5a . The Fifth Word

Summary

This lecture explores the fifth and sixth commandments, focusing on the transition from commands centered on worshiping God to those about relationships with others. It discusses the debate on whether honoring parents is part of loving God or loving neighbors, emphasizing the importance of honoring parents as a reflection of honoring God. The lecture delves into the differences between the commandments in Exodus and Deuteronomy, the significance of structure, and the enduring relevance of honoring parents throughout life, even in challenging circumstances.

Takeaways

• 📜 The fifth and sixth commandments represent a shift in focus from loving God to loving one's neighbors, emphasizing the importance of relationships within the community.
• 🔗 The fifth commandment, 'Honor your father and mother,' can be seen as a hinge point that connects the role of God in our lives to the role of parents, highlighting the significance of respecting authority figures.
• ✡ The structure of the Ten Commandments, possibly divided between two tablets, suggests a deeper meaning and organization, with the first four focusing on love for God and the latter six on love for neighbor.
• 📚 The commandments are memorable and designed for memorization, with a clear structure that invites detailed thought and consideration of their implications in daily life.
• 👪 The concept of 'honor' in the fifth commandment involves ascribing proper respect and dignity to one's parents, acknowledging their role in giving and sustaining life.
• 🌱 Honoring parents is not limited to childhood obedience but extends into adulthood, requiring ongoing care, respect, and recognition of their importance in one's life.
• 🏡 The promise associated with honoring one's parents is that of a long and prosperous life in the land God has given, suggesting a causal relationship between honoring parents and receiving God's blessings.
• 🤔 The script raises questions about interpreting the promise of a long life as either a direct promise from God or a general proverb, acknowledging the complexities of life's circumstances.
• 👉 Biblical examples illustrate the importance of honoring parents, such as the story of Noah and his sons, and the commandment's role in maintaining social and moral order.
• 📖 The New Testament reinforces the importance of honoring parents, as seen in Ephesians 6, where it is called the first commandment with a promise, and in Jesus' teachings in Mark 7.
• 💡 The enduring relevance of honoring parents is emphasized, suggesting that it is a holy and lifelong duty that is appropriate to every stage of life, even in the face of difficult family dynamics.

Q & A

What is the significance of the fifth and sixth commandments in the context of the Ten Commandments?

The fifth and sixth commandments represent a shift in focus for the worshiper. While the first four commandments focus directly on the Lord and things He deems holy, these two commandments begin to address the worshiper's relationship with others, specifically parents and the community, emphasizing the importance of honoring one's parents and not killing or murdering.

How does Baker's interpretation of the Ten Commandments suggest a structural division?

Baker suggests that the fifth commandment, 'Honor your father and mother,' belongs with the first four commands that focus on loving the Lord. The sixth and following commands would then be on another tablet, focusing on the worshiper's relationship with others. This interpretation implies a structural division that aligns with the two great commandments Jesus gives: loving God and loving one's neighbor.

What is the role of parents in the context of the fifth commandment?

The role of parents in the fifth commandment is indicative of the kind of role that God plays in our lives. They are the ones who give life and sustain us, and thus, honoring them reflects the honor and respect we should give to God as the ultimate authority and sustainer.

How does the structure of the Ten Commandments contribute to their memorization and understanding?

The structure of the Ten Commandments, being given in a list of 10, makes it easier to memorize. This structure invites individuals to think more carefully and specifically about each command, aiding in the commitment of these principles to memory and encouraging a detailed consideration of what each command calls us to do.

What is the difference between the way the fifth commandment is presented in Exodus 20 and Deuteronomy 5?

In Exodus 20:12, the commandment is to 'honor your father and mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.' In Deuteronomy 5:16, it is 'honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may go well with you in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.' The difference lies in the addition of 'as the Lord your God commanded you' and 'that it may go well with you,' emphasizing the command's source and the promise of well-being.

What does the word 'lama' signify in the context of the fifth commandment?

The word 'lama' in the context of the fifth commandment signifies a causal relationship. It clarifies that the long life in the land God is giving is contingent upon honoring one's father and mother.

How does the concept of 'honor' in the fifth commandment relate to the idea of 'glory' or 'kavod'?

The concept of 'honor' in the fifth commandment, derived from the Hebrew word 'kavod,' relates to the idea of 'glory' or 'weightiness.' It implies ascribing the proper weight or dignity to one's parents, recognizing their role in giving life and providing for the child.

What are some ways in which one can honor their parents according to the script?

One can honor their parents by ascribing dignity and respect to their role, caring for them as they age, maintaining contact and making oneself and one's children available to them, and showing respect even in disagreements.

How does the script interpret the promise of a long life in the land for those who honor their parents?

The script interprets the promise of a long life as both a general rule (proverb) and a specific promise from God. It suggests that while there are exceptions due to the effects of sin or God's mysterious purposes, honoring one's parents is closely associated with flourishing and a long life in God's kingdom.

What are some biblical examples given in the script that illustrate the importance of honoring one's parents?

The script provides examples such as the story of Noah and his son Ham in Genesis 9, where Ham dishonors his father and incurs a curse, and the example of a stubborn and rebellious son in Deuteronomy 21 who is put to death for his disrespect.

How does the New Testament view the commandment to honor one's parents?

The New Testament, specifically Ephesians 6 and Mark 7, reinforces the importance of honoring one's parents. In Ephesians 6, it is called the first commandment with a promise, while Mark 7 criticizes those who use religious traditions to avoid caring for their parents, thus dishonoring them.

What is the enduring relevance of the commandment to honor one's parents in the script's perspective?

The enduring relevance of the commandment is that it is a holy thing to respect and care for one's parents at every stage of life. This includes maintaining contact, caring for them as they age, and showing respect even in disagreements. The script emphasizes that this duty does not go away, even in difficult circumstances.

How should one approach honoring parents who were not good or caused harm?

The script suggests that even in cases of bad parents, the duty to honor them has not gone away. It becomes more burdensome but still requires seeking ways to honor them as much as possible, without compromising safety or enabling sinful behavior.

Outlines

00:00

📜 Shift in Focus within the Ten Commandments

In this week's lesson, we explore the fifth and sixth commandments, highlighting a shift in focus for worshipers. The discussion centers around the structure of the Ten Commandments, noting that the first four commandments emphasize direct devotion to God. The fifth commandment, honoring one's parents, serves as a hinge between loving God and loving one's neighbor, symbolizing both divine and parental authority.

05:01

📝 The Importance of Structure and Memorization

The video emphasizes the significance of the structure within the Ten Commandments, particularly the benefit of having ten specific commands, which aids in memorization. This structure encourages careful contemplation of each command and its call to holiness, making it easier for individuals to internalize and live by these principles.

10:03

👪 The Fifth Commandment: Honoring Parents

Focusing on the fifth commandment, the discussion compares the versions in Exodus and Deuteronomy, noting subtle differences. The command to honor one's parents is tied to the promise of a long and prosperous life in the land God provides. This honor involves ascribing proper respect and dignity to parents, acknowledging their role in giving life and providing for their children, and ensuring care for them as they age.

15:03

🤝 Respect and Care in Parent-Child Relationships

This section highlights the importance of maintaining respect towards parents, even in disagreements. The command to honor parents extends beyond childhood and involves continuous respect and care throughout one's life. The relationship is seen as foundational, with proper honor leading to a blessed and prosperous life.

20:04

📖 Biblical Examples of Honoring Parents

Various biblical examples illustrate the significance of honoring parents, such as Noah's sons covering his shame and the severe consequences for a rebellious son in Deuteronomy. Jesus and Paul also reiterate the importance of this commandment, emphasizing its foundational role in maintaining respect for authority and fostering a godly community.

25:07

🏡 Enduring Relevance of Honoring Parents

The final section addresses the enduring relevance of honoring parents, emphasizing that it remains a holy duty throughout life. Practical ways to honor parents include maintaining contact, caring for them as they age, and respecting them despite disagreements. The discussion also acknowledges the challenges of honoring parents in difficult circumstances, urging a balance between honor and wisdom.

Keywords

💡Worship

Worship in the context of the video refers to the act of showing reverence and adoration for a deity, specifically God in the Judeo-Christian tradition. The theme of worship is central as it discusses the shift in focus from loving God to loving one's neighbor, which is a key component of the Ten Commandments. Worship is exemplified in the commandments that demand devotion and obedience to God's will.

💡Ten Commandments

The Ten Commandments are a set of biblical principles relating to ethics and worship, given by God to the Israelites in the Old Testament. In the video, they are discussed in terms of their structure and the shift in focus they represent, moving from commands directly addressing the worship of God to those concerning relationships with others, including parents and neighbors.

💡Honor

Honor, in the script, is used to describe the respect and dignity owed to one's parents as outlined in the fifth commandment. It is a central theme of the video, which explores the idea of honoring parents not just in terms of obedience but also in providing care and maintaining a relationship with them throughout life.

💡Fifth Commandment

The Fifth Commandment, 'Honor your father and your mother,' is a focal point in the video. It is discussed in terms of its placement within the Ten Commandments and its significance as a hinge point between the love of God and the love of one's neighbor. The script delves into the implications of this commandment for both children and parents.

💡Parental Authority

Parental Authority is the concept of the role and power parents have over their children, as given by God. The video discusses how honoring parents is reflective of recognizing the authority God has placed them in. It is tied to the idea that parents are responsible for nurturing and guiding their children in accordance with God's will.

💡Covenant

Covenant in the script refers to the agreement or bond between God and His people, as well as the obligations and blessings associated with it. The concept is used to explain the conditional nature of the blessings and curses tied to obedience or disobedience to God's commandments, including the commandment to honor one's parents.

💡Sabbath

The Sabbath is a day of rest and worship, and it is mentioned in the video as one of the commandments that emphasize the sanctity of time dedicated to God. It serves as a point of comparison to the commandment about honoring parents, which also has a promise attached to it, indicating the importance of both in the context of God's commandments.

💡Love Thy Neighbor

Love Thy Neighbor is a principle derived from the second great commandment given by Jesus, which is connected to the discussion of the Ten Commandments in the video. It represents the shift from commands focused on the worship of God to those addressing interpersonal relationships and ethical conduct towards others.

💡Holiness

Holiness in the video refers to the state of being set apart for God and living in accordance with His will. It is discussed in relation to how the Ten Commandments call for a holy life, both in one's relationship with God and with others. The concept of holiness is integral to understanding the moral and spiritual implications of the commandments.

💡Proverbs

Proverbs in the script are general rules or principles that are meant to guide behavior and thought. They are mentioned when discussing the nature of the promise associated with honoring one's parents. The video explores whether the promise is a specific guarantee from God or a general principle that aligns with the wisdom of the Proverbs.

💡Ephesians

Ephesians is a book of the New Testament where the Apostle Paul writes about various Christian doctrines and instructions. In the video, Ephesians 6 is specifically mentioned as it includes the commandment to honor one's father and mother, reinforcing the importance of this principle in Christian teaching.

Highlights

The fifth and sixth commandments represent a shift in the worshiper's focus, emphasizing the role of parents as indicative of God's role in our lives.

The first four commandments focus on the love and reverence for God, while the fifth commandment acts as a hinge point between honoring God and relating to others.

The structure of the Ten Commandments, with ten words, makes them memorable and invites detailed consideration of each command.

The fifth commandment, 'Honor your father and mother,' is seen as the first commandment with a promise, linking honor to a long and prosperous life in the land God gives.

The concept of 'honor' in the fifth commandment involves ascribing proper weight and dignity to one's parents, reflecting their role in giving and sustaining life.

Honoring parents can involve caring for them as they age, maintaining their dignity, and respecting them even in disagreements.

The land that God is giving is not to be entered and used without regard for God's commandments, emphasizing our role as stewards in God's kingdom.

The structure of the Ten Commandments may provide a clue to the larger structure of the book of Deuteronomy, although this is not a tight structure.

The promise of a long life for honoring parents can be seen as a proverb, indicating a general rule rather than a guaranteed outcome.

The command to honor parents is closely associated with how one honors God, as parents' roles in our lives parallel God's role.

Biblical examples from Genesis and Deuteronomy highlight the seriousness of not honoring one's parents, with severe consequences.

Jesus criticizes religious leaders for rejecting the command to honor parents in favor of their own traditions, showing the importance of honoring parents over religious practices.

Paul in Ephesians emphasizes the command to honor parents as the first with a promise, tying it to the broader context of obeying God's authority.

The enduring relevance of honoring parents includes maintaining contact, caring for them in old age, and respecting them despite disagreements.

The duty to honor parents does not disappear even in cases of bad parenting, requiring a careful balance between honor and wisdom.

Transcripts

welcome to week five uh this week we're

going to be looking at the fifth and

sixth commands

um structurally these these two commands

are especially with the fifth command

represent a shift in the worshiper's

focus as we look at the ten commandments

as you've already read about in baker's

book for example that

there's some discussion about you know

on what two tablets were specific

commands written or something like that

and um

you know baker for example thinks that

um the the fifth command honor your

father and mother properly belongs with

the first four commands that you love

the lord your god with all your heart

soul mind and strength in these various

ways

and the sixth and following commands

would be on another tablet so

you know to some extent um there's

there's not a whole lot of difference

between these two ideas we'll talk about

structure in just a moment but

um the first four commands clearly do um

focus directly on the lord and things

that he has commanded things that he

would deem holy

you know we we don't worship other gods

there's no images to be made

one does not bear the name of the lord

in vain and then the sabbath day

marking it or living in it as a holy day

in order to worship the lord properly to

give proper deference and holiness to

who god is

um so this is uh many will say this is

how the the first command that jesus

gives is summarized you shall love the

lord your god with all your heart soul

mind and strength commands one through

four and then others will say then

commands five through ten

properly locate the second great

commandment that jesus gives that you

shall love your neighbors yourself and

again there's some discussion about

whether that fifth command properly

belongs with loving the lord your god

with all your hearts almighty strength

or loving your neighbor as yourself

i think a case can be made for both um i

i think there's there's good words that

are said in either direction

where the idea of the fifth commandment

being this um

you know an emphasis on honoring god it

would have to do with the role of mother

and father

in some sense

uh being indicative of the kind of role

that god plays in our lives that he is

the one that gives life and he is the

one that sustains us and so we can

understand this command to honor father

and mother in that way

i think in in many ways this fifth

commandment really is a hinge point

either way it does seem to be kind of a

go-between or mediating position between

the kind of

role or authority that god has over our

lives and the same kind of role that

parents have over their children but

but really there is a distinct

difference obviously that's being made

between

a human being and the authority that

they would have over their children and

the kind of authority that god has over

us so i just think of it as a as a hinge

point um it's still emphasizing that we

honor the lord

but it is also properly pointing us to

how it is we relate to one another so

yes we relate to god um by loving him

wholeheartedly but we also relate to

others and these

last five and or six commands focus on

how it is we relate to one another in

light of

how we relate to god in the first four

commands

now there is some discussion about this

idea of structure

and the ten commandments um and and not

so much just about how they are

structured themselves but that the

structure of the ten commandments

provides a clue or a larger structure

especially in deuteronomy some will make

the case with exodus as well but

especially in deuteronomy

uh that the book of uh deuteronomy the

ten commandments in deuteronomy five

are sort of a layout then for how the

rest of the commands are are structured

in the book of deuteronomy so they'll

say you know well you know these

chapters focus on uh loving the lord

only that there's no other gods before

me these commands have to do with um

images or idols about god these commands

have to do with not bearing the lord's

name in vain

the problem is it starts to look like

quite a bit of a stretch when you try to

lay that template over the text of

deuteronomy or the structure of

deuteronomy 2

closely you start looking at these

chapters and you're like well what does

this have to do with bearing the lord's

name in vain or what do these have to do

with adultery or what do these have to

do with covetousness and things like

that

um there do seem to be some

generalizations perhaps in the book of

deuteronomy that might follow the

structure of the ten commandments but

it's it's not a really tight structure

so i'd be careful about

over emphasizing that but it does give

us a point of thinking about the idea of

structure

within the ten commandments perhaps and

even the idea that there is a structure

and that there are 10 words being given

and

a few things that we see in that one is

that certainly

having a number given a structure given

in number like 10 words

does invite someone to to memorize such

a list it makes it memorable and you're

thinking

and you've probably read this already

right you've got 10 fingers assuming

everything's worked out properly for you

you've got 10 fingers and hey there's

ten words so you're sitting there

thinking as a kid in hebrew school or

something like that okay what's the

first command what's the second command

what's the third command right and you

can just count off the commands and

memorize them and it's it's good to have

these committed to memory as you think

about the spears of life that god calls

us to holiness and loving him and loving

our neighbor

properly

in any case

this kind of structure is a call to

think more carefully

more specifically to think in detail

what do these things call us to

um it makes memorizing easier and it

makes thinking about it more likely okay

so

um

in any case as i mentioned this this

hinge point the fifth and sixth command

um does now shift

uh to direct interaction with others in

community um and we'll say towards our

parents and as we look at the sixth

command as well

of not killing or murdering um these

commands have to do with our interaction

with others in the community

um holiness in god's kingdom requires

intentionality and how we relate to him

and now as we think about how we relate

to one another we we're not here to just

do whatever we want to

and uh wait for god's stamp of approval

on it no we are god's people

um and again i'm speaking in we terms

here they were god's people we are now

god's people as well as we think about

how we relate these to our lives

so let's look at the fifth command

as we think through what these mean

the fifth command what's given in exodus

20 and deuteronomy 5 are similar but not

exact uh the fifth word the fifth

command is another one like the sabbath

day where there's there's quite a bit of

difference between the two

um and we want to look at perhaps why

that might be okay so in exodus 20 verse

12 the command is honor your father and

mother that your days may be long in the

land that the lord your god is giving

you

and then deuteronomy 5 16 honor your

father and mother

as the lord your god commanded you

there's a shift there

that your days may be long and here's

another shift and that it may go well

with you in the land that the lord your

god is giving you

okay so

with

this there's a few things i'll point out

as we look at this um so

honor your father and mother

that your days may be long in the land

that the lord your god is giving you

there's there's a word there um so that

the word is lama on um which

the only reason i'm telling you this is

because it it distinguishes or clarifies

a causal relationship here honor your

father and mother

the cause

that your days may be long in the land

that lord your god is giving you okay so

a long

length of time in the day in the land

that god is giving you is contingent

upon honoring your father and mother

um paul i'll talk about this in just a

bit more it talks about in ephesians

chapter six how this is the first

commandment with a promise right the

goddess is hinging

uh their length of days in the land upon

their honoring of father and mother okay

so le ma on this causal relationship

it's important that we that this stands

out that you recognize in english the

word that

um is doing some work there

okay again

we see here the singular you your days

may be long in the land as a result of

honoring father and mother so again

they're hearing god speaking directly to

them as individuals and something else

to notice here in the land that the lord

your god is giving you this kind of goes

back to what i said a moment ago

this is god's land in god's kingdom he

is the one who is taking them into the

land he is the one that will sustain and

bless them there based on their

faithfulness or that he will bring about

his covenant curses in in the event that

they are being unfaithful to the

covenant right this is the land that god

is giving you you don't get to go into

this land and just do whatever you want

to with it you were stewards you were my

kingdom of priests and holy nation my

image bearers going into this land you

will do in that land what i've called

you to do this is

the land god is giving to them

okay so then similar in deuteronomy 5

just a few things to point out here

um

deuteronomy 5 reiterates as the lord

your god commanded you now this might be

just because deuteronomy 5 is moses

retelling these things to the people

rather than

god speaking directly from the mountain

at sinai like he did in exodus 20. here

moses is reiterating what god has said

but it also is just a reminder in the

midst of this

god is the one who commands this this is

kind of like the land that the lord your

god is giving you god is the one who is

making this command

this particular word in deuteronomy also

does add this phrase and that it may

well go well with you and so the idea is

not just that you're staying in the land

a long time but but that your time there

is one of blessing and flourishing okay

so

what does this command mean

well the idea of honor is ascribing

the proper weight to one's father and

mother

the word here kavadh or kavod

communicates this idea of heaviness or

weightiness the the noun form kavod

is this idea that we use for glory right

so this this glory that is ascribed to

god for example or glory that may be

ascribed to another

community is communicated by this idea

of heaviness or weightiness

so to be heavy kavadh

is also the word that we use to give

glory to or give honor to so ascribing

the proper weight

to one's father and mother

and now you'll notice in this as you

think about that the people to whom god

was speaking and the people that god

that moses is speaking to in deuteronomy

5 for example this has implications for

children who are still living in the

home

but it's being spoken primarily to adult

children in other words this isn't

simply about obedience paul uses it for

obedience in ephesians 6 that's not all

it's about so it's not as though the

command to

honor one's mother and father stops the

instant you uh or an israelite

would leave the home this command

applies throughout their lives

what's going on here well one's

relationship to his or her parents is no

light thing it is a very heavy weighty

honorable kind of thing so how does one

honor parents for example

well i think one would be to

ascribe the dignity and respect that is

due to their role as a parent

right as i mentioned a bit earlier

the parent is the one who gives life and

the one who provides for

that child

as they're being brought up in the hold

in the home and then being

sent out to to start their own families

right so there's a dignity and respect

to this kind of role

they're taking this on they're giving

life they're providing for that child

they're being tasked by god as well

to bring that child up to maturity in

life you know so it's not just like hey

i gave you life and food

good luck no parents are teaching their

children they're giving of themselves

and their lives in order to be fruitful

and multiply uh to

make more image bearers of god life

provision and

bringing up to maturity in life so what

does this look like then to honor one's

parents

uh one would be to care for them

this is um particularly noteworthy as

they require your help so you think

about uh the effects of aging as your as

your parents are growing into

later life they need the help of their

children

to help care for them in the later years

of their lives

perhaps also as

parents are growing older and they lose

the spouse one or the other

your presence

for them is um an act of honoring them

for who they are as your parents you're

caring for them when they cannot care

for themselves

um this also i think might have

implications um in

that time and this will kind of get into

enduring relevance a little bit but it's

it's been noteworthy in my own life to

think about

uh your presence and time in their lives

continuing presence and time in their

lives even after you leave the home and

you think about when grandkids come into

the picture

i think it's an act of honor that you

ensure that your parents have access to

their grandkids and you as well right

that you don't necessarily just leave

home and you're gone forever now i know

there's all kinds of things we have to

consider here um we we do not live near

my parents or my wife's parents um but

um this video is actually being recorded

in the backyard of my in-laws who live

about 15 hours away

because we take it very seriously that

one act of honoring them we love being

around them anyway but

it's an act of honoring who they are

they want to see us they want to see

their grandkids so we carve out time a

couple times a year to make sure that

we're around them i mean i believe this

is an act of honoring them

they still love you they want to be

around

you and your

their grandkids as well

another way of showing honor then so

you're you're caring for them but

there's also an aspect of respect

toward one's parents um even with

disagreements i think they're not merely

a friend or a co-worker etc

and so even when there's disagreements

or issues going on that

that one

provides a proper level of respect even

in those disagreements

you know this is a relationship that you

will continue throughout your life

god willing and so you you do the kinds

of things to ensure that that

relationship can continue in a healthy

way

you might say in some sense it's better

to be wronged than to dishonor one's

parents now again obviously there's a

lot of

caveats that might need to be said about

this

and i'll get to that in a moment

um so what does this mean um

dignity and respect towards one's

parents for who they are caring for them

and respecting them

um and this is in the land that the lord

your god is giving you as i mentioned

already

this is a reminder that one is not one's

own

right they are not just hashtag blessed

because they go into land no they are

blessed by god to be a blessing they're

they have a role in this land they're

expected to fulfill it and enjoy god's

blessings

um and if they're going to do that then

they are going to be the kind of people

that god has called them to be

and the promise that's given

in both is that your days may be long in

the land that god has given you and

deuteronomy adds this

additional line that it may be

well with you and so in what sense is

this a promise as paul says in ephesians

6

or perhaps should we think of it as more

of a proverb

right when we think about proverbs we

think of proverbs as

general rules not a promise you know the

one that's often

said would be you know train up a child

and the way they should go and when

they're old they will not depart from it

you know and then we wring our hands

over this because we think well my

children aren't following the lord

but god has promised if i brought him up

in a right way that they will never

depart from that and you know is it then

we start to to doubt and wonder what's

right and wrong

but i think we we understand proverbs

are general rules uh that we can

understand you know if we want to have

children who are following the lord we

bring them up in the ways of god that's

how we would have the expectation that

they would continue to follow that it's

not a promise though or a guarantee

so is that what's going on with this

those who

learn to honor their parents

if they're doing so then god is

promising a long life and a wonderful

prosperous life well

we know lots of people who have honored

their parents

and you know whose lives are tragically

cut short for for one reason or another

or who

um are in a

perhaps a financially uh difficult place

or something like that is that god

failing to keep his promise here well no

if we think about this as a proverb

perhaps we understand this in a way that

you know those who are learning to honor

their parents they learn how to respect

authority

they learn how to conduct themselves in

a way that contributes to flourishing

right and is that primarily what we're

we're looking at with this

or are we thinking this as more of a

promise now say we allow for sins

effects life being cut short

due to sickness disease or just tragic

accidents or something like that

or other mysterious purposes of god

where he might

cause the life of a person to end what

we would say prematurely or tragically

um

the role of a parent is closely

paralleling

god's

role in our own lives or god's

relationship with his people he is the

one who is the giver and the sustainer

of life and teaching one how to live

so

i think there's something to this that

that the child whether an adult or

otherwise

honoring their parents is is closely

associated with how one honors god as

well and so to dishonor the parent is to

dishonor the position that god has given

that parent over them

and

the position that god himself has over

them so

uh to honor what god honors brings about

flourishing and length of days in his

kingdom

so

you know there's there's kind of those

two ways that we might look at this as

perhaps a proverb or perhaps as more of

a promise but i think

it's it's probably something more than a

mere proverb where it's sort of a

general rule if you do good things good

things happen if you honor your parents

uh you'll tend to respect authority and

and uh flourish in life and and live a

longer life because you've you've done

that i think it's something more than

that god is

as i mentioned that sort of causal link

um god is saying i

essentially if you expect to be blessed

and to live a long life

you will honor the institution of

parenthood you will honor your father

and mother that i've given you if you

can't even do that i certainly wouldn't

expect you to honor me

and there's no way that i will um

happily bless you and prosper you with

length of days and well-being in life so

i think there is something more

behind that than a mere proverb that

there's an aspect of promise there but

probably we need to be able to allow for

the effects of sin or god's mysterious

purposes in that feel free to ask

questions on that i know there's a lot

that can be said about that

all right so just looking at some

biblical context regarding honoring

one's parents

we can think of a few different examples

in the old testament one with in genesis

9 verses 20 to 27

we have this very odd passage where

noah has uncovered himself in his tent

and his son ham finds him and goes

outside and tells his brothers about it

his brothers respond by walking into the

tent backwards so that they they can't

see behind them to see their dad lying

naked behind them and they go in with a

garment and they go backwards and they

cover him up

so that

noah's shame is covered

of course when noah wakes up he's

quite

infuriated right and pronounces a curse

upon him

many people try to do

a lot of things with that arguing that

perhaps there was some sexual violation

occurring with noah or perhaps his

noah's wife or ham's mother

i don't think so i've studied this a

little bit i don't think so i think it

really is a matter of dishonoring their

father nakedness was a shameful thing

and ham's impulse after the flood

when sin was

wiped out supposedly right this is a

fresh start with humanity ham continues

to show that sinfulness in the human

person persisted even after the flood

and he dishonors his father by exposing

his shamefulness to his brothers in this

weak moment that noah was in ham

uncovers this to his brothers

and it's um

the shame is mitigated by the brothers

not looking at their father and covering

him up right so ham clearly is

dishonoring his father and i think this

kind of command

highlights the seriousness of not

honoring one's father and mother right

ham's

son kanan and his descendants bear this

curse for what ham had done

deuteronomy 21 18-21

we have an example of a stubborn and

rebellious son who was put to death

right his days were shortened um he was

wicked and rebellious and the penalty

for this was to kill him

uh if you want to know how seriously god

took this particular command there you

go right there's a an example of that

we have a few more um in the new

testament um i mentioned ephesians 6

we'll talk also about mark 7 verses 10

through 13.

jesus is talking to the religious

leaders and says to them you reject the

commandments of god by your traditions

and what is this tradition that they're

rejecting the command of god they say

what is what is what for you is

corbon

this is a gift that's given to god the

the money that should be given to care

for one's parents in their aging years

if the if the people would give that to

god instead dedicated to some kind of

holy use then they would sort of

disentangle themselves from the

obligation to care for their parents in

their old age and jesus is like how is

this

honoring god's you're

rejecting the command of god to honor

your parents by supposedly this other

tradition that you can give those things

to god and that's not what god has told

you from the very beginning

um so rather than providing for parents

they're they're supposedly giving this

money to god that doesn't honor your

parents you're disobeying god and

dishonoring your parents at the same

time even while you try to do it in this

religious guise of generosity to the

lord

no thanks

and then lastly we'll look at ephesians

6 1-13 and this is

that command that paul i was mentioning

referencing in his household

code he points back to this command to

honor your father and mother indicates

this was the first command with a

promise

and you know in this

paul is certainly referencing

children he's directing this command to

children primarily to obey their parents

and believing children would be guided

by this but i think it also is a

command given to children that parents

then understand their responsibility to

teach their children to obey them

um it's it's beyond mere obedience to

god's command you're teaching them how

to follow god-given authority

particularly god himself and so even

that command the children's our children

are to obey their parents

even that is a command for parents to

recognize this is some one of the things

that i need to teach my children

in this case okay so enduring relevance

uh just a couple things i'll say about

this and then we'll we'll wrap up this

lecture

um one it is a

holy thing to respect and care for one's

parents

um appropriate to every stage of life so

things that i mentioned like keeping in

contact with them visiting them

making grandkids available to them

making yourself available to them

it can be very easy as you grow up as

you leave your home you sort of just

go away and you may not think too much

or think about oh if they want to talk

to me they can reach out to me or

something like that i know there's an

honor in maintaining that relationship

in a healthy way because these these are

the people that god gave to you

to give you life to sustain you to teach

you and train you up

other things would be then caring for

them as they age perhaps they're losing

their spouse or having significant

medical issues or something like that

that first and foremost we recognize as

as their children that responsibility

falls on us now perhaps circumstances

are extenuating in some way that that we

need to

delegate that to someone else perhaps

someone that has better

skills or knowledge or ability to care

for them but but we see that as our

responsibility to ensure that that's

happening

and then lastly i would say respecting

them again especially when there are

disagreements that there's no pride or

dismissiveness even if it's warranted

right that our parents require an a

certain kind of honor that's due to them

given by god simply because they are our

parents

and that's not a popular message in a

culture a 21st century western culture

especially right you know oh our parents

they didn't know what they were doing

this that you know they're a bunch of

old fuddy-duddies whatever

right but but that's not even honoring

them in our hearts to recognize that

they've done something that we ourselves

haven't done yet right successfully

raised children into adulthood right

they're always going to be a step ahead

of us in some ways no matter what right

now this does bring the question though

what about bad parents

um and i i don't want to say this

lightly at all i understand i was i was

blessed so very blessed to grow up in a

home with wonderful parents the same

thing for my wife

but i know all too well that that many

did not

experience that one or perhaps both of

their parents there were particular

problems of perhaps abuse divorce in the

home

a loss of a parent at an early age or

something like that or growing up in

dangerous environments because of this

and in these cases the duty to honor

one's parents has not gone away

and unfortunately becomes more

burdensome than delight in these kinds

of cases

i think the call is that we

um

we have to seek out any way that we can

possibly continue to honor

them as our parents

particularly because of god being the

one who appointed them into this role

that doesn't mean we go along with

sinful things that don't mean that

doesn't mean we enable certain kinds of

things to happen

um if it's not safe

for some reason to have yourself or your

children in their lives you know this

command doesn't override wisdom but but

sometimes just like the religious

leaders we let wisdom

um push out the honor that god has

called us to give to our parents and so

if we would refrain from being in their

lives or giving our children to allow

them to be in their lives that we would

do so

uh i would say with fear and trembling

that we have carefully considered

in

in every way possible have we made an

effort to honor our parents for who they

are and so i hope you can see the both

and in there

i would want you to push

beyond what

you know our culture might

advocate for it it's very easy for us to

say forget them you know

they've been this way or done this thing

i want to have nothing to do with them

and i think the lord would call us to

something more than that even if it has

to unfortunately fall short of this

thriving flourishing blessing of a

relationship that god would still call

us to honor them in some way shape or

form

so so with that um we will wrap up this

on on honoring one's parents again

whether this is a hinge point whether

this is with the first five or with the

second or the you know the latter six or

something like that

honoring one's parents

um

turns our attention to loving one's

neighbor as ourselves