Anny Explains Why She Went on Hiatus

Summary

In this heartfelt and emotional stream, the creator opens up about their struggles with loneliness, mental health, and the challenges of being a content creator. They share their experience of going on hiatus due to toxic comments and emotional burnout, reflecting on the toll of public criticism and the pressure to please others. Despite their struggles, the creator expresses gratitude for their community's support and the desire to heal. The stream emphasizes themes of vulnerability, self-acceptance, and the journey to mental recovery, encouraging others to focus on their well-being while navigating the complexities of online life.

Takeaways

• 😀 The speaker, Honey, feels overwhelmed with emotions and excitement as they reconnect with their community after a hiatus.
• 😀 Honey expresses feelings of loneliness due to not having many people to talk to, especially given the time zone differences with friends.
• 😀 The speaker reflects on missing streaming but also acknowledges the emotional toll it has taken on them, leading to their decision to take a break.
• 😀 Honey discusses how toxic comments and online hate have affected them, leading to burnout and a period of reflection.
• 😀 The speaker confesses that they are a people-pleaser, which has led to them internalizing negative comments and becoming emotionally drained.
• 😀 Honey recognizes the importance of focusing on self-worth and not giving power to online hate or negativity.
• 😀 Despite the challenges, Honey continues to struggle with balancing the desire to stream again and the fear of facing more online criticism.
• 😀 The speaker acknowledges that content creators face unique emotional challenges, making it harder to deal with hate than viewers might realize.
• 😀 Honey reveals that last year was particularly difficult, leading to a mental breakdown, which still impacts their ability to heal and move forward.
• 😀 The speaker shares an experience with a roller coaster ride that made them realize their emotional numbness due to the emotional turmoil they've been through.
• 😀 Honey openly admits to having a depressive disorder, which has significantly affected their mental health and continues to require work on healing and recovery.

Q & A

Why did the speaker go on a hiatus from streaming?

The speaker went on hiatus due to a combination of personal struggles, including mental health issues and the toxicity they experienced from people online. They felt emotionally drained by the negativity and needed time to heal.

How does the speaker feel about their relationship with their viewers?

The speaker feels conflicted about their relationship with their viewers. While they appreciate the support and care, they also struggle with negative comments and the pressure to please everyone. They express feeling overwhelmed by the responsibility of managing public perception.

What is the speaker’s emotional state currently?

The speaker is still working through their emotional struggles, especially after a difficult year. They mention experiencing depression and emotional numbness, and they acknowledge that their mental state is fragile. However, they are actively working on healing and improving their mental health.

How does the speaker cope with the negativity online?

The speaker tries to distance themselves from the negativity but admits it's challenging. They recognize that they have given too much power to toxic individuals in the past, but are now working on not letting the hate affect them as much.

What does the speaker think about their ability to return to streaming?

The speaker is uncertain about returning to streaming full-time. While they miss it, they feel emotionally drained and unsure whether they can handle the pressures and negativity that come with it. They are still working through their mental health and emotional recovery.

What experience did the speaker share about their emotional numbness?

The speaker shared that they recently went on a very scary roller coaster but felt nothing during the ride. This experience was used to illustrate how emotionally numb they've become due to the intense mental struggles they’ve been facing over the past year.

What did the speaker learn from their time away from streaming?

The speaker learned that while they missed streaming, they felt better not doing it. This reflects their ongoing struggle with balancing their mental health and the demands of their online presence.

How does the speaker feel about being watched by a large audience?

The speaker acknowledges that although they see themselves as a 'nobody' on the internet, they have a significant following. They express confusion and discomfort over the amount of attention they receive and the negative comments that come with it.

What does the speaker say about people who watch content they don't like?

The speaker points out that while viewers can choose what to watch, it's different for content creators who are directly impacted by the feedback and negativity. They note that it's easier for viewers to avoid content they dislike, but creators have to deal with it regularly.

What kind of support does the speaker seem to appreciate from their community?

The speaker appreciates the warm and welcoming support from their viewers. They express gratitude for the care and understanding shown by their community, especially after returning from their hiatus.