What the Female Gaze Really Sees (vs Male Gaze)

Summary

This video explores the nuanced aspects of male attractiveness from a female perspective, challenging the common belief that hyper-masculine traits are most appealing. It discusses how women are drawn to a balance of masculine and feminine features, with a focus on traits like bold eyebrows and heavy stubble. The video highlights the importance of understanding the 'female gaze' and the 'masculinity trade-off hypothesis,' which suggests that women prefer men who are strong but not overly intimidating. Ultimately, it emphasizes that being 'handsome' is more complex than just being 'manly,' and balance is key.

Takeaways

• 😀 Women are often attracted to facial aesthetics that aren't traditionally considered masculine, such as smooth skin, full cheeks, and arched brows.
• 😀 The concept of 'failure of cross-sex mind reading' explains why men struggle to understand what women find attractive in men, especially when they perceive femininity as unattractive.
• 😀 Many modern heartthrobs like Jacob Elordi and Austin Butler don't fit the hyper-masculine mold but are still extremely attractive to women.
• 😀 Some manly traits, like a bushy beard or large muscles, may actually reduce a man's appeal to women, as attractiveness involves more complexity than just masculinity.
• 😀 Bold, thick, low-set eyebrows are attractive to women, even though they are traditionally considered a masculine feature.
• 😀 Baldness is often perceived as a more masculine trait but tends to be less attractive to women compared to having hair, except in cases where the man has specific facial aesthetics that suit the bald look.
• 😀 Men often overestimate the appeal of being manly or having masculine features, such as a shaved head, which may not necessarily make them more attractive.
• 😀 Facial masculinity and beardedness follow a balancing act; too much masculinity or facial hair may turn women off, while a moderate amount of both tends to be more attractive.
• 😀 There is a 'Goldilocks Zone' for facial hair and masculinity, where moderate amounts of both are most appealing to women, while extremes in either direction tend to be less attractive.
• 😀 The 'masculinity trade-off hypothesis' suggests that women prefer men who are neither overly masculine nor overly feminine, seeking a balance between the two for evolutionary and practical reasons.

Q & A

Why did men initially struggle to understand why Kim Nam Jun (RM) was considered more attractive than Henry Cavill?

Many men found it difficult to understand how RM, who has more feminine features, could be considered more attractive than Henry Cavill, who is traditionally seen as masculine. The men perceived RM's smooth skin, full cheeks, and use of makeup as feminine, leading them to struggle with the idea that these traits could be seen as attractive by women.

What does the 'failure of cross-sex mind reading' refer to in the context of the script?

The 'failure of cross-sex mind reading' refers to the difficulty some men have in understanding how women find certain traits attractive. Men may fail to recognize that women can be attracted to features that don't align with traditional masculine ideals.

How does the perception of 'manliness' differ between men and women when evaluating attractiveness?

While men often equate 'manliness' with traits like a bushy beard, large muscles, or rugged features, women find attractiveness in a broader range of traits. Many women prefer more balanced features, and being too 'manly' can be off-putting. Women are often more drawn to softer or more balanced aesthetics.

What facial trait is considered manly and attractive to women, as discussed in the script?

Thick, bold, low-set eyebrows are considered manly and attractive to women. These eyebrows are perceived as a masculine trait, but they are also generally found to enhance attractiveness in both men and women.

Why do women tend to prefer men with hair over those who are bald?

Research shows that women generally prefer men with hair over bald men, even when the bald look might suit a man. This preference suggests that women often see hair as an attractive feature, and men may overrate how appealing a shaved head looks compared to hair.

What is the Masculinity Trade-Off Hypothesis, and how does it explain women's preferences for male attractiveness?

The Masculinity Trade-Off Hypothesis suggests that women prefer men who are neither too masculine nor too feminine. Men who are excessively masculine might appear threatening, while those who are overly feminine might seem weak. Women seek a balance where a man appears strong but not intimidating.

How does the level of masculinity or femininity in a man's features affect his attractiveness to women?

Women tend to prefer men whose features are neither too masculine nor too feminine. Extreme masculinity, such as having an overly masculine face or excessive facial hair, can be less attractive. Conversely, overly feminine features might also be a turn-off. The most attractive men often have a balanced blend of masculine and feminine traits.

What role does facial hair play in male attractiveness, according to the script?

Facial hair can be attractive to women, but it needs to be balanced. Heavy stubble is considered most attractive, while a full beard can sometimes be too much. Clean-shaven faces might not be appealing on hyper-feminine men, suggesting that facial hair can help balance femininity.

How do muscle tone and body physique affect male attractiveness from a female perspective?

While muscular men are often considered more attractive, the average woman tends to prefer a physique that isn't too muscular or too scrawny. Men with a physique like Jacob Elordi's, which is moderately toned, are generally seen as more appealing compared to those with extremely muscular bodies.

What can men do to enhance their attractiveness based on the findings discussed in the script?

Men can enhance their attractiveness by focusing on features that align with women's preferences for balance. This includes paying attention to traits like eyebrow shape, maintaining hair, avoiding excessive masculinity or femininity, and opting for moderate body tone rather than extreme muscularity.