Be Easy to Be With BUT Hard to Get.

Summary

In this intimate video, the creator candidly discusses various aspects of life, from parenting to self-love and relationships, all while her daughter naps in the car. She shares how becoming a parent has deepened her respect and connection with her husband and emphasizes the importance of self-care for mothers. The video also touches on maintaining feminine energy post-children, the challenges of finding reliable help, and the dynamics of attraction in relationships. Sponsored by BetterHelp, the creator highlights the benefits of online therapy for those facing life's uncertainties, including the fear of motherhood and relationship issues.

Takeaways

• 👨‍👧 Parenting has a profound impact on relationships, often leading to a deeper respect and appreciation for one's partner as a parent.
• 🤔 The concept of 'black cat energy' refers to being independent and desirable, which can coexist with motherhood and femininity.
• 💕 Self-love can manifest in various forms throughout life, such as prioritizing oneself and one's ambitions, especially in the context of work and personal growth.
• 👶 Having children can lead to personal transformation, including increased career success and self-awareness, contrary to societal fears of losing oneself.
• 🏠 The desire for a better living situation can be motivated by redirecting one's ambitions and celebrating achievements, making the partner feel valued and appreciated.
• 📚 The speaker believes in astrology as it relates to astronomy and planetary movements, but not in the generalizations found in horoscopes.
• 👫 Men test women to ascertain their value and boundaries, seeking a partner who is 'hard to get' as it signifies a sense of achievement.
• 💌 To convey the seriousness of a situation to a partner, actions speak louder than words; disengagement and lack of reaction can be more impactful than lengthy messages.
• 🏡 Breaking the cycle of generational poverty involves leveraging one's strengths, possibly through content creation or teaching, and adopting an abundant mindset.
• 👩‍❤️‍👨 The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-love and authenticity in romantic relationships, suggesting that being a 'golden retriever' or chaser is unattractive.
• 👀 The fear of motherhood is a common concern, but overcoming it requires personal experience, as societal worries often don't reflect the reality of parenthood.

Q & A

How has parenting impacted the speaker's relationship with her husband?

Parenting has deepened the speaker's respect and appreciation for her husband. She admires his fatherly qualities and feels healed from her own childhood experiences without a father figure. However, it has also led to less time together as they both focus on raising their children.

What is the speaker's current form of self-love?

The speaker's current form of self-love is prioritizing herself in her work, particularly in writing her book and doing her job. It's not about indulgent activities like bubble baths or manicures, but about putting herself first in her professional pursuits.

What does the speaker mean by 'black cat energy'?

The 'black cat energy' refers to a woman being independent and desirable, akin to being chased by a man. The speaker argues that having children doesn't diminish one's feminine energy or desirability, and one can still embody the essence of a 'black cat' even after becoming a mother.

How long did the speaker date her husband before getting married?

The speaker met her husband in 2012 and got engaged in 2013, indicating a relatively short period of dating before deciding to marry.

What challenges does the speaker face in finding help around the house?

The speaker finds it difficult to find someone she trusts with her children and who is also available and reliable. She emphasizes the importance of finding someone of sound mind and good character, which she finds more challenging than finding a romantic partner.

What advice does the speaker give for maintaining a woman's attractiveness when she likes a man?

The speaker advises women to avoid behaving like a 'golden retriever', or being overly eager and chasing after a man, as it can be unattractive. Instead, she suggests maintaining 'black cat energy', being hard to get but easy to be around, which she believes is more appealing to men.

How does the speaker feel about her body after having children?

Contrary to her pre-motherhood worries, the speaker likes her body more now than before. She feels more connected and appreciative of her body post-pregnancy.

What is the speaker's perspective on career success post-motherhood?

The speaker has experienced more career success after becoming a mother. She attributes this to having more to say and a grounded energy, as well as being motivated by the need to provide for her children.

What is the speaker's view on BetterHelp and its role in sponsoring her content?

The speaker is grateful to BetterHelp for sponsoring her content, as it allows her to create more material and support her family. She appreciates BetterHelp's platform for its convenience and the ease of switching therapists if needed.

How does the speaker suggest getting someone to understand that it's their last chance with you?

The speaker recommends showing through actions rather than words. She suggests disengaging, not giving energy or reactions to the person's behavior, and making them feel that they will lose you if they continue with their actions.

What advice does the speaker offer for dealing with a man who teases you like a brother?

The speaker advises trying to genuinely show hurt feelings if the teasing continues after attempts to ignore or politely ask for it to stop. She suggests expressing genuine upset without yelling, to make the person aware of the impact of their words.

How can a person motivate their spouse to have more ambition and desire for life achievements?

The speaker suggests redirecting the spouse's ambitions towards shared goals, making them feel appreciated for what they've already achieved, and subtly inspiring them by making them think it's their idea to pursue more.

What is the speaker's stance on astrology?

The speaker believes in the science behind astronomy and planetary movements but does not believe in the personalized predictions found in newspapers or horoscopes, especially considering the complexities of tropical and sidereal signs.

How does the speaker define femininity and its power?

The speaker defines femininity as a source of power that goes beyond traditional 9-to-5 jobs or becoming a lawyer. She believes in the ability of women to create and monetize their skills, especially through content creation and teaching.

What advice does the speaker give for dealing with codependency and learning to love spending time alone?

The speaker recommends her own book, 'The New Rules', as a resource for learning to fall in love with oneself. She suggests treating oneself as one would treat a loved one or a child, which can be a pivotal and life-changing approach.

Why do men test women according to the speaker?

Men test women to determine their value and boundaries. The speaker believes that men want a valuable partner and testing is a way for them to feel like winners in life, having acquired the best they could get.

How can a single mother from a family with a history of poverty build sustainable wealth?

The speaker suggests leveraging one's femininity and talents to create content and offer courses or teaching. She also emphasizes the importance of breaking down barriers and adopting an abundant mindset, emulating the behaviors of wealthy individuals.