in your life

play53:31

as well and

play53:33

a big thank you to kendall for opening

play53:34

our heart and

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opening up our minds thank you i'm

play53:37

honored thank you so much thank you so

play53:39

much thank you that's amazing

play53:41

if you want even more videos just like

play53:44

this one make sure you subscribe and

play53:45

click on the boxes over here i'm also

play53:48

excited to let you know that you can now

play53:50

get my book think like a monk from

play53:53

thinklikeamonkbook.com

play53:55

check below in the description to make

play53:57

sure you order today

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