Understanding Feelings for Middle School Students : Tips for Self-Awareness & Emotional Control

Child Mind Institute
13 Apr 202305:03

Summary

TLDRThe video script by comedian Hari Kondabolu delves into the complexities of human emotions, particularly in middle school students. It explores the range of feelings from happiness and excitement to anger, guilt, and sadness, often experienced concurrently. The script emphasizes the importance of recognizing and understanding these emotions, both physically and mentally, and suggests techniques like deep breathing and journaling to cope with them. It highlights the goal of developing a life where one can navigate a broad spectrum of emotions, fostering deeper relationships and self-awareness.

Takeaways

  • 🧠 Emotions are complex and can be confusing, yet they are an integral part of the human experience.
  • 📚 Middle school students face increased pressure and a variety of intense emotions, including anger, sadness, and anxiety.
  • 😢 Feelings of sadness can be compounded by past experiences and other emotions, leading to overwhelming emotional states.
  • 😡 Emotions can be mixed, such as feeling both anger and happiness in response to the same situation.
  • 🏫 School-related stressors, like academic performance and social dynamics, are significant sources of emotional distress for students.
  • 🤯 Emotions can manifest physically, with symptoms like heart palpitations or chest pain, indicating a strong internal response.
  • 💪 Recognizing and acknowledging emotions is the first step in managing them, which can involve deep breathing and self-observation.
  • 📝 Writing down emotions can be a therapeutic way to process and express feelings, aiding in self-understanding and communication.
  • 🗣️ Talking to someone about emotions can provide relief and clarity, contributing to a sense of emotional release.
  • 🔍 Labeling emotions helps in understanding their intensity and impact, which is crucial for emotional regulation.
  • 🤝 Sharing emotions with others fosters deeper relationships and can lead to improved emotional health and well-being.

Q & A

  • What is the main theme of the video script?

    -The main theme of the video script is the exploration of emotions experienced by middle school students and how they navigate through these feelings in their daily lives.

  • Who is the speaker in the video script?

    -The speaker in the video script is Hari Kondabolu, a comedian, actor, and human being who discusses emotions and their impact on life.

  • What does the speaker suggest as the first step when experiencing strong emotions?

    -The speaker suggests taking a deep breath and observing what's happening in your body as the first step when experiencing strong emotions.

  • What is the role of physical sensations in understanding our emotions?

    -Physical sensations serve as indicators of our emotional state, often providing us with information about how we're feeling before our conscious mind fully registers the emotion.

  • How does the speaker describe the experience of feeling a mix of emotions?

    -The speaker describes the experience of feeling a mix of emotions as complex and sometimes confusing, where one might feel anger and happiness simultaneously or happiness coupled with nervousness.

  • What is the significance of labeling emotions according to the speaker?

    -Labeling emotions is significant as it helps individuals understand what they are feeling, the intensity of the emotion, and communicate these feelings to others, which can lead to deeper relationships.

  • How does the speaker relate the physical manifestation of emotions to our understanding of them?

    -The speaker relates the physical manifestation of emotions to our understanding by pointing out that our bodies often react before our minds do, and recognizing these physical signs can help us identify and process our emotions.

  • What are some of the emotions mentioned by the students in the script?

    -Some of the emotions mentioned by the students in the script include happiness, anxiety, shame, sadness, anger, guilt, and a mix of happiness and anger.

  • What is the speaker's view on the purpose of emotions?

    -The speaker views emotions as communicators of useful information to ourselves and others, suggesting that they serve a purpose in helping us understand and navigate our internal and social worlds.

  • How does the speaker address the issue of feeling overwhelmed by emotions?

    -The speaker addresses the issue of feeling overwhelmed by suggesting that one should observe and label the emotions, assess the intensity, and consider sharing these feelings with others to gain clarity and support.

  • What advice does the speaker give for dealing with intense feelings?

    -The speaker advises to take a deep breath, observe the physical sensations, label the emotions, assess their intensity, and consider writing them down or sharing them with someone as a way to process and deal with intense feelings.

Outlines

00:00

🧡 Understanding Emotions in Middle School

The video script begins with Hari Kondabolu, a comedian and actor, addressing middle school students as the future of America. He discusses the complexity and significance of emotions, which he describes as part of the human experience that can be both wonderful and confusing. The script captures various students sharing their experiences with intense feelings, such as pressure, sadness, anger, and anxiety, which are common in middle school due to academic and social challenges. It also touches on the idea that emotions can be mixed and intense, and that they can manifest physically, indicating the importance of recognizing and understanding these emotions.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Emotion

Emotion refers to the complex psychological state that involves a mix of feelings, thoughts, and physiological changes in response to a specific event, object, or thought. In the video's theme, emotions are central to understanding the human experience, as they are depicted as both wonderful and confusing. Examples from the script include feelings of happiness, anger, sadness, and anxiety, which are all part of the emotional spectrum that middle school students navigate.

💡Middle School

Middle school is a stage of education that typically serves students in the 6th through 8th grades. It is a transitional period between elementary school and high school, often marked by increased academic pressure and social challenges. In the script, middle school is portrayed as a time of heightened emotions and pressure, with students experiencing a range of feelings from happiness to anger and sadness.

💡Pressure

Pressure in this context refers to the stress or strain felt by an individual, often due to societal or personal expectations. The video script highlights the pressure middle school students face to achieve good grades for college admission, which contributes to their emotional experiences and the need to manage these feelings.

💡Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. While not explicitly mentioned in the script, the concept of empathy is implied through the discussion of emotions and the importance of understanding one's own feelings to build deeper relationships with others.

💡Overwhelm

Overwhelm is a state of being excessively burdened or overcome by a feeling or situation. In the video, students describe feeling overwhelmed by a mix of emotions, such as sadness and anger, which can be challenging to express and manage.

💡Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the conscious knowledge of one's own character, feelings, motives, and desires. The script emphasizes the importance of self-awareness in recognizing and understanding one's emotions, as seen when students describe how they identify and label their feelings, such as anger or sadness.

💡Expression

Expression refers to the act of conveying thoughts, feelings, or ideas in a clear and effective manner. The video script discusses the difficulty some students have in expressing their complex emotions, and how finding ways to express these feelings can be therapeutic and clarifying.

💡Anxiety

Anxiety is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. In the script, students mention feeling anxious, particularly in situations like being called on in class or taking on leadership roles in school clubs.

💡Guilt

Guilt is a complex emotion that involves a sense of responsibility or regret for some perceived fault or wrong action. The script includes an example of a student feeling guilty for losing a watch, illustrating how guilt can be a component of the emotional landscape in middle school students' lives.

💡Coping Mechanisms

Coping mechanisms are strategies or behaviors used to manage stress or negative emotions. The video script suggests taking a deep breath and observing physical sensations as a first step in coping with overwhelming emotions, highlighting the importance of finding healthy ways to deal with feelings.

💡Self-Reflection

Self-reflection is the process of thinking deeply about one's experiences, feelings, and beliefs. The script encourages self-reflection as a way to better understand emotions, as students are shown considering their feelings and how they affect them, such as when a student writes down their emotions to process them.

💡Physical Sensations

Physical sensations are the bodily experiences that accompany emotions, such as a racing heart or tense muscles. The video script describes how students experience physical sensations like a 'whirlwind' in the brain or a 'cramping' in the chest when they feel certain emotions, indicating the close link between emotional and physical states.

Highlights

A feeling to me is something kind of like, in our mind that goes through our heart.

Emotions are one of the most wonderful, confusing, and challenging aspects of being a person.

Why do we have emotions, and what are we supposed to do when we feel them?

Middle school is more like pressure, have to get good grades in order to get to a good college.

The worst feeling that I felt actually is in school, when you're trying not to cry.

Sometimes I cry when I'm like, when I don't understand something.

I feel all the emotions.

Feeling that I have the most is sadness. Behind that sadness then there's more sadness.

We actually did a funeral with my grandma. It's like we upset. It's like really sad.

When we feel emotions, we can often be feeling a mix of more than one.

There's times where I can feel like happy and excited, for most things, but then inside I'm like nervous.

So, why do we have these feelings? As much as they can be annoying or overwhelming, they communicate useful information.

Often our bodies know how we're feeling, way before we understand it.

These physical sensations can be a lot, but when this happens a good first step, is to take a deep breath, and just observe what's happening in your body.

If you just talk to someone, it just like makes it feel like an empty canvas.

Transcripts

play00:00

- I don't know.

play00:01

A feeling to me is something kind of like

play00:06

in our mind that goes through our heart.

play00:09

(soft music)

play00:16

- Hello, middle school students, AKA, the future of America.

play00:19

My name is Hari Kondabolu.

play00:21

I'm a comedian, an actor, and unfortunately at times

play00:25

a human being who feels all kinds of emotions

play00:28

that I constantly need to work through.

play00:31

Emotions are one of the most wonderful, confusing,

play00:33

and challenging aspects of being a person.

play00:36

What are they exactly?

play00:37

Why do we have them

play00:39

and what are we supposed to do when we feel them?

play00:41

And when it comes to intense feelings

play00:43

it turns out I am not alone.

play00:47

- Elementary school is like all fun games

play00:50

Christmas parties, Halloween parties, stuff like that.

play00:54

But middle school is more like pressure.

play00:56

Have to get good grades in order to get to a good college.

play01:00

It's really just like a lot of pressure now

play01:02

and more emotions, definitely mad, anger, sadness sometimes.

play01:07

The worst feeling that I felt actually is in school

play01:09

when you're trying not to cry.

play01:11

- Sometimes I cry when I'm like

play01:14

when I don't understand something.

play01:17

So that's like, that like gives you an idea

play01:19

of how sensitive I am.

play01:22

- I feel all the emotions.

play01:24

- There's some happiness.

play01:25

- Anxious.

play01:26

- Shame.

play01:28

- How do you explain overwhelm?

play01:30

- Feeling that I have the most is sadness.

play01:33

Behind that sadness then there's more sadness,

play01:36

pushing that even more from all these other things

play01:39

that are coming back from the past.

play01:40

- I'm super upset

play01:42

because we actually did a funeral with my grandma.

play01:45

It's like we upset.

play01:47

It's like really sad.

play01:52

- When we feel emotions

play01:53

we can often be feeling a mix of more than one.

play01:57

- I feel anger and happiness.

play01:59

That one's weird.

play02:00

Like you're angry at your sister

play02:01

and you see her fail and you're like.

play02:04

- There's times where I can feel like happy and excited

play02:08

for most things, but then inside I'm like nervous.

play02:12

- It was so many mix of emotions I couldn't express it.

play02:16

- I'm in like clubs, like some clubs at my school.

play02:19

So like I get nervous

play02:20

'cause I'm like one of the leaders sort of.

play02:23

So I get nervous on how to be in charge

play02:27

but I'm excited 'cause I am in charge.

play02:29

- I felt angry and guilty at myself because I'm like

play02:32

why did you lose that watch?

play02:34

It was on you the whole time.

play02:36

It was securely strapped on you.

play02:39

How did you lose that?

play02:45

- So, why do we have these feelings?

play02:48

As much as they can be annoying or overwhelming

play02:50

they communicate useful information

play02:52

to ourselves and everybody around us.

play02:55

Often our bodies know how we're feeling

play02:58

way before we understand it.

play03:00

- When I'm angry, I'm like vigorously

play03:04

doing these hand motions.

play03:06

- Feel it in my chest, through my brain.

play03:07

My brain would just, every time that would happen

play03:09

my brain would just go in a whirlwind.

play03:11

- My heart and my chest starts like cramping up,

play03:14

- Like, buh boom, buh boom, buh boom.

play03:16

- When the teacher calls on me,

play03:18

it kind of like my heart stops

play03:20

and then it goes down all the way down to my legs.

play03:25

- These physical sensations can be a lot,

play03:27

but when this happens a good first step

play03:30

is to take a deep breath

play03:32

and just observe what's happening in your body.

play03:35

Then label the emotions or multiple emotions

play03:38

that are happening.

play03:39

Maybe notice to yourself what level of intensity it is.

play03:42

On a scale of 1 to 10.

play03:44

- Think I'm fairly good

play03:46

at understanding my emotions.

play03:47

When I'm crying for no reason that's a big telltale.

play03:51

- I did write down that sometimes

play03:53

I don't like being called on without raising my hand.

play03:56

- But writing it down gets it out of you.

play03:59

You've already emptied it and just sharing it with somebody.

play04:02

So that definitely helped me out.

play04:05

- If you just talk to someone

play04:06

it just like makes it feel like an empty canvas.

play04:09

- When I was younger, like fifth and sixth grade, I just,

play04:13

I hated myself like a lot.

play04:14

Like just looking at myself in the mirror

play04:15

my like I had a lot of acne then as well.

play04:17

I was overweight, I was short.

play04:20

I just didn't like my appearance at all.

play04:21

I didn't want to like meet up with my friends

play04:23

or talk to people or like girls or anything because I dunno,

play04:26

I just didn't like how I looked.

play04:27

I always wore like baggy clothes and things

play04:29

and I still kind of do now, but I'm better about it.

play04:33

- After you label your emotion,

play04:34

you might still be feeling it

play04:36

but by labeling it for yourself

play04:38

you can help understand what might be going on

play04:41

and then you can explain your emotion to other people

play04:43

and then have even deeper relationships with them.

play04:46

Ideally, the goal is to have a life where you feel

play04:49

a broad range of emotions,

play04:51

understand what they are, how they're affecting you,

play04:54

and learn how to deal with them.

play04:56

(soft music)

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Related Tags
EmotionsMiddle SchoolSelf-ReflectionCoping StrategiesYouth Mental HealthEmotional IntelligencePersonal GrowthSocial PressureSelf-ExpressionHari KondaboluEmotional Well-being